Door Opening Etiquette When Dressed???

[Debglam]

Ok, so here is something I never thought about before my little excursion on Friday:

As a guy, I am a gentleman of the “old school” variety and I will rush to open a door for a lady. Well, I had to fight that urge when I was out with my friend so the question is this:

What do two women (GG or otherwise) do when they hit a door at the same time? What do you do?

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Deb, That's something to ponder, My mom would rollover in her grave if I didn't hold a door for a lady.
If I ever go out dressed I will just have to not get in the position where that would happen.

Orchid

[SarahLynn]

Ok, so here is something I never thought about before my little excursion on Friday:

As a guy, I am a gentleman of the “old school” variety and I will rush to open a door for a lady. Well, I had to fight that urge when I was out with my friend so the question is this:

What do two women (GG or otherwise) do when they hit a door at the same time? What do you do?

As I see it you have two options, #1 you both go for the door and whoever gets there first holds the door. #2 You both wait for a gentleman to open the door for you.

Good luck with #2 in todays world but it could happen.

In real life, as I remember seeing this happen, one lady held the door for the two of them, taking turns going through the doors. As I live in the upper mid-west there are usually two sets of doors to every entrance here because of the weather. First lady through the outer door holds the inner door for the second lady then follows her into the establishment.

SarahLynn

[Mikaela]

You can be polite without being chivalrous.
Although I recommend that if it is for an SO who is out with you, that you do the door opening. Holding chairs and such might be a little much.

[AllieSF]

I have run into that situation many times. If I get there first, I usually hold the door open for who ever is behind me. Other times I just go in and hold the door long enough for the next person to get a hold of it. I try to be nice and considerate all the time and that includes the opening the door routine.

[sissystephanie]

I am a crossdresser, but first and foremost I am a man. So I will always hold the door for a GG, regardless of how I am dressed!! It is all in the training you received when growing up!!

[Wendy_Marie]

I'm with Allie on this one...I open it if I arrive there first...But, I try never to be rude and will hold it no matter what for elderly and disabled persons.

[Loni]

first lady there holds the door open. it is only being polite.

remember what comes around will bite you in the "end". ;-)

[Persephone]

The first lady through the door will sometimes hold it for another lady, especially if she is older or disabled, but generally you pass it to the next person, lady or man, and continue on your way.

Hugs,
Persephone.

[Kate Simmons]

One person opening the door for another is a nice gesture regardless of gender presentation.:)

[Genifer Teal]

I was with a TG and she got all upset when I held the door for her. In her opinion, girls don't do that for each other. Maybe one could enter first and sort of hold it open while standing in the door way to prevent it from closing before the next person can grab it. This might be a reasonable compromise. Now everyone's homework is to study this situation in RLF over the next few days and report back their findings.

Gen

[TxKimberly]

What an excellent question because I have had the same concern.
Personally I act pretty much the same - if a woman or an elder is approaching the door at the same time I am, I still open it. I figure thats just good manners regardless of what gender you are.

[erickka]

One person opening the door for another is a nice gesture regardless of gender presentation.:)

I'm with you on this one. It seems that in some places in the U.S., courtesy is a thing of the past.

[DAVIDA]

I was coming out of a restaurant and a lady was coming in.
When she saw me, she smiled and said "Let me hold the door for you!":D
It really made me feel good.:thumbsup:
It was only the second or third time that I had been out dressed.:)

[noeleena]

Hi,

I'll make it easyer for you, i open doors regardless of whos around when i go in to buildings i'll open the door because im stronger than Jos & many of my women friends this is about women ,

The other side is men open doors for me when they are poistioned to do so, men treat myself as a normal woman like any other.
Ill treat others as i like to be treated, so theres no problem , remember many women of our day 1940's through. were not as strong as most men & some of the doors where very hard to open ,

No different with our waggon i open the door for Jos or who ever is with us , & help with belts or what ever is needed, being a woman does not make you a Queen . & im no girle girl .

...noeleena...

[Cynthia Anne]

Being polite is nongender! Sorry but that is the bottom line! Hugs!

[Leslie Langford]

I'm pretty much on the same page as the rest of the respondents here in that it comes down to who gets to the door first, and it is just plain good manners and consideration for others that needs to be the guiding principle here.

But I must say, it still takes some getting used to having a gentleman rush to hold open a door for me when I am out as "Leslie", especially when followed by a "you're welcome, ma'am", or "have a nice day, ma'am'". But oh, what a great rush! ;) :heehee: :thumbsup:

[Chickhe]

No sure what option you have if you don't hold the door... are you going to let it slam in the face of the person behind you? You arn't expected to run over to hold the door like some men do, but you will not make any friends if you let it go.

[Cheryl T]

This came up when my spouse and I began going out together. Automatically I would hold the door for her and she told me it was not the right thing to do because two women wouldn't do that and it would be a "tell" for others. She said if I got there first, just open it and then pass it to her and if she got there first then vice versa. Now when we go we do this all the time.
I will hold it to help someone else, lady with small children, elderly, handicapped, etc, and have had men hold it for me (of course I always smile and say thank you)...and that's such a nice feeling.

[Eryn]

Unfortunately, the rules are not as simple between women as the are between men and women. Men always hold doors, allow women to precede them, but women tend to pass the door along to the woman behind unless there is a good reason for the first woman to hold the door for the others.

[Helen Grandeis]

If the person is elderly or infirm, then you hold the door open no matter how you are dressed. Its a case of doing unto the lease of your brethren.

[JanetK]

That is a hard one for me to get used to when I go out enfemme. As a southern gentleman (ahem), I always open doors for ladies. It is a hard habit to break when I am out as one of those ladies. I often hesitate before approaching doors so I do not arrive at the same time as others. If that is impossible to avoid, I try to do the "open and then hold for others to grab the door" method. The only problem with that is that to me it still seems rude because I am so accustomed to holding the door for others.

[pinto]

This came up when my spouse and I began going out together. Automatically I would hold the door for her and she told me it was not the right thing to do because two women wouldn't do that and it would be a "tell" for others. She said if I got there first, just open it and then pass it to her and if she got there first then vice versa. Now when we go we do this all the time.
I will hold it to help someone else, lady with small children, elderly, handicapped, etc, and have had men hold it for me (of course I always smile and say thank you)...and that's such a nice feeling.

That's interesting and it might happen to me to if i would have the chance to go out dressed with my wife - unfortunately we don't do this. Anyway one lady opening the door for another one the same age indicates a little bit subordination, doesn't it?