Do you feel the need to hang out with other CDs/TVs?

[Nesreen]

Do any of you girls have this need to hang out with other Transvestites or CDs and have fun getting en-femme. You know, people who they can relate with your situation. Just for friendship. Most of my friends don't know that I Crossdress and I am actually officially a Transvestite. I take it more than just dressing up. I just feel the need to show off and have fun being en-femme with others. Being in closet all these years is killing me!

I tried Facebook but boy... God... I was shocked. Since I am from the Middle East everyone I met (from around where I live) is claiming to be a CD/TV but they are not!! most of them are homosexual predators with their mouth wetting for PICTURES PICTURES PICTURES!!!

I have nothing against homosexuals!! but those predators are nasty. When I look for someone with "character" someone decent... I just get flooded with sexual predators and people with personalities as flat as my chest! All what they care for is SEX!! :eek: They can't all be CDs because there must be some classy Ladies out there and they can't be CDs because a lot of them lose me when I start talking about makeup or even bra size!!

There are no more Ladies out there. They all died :sad:. I failed to find any loving Queens from the Middle East, not on facebook at least. All what I got is Bob who's only interested to see a picture of my butt :brolleyes:

It's sad :daydreaming: I just wish I can find someone who's into true friendship where we can share our interest together. But I guess that's impossible... at least for where I live...

What do you Ladies think? Is there a lot of lonely Transvestites/CDs out there? or am one of the few unlucky ones?

[Katie83]

I know exactly where you are coming from. I would love to have some cd/tv friends that live locally to enjoy being feminine with. But as you've found most of the people that make contact are only interested in one thing (not crossdressing). It is very frustrating.
Katie

[*Vanessa*]

Do you feel the need to hang out with other CDs/TVs?

YES!

[brassieres]

I would prefer to hang out with gg's myself. However, I am sure that I could learn a thing or two from other crossdressers though. Thats why I appreciate this forum. There is a lot of clsssy ladies here. :)

[VanessaJCD]

I would like to meet other cd's in my area.. One day I may be able to go out with others in a safe environment. My venture out this weekend was my first step in feeling comfortable.

[cassandra54]

yes is would be nice find other girls and ggs to do things with. but yeah, look in personal ads and on adult sites, it's just scary.

[bridget thronton]

This lovely group of folks in this forum are as close as I get to hanging out with CD's. Most of the posters I might be quite happy to meet in RL, some perhaps not.

[Eryn]

I certainly enjoy being with other like-minded folks. It's great to be able to talk about what comes into my mind rather then having to guard my thoughts as I usually do.

One does have to be careful, though. I don't think that mainstream conduits like Facebook or Craigslist are really a good avenue through which to meet other CDers. There are too many non-CDers amusing themselves by trolling there.

I think that this site can be a good place through which meet people. Most of the people here have a post history that you can read and it would be too much trouble for a troll to post convincingly here for months before becoming predatory. You still need to be careful, but at least you have some information about the person at the other end of the 'net.

[Kate Simmons]

Hi Hon, I mostly care about my friends for who they are as people, not necessarily because of what they wear. Anyway, once you get 10 posts PM me and we can talk about many subjects. It's nice to have someone to talk to who is a legitimate person in any case. Take care, Abby. :)

[Barbra P]

Hi Nesreen

I can’t speak to the Middle-Eastern culture; I’m referring to the Middle East term as applied to the world as a whole and not just the U.S. However Transvestite has sort of taken on a meaning that is somewhat different than a Cross Dresser in that Transvestite frequently connotes a connotation of someone who dresses enfemme for sexual gratification. I know my Therapist uses that definition for Transvestite to distinguish them from cross dressers who do not dress for sexual gratification. Others on here may have a completely different view on the term Transvestite.

To address your question, yes I like to associate with other CD’s and even TS’s. The support group to which I belong is primarily CD’s but there are a few TS’s, including the President of the organization. I also enjoy sitting and chatting with GG’s. I find it pleasurable to chat with GG’s and especially when they are accepting and treat me as just another woman, whether that is singular or in a group of GG’s. On the other hand chatting with other CD’s is nice because I learn firsthand their experiences and they are frequently more open and honest than many GG’s. Another CD may be more willing to be honest and tell you what you may be doing that is not feminine and what you might try to do to correct the fault – that is something you don’t get from the forum. People on the forum only have what you write to judge you by, they are not witnessing you firsthand, and even with pictures your demeanor and actions are not apparent.

I was recently surprised when another CD told me that when in the Ladies Room, or anywhere else for that matter, and another woman walks in and your eyes meet, just smile, don’t smile and nod your head because nodding the head tends to be a male attribute. I had some doubts about this but other CD’s more or less confirmed it. Recently I had a chance to try it out, I was in the Ladies Room and having come out of the stall I was touching up my makeup when another woman walked in, she glanced in my direction and our eyes met in the mirror, she smiled at me and I smiled back and she went on her way and entered the stall. I’m sure if I’d said anything I would have been instantly read and maybe if I had nodded I would have been read too – guess I’ll never know, but she showed no discomfort with me being in the Ladies Room. I half expected her to leave and go hunt up the restaurant manager but she went into the stall as I finished applying my lipstick. That incident really bolstered my confidence and I felt a lot more at ease as I walked back through the restaurant.

[Vickie_CDTV]

Given where you are from, I would also worry about being set up by the authorities or some group of vigilantes out to hurt others who are different.

I believe there was a TV/TS contact group out of Turkey where others could write and meet each other, but I don't know if it still exists (or in the current climate there would still be legal.)

[PretzelGirl]

First, I would say you are better off finding CD/TG friends at places like support groups or other places where you can meets face to face in a safe place. You never know what you are getting on the Internet.

For me, my need for interaction with others is addressed through a few groups I go to. But I meet some of them outside of groups and that isn't a need, that is friendship. Even some of the drive to go to groups is about friendships.

[celeste26]

If I dont get out and meet others it seems like I tend to collapse into my cocoon and depression and that is something I've done far too much of already. So I go seeking others to keep myself from going back to that dark place.

[Nesreen]

Thank you Ladies for your feedback!

I guess if I wasn't in-closet still I wouldn't have this "need" to be other other CDs/TVs. Since I am still in the closet and there are very few people who knows this private way of life of mine and I'm usually being my feminine self almost always alone which is killing me. I do enjoy the sexual side of cross dressing, however, 80% of the time I just want to be Nesreen the person... and be able to talk with others being Nesreen. Just normal conversation with people you like.. sexuality has nothing to do with it!

I'm not very good with terminologies and I actually despise them because I believe every individual is unique. However, sometimes they are helpful to explain yourself without writing a paragraph by saying "I'm a Transvestite" or "I'm a Crossdresser" but I'm not sure what the difference is. I always thought a Crossdresser was a person who likes to dress up in the other sex's clothes while the Transvestite goes beyond that by actually embodying - full time or part time - a persona of the opposite sex (or male to female in particular).

Oh, and what's a GG? :battingeyelashes:

[t-girlxsophie]

I certinly dont fancy walking into the pub,dressed in all my finery and saying to my mates "alright boys,my round is it?" lol.I do like being with my TG friends,If it wasnt for them I would still be in the closet,but as I have grown in confidence,I have decided to start socialising with my GG (genetic girls) friends from work,my big outing being next week when they are coming to our house for a girly evening.Hopefully (fingers crossed) it will be a success,and maybe next time can go out with them.

Sophie

[JillyNylonz]

Yes I also would like to have CD friends to talk with, even dress with, but no sex. I do get plenty of offers from men, and even some cd 's for sex fun, but nothing beyond that it seems.

[Kittyagain]

Seems like another thread suggested doing a search using sisters as a key word. Like if you lived in FL then Sisters in FL something like that.

Although I have not been here long, I have only seen one possible leading post. The moderators need a good pat on the back for keeping the forum free of the bad post.

The PM's I have received have all been nice and often very helpful.

Kitty

[billie earls]

Yes I do have the need to be able to talk to others like me but being that I'm in the closet my time is very limited as to when I can get away and meet others. I would love to find someone within 15 minutes of me so that meeting even for coffee would be possible.

[kristinacd55]

Well, I joined meetup.com back in November of last year. Went to my first support group meeting in February and met some girls in person! And since then, I've gotten to know some of my best friends and it's changed the way I look at my whole tg experience. I go to a club once every 8 weeks and have a blast, and just meeting these gurls has been awesome. :)

[Cally]

Hi Nesreen

I have found that having CD friends has been really helpful. I was really lucky to have met a transgender girl who has been like a big sister to me. She has introduced me to many different girls, some of whom are a bit preditory, but you get that with some. However, they seem to get my message that "I'm simply not that sort of girl" (said with a nice smile) and it's all good from there. She has taught me many things and we talk about everything.

Being able to go out to places where I know CDs can socialise is great fun, and confidence and experience building, but alas it put pressure on the wardrobe. :-)

It sounds like where you are, this might not be possible, but at least there are good online support groups such as this one.

Good luck and keep looking

Cally

[Debutante]

Yes, we hae been lonely. But we also seek out other CDs through legitimate CD clubs and groups and support groups.
If there are none, you may have to form one. Lokk for best practices with groups around the world.
But define it carefully, to keep predators away, and to have it as a good support group to help other CDs in all ways...........

[Duana]

In the beginning, when I was less secure in public, I wanted to be with other TGs. As I became more secure, and because I have an SO who always goes out with me, I don't feel the need. I've really only met one or two CDs in Houston that go out regularly AND I'm interested in hanging out with. The group I'm a member of in Houston, seems to be made up of mostly gay CDs who want to transition. They like to hang out in the gayborhood and not the rest of the city. I'm ok with gay places but again, that was more for security. Now I hang out at straight places and feel very comfortable.

I would like more "solid" crossdressing friends, for example, those that are married and have a supporting SO, but the fact is, they are few and far between. Nothing is more frustrating than to be friends with a closeted CD who can only go out when the wife is out of town.

Anyway, we're really happy doing what we're doing now with very little contact with other TG people.

[Carol A]

YES!, since we retired and moved thier are a few other sisters in the area but nobody talks about it.
I know of others because of GG on a forum for my area. I miss being with my girlfriends and doing girl things.

[hiddenwoman]

First, I would say you are better off finding CD/TG friends at places like support groups or other places where you can meets face to face in a safe place. You never know what you are getting on the Internet.

For me, my need for interaction with others is addressed through a few groups I go to. But I meet some of them outside of groups and that isn't a need, that is friendship. Even some of the drive to go to groups is about friendships.Well said, Sue, well said.

[Kaz]

This may sound wierd but here goes... I play guitar in a band that plays local smallish to mid-size venues... I did better gigs when I was younger... but am I interested in seeing other bands at my level? Not really... Am I interested in sharing stories about what it is like and how we can learn with other musos.. yes!

So with CDs... do I feel the need to meet with other CDs... not really (although I have made a few friends here that I would like to meet! And not for sex... but because I genuinely like them)... I know a CD guy at work reasonably well, but I haven't mentioned my status... we are colleagues on a level that I think is more important professionally.. one day I suspect and hope it will all come out... but I don't see that as being important.

So what am I saying? I hang out here. I dream of being with other CDs, but the reality is that I have too many barriers.

[SusanCACD]

Oh yea, I would love to have another "person" like me to talk to and relate to. It is really lonely being as I am. I hope someday i have the courage to reach out in real life. This forum is wonderful, but it can't replace real live interaction, (not intercourse). Maybe someday ...

[AllieSF]

My first goal when I started dressing was to go out into the real world eat in places that I would eat in as a male, go to theaters, clubs, museums, whatever. I realized that the best way to do that was with a fellow CD friend (or more). So, what has worked for me is to try to meet others either locally or who may travel to your area for work or play. I have met several very close friends from this site and others. From those friends I continue to network with them and others to enlarge my circle of "T" friends. It has worked wonderfully for me, but it took and continues to take a lot of effort on my part. Unfortunately, most of my best friends are travelers coming to my area occasionally. With all the personal logistic problems when trying to meet, you will need a lot of friends. If you have local CD's, then try to meet with as many as possible until you find one or more that more or less compliments your personality and personal preferences. You just need to take the first steps and filter out the ones that do not meet your needs. Good luck and welcome to the forum.

[leannejames2011]

I would be interested in meeting other CD/TG or even GG for friends only where we could get together and talk or go shopping together. Like you, Nesreen, the only "group" I have found in my state is looking for sex only. I'm not a CD because I want sex. I'm a CD because I feel that is what I need to do and feel comfortable dressing this way. I have a great GG girlfriend for any bedroom activites I need and to her it doesn't matter if I'm Leannne or my male self.

BTW, no one has mentioned it to you yet so GG means Genetically Born Girl.

-- Leanne

[Debglam]

I can't say strongly enough how terrific it is to meet others like ourselves face-to-face!

I'm lucky enough to have a TG group in my town. I met some of these girls on this forum and after tons of verbal handholding and encouragement, I was able to dress, get in my car in broad daylight, and drive across town to one of their events. It was scary and I was afraid that as nice as these women were on-line, maybe they would be different in real life. Maybe they would be mean, weird, creepy, etc., meaning that I REALLY was alone! Well, they were some of the nicest people I have ever met! Not nice TG's but nice people, PERIOD! I had never walked into a new group of people in any circumstance (social, business, etc.) where they were as welcoming and friendly as these women were. They are like sisters to me and I mean that!

I understand that some of us reach a level of comfort where we no longer need to meet with TG-specific groups. They just dress and go out on our own without the need for the camaraderie of other transwomen. I understand that but for me, even if I reach that point I will never forget the kindness shown me and will always want to be friends with other TG women.

If you have a group anywhere near you - check them out. My group, the River City Gems (http://www.rivercitygems.org), has a drab meeting once a month and I assume other groups do to. If you are not comfortable going out dressed then you can simply meet some friends for lunch in guy-mode. It is a real comfort to have friends that "get" it!

Good Luck!
Debby

[Nikki A.]

I have friends and belong to groups that are TG centered or accepting. I have been out with them and have had a great time in many different venues. I also have GG friends who know about Nikki and have gone out with them also.
In the begining CD or TG friends make it easier to go out, but once you get used to going out, I found that I just enjoy going out with friends no matter who they are,

[Anna Bee]

I've finally found a cd friend. We'll be hanging out within the next couple of weeks if all goes to plan. I can't wait, I'm pathetically lonely :(

[DebbieL]

These days there isn't as much need. Back in my teens and twenties, I would have given ANTHING to meet other cross-dressers. I really thought I was one of a kind, that no other boys or men felt the way I did. When I met my first drag queen, I was 18 years old, and I wanted to talk to her and ask her questions and find out if she would help me look as beautiful as she did, but she didn't want anything to do with me (I was too young for sex and liked girls).

Talking with other cross-dressers, transsexuals, and transgendered men and women online was huge. It was like I was no longer alone in the world.

I was aa year later, bout 32 when I finally went to a meeting of cross-dressers. Most of the girls were not passible at all, and even the few that were visibly appealing, were given away by their voices. These were strictly cross-dressers, no pre-op or post-op transsexuals.

Finally, about 1992, I finally went to a club where there were transsexuals as well as transvestites. Here there were several girls who were quite beautiful, dressed very well, and even spoke like women. There were couple I would have dated, even though I knew they were pre-op. As long as I could be a girl too. I had learned all I knew from GGs and had learned make-up, posture, walk, sitting, manners, and speaking - from women. But there were things these girls could teach me, especially how it was going through the transition. I learned about electrolysis, who did it, how much it cost, and where to find a therapist in my area and where to get HRT.

It was only when my wife told me that the school social worker was willing to send a letter to the court requiring supervised visitation so that I would not be able to see the kids as Debbie, that I realized that I could not go further.

[Lexine]

I'm going to type what I'm thinking, so I apologize if this turns out to be a TL;DR post.

I've only been out and about for a year now, with a year of CDing under my belt and, while I do have CD/TS friends, I find that I like hanging out with GGs a bit more.

Now this isn't because I would rather be lumped and be "just one with the girls" with my GG friends. I feel that a lot of my TG friends feel comfortable when hanging out in a more TG friendly environment. Most of the clubs they hang out in are either fetishy and/or filled with TG admirers, some of which are men who are several years my senior. Since I look like I'm in my mid-20s (I'm really in my early 30s), I feel like a lolita going into a room filled with dirty old men.

Needless to say, this feeling makes me very uncomfortable. This saddens me because I feel that the similarities between me and my TG friends are disappearing. I love them as I feel they are my sisters, but the environments we like to indulge in differ immensely. It's because of this very reason that I now see them rarely and actively seek other avenues to go out en femme.

So do I feel the need to hang out with other CDs/TVs? Not really, but the ones that I do know I'd like to hang out with more in a different environment than they're used to. And probably a little bit more often.

[Jessica86]

I feel lonely sometimes. I recently found out my best friend has dressed before, but I haven't gotten too much into it, fearing I would be caught. I just want to present it at a better time when its just us, and not a lot of people, like how I found out about him. It would be very nice just to hang around some CD friends who share my same interests.

[Annie D]

I enjoy being with other CD's just as much as I enjoy hanging out with anyone else when I am dressed as Annie. It is not as much as who the other people are but rather if they are accepting of me and my lifestyle. Acceptance is most important in any relationship.

[SweetTransvestite]

No other ones to hang out with in my area. Heh, I do imagine it'd be a lot better to know one though...at the very least I have mentioned it to a few non-dressing friends.

[Kaitlyn Michele]

I can't say strongly enough how terrific it is to meet others like ourselves face-to-face!


Debby

Over and over i have seen this to be true..

CD's are everywhere...

[BRANDYJ]

I can't say it's a need, but I do like to be with other like minded friends. I have not been out in a long time and sure, I miss it. I'd love to have a friend that also dresses and be able to dress around each other. But I'd want that friend to be into other things I like too. Like fishing, golf or just hanging around as 2 makes too. I used to have such a friend, but he passed away about 3 years ago.

[mitchellmitch16]

I would love to meet some like minded and dressed ladies in the DFW are to meet up with and share ideas etc..

[Nesreen]

I'm grateful for this community and I appreciate everyone's participation in the subject. I was thinking maybe some time later we can hold annual meetings for Crossdressers.com members! Now imagine how would THAT meeting going to be like? :daydreaming:

[JenniferR771]

I have met several members on this site. And now go to a local support group. Scroll down and investigate possible groups near you. And be sure to send note to others who may be near you.

[Amanda22]

Once in awhile, I like to meet a CD friend to hang out with as a change of pace. But I never feel the need to do it. In other words, if I never meet another CD girl for coffee I'd be totally OK with it. However, this may be due to the fact that I'm very lucky to be married to my wonderful wife who encourages and quite actively participates in my presenting as a woman. Also, I love being with GGs socially! It's incredible. GG's acceptance of me just does unbelievable things for my confidence.

[glynnis]

Would love to meet up with other crossdressers,gay or straight so we could compare clothes and makeup.I love being a gurl.

[Lynn Marie]

I was very fortunate in that I was able to meet another CDer from this forum and she helped me out of the closet and out the door. I'm now part of a group that meets every Friday night at a LGBT establishment 30 miles away. Our group pretty much owns the place on Friday nights. The gurls I've met have become some of my closest friends, and I'm always grateful for their help with my wardrobe and look. All of us encourage others and are more than willing to help our sisters grow and find a social venue to be a part of. We stay in touch with texting, emails, and we have a Yahoo T-gurls group.

[suchacutie]

Here I go again taking a completely different route! For me, going out and hanging with anyone outside of my wife is just not all that interesting. First and foremost, I like hanging with my wife, wherever that may take us. I'm not against the two of us meeting and hanging out with others, but I have a rather time-consuming job and we already can't find enough time to be together, and the fact that she splits her time between my gendered selves is, to me, miraculous! If you see what I mean, a quiet candle-light dinner for the two of us (and all the rest) is just incredibly preferable to a noisy crowded anything. :)

[Valerie1973]

I have a CDing buddy and it has been allot of fun when we've had the time to girl up and go out. I have another friend who CD's but I cant bring myself to be around him en femme. People are people, Cder's or not. It's how comfortable you feel with that individual whether they dress or not. I'm not comfortable around my SO.

[kimdl93]

Thus far, I haven't had the opportunity to hang out with any other CDrs, but I think it would be fun. I really enjoyed being one of the girls at a bar a few weeks ago. I've never felt more welcome or accepted.

[sterling12]

Do I NEED to hang with other Sisters....don't know? I know I enjoy it! Down here in my Area, we seem to have A very large Community, and it seems like every week there is an Event, or A Party, or A Meeting, or just A "Night Out with The Gurls," that I could attend. Tonight for instance, a very good friend who is a Transman is being "feted' at an Event to raise some money for A Leadership Conference that The Community wants him to attend. He is The President of an Advocacy Group for ALL Trans People. Films, Happy Hour at A Club, and probably a lot of socializing will occur. Tonight I can't make it, but I should attend, and I imagine I will make a small donation.

But, I don't think we are unique down here in Florida. I imagine this same Social Framework exists around most any Urban Environment in The United States. The Trick is that you have to get involved, tune-in to The Network, and become a friendly, social animal. Saturday Night, we had A Tea, Dinner, and a Ladies Social in St. Pete. My Tri-Beta Group and our Resident Psychologist who works with The T-Community were sponsors, and we had around fifty gals. Great time for everyone, I think!

And I'm not mentioning this stuff to "rub it in." I think there are lots of opportunities out there for everyone. But, if you sit in your bedroom, dressing up and traveling from there to The Bathroom only......then your never going to ever get a chance to be around "your own kind." For those who Long to be among like-minded friends, "just do it!" Find A Group to join, hook up with people in The Vicinity who "go out." Trust me, your Sisters who are Out of The Bedroom, don't bite, aren't any stranger than yourself, and are receiving a particular satisfaction that only comes from public appearances. If you "do it," you'll be amazed at The Improvements in your Mental Health. All The Hiding, all The Repression, disappears. I've never met anyone who did not benefit from interfacing with other Gals in The Community. I've never met anyone who once out, decided they wanted to go back to The Bedroom.

Peace and Love, Joanie

[Stephanie47]

I do not have a CD buddy or know of any other CDers in my area, although I know there is a least one local group (35 miles away). I don't know, if I need a CD buddy. Since my CDing has been a totally private affair since teenage years, it would be difficult to just reveal myself to another. Some of the responses I've read are really disturbing. I've thought about just mingling in a supposed safe environment (club), but, it seems most of them are pick up joints. Being married I'm not interested. Being straight I'm not interested in guys, who are "interested" in CDers. They are directly in conflict with my core beliefs.

The only advertisements I've ever seen on the Internet that appeal to me are the CD conventions. Total anaminity and no requirement to continue further in developing a friendship. No guys trolling for sex. The annual event in Port Angeles, WA appears to be a pleasant event, since it is an annual event, in part hosted and promoted by the town. The locals are use to it.

Somehow it is all rather confusing. Do you seek a friend just because he also wears clothes? Is there a mutual interest other than wearing feminine clothing? Great to meet once in awhile. But, all the time? If I met somebody who shared my hobbies, I wouldn't care if he was straight, gay, a cross-dresser or a woman. Ever go to one of those cocktail parties where everyone is bored out of their skulls? I'd really have to think about it.

[msginaadoll]

Well first of all everyone I have met here has been wonderful, and also a great experience. I just wish I had time to get out more. I also know a few ladies from local clubs I enjoy hanging out with. Lastly I am on the crossdresserchatcity forum. And consider some of those ladies as friends.

[Debglam]

Over and over i have seen this to be true..

CD's are everywhere...

Yes! And I am still amazed at how nice and how normal most of the TG people I have met are!

[Josephine]

I would love to have other cd girls as friends here where I live. I am new to this going out idea, and it would be nice to have a friend to share it with. Going out is much more fun going with a friend or two, or three, than going alone.

[Jenny B]

While on one hand i'd be happy to keep it as my own private hobby on the other....honestly i'd enjoy to hang out with a understanding GG or cd. i'm rather timid and alone and like someone to just learn from.

[SweetIonis]

This is something that I really want to do. It would be so much fun. I went out a few times a a while back. Damn, it was so much fun!!!!

[Nesreen]

I do not have a CD buddy or know of any other CDers in my area, although I know there is a least one local group (35 miles away). I don't know, if I need a CD buddy. Since my CDing has been a totally private affair since teenage years, it would be difficult to just reveal myself to another. Some of the responses I've read are really disturbing. I've thought about just mingling in a supposed safe environment (club), but, it seems most of them are pick up joints. Being married I'm not interested. Being straight I'm not interested in guys, who are "interested" in CDers. They are directly in conflict with my core beliefs.

The only advertisements I've ever seen on the Internet that appeal to me are the CD conventions. Total anaminity and no requirement to continue further in developing a friendship. No guys trolling for sex. The annual event in Port Angeles, WA appears to be a pleasant event, since it is an annual event, in part hosted and promoted by the town. The locals are use to it.

Somehow it is all rather confusing. Do you seek a friend just because he also wears clothes? Is there a mutual interest other than wearing feminine clothing? Great to meet once in awhile. But, all the time? If I met somebody who shared my hobbies, I wouldn't care if he was straight, gay, a cross-dresser or a woman. Ever go to one of those cocktail parties where everyone is bored out of their skulls? I'd really have to think about it.

The problem is, Stephanie, I believe we all have those "friends" who share our interest. But speaking for myself I don't have any friend who share this specific and secret way of life. I think it's bigger than any hobby I've ever had yet it's hard to meet any like minded people. I have plenty of friends who are into the hobbies that I like and we talk all about our hobbies, this is true for everyone and I think comes by default! It's just sad to easily find friends who can relate to you with your, say, music hobby but not with your Crossdressing/Transvestite way of life. Which I believe takes a greater part of myself and my life than any hobby.

It gets even harder when where you live, by law, you are to be sent to prison for just being en-femme :(

[Vieja]

I don't feel a need to hang out with other CDs but it would be nice to sit and talk now and then. I only had actual face time with one other CD. It was at his house and as my wardrobe is limited

he let me try on some of his extensive treasure trove of clothing. Alas he moved away so no hanging out.


Vieja

[Wendae]

It would be nice to have a CD girlfriend but I don't think I would be comfortable in a group. Would love to have a GG friend.

[NicoleScott]

For the most part, I'm satisfied with my makeup and dressup endeavors, and I've been out in public and into shops and a club to my satisfaction and I'm now pretty happy playing dressup in private. The one thing left on my crossdresser bucket list is to have a small group of cd friends to meet with, talk to, dress up with, maybe go out with, and discuss all aspects of crossdressing with. Just looking for similar-minded cd friends.
Ah, similar. That's the rub. What drives each of us to transform is different. And our presentation styles are vastly different. As an over-the-top pleasure dresser, I don't think I would be on the same wavelength as someone who has a strong feminine identity and wants to dress conservatively to blend. Someone like me would be a better companion for me.
So it won't be as easy as just finding a local cd who also wants to meet. A lot of communication first. Looking for a good match.
I don't think it will happen.

[Roberta Young]

Having joined and went to many meetings of crossdressers i have found all of us are normal people , some just a little different, but all SISTERS at heart. helped me understand i AM normal. all friends forever. luv Roberta

[Sarasometimes]

I wouldn't mind having an anonymous CD cantact (Karren comes to mind) just to run things by and get another's veiw. I find her and I are of the same mind quite often. As for meeeting another CD for a chat I don't see a need. My therapy office used to have a group meeting once a month and I always passed on it for a couple of reasons. The night of the week was bad and I did have a fear that I might meet someone I knew! Lossing my confidentiality is of a great concern. A friend and confidant one minute may not be the next, call me a skeptic. I never devulge true personal details in my travels.
Now having a GG girlfriend (strickly non sexual) would be fantastic. But again that would need to be anonymous from my end.

[Chrissy be good]

I would love to have a CD friend. I'm not one for bars or clubs and pretty much a homebody, but it would be awesome to be able to chill out at a friend's house. I've thought about placing a Craigslist ad in the plutonic section, but that scares the hell out of me, and can only imagine the responses I'd get. The forums here have helped alot, making me realize that I'm not alone with some of the feelings I have, and have had very similar experiences, but nothing seems to beat that face time.

[brassieres]

I have actually posted ad's in the platonic section of Craiglist looking for women to talk to. Only emails transpired though, and to date hadn't gotten any harrassment at all.

[Lori B]

I do and I`ve found a friend on this forum who lives nearby,we both hope to get the opportunity to go out together and enjoy ourselves!:daydreaming::hugs:

[missmillie]

I'm going to get myself in trouble on this one, I would love to hang with other cders but at the present I do enjoy going out and hanging with my female nurse counterparts. They all know me and that I love this cd thing so we do have a lot of fun when we go out .
I would rather go out with the girls than hang in a crusty bar with a bunch of make believe or wanna be jocks just has never been my forte.
I am always cd dressed when we go out and as I said before, it is none of my business what anyone thinks I am me and that's who I will be.
Love Mllie

PS: it is strictly plutonic not for who I get to jump in bed with.

[SarahLynn]

Other than on this site, no.

SarahLynn

[Theresa_W]

While on one hand i'd be happy to keep it as my own private hobby on the other....honestly i'd enjoy to hang out with a understanding GG or cd. i'm rather timid and alone and like someone to just learn from.

I can understand that. Sometimes it's good to talk with someone who understands where you're coming from. My wife has a TS friend, that for so long I've wanted to sit down and have a talk with. My dilemma is that I don't think she is aware that I know & I don't want to "out her". So, to have a friend who is CD to talk to privately, would be wonderful.

Hugs,
Terri

[erintemp]

this subject has been on my mind alot lately. I was just talking to a gg friend of mine about going to boys town and seeing what happens, but i don't know if am ready for this yet. I think it would be great to have a cd friend to share thoughts with.

[Samantha W]

I would love to have a CD friend to hang out with. In the last six months I have come out to a few people I thought would be OK with Samantha.

One couple and a GG are cool with it and have no problem if I come to their houses dressed. It feels so good to be comfortable enough to forget that I’m a CD. Does that make sense?

I have also made a few acquaintances at the Clubs in Minneapolis. Again, it feels so good, not stand out and I to just be myself.

After all these years of hiding, I think its extremely important to have a group of someone’s that you can feel comfortable with, whether CD/TG or not.

[frax24]

it would be nice especially for a up and coming CD like me ... it is important to have some girls to cheer you on and motivate you. i hope to meet girls around where i live. :) it'd be nice

[Stephanie47]

The problem is, Stephanie, I believe we all have those "friends" who share our interest. But speaking for myself I don't have any friend who share this specific and secret way of life. I think it's bigger than any hobby I've ever had yet it's hard to meet any like minded people. I have plenty of friends who are into the hobbies that I like and we talk all about our hobbies, this is true for everyone and I think comes by default! It's just sad to easily find friends who can relate to you with your, say, music hobby but not with your Crossdressing/Transvestite way of life. Which I believe takes a greater part of myself and my life than any hobby.

It gets even harder when where you live, by law, you are to be sent to prison for just being en-femme :(

I do not think the vast majority of us realize the degree of anxiety or terror you must feel. The most adverse consequence I and most of us would experience would be rejection by people we care about. I can easily start over. There may be some economic consequences, but, nothing that cannot be overcome.

I am fortunate because I live in a city and state which protects minority sexual lifestyles- gay, lesbians, transsexuals and cross-dressers- from discrimination in housing and employment. Embarrassment does not equal incarceration or physical punishment.

[nikkijo]

nope.. dont need to be with other TS/TV/CD/ect to hve fun as myself..... :)

[JaytoJillian]

Do you feel the need to hang out with other CDs/TVs?

YES!

yes, yes, indeed. those are the best times

[noeleena]

Hi ,Nesreen,

Im a bit different, many of my friends are over in Austraila as iv been over there , & have been out & stayed with them most like dressing , tho i have a few who are trans, & next year i will be doing the same for about 4 weeks .allso i have other friends who are women,

like my self, & i have been invited to go see them,

Where ever i go im just accepted,

In New Zealand were i live Waimate in the south isl we do not have any trans or dresser's out & about of under 5.000 people im pretty much the only one who is different, & they all know about my self & background.

Up in christchurch 2 .1 / 2 hours by road i do know a good few both trans & dresser's , down south in Dunedin 1 . 1 / 2 hours away, i know a few there as well plus our friends who we stay with for us Jos & i & our grandaugter we are close friends , 2 women & one has a young child & its lovely being with them .

For my self, my dresser friends just accept who i am & theres no hang up's because im different, *& we talk about most normal things .

The other side is im involved with women only groups & mixed as well. i dress in 1900's & the Renaissance times so we have get to gethers & really do enjoy our selfs , & with our Renaissance group we spend a week to gether just after xmas time at a camp. over 200 people , again im the only one who comes as being different, & im well accepted,
Tho most of my friends are woman ,

For my self im a stand alone person because it was not posible to be with trans or dresser's because of a lot of traviling so i knew many women over years of liveing here in our area so its no surprise that my friends are women .

So some times it can be hard as i found out over the last 15 years , & more so for those of you who are in county's that look down on difference's & how others need to present them selfs,

At least we have been given through the generosty of others our forums & that has been so great, so thanks to those who have made that posible,

...noeleena...

[zorianacd]

For me, a little bit. I think every one who is on this board is seeking a little validation and hanging out with other CDer's can potentially fulfill that need. But the spectrum of crossdressing and the reasons for why we dress are so broad that it is difficult to find common ground much of the time. For example, I went on a Dignity cruise which was fun. It was nice being able to dress and prance around. But I was the youngest one there and so felt a little out of place. Everyone was into different aspects of dressing and that variety was great to see. But I felt that during this trip, there was a focus on a little more of the psychological aspect of why we dress. I'm just not interested in that because I don't care about why I'm dressing. I just like to do it, period. I don't need to rationalize it to myself. What I want out of dressing is to maximize the creation of my feminine illusion. For me, that's wearing the latest, trendiest clothes and shoes and applying the "in" makeup techniques. It would be nice to find others who are into dressing for same reasons, but not imperative. There was another post earlier on this thread about hanging out with GG's and perhaps that is the best situation for me. It's a process like it is for everyone else here. But I do have support and just need to get my butt in gear to create the best feminine me possible.

[Diane Smith]

Hanging out with other CDs is great for support when you want to have a safe outing, be introduced to interesting places to go while dressed, and so forth. And in the early stages, it's valuable to exchange "technical" tips about how to look better, where to shop, which local stores and services are friendly and which ones to avoid, and such. Once these subjects are exhausted, though, I'm no more likely to be interested in making another crossdresser my friend than any other random stranger. I have felt a lasting connection to a few I've met (and they know who they are because we do, indeed, stay in touch), but the others with whom I don't share any other interests, experiences or just plain good vibes are like any other ship passing in the night. Still, I do continue to go on "safe" organized outings because the experience can be fun in itself, and at this point, I feel like I've become one of the older sisters who can sometimes be helpful to a newcomer. Only a couple of true, lasting friendships have ever developed from all this activity, however, and a lot of times I come home thinking I could have had a better time hanging out with a group of GGs or, in some extreme cases, just going out by myself.

- Diane

[Frédérique]

Do any of you girls have this need to hang out with other Transvestites or CDs and have fun getting en-femme. You know, people who they can relate with your situation. Just for friendship. Most of my friends don't know that I Crossdress and I am actually officially a Transvestite. I take it more than just dressing up. I just feel the need to show off and have fun being en-femme with others. Being in closet all these years is killing me!

First of all, I wish to congratulate you for using the word “transvestite” to describe yourself – well done! Many people around here have a BIG problem with that divisive term, something that has been discussed ad infinitum. I am also officially a transvestite, but I do not feel the need to show off, except to myself, of course. It would be fun to go somewhere with a couple of other transvestites for some femme activity, but I pretty much keep to myself as I try to make myself pretty. Because of where I live, I would have to travel quite a ways to find a sympathetic atmosphere for my (our) kind of alternative pleasure, and getting there would be an adventure in itself. Being in the closet does NOT kill me, in fact holding one’s precious secrets near and dear can be more fun than going out in public to spill the beans for no good reason. If the climate was more to my liking, I would go forth with alacrity, but, until then, I will be true to my “self.”
:battingeyelashes:

[pink femme]

not 4 me. I am lucky enough to have spent time all dressed up in the company of a close GF. She made me feel feminine all day.

[Sarah V]

Let's just say.........YES!!

[marlaNYC]

need? no. desire...yes! :)

[JaytoJillian]

need? no. desire...yes! :)

Cool!!! my boss is talking about a trip to NYC--I'll make sure I go with him and look you up when I get there---gawd I love that city

cheers,


Jill

[Stacey Summer]

Sort of on topic for this thread. Does anyone know of a site or other sort of listing where I could find CD's/TS's in my area? Aside from the obvious dating/swinging/porn sites? Not interested in any of that, just friendship and sharing tips.

[susan54]

Well, no desire at all to hang out with other cross-dressers. I think we have a huge range of variation within our ranks, and apart from the clothes I feel I have very little in common with other CDs, and even there we vary so much. I love my clothes and I love women, I prefer to spend my time with women, no blokes, no matter how they are dressed. I have met with CDs - not a success. It could be them or me or both, but I just have no desire to go there again. If you just shop for clothes, go to beauticians and go to restaurants and hotels very easy to interact only with women. Long may it continue.

[Toni Citara]

I have hung out with CDs, and MtF Pre-Ops, gays, lesbians and bisexuals, straights, whites, blacks, asians, even some people from England!!! EEEK! LOL I will continue to hang out with people that I connect with because I enjoy their friendship. That said, I would like to find more CDs in my area not only to be friends with, but to help me with my CD appearance.

For those that don't want to hang out with a CD - look at it this way... if you didn't know somebody was a crossdresser and you met 'em at a game or shooting pool in a bar, they would be okay for you, right? Well, they are the same person as you are, with the same love for crossdressing. Nobody is saying because you have a male friend that CDs he is going to jump your bones! That mentality is akin to homophobia... afraid to be next to a gay guy because you're scared he will want sex from you. It doesn't work that way.

[michelle64]

never any desire..i have a wonderful GG..thats it for me....seems like all my normal guy friends just want to drink and watch sports..i hate sports and do not drink..so i spend my time working on and old international scout and a few old vintage hodaka dirt bikes i have (if you have NOS parts PM me)..of course applying makeup to my GG and daughters is also a fun hobby...i just have never had any desire to hang with the guys (even other CD's)..all they seem to talk about is degrading women on looks and features and well i just hate that..i vowed over 20 years ago to never be that kind of guy..but it is hard at time with me being a guy...the whole support issue i can understand but my GG knew everything from the first date and well we do everything together.....good luck..but none of this interest me at all..find a wonderful GG and you will never look back

ps: our only rule is simple...nothing is done around the kids...

[5150 Girl]

Yes, it would be nice to find others in my reigon, just so I know I'm not alone

[Annaliese2010]

I'd love to not because I need to just cause it would be fun...waaay fun I'm shore. Easier for me than many others tho...I'm free with nary a concern regarding responsibilities to eenyone on planet Earth. Not that easy to find others like me, m2f lez. Don't like men. In a minority within a minority, I guess.

[NathalieX66]

I hang out with everybody......just don't ask me to come home with you.

If I go out in public, it is me expressing myself as I am.

Making friends with other CD/TG/TS people, I'm talking everyone from the weekend crossdresser to the fully transitioned transsexual, straight, bi, gay, whatever is the best thing I ever did. I learned a lot about me, and other people in the process. Now I feel at peace with myself.

[docrobbysherry]

I have neither the NEED or the DESIRE to go out as Sherry! With anyone! However, I can say for a fact that my time with other girls at the SCC was the MOST FUN I've had in ages! PERIOD!

[fungril]

I wood love to find someone to share this with and talk to.It wood be cool to have a group of friends to dress up with or just one. I am in .S.F.L. if some one know of a group please tell me

[Risque_Christine]

A thread that surprised me for its diversity of opinion and made me think a little. Many of us feel very much alone and isolated, and are comforted by the fact that out there, someplace, are people like "us." But whether you need or want company from other CDs may depend on why you cross dress and where you think you are headed (something I don't know at this point, I admit). And it may also depend on how confident and comfortable you have become being a girl, at least some of the time. For me, when I go out as Christine, I really want to feel and experience life as a woman might and be treated like a lady. That can include anybody who is willing to accept who I would like to be, CD or not. Mostly, it has meant that I feel most comfortable in the company of gay men. So many people in that community (and others, too) have been kind beyond imagining in respecting Christine as a girl-- holding doors, kissing me on the cheek or hand, gallantly hailing taxis. I still find going out alone as Christine daunting. But I have to accept who I am, and take life as it comes.
Christine

[Toni Citara]

Here is another way to look at it... people that belong to "therapy" other groups to help them deal with any type of problem, (alcohol, drugs, rape, abuse, etc.), part of their safety net in life is to have other people that have BTDT and can share guidence and friendship. Why wouldn't any of us that cross dress want to hang with others that share our passions?

I, for one, welcome the friendship and mentorship that will help me grow as a person and to find my own personal happiness.

[marlaNYC]

I'll make sure I go with him and look you up when I get there

@JaytoJillian, you do that! :D lol

[ArleneRaquel]

I go out with the girls about every 2 - 3 weeks, at organized events less often. I would love to go with the ladies more often.

[Piora]

No, I don't have any desire to do that. I'm heavily closeted, with only my daughter aware of my dressing. This forum is as close as I will ever be to 'hanging out' with other cross dressers.