OMG trapped in my own home!!

[Jessicajane]

My heart is still pounding and I am stressed as can be.....

following my post early today over limits etc...my wife took the children out for the night and I had my Jess time....didn't bother with much makeup..threw on a dress , heels and wig and started doing some work....I thought it would be fun to take some pics so I started altering the computer camera, and stepping back into the hall by the front door, to take some snaps...after 5 mins or so the phone rang..it was my wife saying she was on the way back and giving me time to change...whilst I was mid conversation a very heavy and loud banging on the front door broke the conversation...I made my excuses and ended the call...and sat panick stricken in the study...by the front door with no way out of the room that would not pass the window by the side of the front door....for a full 5 mins I sat there as the person repeatedly hammered on the door in a forcefull way...not saying a word...whoever it was must have known I was there as I had the lights on and had been talking openly and loudly to my wife...I did not hear them leave but waited a full 10 min before stipping off and making a dash for the bedroom...thankfully , they must have left...now I am wondering if they saw me posing for the camera as they walked by...or wether it was as simple as a neighbour calling round to have a chat/beer...

either way they have taken 5 years off my life...folkes around here are not that tolerant and as per my earlier post my wife does not want neighbours knowing our private life, and I have tried to respect that lets hope this does not become a problem and the secret is out...gulp!!!.

[Marleena]

Oh my, this our worst fear! I have had close calls too, and feel the same way about the neighbors, and strangers. I close all the blinds, lock the door etc, or simply stay away from windows and keep my male clothes nearby for a quick change. I would think if they pounded that hard, they did not see you or if they did, realize it was you. If I walked up to a friend's house and saw what you think they may have, I would turn around and leave. I think most people would. I'm thinking it will be okay for you.:)

Good luck!

[Jessicajane]

Thank for the words of comfort Marleena, I spoke to my SO just now and she reckons it was the husband of the friend she is out with...if he has seen...o'shit !!(excuse the language), but I am hoping you are right and that he would have made a bolt for it rather than comfronted...also if he was sure I was there I would have thought he would have called out or something...eeerrmmm...gulp ...hopefully anyway!!

As for not recognising me...not a chance of getting away with this one I was in girl /guy mode i.e virtually no make up , just wig shoes and dress...I was not trying to pass just trying to relax...a blind person on a galloping horse would have seen it was me ..!!:sad:

[Cynthia Anne]

If you were seen you'll find out real soon I imagine! Perhaps a note on the front door would help the next time! ''DO NOT DISTURB!'' Hugs!

[Amy Hepker]

You should have opened the door and if they said anything tell them your wife was punishing you because she thought you were cheating. It was this or a Chasity cage.

[Marleena]

My fingers are crossed for you Jessica! I still feel whoever it was knew somebody was home, but did not see anything they weren't supposed to.:)

[Alberta_Pat]

If, and this is a big if, you are challenged for "not answering the door", you can always say that you were soaking in the tub.

That will tell whoever it was that you are not in a position to discuss the evening.

[candykowal]

My worst fear too sister.
I always have a change of clothes available in the bathroom and the light is on.
I come to the door late, I was in the washroom....

[Amy Lynn3]

Jess, I have been in your cloths..ugh, I mean position many times myself. Panic does not describe the feeling very well, but as you say it takes years off your life. Nothing ever came out of all my near misses and I'm sure things will be okay between you and your neighbors. Sometimes our mind can be our worst enemy, when we start thinking about all the "what if's".

[Rachel Mari]

It's amazing how sudden that stress/panic appears when you're home alone and not expecting anyone and hearing a pounding on the door. The last thing you want or need is to have such an quick ending to an otherwise pleasant time and to feel trapped on top of it makes it even worse.

I've experienced that same type of incident once before and nothing came of it. Maybe they thought you were home but couldn't hear them knocking so they kept trying. And if anything is ever said to you, who will argue with the excuse of being in the bathroom and unable to get to the door.

[Persephone]

Sorry to hear about the terrible time and the stress you were under. I can certainly remember what that felt like!

Of course, if whoever it was did think they saw a woman in your house while your wife was away it could be a completeely different story!

Hugs,
Persephone.

[sandra-leigh]

Around here... I just answer the door as I am (pausing only long enough to get "decent".) My house, my life.

[MandyLee]

that has happen to me a few times

I strip and get the door unlook it say come in as i walk away with any thing over my but saying I be right back . tellthem hay i was hanging out naked while I had a empty house. or if I can I get to the door late and say cought me on the craperLOL

[suzy1]

Nope, it would have taken 10 years of my life!
I bet almost all of us have been there at sometime.
Tell me, did you take your pulse at the time Jessica? My pulse is running at 100 just reading this.

Hugs, SUZY

[MsKimiko]

That is one of my largest fears. Atleast your wife knows about your dressing. I have those same close calls but with my SO :(

[Kittyagain]

A few years ago I had almost exactly the same thing happen to me. I am sure I was seen. Nothing every came of it and I am still good friends with them.

Kitty

[Chickhe]

You we're just fooling around with some halloween items you were putting away and was going to scare your wife and felt embarrased to answer the door when it wasn't her... no big deal!..

[Longing2be-Trisha]

I would say yikes! That was close call so now relax and laugh about it!

Hugs

[DanaR]

This has happened to me a couple of times too.

[Jessicajane]

Thanks girls....can sound the all clear now...the guy who called round visited this afternoon ...did not mention anything and if he did see something (which I now doubt) it has not affected how he acts around me...thank goodness as it was the SO's best friend, if that had been messed up I would have been for the high jump...!

Like the idea about the "do not disturb sign" might try that next time !!!!

[donnalee]

There is absolutely NOTHING that says you must answer the door, and many reasons not to. You do not need to make up excuses, you do not need to explain ANYTHING; it is your prerogative and you do not have to exercise it, period. The same applies to the phone or any other interruption.

[Jessicajane]

Yes Donnalee, I agree.....the pressure I felt in this instance was because I was right next to the front door, it was obvious I was in and had been talking and laughing loudly, when the knocking started...it was I suspect it was obvious I was in the room and whilst I stayed put and did not answer the door...it could easily appear rude if you know the person you are visiting is in, just by the door and doesn't answer.....

[anonymousinmaryland]

Ah. The joys of the game. Soon, you will be laughing this off. Nice photo, BTW. Best wishes.

[DinaMature]

I had a similar event just two days ago, on Friday. I had gotten home from work, showered and had just put on my forms and a bra to hold them in place while the adhesive set well. I had on warm sloppy sweats otherwise... Unexpectedly the door bell rang and then a knock followed. I have a neighbor who is out of work and occassionaly bums smokes from me- I assumed it was he at the door.
My GF got up to respond but I assumed it would be a waste of her time to go down and answer it, so I lifted my sweatshirt, peeled my tacky forms out of the bra and hurried down to answer the knock, grabbing my cigs as I went.

It turned out to be a UPS delivery!!! Bah! I'd have left my forms in and still answered that knock if I'd known. I've greeted assorted delivery people in various stages of 'dressed' and leave to them to deal with it.

I just don't want to blatantly 'out' myself to the neighbors, though. Having said that, last week I was fairly fresh from the shower, wearing silk pajamas and a very fem floral dressing gown, when a knock came. I thought it was the expected dinner delivery and instead it WAS the smoke bumming neighbor. He got an eyefull, I know.

[jillleanne]

Quite a heart thumper isn't it? lmao, sorry Been there far too many times in the past. Everytime thinking I would have a heart attack. Wait until you lock yourself out of the house dressed. Been there, had to kick down the door and then come up with a good excuse as to why the door had 8 screws in it that were never there before. Wait until you forget to lock the doors and a friend walks in unannounced. That one I made it into the shower fully dressed and soaked!! and had to yellout I would call them later when I was finished showering. What a mess that one was!! Wait until your neighbor comes over and catches you walking around outdoors. Mine caught me in a deep plunging sexy red dress and heels. I freaked and froze. She asked me if Kevin was home and I said I'd tell him to call her. She be-lined it back to her house. later I told her it was me she saw and I was practicing for a house party where we all were switching roles and asked her to keep it quiet. She told me she thought I had a hooker at the house and didn't want to stick around. lol I'm sure there are more I forget now.

[gabimartini]

My heart goes out to you.

[Jessicajane]

Quite a heart thumper isn't it? lmao, sorry Been there far too many times in the past. Everytime thinking I would have a heart attack. Wait until you lock yourself out of the house dressed. Been there, had to kick down the door and then come up with a good excuse as to why the door had 8 screws in it that were never there before. Wait until you forget to lock the doors and a friend walks in unannounced. That one I made it into the shower fully dressed and soaked!! and had to yellout I would call them later when I was finished showering. What a mess that one was!! Wait until your neighbor comes over and catches you walking around outdoors. Mine caught me in a deep plunging sexy red dress and heels. I freaked and froze. She asked me if Kevin was home and I said I'd tell him to call her. She be-lined it back to her house. later I told her it was me she saw and I was practicing for a house party where we all were switching roles and asked her to keep it quiet. She told me she thought I had a hooker at the house and didn't want to stick around. lol I'm sure there are more I forget now.

Girl, you crack me up I have not laughed so much in ages...thanks for putting a smile back on my face...the situations we get ourselves in...!!!....at least you are able to dig yourself out of your nightmares..!!

Thanks for a great post
Hugs
Jess xx

[ashlylynn]

Dear OP

Dude - we ALL KNOW that you have entered the Adam Sandler JACK AND JILL contest
to hopefully win a trip to Hollywood for your family - duh ....

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0810913/

So that's your excuse when the s**t hits the fan.

[sometimes_miss]

Dear OP

Dude - we ALL KNOW that you have entered the Adam Sandler JACK AND JILL contest
to hopefully win a trip to Hollywood for your family - duh ....

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0810913/

So that's your excuse when the s**t hits the fan.

Yup, there we go! "Yeah, my deaf sister was visiting from out of town".

[Erica Marie]

I know your pain. The worst feeling in the world is the sound of a car pulling up, headlights in the driveway or a knock on the door. Your heart feels like it wants to jump right out of your chest. I wish there was a real solution to privacy.

[Stephanie47]

Look at the up side. If the neighbor you think saw you en femme, then he has spread the word that you're two timing your wife. At least your cross dressing activities are still in the closet. :)

[eluuzion]

These types of issues are always interesting to me, because it illustrates one of the basic sources of conflict in many relationships that partners are often not aware of. I could not resist this opportunity to point out an interesting issue about personality types. I decided to toss it out here in case somebody might think it is interesting. I’m not trying to beat something to death to prove some point…there isn’t one, :D. If it seems irrelevant or boring…feel free to skip reading on…:)

There are two personality (behavioral) “types”. Proactive and Reactive.

An extremely simplified explanation of the differences:

Reactive Personalities
Basically place responsibility for what happens to them elsewhere. They wait for something to happen, and then they “react” (respond) to it. It is a strategy based upon the perception that what happens to you is out of your control. For example…somebody may hit me with a bat and break my leg. What matters is who is at blame for causing my injury and what they should do or might do next about it, which I will have to deal with. In other words my injured leg is not really “my problem”. So, I believe I am never really in control of my life. My life is a constant process of reacting to people and events that happen to me.

Reactive personalities often focus on assigning blame, which increases the potential for using this as an excuse for not being successful in achieving their goals.
“If this did not happen, if they did not do this or that, if this would have or would not have happened, if I did not have to deal with this or that, …I would have been able to do…this or that.”

Proactive Personalities
assume responsibility for everything that happens to them, regardless of the person or event that caused them to be in a particular situation. For example…somebody may hit me with a bat and break my leg. It does not really matter who it was. What matters is accepting the fact that I have to deal with a broken leg from that point and decide what to do next with my condition. By taking responsibility for my condition I am taking control over my life. It puts me in control of my own life.

Proactive strategies are constantly focused on finding available opportunities that can be utilized to improve their chances for success and advance their position toward a goal(s). It is a “predictive” orientation with a basic perception that you are in charge of controlling what happens to you in life.

“I can not control what happens to me in life, but I can decide how I will react to it”.
This is a great saying and a healthy approach for both personalities. But it applies differently to each personality. A reactive personality takes it at face value and acts accordingly. A proactive personality would have tried to predict the negative outcomes in advance and taken measures to lessen the potential for negative outcomes, as well as dealing with any negative outcome that may have already occurred by trying to find ways to avoid the negative outcome in the future.

I am proactive. My ex was reactive. I wanted to put up a child gate to keep our young toddler from falling down the stairs, so she could explore freely. My ex saw no reason for the gate, because our toddler had not fallen down the stairs yet. Her technique was to just keep yelling “NO” every time our daughter started to explore the open stairway. Our whole relationship was like that every day. Yes, we are divorced…:D

Applying the previous explanations to this thread topic…

I am a proactive personality. So my first thought is that I secured my house to the point where the potential for that type of event to occur is minimal or impossible. At a minimum I would have an “emergency” plan in place ahead of time so if/when it occurs, I know exactly how to counter it. (Like running into the shower, etc). If it was an event I had not prepared for, I would be focusing on how to make sure it never happened that way again.

My intention here is not to minimize your heart stopping experience, or criticize any manner in which you or anybody else deals with such events. I have similar experiences in my past. They are certainly entertaining stories later…but a very real crisis at the time they occur! CDing certainly makes life exciting at times, eh? :D

just some thoughts...I never claim that they are "stable", lol.

:love:

[docrobbysherry]

Jessica, it's simply a matter of which ones; drapes, curtains, or blinds for the window by your front door!

When I'm sessioning in my living room, 2 neighbors have 2nd story bedrooms that look rite down into it! so, I simply close the drapes! End of problems!

[angpai30]

I have gotten myself into many situations like that, but as of recent I haven't had any fear of what I'm doing. I have learned that we all have nothing to fear as friends do come and go, but good friends are always hard to find. I don't even call them friends unless we actually do something together "Acquaintances" more like it. Even then I have started to realize that by keeping this a secret; life becomes more difficult and I am always depressed. I recently talked to my mother about an incident that happened last week. My mother knows about my dressing and doesn't approve, but she really reamed my father for what he did. I love my mother and the cool part is she will actually let me use her computer so that I can chat with others like me and shop for dresses and stuff. I think she is now coming around to understand that she would rather have a relationship with her son/daughter rather than not have one at all. So we do need to be careful, but life is to short to keep secrets.

Kristen~~

[angelinamuk]

how many times has that happened to me too

[RenneB]

I here you girl, it happened to me and I swear three grey hairs popped out.... LOL. I've become the change master and can usually 'jump' out of the supergirl outfit in about 5 minutes. That is unless makeup and nails are involved.....that's a whole nuther story....

But hey, you survived. I wounder what would have happened if you shouted back through the door in your most manly voice? Dude...publisher's clearing house is here... or "hey did you order the pizza?"....

Renne......

[suchacutie]

After reading all the entries in this thread, the thought popped into my mind, "How could anyone think that we could stop being who we are?". Who would put themselves in the positions we do just to have time to be our feminine selves, even in the "privacy" of our own homes?

It also shows that we all learn to be incredible planners! We can't be transgendered without learning how to be organized!!!

But even the best of plans can use improving! :)

tina

[GingerLeigh]

If someone knew you were there and asks why you didn't answer, tell them you had gastroenteritis and were in the bathroom with explosive...er...uh... you know. Anyhoo I'm sure it'll gross them out and the conversation will end.

Gigner

[~Joanne~]

Luckily, I have never had a close call other than the neighbor running across the building to look at my legs better the one time I did go out on halloween. Because my GF pulled the car around he must have thought it was Her and a friend leaving for the evening. He and his wife moved away shortly afterwards and I have always wondered the reasoning behind the move. that's out of fear lol

I am a closet dresser so I only go full nine (makeup and nails) when I am taking pics or maybe if it's another outing which never happens . If someone comes knocking I can get undressed fairly quickly and would throw pants over my hose.

I would just tell a neighbor like that, with a door like that, that they trapped you butt naked in the bathroom as you were getting in the shower and had they moved away for a minute you could have gotten dressed :) then there is the I was in the basement thing if you have one. matter of fact, I can think of a 1000 excuses lol us closet dressers are good at excuses ;)

[Daphne Renee]

If anyone does ask you why you didnt answer the door.. You dont have to give them an answer. It is your house and as long as your not doing anything illegal you dont have to answer to anyone. of course next time you could just answer the door.. Make up something like you were in the middle of sex games with your wife.. lol

[Acastina]

There is absolutely NOTHING that says you must answer the door, and many reasons not to. You do not need to make up excuses, you do not need to explain ANYTHING; it is your prerogative and you do not have to exercise it, period. The same applies to the phone or any other interruption.

I could not agree more. Ignore it, but next time don't put yourself in a place where you can get trapped with no avenue of retreat. And leaving relevant windows uncovered is asking for trouble. We wait for a message on most phone calls when caller ID doesn't say it's someone we'll pick up for. In our 24/7 cultures one has to reserve the right to stay in the cave and lock the door...

[stacycoral]

If someone knew you were there and asks why you didn't answer, tell them you had gastroenteritis and were in the bathroom with explosive...er...uh... you know. Anyhoo I'm sure it'll gross them out and the conversation will end.

Gigner
sounds like the plan

I know your pain. The worst feeling in the world is the sound of a car pulling up, headlights in the driveway or a knock on the door. Your heart feels like it wants to jump right out of your chest. I wish there was a real solution to privacy.
wow, do i know this,

You we're just fooling around with some halloween items you were putting away and was going to scare your wife and felt embarrased to answer the door when it wasn't her... no big deal!..
i alway love Chickhe thoughts
Jessica, it is so nice that are SO, calls us to let we (girls) know when we need to change, my so does this for me some time now, And the heart, girl, i have been scared a good couple of times, like you i just acted like a whole in the wall. Hope everything works out ok, LEts know.

[NicoleScott]

It's your door and you choice to answer it or not. You don't owe any explanations. If you find out who it was, you have more right to an apology for banging on your door so long and loudly than you owe an apology for not answering.
Hey, how about some closed curtains?

[Mark/Rebecca]

I can only imagine how wonderful not having the fear of discovery would be when dressing, It must make the experience feel more natural and relaxing. The fear of getting caught adds nothing to the excitement of my dressing, only to the anxiety.

[linda allen]

Curtains? Drapes? Blinds?

[WsprsOnTheWind]

If someone is rude enough to ask, just tell them it was a relative visiting and she didnt' answer the door while you and your wife were gone b/c she don't know anyone in the area.

[linda allen]

It has been mentioned, but there's no law saying you have to answer the door. You might be napping, you might be in the shower or bath, you might be on the toilet, many reasons you wouldn't answer the dorr or even head a knock.

I would look into blinds or other window coverings, though and not only for this reason.