Help me fast please

[JennyA]

I have been taking herbal hormones , gone kinda nutty with them. right now my right leg is itching really bad and is really hot, i think it's a blood clot. what can i do right now to help myself. should i soak in a cold bath, im really hot

[Eryn]

If you think you have a blood clot, you need the emergency room, ASAP.

[chloe23]

You need to get that checked out right away, blood clot serious matter.

[Niya W]

My advice. Take to asprin and call 911.

[JennyA]

im back and safe. what a crazy night. its one good reason to not do what im doing and circumvent the system. the only reason im not with a doctor is because i have no money. so instead i have been doing it herbally, i shoplift the stuff i need and experiment on myself. i know it is dangerous. i am playing with fire, im dont know what to do.

[Melody Moore]

Wow Jenny,

I have said previously that you have worried me, but now you worry me even more!

First of all please understand that I really do feel for you hun because it is
far too obvious gender transition is something you really desperately want.

However, the path you have chosen isn't a good one and I really urge you to have a good think
about how you are going to proceed from here. Shoplifting is really not on and I think you know
that. I am not going to lecture you about that, however I think you really want to think about
what could really go wrong if you are caught. I would hate to even think how hard life can be for
a person like us being put in a male prison, and I really doubt that they will give you hormones in
there anyway. So is this something you think is really worth all this risk, or what are the alternatives?

I have been chatting to a few people about this matter since you posted your story here to see if
there are ways that someone who is living a lot closer to you can offer you any assistance. So
expect someone to get in touch with you soon on Facebook. I think you will get along really well
with this girl who is around your own age and started off the same way you did, but is on proper
hormone therapy now and doesn't have to pay a whole lot for it. So maybe she has some advice
that I hope might help. I am also going to send you another link to a private transgender group on
Facebook where you might be able to also get some more help. So don't be afraid to ask for help
and advice over there, they really are a great bunch of people. Good luck!

[JennyA]

gosh thanks. i know i am being bad , thank you for any help you can give. i don't want to be going around breaking the law everyday and then when im not taking crazy herbal pills that, while changing my body, can also kill me. i know myself enough to know that im still going to self medicate until i figure my life out and thank you for trying to connect me with people. i am lost, in general my mood is fantastic and outlook on life sunny. i just need stability, a steady job, FOOD , a support web. i always land on my feet, but i dont like rolling the dice all the time either. at least this craziness and living on the edge is giving me some much needed strength, attitude, and self confidence.

[Hephaestus]

I took herbal stuff for a short while, and though it seemed to create some results, it could have been a placebo effect... Later, when I started taking hormones under a doctors supervison, it was a big difference. I'd say quit risking getting caught and jailed for herbal junk, and do everything you can to get on real hormones! Good luck, I know it's really hard being where you are.

[Stephenie S]

Yeah. I think Hephie is right. Herbals are problematic at best. It's really dumb to steal for herbal hormones. They don't work, hon. They just don't. And to risk going to prison for the nonexistent benefit herbals will give you is lame, lame, lame. Don't do it.

Do you have ANY idea what happens to pretty boys in prison? I do. It's not worth the risk.

S

[Melody Moore]

Yeah, herbals medications (especially stealing them) are just not worth the
risk for the very little to no result that you are most likely to get from them.

[JennyA]

So I went to the ER. I wasn't having a heart attack, another freaking panic attack, a bad one too. I think being 2 days away from homelessness is messing with me, and the herbs can't be helping. I'm alive, doing well, not quite, but im breathing.

[JennyA]

What I'm kinda worried about is that I've been through hell the past few months and at the end of my rope. Not in a suicidal way, that thought will never enter my mind, the world is too glorious. But by end of my rope I mean when I'm out in public if someone messes with me I'm going to snap and physically attack them. I had a car drive by a yell "faggot queerball". i was in the middle of an intersection. I turned around started to stare them down "what the F did you say?!' then I started to walk towards them. the girl driving gave me a look like 'please don't' and they sped off.

I mean, will it be such a horrible thing if I lay someone out after they are being a complete A hole and deserve it. I want to teach someone a lesson.

[Melody Moore]

Act on your impulses here Jenny and I am afraid that it will be you who is learning a lesson. Do you know how
many people are sitting in jails around the world because they wanted to 'teach someone a lesson?' It is far
too easy to kill someone. If you want to teach them a real lesson, then rise above that and be nice and it is
amazing how people get a huge wake up call by the fact that you were really nice about it while they acted
like complete dicks. So my advice is this...

[JennyA]

yeah, that does make sense. i think i'm just letting my emotions get out whack, i've always had good control over em, i have to reign myself in. I really don't think I would ever start a fight with someone, maybe i need to start playing a sport or take some aerobic classes when i get on my feet.

thanks for the advice Melody.

[Melody Moore]

Jenny,

Get yourself under therapy on onto proper hormone treatment and all that angst that you are experiencing will
disappear. This is why herbal alternatives never cut it, they just cause more problems for those who are taking
them and there are girls like Inna here that can also testify and tell you about their bad experience with herbals.