A little farther "out"

[kimdl93]

Well, it was inevitable, I suppose. This morning I ran a few errands and bumped into one of my next door neighbors at the supermarket. Its a really big HEB and I have shopped there quite a few times w/o everseeing anyone I knew. Well, not today.

As I walked towards the store, my neighbor, a married woman in her early 30's, emerged from her car, just a few spaces nearer the door. She saw me right away and with a big smile, said "Hi Kim!"

I had no option but to greet her in return and walk with her towards the store. For a moment, I could barely speak, but I calmed down when I realized she seemed quite accepting! As we chatted, I learned that she had already seen me en femme a few times - fetching mail, moving the sprinkler and had backing down the drive away. We talked a little about it - the usual questions about why, how long, how my wife felt about it. Then she said, "well, I think you look great and I'm glad you can be yourself." Then she gave me a hug and we went about our shopping.

All in all, it was a great morning. Besides the surprisingly positive encounter with my neighbor, I dropped off a package at the Post Office, was greeted by name at the Starbucks a little later. I did get one rather nasty look from a middleaged man working on his laptop at Starbucks...but so what. It really does get easier and feel much more normal to go out with each passing day.

[Diane Elizabeth]

Yes it does get easier the more one goes out. I wnet grocery shopping today, en femme, and didn't let anyone bother me. I may have had a few stares. I don't know and don't care about them. Its all about confidence. I am a fine one to talk about confidence. Even with it I still get scared. Kind of like the movie "Invasion of the Body Snatchers". They would out someone by pointing and screaming in a loud high pitch. Hasn't happened yet. Like you said Kim just someone gives you a dirty look. Congrats with your neighbor.

[Tina B.]

Very cool, but how did she know your feminine name? Had she talked to your wife?
Tina B.

[kimdl93]

Tina - my given name happens to be Kim...I guess mom knew something when she chose my name!

[kimdl93]

I dont know what HEB stands for - its a large grocery chain here in Tx. And you are right...although its not the closest grocery to our place, its probably the busiest. As for bumping into people, I've pretty much come to grips with the fact that it will happen from time to time. I've just decided that I'm not letting that keep me housebound anymore ;)

[DonnaT]

HEB is a supermarket chain in Texas and Mexico.

[Kittyagain]

Kim that made me smile since I knew you had to feel so good after the trip to the store. You are so true to yourself girl.:)

Kitty

[kimdl93]

Thanks, Kitty. It does feel good. I might be kidding myself, but it seems to me that most of the people I encounter are really nice and very positive. Their reactions, in aggregate, have elevated my opinion of people in general.

[Julie Denier]

Congratulations! BTW, HEB stands for the initials of the founder, H.E. Butt. The Butt family still owns and manages the company. Glad I could get to the bottom of that for you ;)

[kimdl93]

This is a bit off topic, but here in Houston is a famous mansion owned at one time by Ima Hogg. Some of these texas familes could be cruel :)

[*Vanessa*]

Neat story Kim - and the "with each passing day" was a pun right :heehee:
Really I can't see you having any problem, anywhere.

[linda allen]

Tina - my given name happens to be Kim...I guess mom knew something when she chose my name!

That "gender neutral" name has it's advantages, doesn't it.

[kimdl93]

That "gender neutral" name has it's advantages, doesn't it.

I guess - although I'm not sure its particularly "gender neutral". Everyone assumes its a girl's name. I don't know if my name influenced my gender identification, probably not. But it seems that throughout my life, people felt that the ambiguity suited me.

[Piora]

Well, it was inevitable, I suppose. This morning I ran a few errands and bumped into one of my next door neighbors at the supermarket. Its a really big HEB and I have shopped there quite a few times w/o everseeing anyone I knew. Well, not today.

As I walked towards the store, my neighbor, a married woman in her early 30's, emerged from her car, just a few spaces nearer the door. She saw me right away and with a big smile, said "Hi Kim!"

I had no option but to greet her in return and walk with her towards the store. For a moment, I could barely speak, but I calmed down when I realized she seemed quite accepting! As we chatted, I learned that she had already seen me en femme a few times - fetching mail, moving the sprinkler and had backing down the drive away. We talked a little about it - the usual questions about why, how long, how my wife felt about it. Then she said, "well, I think you look great and I'm glad you can be yourself." Then she gave me a hug and we went about our shopping.
What a fantastic response! Oh, stories like that are SO good to read! If the neighbour had been a man, I think there's a much higher possibility that you would not have received such a warm greeting. Or a greeting at all. Your neighbour sounds like a very accepting and good person.

Happy for you!

[kimdl93]

If the neighbour had been a man, I think there's a much higher possibility that you would not have received such a warm greeting. Or a greeting at all. Your neighbour sounds like a very accepting and good person.

Happy for you!

I would tend to agree with you Piora. Most of my interactions with me (en femme) have been ....uncomfortable, but civil. I've had a couple of good conversations, but most of the time guys shy away from eye contact and move on. That's ok with me.

Last week I ran out to the mail (fully en femme in wig, red top and jeans) just as one of my mail neighbors was aproaching from up the street to do my yard work. I don't know what his reaction was, but the lawn was mowed and pine needles all blown away... I guess he either didn't recognize me or didn't care.

[Tammy V]

Did she already know your female name?

[Eryn]

Cool story. It's pretty hard to get far enough away to not bump into people. My wife and I were shopping at an outlet mall 50 miles from home (in urban SoCal!) and she encountered a co-worker. Luckily the co-worker didn't know either my male or female selves so my wife and I just shopped separately until the coast was clear.

I don' t worry about any of my drab acquaintances recognizing Eryn, but if they recognize my wife they would certainly look closely at her tall girlfriend.

[Piora]

This is a bit off topic, but here in Houston is a famous mansion owned at one time by Ima Hogg. Some of these texas familes could be cruel :)
Didn't she have a sister that was named "Ura" as well? Oh, really - I'm serious! Yes, talk about cruel.

[Hotscot]

Wow..great stories. No-0ne really knows me in my town and I live in the countryside, two acres, with a wall around it.
Take Care
Alanna

[Barbara Dugan]

Wow...if you are talking about the Central Market by I-10, that is one big and busy store. I shop there sometimes

[Kim_Bitzflick]

Too cool. I'm glad it went well.

[PretzelGirl]

As for bumping into people, I've pretty much come to grips with the fact that it will happen from time to time. I've just decided that I'm not letting that keep me housebound anymore ;)

I love this attitude! I am there with you. I was kidding with a friend as we went out three times in a row and all three times we ran into someone I worked with (I went unnoticed). Then I went out with my daughter and she said that she always runs into my niece when she goes out. On cue my niece, nephew, and their 2 kids walk in and my daughter panics. I think we (CDers that is) get a calm once this happens a lot. Wasn't a big deal.... to me anyway. :heehee:


I did get one rather nasty look from a middleaged man working on his laptop at Starbucks...but so what.

It was probably gas.

[Cynthia Anne]

If your neighbor wants to move I could sure use a neighbor like her!ha,ha! Nice to hear you had a great day! Hugs!

[Diane Smith]

I get nasty looks from the curmudgeons at Starbucks no matter what I'm wearing. It wouldn't be the same without them.

- Diane

[marlacd]

If I could hit the lottery, then everyone would know that I was a CD.

[linda allen]

I guess - although I'm not sure its particularly "gender neutral". Everyone assumes its a girl's name. I don't know if my name influenced my gender identification, probably not. But it seems that throughout my life, people felt that the ambiguity suited me.

I worked with a guy named Kim for several years. I also knew a guy named Dana for a few years. And I know a married couple, Carey and Carey. And then there's Pat and Chris.

[michelleddg]

Circumstance lobs lemons to Kim. Kim makes lemonade, happy ending, well done! Hugs, Michelle

[Tina B.]

Kim, I think mom did you a favor, it's nice just needing one name.
Tina B.

[KerryLynn]

All in all, it was a great morning. Besides the surprisingly positive encounter with my neighbor, I dropped off a package at the Post Office, was greeted by name at the Starbucks a little later. I did get one rather nasty look from a middleaged man working on his laptop at Starbucks...but so what. It really does get easier and feel much more normal to go out with each passing day.

Just remember if the middle aged man had any real life he wouldn't be on a laptop at Starbucks. I saw this as I write it from my laptop at Hardee's :P
Don't stress about it. Remember if you give them the satisfaction of watching you get aggravated they've won. Remember. "To thy own self"

[Jorja]

Well, it was inevitable, I suppose. This morning I ran a few errands and bumped into one of my next door neighbors at the supermarket. Its a really big HEB and I have shopped there quite a few times w/o everseeing anyone I knew. Well, not today.

As I walked towards the store, my neighbor, a married woman in her early 30's, emerged from her car, just a few spaces nearer the door. She saw me right away and with a big smile, said "Hi Kim!"

I had no option but to greet her in return and walk with her towards the store. For a moment, I could barely speak, but I calmed down when I realized she seemed quite accepting! As we chatted, I learned that she had already seen me en femme a few times - fetching mail, moving the sprinkler and had backing down the drive away. We talked a little about it - the usual questions about why, how long, how my wife felt about it. Then she said, "well, I think you look great and I'm glad you can be yourself." Then she gave me a hug and we went about our shopping.

All in all, it was a great morning. Besides the surprisingly positive encounter with my neighbor, I dropped off a package at the Post Office, was greeted by name at the Starbucks a little later. I did get one rather nasty look from a middleaged man working on his laptop at Starbucks...but so what. It really does get easier and feel much more normal to go out with each passing day.

Seriously, you need to be careful. Soon you will drop off the edge if you keep going further and further out. :eek::heehee: