Anyone else feel like this?

[Stacey Summer]

I'm not certain this is the right topic for this part of the forum so please moderators, feel free to move it.

Anyway, a friend asked me if I wanted to transition and I immediately said no. Then I gave it some serious thought. I have in the past, briefly thought that it would be awesome to be female but this was different. Cue some deep soul-searching and I arrive at a more detailed answer for her than "No".

I'm 6' 2" with decidedly male features and a typical male physique. If I were to undergo HRT and SRS I would technically be female but I know I would look like every bigots idea of a "Tranny" and that would depress me. I have accepted that while CDing, no matter how nice my clothes, how well done my makeup or how good my walk or mannerisms are I'm not going to truly pass. If I were to become female I would have to be totally female or it wouldn't work.

To cut it short, do I want to become female? No. I just wish I was born one. :sad:

Stacey.
xx

[stacycoral]

Stacey, girl i know what you mean to a tea, i have over the years wish i was female, i the next day i still wake up me,but the body i wanted, i understand about the height, and the feelings, Stacey, enjoy being a girl all you can, that is what i am trying to do, Stacy

[Loni]

i am not sure if i would do all the knife stuff. but if i could have breasts and live full time including a job...or just be not in need of cash it would be a life. sure all my problems would still be with me. but to be loni all day every day no mater what or were i am.

[Rachel Mari]

I'm with you on this one.

There's the old stand by of "If I knew then what I know now".

I've been asking myself (and my therapist asked me too) if I want to transition and the answer has always been no, with a side note. I do wish certain parts of me were gone, but I can't, I don't believe it in myself, to take those steps to the body I was born with at my age (55).
If I was 25 it might be different, but at that point in my history, I was still very alone and the only CD in the world that I knew about. My body too is a mascline body and no amount of HRT or SRS will change that. I know how I feel inside and I believe that I can reach a balance some day (after a lot of work and acceptance of myself).

And I really like Lemonade. And Limeade's good too.

[TommyII]

I'm sure I would be an unacceptable female. 5' 11" bare foot with way to big a chest and shoulders. In the years I should have done the transition I was too busy with work and raising kids. Now that I have time for me, I find that the choice is not realistic. All that's left is the enjoyment of dressing and feeling good about it now. It is a very pleasant time. I like me.