Finally went back to my therapist

[tanyalynn51]

I talked about doing it in previous threads. I knew I had to go to my old therapist to settle some old issues, and then move on. I put together some things, and realized that she hadnt talked to my work, even just to get insurance info straight. What I had overheard at work was someone commenting on some wierd counselor I was supposed to be seeing. I now know where that came from. A coworker had dropped me off at the building my therapist is in after a meeting at work. I didnt think much about it, as there are numerous doctors and stuff there. What I didnt think about was that that same building contains a well known local Christian counselor, known for some really strange methods. Anyway, that all said, I wont be getting any rides there anymore, unless it's from my friend who knows about me. The session went well. It took a while to get caught up, but when we did, she did let me have it a little. She said it wasnt time to come back out of my shell to go just to where I had been before. She gave me some ideas job wise that are similar to what I have gotten from people here, and even some other options I hadnt thought of. She also said I had to tell someone else, for my own sake. Now, that's the hard one. I deal with danger everyday at work, working with the homeless. I have faced danger and death down more times than I count, but I am paralyzed by the thought of rejection by someone if I tell them. I told her this, but did say that I really wanted it deep down too, but it may take some time. Anyway, thanks for reading.

[Nicki S]

I believe that your therapist is correct in the fact that you need to tell more people. Once you start to come out of hiding and let others in on your tender secret, you will feel such a tremendous sense of relief. I really does get easier as you go along. Now that I look back, I wonder why I thought it was so difficult, when in reality it wasn't. Our own minds are our worst enemies.

[Melody Moore]

Yes Steph, you cannot go back to that place that you were in before - that isn't you and it is just going to drive
you to total insanity to keep fighting with this. I believe that Nicki just gave you some very sound advice about the
more people you come out to, the more you sill start to set yourself free. I know this sounds a bit like 'Come on in
the waters fine', but you know there is going to be that initial shock reaction your body goes through when you first
hit the water, but after a little while your body acclimatises to the cooler temperatures and then it brings about a
really refreshing sense of relief - well that is exactly what coming out feels like the more you do it, the easier it all
becomes hun. So keep giving yourself a nice swift kick up the butt and keep pushing yourself to get out of this rut.