Law of attraction

[Kate Simmons]

How does it make you feel if, say you go out to a club or a function dressed to the nines and begin attracting the attention of other males, possibly to the point where they approach you and want to talk or buy you a drink? You are emulating a woman by doing what you are doing, so what would you do about it or how would you handle it? I hear many say they get annoyed when guys hit on them but aren't they inviting that very thing the way they are dressed? How have you handled such a situation and how have you proceeded?:)

[kimdl93]

In my dreams. Ha! Only at a club catering to the visually impaired!

That being said, I have had a number of women approach me and buy me drinks, clearly recognizing that I was a MtF Cdr...perhaps out of curiosity. I accepted the drinks graciously and had some nice conversations, but I'm not in the market...ie monogamous and married.

[Aprilrain]

isn't that the point of going to clubs?

[Marcia Blue]

I have been aproached by males when dressed. Must be great make-up and poor light.
I just tell them I am married, and only like women.
I really hate the ones that just stand next to you and stare, must be mute, and really creeps me out.

[candykowal]

The time I recieved a cat call while driving was a WOW moment!
I thought it was a great compliment.
I don't go to clubs, yet, as Candy for just that reason...I think saying I am married and I'm not interested is enough.
Gosh Marcia, if they stood there and stared....I would call them over and let them know I am a hetrosexual CDer!
That might make them turn red and walk away!

[msginaadoll]

Well If its a club I sure dont mind talking, after all Im there to be social. If they really want to buy me a drink thats fine, however thats all they are buying.

[Chickhe]

Last halloween, my wife and I were chatted up...I have to say, I didn't really clue in at first, but what I remember was being totally bored to death listening to this guy talk (he thought I was female for sure)... I guess I felt like a woman and I was only thinking, how can I tell this guy to shove off without offending him. This year, my wife let an admirer dance with me (he knew I was CDing)...that was odd...really weird having him stare in to my eyes while I was trying to look anywhere but his!...I just told him , nice talking, gotta go. A few years ago before I felt really secure with myself I would have had a problem with it, but I know I am a straight male who just CDs for fun...so, to me its just a curiosity so I'll play along until they get too personal...then I'll break it to them. My attitude is almost disbelief that someone would be attracted to my female image and I find that very funny for some reason....

[Piora]

It could never happen to me - I'm closeted. But I think if I could imagine myself in that position, what I would probably do is say, in the deepest, butchest male voice that I could muster....

"Sure, Buddy.... siddown, take a load off....get ya a beer?" :heehee:

[Kim_Bitzflick]

I've only been to a club once while dressed & no one talked to me....BUT...One time I was at a movie & a guy asked if we could go for coffee. I handled it like any female, I politly said no, thank you.

Do I present as female to attract male attention? No, I do it for me to enjoy being a female.

Does it annoy me? I only had it happen once so I don't know.

[Jennifer529]

I have never been in that situation,but if I was i'd just say thanks but i'm not interested/avaliable.I would be very flattersd tho :)

[Eryn]

Luckily being in my 50s, tall, and wearing a femme wedding ring seems to keep the wolves at bay. :)

[DebbieL]

I've been out a number of times and been approached by men pretty regularly. Sometimes they don't realize that the reason that I'm the sexiest girl in the place, is because I'm not a girl. Others figure it out but want to check me out anyway. I'll dance with them and talk with them, but I don't let them buy me drinks or anything that would imply a debt owed. I also don't drink alcohol, which makes it much easier to make sure that I don't lose control.

When someone, male or female, shows interest, I am always flattered and consider it a complement. Most of the time I can listen to the man, find out what he is looking for, and let him know that I'm not really what he wants. I've only had one situation where I really seriously considered taking a guy up on his offer. He was handsome, thin, and he was riding a Harley. He had just parked in front of the gay bar, and asked me if I'd like a ride. I was wearing a short skirt, knee high boots, and off-block hose, as well as a leader biker jacket. I was sooo ready to go, but very suddenly the flashback of almost puking while giving a guy a blow job just killed the moment. Although, if he had told me he wanted to tie me up and **** me, I might have gone for it. ;-).

There are so very few men I've found attractive, and so many women I've found attractive, that I just haven't been able to appreciate the charms of a man, especially knowing that he would probably want me to be completely undressed before having sex, which totally kills it for me.

I can really enjoy the admiration of other men, be they gay, straight, or unknown. At the same time, I know there is a big difference between a compliment or gentle touch on the dance floor, and trying being in the arms of a man and out of control of the situation and feeling very uncomfortable. I don't want to lead a man on, letting him think that he has a chance of taking me home. Many times, both the men and women who hit on me, end up getting lots of positive attention from boys and/or girls who appreciate what they are appreciating, and are more than happy to give them what they want.

Even when I didn't dress in public, many men would "bird dog" me. They would look for girls who were trying to make a pass at me, and then move in and offer them the services of a "Real Man". In many cases, the women were actually trying to pick me up BECAUSE they knew that the alpha males would come out of the woodwork to "rescue" her. I also found the same dynamic in gay bars. There would be guys who would hit on me, knowing that I would NOT be going home with them, but knowing that going after me would bring out the guys who were looking for a guy who could go for a guy/girl like me.

The only time I got a bit freaked, was when this man, who was NOT attractive to me at all, started following me all around Walgreens. It seemed like every time my attention lapsed while I was shopping, this guy would be inches away, and would start trying to fondle me. Eventually, I barked at him in my lowest Bass voice, hoping that would scare him off, but he smiled, asked me if I'd like to go on a date, and I made it clear that I was not interested.

There have also been a few times, when I was dressed in my black leather, that men would mistake me for a professional dominatrix. I think the lowest offer I got was $700 for a session. Fortunately, I didn't need the money at the time.

[sandra-leigh]

I've had two offers, earlier on in my going out, when I was not nearly as relaxed or polished as I am now; on the other hand I was still wearing wigs back in those days.

The first time I was approached, the guy knew I was male, and was hoping I was gay. I talked to him, but eventually I just bored him away. :-)

The second time, the guy was too drunk to know or care whether I was male or female, attractive or not.

These days, the few times I get hit on or "hinted at", it is almost always Dominant females! (Truly. Our venues and events and committees overlap, so I talk amicably to the D/s and BSDM people. D/s doesn't happen to work for me, but it is still nice to be asked.)

[Dixie]

The first time I went out in public was on Halloween. We, my now ex-wife and I, went to several of the Halloween parties in town. At one party my wife was dancing with a friend of ours and while I was watching her this guy comes up to me. He is looking me up from head to toe and says "Oh hell yeah!" then winks at me. In a slightly deeper voice than is normal for me I just looked at him and said "I don't think so." He had the most shocked look on his face then stammers "Uh, yeah me neither." then he hurries off. I laughed I got a kick out of that. :)

[connie23]

Hi,
I don't really know. At some level, I hope that a really cute guy will think I am attractive and will want to dance with me. On the other hand, I am pretty sure I am heterosexual and won't want any kind of sexual encounter. It is just so confusing???
I was at a fetish club once and a guy came up to me and complimented me on my boots and my outfit. I was really flattered but, really nervous. He asked me to dance and I did -- it was special.
Anyway, I think we should be free to be who we are.
Connie

[Kate Simmons]

There are many guys who enjoy watching me dance as sometimes I'm the only one on the dance floor because I just plain love to dance and am not squeamish dancing in front of others in the least. This is at the LGBT club. Many times they come over to talk when I'm at the table, buy me a drink and dance with me.It may be for some of the reasons Debbie mentioned but it doesn't matter. I just go with the flow and see what develops. I'm not afraid of who I am or my own sexuality in any case. Life is too short not to enjoy it.:)

[rebekkadg]

Not been in that situation as I haven't actually gone out anywhere (unless you count my back patio and even then I was nervous about that lol). I have tried to imagine it though and I am sure I would like having guys admire me. Who doesn't like to feel pretty, beautiful, and sexy? But beyond that I would find some polite way of dismissing them by telling them I am married, sorry I only go for girls, or something of the like. I wouldn't let on that I am not a natural woman though because I would feel really bad making them uncomfortable in that way---unless they are just really annoying or rude.

[NV Susan]

If I'm at a club or saloon and a guy buys me a drink I'm flattered. If he wants to sit and talk that's great. If he wants to take me to his hotel room..........well I'll never tell, a girl has to protect her reputation you know!

[Cheryl T]

Wow...I could only wish...lol.
I would be rather flattered that all my efforts had been recognized by someone if they chose to make that known. That has never happened to me but had it happened I would tell them how flattered I was but that I was not interested as I am married and straight.

[christina s]

Have fun with it . I mean there's no point in getting annoyed with them unless they're being too aggressive (then if there cute i would have more fun with it .

[DonnaT]

I've had guys sit and talk with me, but none have ever offered to buy me a drink or anything. I figure it's just like talking to anyone else wanting to strike up a conversation, whether dressed enfemme or not. I don't dance, so if I had been asked it would have been easy enough to decline. But if I did dance, I see no harm in having fun on the dance floor.

[Jilmac]

I haven't been hit on yet, maybe it's because I only dress to the 8 1/4.

[t-girlxsophie]

Just go with the flow Talk is free,so is the drink if he's buying,as long as he knows the state of play beforehand

Sophie