OMG I am coming out slowly

[Suzette Muguet de Mai]

Well, I just had a male friend in for a social visit at work. Sitting down chatting away he asks "you wearing eyeliner?" I said "yes", he asked "why?" I said because I am a MtF person. "He asks when did this happen, just recently?" I said "no, all my life I have had issues, just now I am coming out of the closet. I may have GID but need to get checked."

He then told me about a friend he had who was ex army and became female. Well, he just said ok so what, does not affect him and we continued on talking as if nothing was ever different. Upon reflection, I am so happy to have such a friend.

I think my protective little sphere is being deflated. Maybe I am gaining confidence in being me and not someone else.

Maybe one builds up barriers trying to protect yourself but ends up in hurting yourself because ones fears are not real but just your imagination imprisoning you. Belief in yourself is needed to display confidence and that helps to dictate to others your openness of yourself.
Maybe my answering straight back from being asked why to stating my issues displayed that I have no problem, why should you.
I hope this is a start of my acceptance of who I am.

[Marissa333]

I think it's good you are branching out and letting people in on your secret since it can be so relieving. However, be careful not to tell the wrong person as none of us want to see you hurt in any way.

[Marleena]

I think it's good you are branching out and letting people in on your secret since it can be so relieving. However, be careful not to tell the wrong person as none of us want to see you hurt in any way.

Agreed. Im happy this went well for you! Some people just don't get it though. It feels so good to get it out in the open, but choose carefully. In my case the less people that know about me the better.

[Aprilrain]

Good luck in your journey where ever it takes you. Here are a few things to consider. People are often shocked when they first hear about our gender issues and react in an underwhelmed way, as if it is no big deal however given some time they may change their mind. Just a fair warning to you. I hope this does not happen with your friend but if your going to come out to people as a CD or "TG" (that's what I called it at first too:heehee:) or TS than you'd better be prepared for some fall out. I don't associate with any of the males that were my "friends" before I started transition. I have a bunch of female friends that I didn't have before though so I think I actually made out in the trade!

[Claire Cook]

I think my protective little sphere is being deflated. Maybe I am gaining confidence in being me and not someone else.

Maybe one builds up barriers trying to protect yourself but ends up in hurting yourself because ones fears are not real but just your imagination imprisoning you. Belief in yourself is needed to display confidence and that helps to dictate to others your openness of yourself. Maybe my answering straight back from being asked why to stating my issues displayed that I have no problem, why should you.
I hope this is a start of my acceptance of who I am.

Tania, I think you are right on here. I have gone through this over the past few years and I am getting more and more comfortable with myself. And when we are comfortable with ourselves, others are. It's maybe less about coming out but more about discovering and accepting ourselves -- a continual process.

[kimdl93]

I find that people often surprise us. Even people we fear may be very intolerant, based on their general comments about CDrs, may hold surprisingly tolerant views when it involves someone they know and care about.

[gabimartini]

I hope this is a start of my acceptance of who I am.

That's great, Tania! Anyone can wear female clothing, lipstick and makeup. But this is where it truly begins, in my opinion: self-acceptance. So, good for you!

[Suzette Muguet de Mai]

I am slowly weeding out friends and family who are into themselves and have no respect for others. I am choosing only those who I am relaxed with and always see if I am ok. My process is basically to ignore and never to offer help, funny thing is the only time most see if I am ok is only when they need some advice on some machine's problems. Those are being pushed aside.
Those who see me and talk to me and have shared in stories past and present will be considered to be allowed into my world.

Being an older person, I am extremely cautious but those who show me respect, will get my respect back and with it "no more lies in regards to ME".

I think one thing I do know, it the person is worth me wasting a few minutes of my precious life chatting to them I will treasure it. I do not want to waste any of my life conforming to others ideas detrimental to my happiness.

[Debglam]

Tania_aCrossdresser;2652658]I think my protective little sphere is being deflated. Maybe I am gaining confidence in being me and not someone else.

That is great Tania! I've seen it referred to as "gender leak." Slowly moving more towards where you want to be. It is interesting to see when people really start to take notice.

Debby