Be Careful what you Wish For!

[BridalBoy]

So, my wife of seven years always knew I was a CD. She knew about my lingerie and for a long time she even let me wear it. She was totally against me going any further than that though. So, I for about the last 4 years, I have secretly playing with bridal stuff. I know, not a smart thing to do if this is the woman I love. But, there are OTHER problems in our mariage...more on that in a moment. Anyway, during this whole time I sometimes wished I never gotten married, and I would have been free to have what ever I wanted in the house. I would have been happy with relationships that came and went, with my CD in the background...Well, it turns out that soon we will no longer be man/wife. CD'ing is not the route cause of our splitting up though. We have had some long conversations on what we were REALLY thinking all these years. Long story short, this is a completly MUTAL break-up. We are even still in the same house until she finds a place. Weird thing is, we are actaully getting along better!

Also, she found my bridal side. She saw some photos on my computer (DOH). At first, I felt she used this evidence as the main reason for wanting a divorce. But, she and I have finnaly come to terms with our relationship and we learned that we both were not really happy. So, now its all out on the table, so to speak. And the weird thing is, we have had long talks about my CD'ing! Its strange, but I think we SHOULD have been freinds, instead of mates. We are even planning on still being around for each other.

Anyway, I guess I got what I wanted. But it came at a cost. At first I was really upset, but after our coversations, we BOTH feel really good about it! What are your thaughts???

[NicoleScott]

I get what you're saying. My ex-wife and I had a very harmonious split. We were pretty good roommates but not so good marriage mates. She even suggeted that we stay roommates (housemates actually) after the divorce. Seriously considered for financial reasons, but we ended up with separate places. After the divorce, we went out for dinner (our first date? haha). I guess the reason for the smooth split is that we both wanted it to be smooth, uncomplicated, and mutually respectful. Sometimes divorces are best for both in the long run - too bad they all can't be nice. Best wishes.

[kimdl93]

lots of marriages end for lots of different reasons. Its survivable, and in cases like yours, probably better for both parties. Best of luck to both of you.

[docrobbysherry]

I think marriage is an obsolete convention that does more HARM than GOOD to relationships! Unless u have, or r planning to have, kids.

Otherwise, for nearly every situatuon u can name or imagine, marriage just COMPLICATES THINGS!

Yeah, been there, done that ONCE! And, I learned my lesson!

[BridalBoy]

Thanks for the replies. Tonight, we talked even more about my bridal stuff. We were actually lying on "our" bed discussing what it was about bridal stuff that I liked. We talked for a couple of hours about not only my gowns, but other things in our relationship that went wrong. The best part was, that this whole time, I was wearing my pink panties and a nighty! She went on to say that now that it was all "out" she no longer felt that she could hold it against me. She even said that for the remaing time she is here (another two weeks, then she moves out) she had no problem with me walking around in my lingerie (probably becuase she is used to it anyway). She did ask that I kindly keep the wedding gowns out of sight until she was gone. I don't get it. I thaught divorces were supposed to be bitter and sad, at least thats the way they are in the movies! It sounds weird, but maybe splitting up was the best thing for us!

[Veronica Lacey]

Good to read that there is peace in your mind about how life is moving for you at this time. You likely wished that it could all have simply worked and I think there is nothing wrong with that. Yet because you can still be friends then that is worth a great deal as well, yes?

Odd. Hollywood just does not seem to be a good measure for real life emotion and drama. Those intangible feelings that cannot be caught on film can have a way of making life so much worse or so much better.

Hope that life continues to improve for you both!

[ReineD]

She did ask that I kindly keep the wedding gowns out of sight until she was gone. I don't get it. I thaught divorces were supposed to be bitter and sad, at least thats the way they are in the movies! It sounds weird, but maybe splitting up was the best thing for us!

I think that divorces are bitter or sad when couples feel as if they are losing something, even if it is a dream of what might have been. Maybe you both have other priorities now and there isn't much to grieve. Maybe you let each other go a long time ago, or maybe as others have said, the two of you were never meant to be romantic partners. You did say that many times in the last four years you wished for just casual relationships so that you could be free to crossdress at will.

I'm sorry it didn't work out, but it sounds as if ending the marriage is the best move for you both and I'm glad you are moving on so easily. Now you can spend as much time as you like exploring your femininity and your ex can find someone who will be more compatible with her.

[LilSissyStevie]

I don't get it. I thaught divorces were supposed to be bitter and sad...

It ain't over yet! Just sayin'....