A CD's Dream Come True

[skirtsuit]

Hello All,
I had a great day out & about last Wed. including meeting a very nice shoe SA at the center city Macy's. As she was helping me we struck up a conversation and it turns out she's a dress designer and former boutique owner. We exchanged cards and I called her today and asked if she'd like to join me for coffee sometime. Boy, I was almost as nervous as a teenager! She said she'd love to and I'll be meeting her Tues for her lunch hour at Macy's. Yipee!

I was already planning on going out en femme Tuesday, so the pressure to look good is on! I think I might get a makeover right before as the makeup is right next to the shooes. I don't know if it's a date or just getting to know a new friend, but getting to know a dress designer is a personal dream come true.

What to Wear?

The Scratch Acid show tonight and a CD date should make this week a real banger!

Best,
SS

BTW, if you'd like to see what I was wearing Wed., check out the first outfit on my Flikr feed, userid: anntaylorfan
http://www.flickr.com/photos/40793767@N07/

[S. Lisa Smith]

Sounds like a wonderful opportunity! We you en femme when you met her? If not, I am confident that she will be impressed when she meets the real you! You have a number of beautiful outfits!!

[connie23]

Wow,
That is a great opportunity. I can't believe you had the guts to call her and ask her out to coffee. On the other hand, after looking at your pictures on flikr, I see that you look great and you have a winning smile. No wonder she took you up on your offer. Maybe someday I could reach out too.
Thanks for giving me something to dream about,
Connie

[AllieSF]

Congratulations. It sounds like a wonderful opportunity to make a new friend. I wouldn't consider it a date, more like two women having coffee or lunch just to talk. Regarding getting a makeover, that sounds terrific but really not necessary when meeting her. I have seen your pics and they all look good and you should be proud of your makeup skills, unless you don't like them. I was going to suggest that you take your camera, but I think that might not be a good idea. How often do people want pics when meeting for the first or second time. It may give off the wrong message. Treat the meeting just as that and enjoy her company and I bet that she will be more than happy to discuss her career and passions for fashion.

[skirtsuit]

Thanks everyone, yes I was en femme when we met. I had a great day and she was a big part of it, so I started our phone conversation by thanking her for helping make my day so great. I got a few nice comments from strangers that day, so I was feeling pretty also. I went to the thrift shop in the old gatehouse at the Pennsylvania Hospital and was treated just like one of the girls. It's great to be able to take short vacations from myself. I try and look my best and people seem to appreaciate it. Blend in? forgeddaboutit!!!!

I will definately bring my camera, mostly so she can take some pics of me!

Thanks Again,
SS / CD and lovin' it

[Presh GG]

Just my Opinion, but I would feel funny, devalued if my new friend , On my lunch hour , over coffee pulled out a camera and asked me to take HER picture.

The purpose of meeting is to get to know HER , not to add to your porfolio. Save that for a walk in the park or sometime " down the road" . And of course make the photo takeing equal.
That is if you want to go out again.

My opinion,
Presh GG

[S. Lisa Smith]

Just my Opinion, but I would feel funny, devalued if my new friend , On my lunch hour , over coffee pulled out a camera and asked me to take HER picture.

The purpose of meeting is to get to know HER , not to add to your porfolio. Save that for a walk in the park or sometime " down the road" . And of course make the photo takeing equal.
That is if you want to go out again.

My opinion,
Presh GG

I agree with this great advice!!

[NathalieX66]

Take it slow.
I met a girl at a halloween bash and she chatted me up all night and was really into my litle girl costume, we exchanged emails, then she emailed me, I responded but I have not heard back from her.

Otherwise enjoy the moment.

[ReineD]

The purpose of meeting is to get to know HER , not to add to your porfolio. Save that for a walk in the park or sometime " down the road" . And of course make the photo takeing equal.

I agree with Presh, unless of course this GG offers to take your picture.

Another consideration: I don't know the dynamics between you, but I'm guessing you each felt a connection. I'm assuming she knows you are a genetic male? If so, there is a chance that she will see your request to have coffee as a romantic overture. If you, on the other hand, only wish to have a platonic gal-pal friendship, this could produce awkward moments. Just food for thought.

If you're interested in her romantically and she returns the feelings, then it's all systems go! :)

You mention feeling as nervous as a teenager and under particular pressure to look good when you meet. Do you mind if I ask why you feel this way? I think I just don't understand what is the CD Dream you mention, if it is just being one of the girls, or the potential of being on a lesbian date? Just curious. :)

[Rachel Morley]

Just my Opinion, but I would feel funny, devalued if my new friend , On my lunch hour , over coffee pulled out a camera and asked me to take HER picture.
Yes ... a very good point. You only just met her. I think you should just hang out and talk and get to know one another better. Forget about anything else except bonding on an emotional level. (that's my 2 cents).

[skirtsuit]

The purpose of meeting is to get to know HER

I couldn't agree more, that's the main reason I'm so excited to have lunch with her. I felt like we hit it off immeadiately, that I could have talked to her all afternoon. She's a bi-coastal (San Fran & Philly) dress designer who has made dresses for CD/drag queens in the past. I don't know if she knows any or knows about us fetish CDs, but I was dressed when we met so she knows a bit about me already.

The camera comment was somewhat flippant; I would only ask about pics if we were out in a park or something or if maybe the subject of photography came up. Flikr has become a sort of video blog as I post pics of every outfit I wear, so I will certainly be pointing her to my photostream so she can look back and see my outfits over the last 2 years if she wants. I will have my camera in my purse because I always do, but the advise is well taken. I really am interested in HER and would hate to do something stoopid. We already know that she's not turned off by guys in hose & dresses (at least not the nice looking ones, hehehe) I just wonder if she knows that's it possible for a guy to look much nicer en femme than in regular mode. When I go out dressed Tues, it will be just my 11th time out so far this year, so I hope I don't scare her too much when she meets the regular me!

Best,
SS

Reine - You type faster than me! That's a very complex set of questions you ask. Yes, she does know I'm a guy & it would be my dream if she had romantic thoughts too, but I don't want to presume anything. It's a dream come true for many reasons - She's a dress designer, something I would love to learn more about, an obviuosly CD friendly woman, and a host of other things. Maybe it's not a CD's dream come true, but middle-aged-guy-who-hasn't-had-a-girl-friend-in-a-while's dream come true is more accurate? Maybe it's a double dream come true- meeting a woman who can accept both.

[joandher]

Yes ... a very good point. You only just met her. I think you should just hang out and talk and get to know one another better. Forget about anything else except bonding on an emotional level. (that's my 2 cents).

I totally agree with Rachel, baby steps first get to know one another ,pictures later

Hugs J-JAY

[ReineD]

Maybe it's not a CD's dream come true, but middle-aged-guy-who-hasn't-had-a-girl-friend-in-a-while's dream come true is more accurate? Maybe it's a double dream come true- meeting a woman who can accept both.

If she is eager to meet with you, then you may have found a great match! :)

But if you can, try not to be too preoccupied about the particulars such as the best outfit or flawless makeup. This is not what she is looking at, if she is an average, hetero GG like me. If the two of you clicked, it was not about how well you pass, or how beautiful you are. Speaking for myself, appearance is secondary since I would have connected with you on much deeper levels than that. In other words, your inner self, your personality would have informed your attractiveness quotient in my eyes. :)

So have fun on Tuesday, and let us know how it turns out! :hugs:

[CallieH]

Fantastic and to-the-point advice as always from Reine.

SS, hope you two are able to build on your initial connection and have a great time together!

[docrobbysherry]

I totally agree with Rachel, baby steps first get to know one another ,pictures later
Hugs J-JAY

I've been on a LOT of first dates lately, Skirt! My biggest issue is being in the moment. That means REALLY listening to what they say, and REALLY being myself! I find doing those very difficult! Because if I'm attracted to her, I tend to get overly excited, like u sound! If I'm not attracted rite away, I tend to let my mind wander! In NEITHER case, I'm I presenting myself properly or giving the girl the proper attention she deserves! I'D NEVER go on a first date dressed!

Because I KNOW I wouldn't be who I really am dressed, nor be able to concentrate on my date as I would like!

[skirtsuit]

I met with my new friend on tues wearing a nice dress & sweater.
She is a very interesting woman, we talled non-stop for her entire lunch hour. I think I found a new friend, but sadly, she is moving to the West Coast at the end of the year, which is too bad because I think we could be really good friends. She has an ex-husband in NYC and a boyfriend that she said she hasn't talked to in a month, so I dunno about that. Anyway, it was nice to make the connection and I will be seeing her again soon, in guy mode next time!

We talked about the CDing a bit and she said she has an old & dear friend who, like me, is a hetero male CD and that she doesn't think she'll ever understand it. I agreed with her - not really sure why I do either! Anyway, we can share our love of womens clothes without me saying too much about why. We talked about doing some thrifting together which would be a real blast as she is a clothing designer and maker and daughter of a tailor & coutureieriereer. She said she needs some new suits for the job she'll be doing out west. Please, please torture me and force me to go suit shopping with you!!! Another daywear fethish CD's dream come true!!

Best,
SS

BTW, here's what I was wearing
168448

Photo NOT by my new friend.

[CallieH]

Glad to hear you had fun, and that you made a good connection!