fem in front of wife for first time

[litlejohn]

I had told my wife about my dressing a little over a month ago. It is going better than i could of ever dreamed. We talk almost constantly and both listen as well which is different( at least for me lol).
Last night after some awesome alone time together( we have 2 kids), we were lying in bed talking and my clothes and dressing came up. I had told her I was dressed earlier and had to cut it short( daughter came home an hour early but not even close to caught) so no biggie just wished i could of stayed dressed longer. I asked if she would be ok with me dressing? she said no problem. of course i asked are you sure? and she was fine with it. I already had panties on grabbed the tights from earlier put them on then i went to the closet to finish.
I know pics would be better but not there yet. I had on a dark blue with white flower skirt just above my knees and long sleeve white top. my wig goes down past the middle of my back. no makeup and still have my winter beard lol.
She had me walk back and forth in front of her turn and wanted to see my shoes 5" peep toe pumps. She said i looked nice have great legs and loved the way the wig looked and matched my eyebrows and beard. Have to do something about the breast first water balloons were to pointy her words.
It was cool last night 30's i think after midnight. she followed me down the stairs and to the front door to watch me go get the mail.
I then tried on a few dresses for her( and me), but didn't stay in them long.
A truely amazing evening, my SO is unbelievable.

[Cynthia Anne]

Hey girl, I'm happy for you! As long as she stays comfortable progress should flow like wine! Thanks for sharing your heartwarming story! Hugs!

[Piora]

Sounds like things are moving well for you, and your wife seems very accepting - and in fact, quite into it! Since your wife mentioned how your wig matches your beard colour....it's obvious that she has no problem with you having one while dressed.

You obviously have a good solid relationship with your wife....add that to her being cool with your dressing around her speaks volumes. You're very lucky.

[Raychel Torn]

This is a such a great start. You need to enjoy it, but remember that no matter how accepting she is new, she can still get scared later. Men tend to decide things once and move on, so if it's ok today it's most likely ok next week. Women on the other hand tend to think through things again and again, so you need to keep checking in with her about her feelings and don't take it personally if she gets scared of and on along the way.

Have a great journey!

[Marlana]

Good for you littlejohn! Just be careful about how far you go. SO's can change their minds fast. Hope it continues in a positive direction!

[MissMarcie]

She said i looked nice have great legs and loved the way the wig looked and matched my eyebrows and beard.

ummmmm.....uhhh...beard?

[Piora]

ummmmm.....uhhh...beard?

Sure. There are lots of members on here who have facial hair and dress, too. Some even have full beards. I had one while I was on hiatus from dressing for some years. But I shaved it off when I started up again. Some women are accepting of their husbands/boyfriends' crossdressing - but draw the line at them losing some very masculine traits - such as beards/moustaches etc.

[Jeannie]

but draw the line at them losing some very masculine traits

Piora I know what you mean, I want to shave everything but the wife keeps saying that she loves her hairy man. I am still working on it though.

litlejohn, The important thing here is that your SO has accepted your dressing. Now maybe she will help you take it to the next level if that is what you want. Sometimes things must be taken one step at a time. Good luck.

[anonymousinmaryland]

Good news. Just don't overdo it by pushing the envelope too quickly.

[MissMarcie]

Sure. There are lots of members on here who have facial hair and dress, too. Some even have full beards. I had one while I was on hiatus from dressing for some years. But I shaved it off when I started up again. Some women are accepting of their husbands/boyfriends' crossdressing - but draw the line at them losing some very masculine traits - such as beards/moustaches etc.
I can respect your opinion, but sorry, I have to draw the line somewhere. Full bearded CD? That's just a bit too weird for me. Lots of guys don't have beards.

[Piora]

I can respect your opinion, but sorry, I have to draw the line somewhere. Full bearded CD? That's just a bit too weird for me. Lots of guys don't have beards.

Well, that's true - but many CDs do. While it is not for you (I can't have a beard and crossdress, either) it's a fact, and several members I know of here, including a friend on this site, have beards. But you know, it's part of something called compromise. The wives and SOs can deal with the dressing, but want to keep their guys with beards from shaving. Not ideal, I agree - but certainly a middle ground.

[Rachel Flowers]

I have a beard. It wouldn't come off for anyone except Mrs Flowers and she doesn't want it to come off!

Not all of us are trying to pass, either for others or ourselves; different CDs have different needs. I was discouraged when i went en homme to a social meeting and was told not wanting to shave it off would be a hindrance. What this site has taught me in the few short weeks I've been here is that there are no rules, everyone's path and destination is different but we all need validation and acceptance. Some of us are getting more of that offline than others and this forum is a great place to share the love and kind thoughts.

[Rachel Flowers]

Marcie, there are plenty of people out there who try to impose their own idea of "weird" on us. Let's not start doing it to each other!!

[April_Ligeia]

I agree 100% with this thread. I am a crossdresser, not a transexual, so I dress however I like, I don't need to pass as female. Wear whatever makes you look and feel good. I have had a beard on and off and it really messes with people if you go out with a beard, eyeliner and nail polish. That's fun!

[Piora]

I have a beard. It wouldn't come off for anyone except Mrs Flowers and she doesn't want it to come off!

Not all of us are trying to pass, either for others or ourselves; different CDs have different needs. I was discouraged when i went en homme to a social meeting and was told not wanting to shave it off would be a hindrance. What this site has taught me in the few short weeks I've been here is that there are no rules, everyone's path and destination is different but we all need validation and acceptance. Some of us are getting more of that offline than others and this forum is a great place to share the love and kind thoughts.

Good post, Rachel. Although almost all of us are crossdressers here in this Forum, we are still all individuals, and do not come pre-packaged in a convenient one-size-fits-all box. Many of us have different ideas about dressing, and we work with what's comfortable for each of us. I'm closeted, so I would never go out anyway, and since I've been told that I look younger without my goatee, I'm sticking with the clean-shaven look! :battingeyelashes: But shaving off one's beard should be because you wanted to anyway, not because of dressing.

I agree with you 100% on your comment about the love and kind thoughts.

[litlejohn]

Of course with this being very new to her we talk about it often but not constantly. I generally wait for her to bring it up, but if I have a question or comment about something she has made me comfortable enough to do so. I told her again yesterday morning if anything bothers her to please let me know, and not just the cding. we are both growing in this together. I think she is enjoying having someone to talk to who is actually listening to her. I think that is something I had been failing to do at times.
As for the beard, this was spur of the moment. I didn't get to shave my legs either(week ago). It gets cool here in indiana and i work both inside and out so it comes in handy. Most of my fem time is short hour or two at the most, so shave and make up would use up to much time.
She asked how far i wanted to take this. I told her I would like to go shopping with her and out to a club. If this ever happens it will be her decision. Alot of cders talk about how being outed would affect them, but the effects to my SO and family is more the important.
I have chosen to do this, she on the other hand has been brought into this. So far she is working with and through it. All public events will have to go through her.

[Piora]

Well, you're moving in a very good and positive direction! Your thinking is spot on. Small steps....small steps. I think you already know that this can't be hurried. As for your wife....you definitely want to hang onto that lady for dear life!

[Lace-Is-Great]

That's fantastic that your SO is so accepting! I was lucky that one of my previous girlfriends had read a book about one wife's experiences with her crossdresser husband.
Oh, and I guess that that particular previous girlfriend of mine was bi also helped, lol.
~ Danielle

[MissMarcie]

I was discouraged when i went en homme to a social meeting and was told not wanting to shave it off would be a hindrance.
No, I'm not judging anyone. If you're a 100% stay at home CD, whatever works for you, different strokes, ya know?
IMHO, in public...it's a totally different story. I have to admit that I think it would be disgusting.

I agree 100% with this thread. I am a crossdresser, not a transexual, so I dress however I like, I don't need to pass as female. Wear whatever makes you look and feel good. I have had a beard on and off and it really messes with people if you go out with a beard, eyeliner and nail polish. That's fun!
Again, different strokes...but that's definitely not my idea of fun.