Your opinions, please.

[Lawren]

It seems to me that a lot of Cds are coming out to their GGs/SOs and friends lately and are finding acceptance and support. Are we seeing a new trend here? If so, is it just a trend within this forum or is it more widespread? Speaking for myself, I would love to see it the "Ladies Lib" movement so we all can go out enfemme.

[Billijo49504]

Could it be, that we are coming out to people we are fairly sure will except us as we are. A SO has a lot invested in a relationship. And most don't want to do a life style change. And our REAL friends will except us base on many years of friendship. Sometime it just takes a while for the new person in you, to be the same person they knew, but just in a different package. I hope you understand what I'm trying to say.

[Stephanie Kay]

I would wager a guess that most GG/SO's are willing to listen and accept the behavior of their loved one. I think that the reason CDs don't reveal themselves is more their own thoughts and fears of what might happen. The CD does not want to trust his wife with what he thinks is shameful, devastating information. But that is perhaps dismissing the woman as weak. My experience in speaking with a lot of CDs who have revealed themselves to loved ones is that the anger and sadness that the SO has when told is due to not feeling trusted with a significant emotional part of their loving husband (it was in may case!). Most women are much stronger emotionally than men. Sure, they express their emotions more (crying, anger, loving, caring,etc), but that doesn't mean they are weak! As most of us girls who are comfortable with our femininity now know, it feels good to cry, right?

So I think the acceptance by GG/SOs has always been there for the asking. It's the asking that is the hardest part. N'est ce pas?:)

[GypsyKaren]

I am lucky because my wife had enough faith in me to see that I'm the same person who always loves her. She looked into my eyes and saw the real me. It's because of her love and support that I was able to accept things myself, and she has helped me grow.

GypsyKaren

[melissacd]

Well speaking as a CD whose wife did not throw out the red carpet my experience has not been a positive one. I wish that it was. I was in hiding for many years, eventually the cross dressing was in the open, the reaction was totally negative and there seemed no way to get past that and so I went back into hiding. I am now at the point where I want to come out of hiding but I do not want to have to go through the same experience again.

I would love nothing more than to have my SO accept this part of me because I feel that being in hiding is not healthy for the relationship and I also feel that being in denial of all of who I am is not healthy for the relationship either. How can you feel that they are your soul mate if they cannot accept all of your soul?

[TGMarla]

Bingo, Melissa! Right on the money there. We spoke of this before. My cat's out of the bag, so to speak, but the cat and the bag have been put back in the closet. *Sigh* Perhaps one of these days.......

[melissacd]

MarlaTG,

Girl, do I ever wish that we lived closer to each other! You sound like someone who I could be fast friends with. There is nothing like knowing another who has a similar problem with whom you can cry in your beer with. Men need this support just as much as women do.

I have made one local CD friend recently. This person has been a joy to be able to talk to about so many things and while he has had SO related problems in the past, he now has an SO that accepts if not fully understands cross dressing. I am envious of that situation and hope that someday I will be able to say the same.

This has been my first ever experience meeting face to face with another who is into cross dressing. I never knew how great it could be to have someone to talk with who understands and is understanding.

We have met many times for coffee and talked about so many things that are a common interest (including CDing) and I know that I would love to have more friends like that. I can see from some other things that I have read that there is nothing like having a group of like minded individuals who can get together and just enjoy being themselves together.

Thanks for your kind thoughts and wonderful support. Please feel free to PM with me if you want to talk more about our common problem.

Huggs
Melissa

[Foot_Fetish]

Wow...this is beautiful.

[Phoebe Reece]

I think that the trend you are seeing is a result of more and more CD's reaching a level of self-acceptance. Searching out others and communicating in a meaningful way through this forum or through support groups is causing more of our sisters to realize that crossdressing is not something you need to be ashamed of. Once you realize that you can actually be proud of who and what you are, the confidence to confide in a S.O. begins to follow. It's a shame that all the stories do not have happy endings, but more of them seem to turn out better than one might expect.