Jessica86
11-27-2011, 11:15 PM
I've had a very stressful holiday. I found out that I am going to be a father again. We are expecting our second child (I have a two year old son) and I felt...kind of frustrated at first, but did not express it. We aimed at having another child after our son was out of diapers, and potty trained. Oh, the joys. He is on the verge of doing it all on his own, but still needs someone to lead him to the bathroom. Well, we decided to try, but sheesh. I didn't expect the first few times to be....it. But, it doesn't matter if I found out now, two years from now, or five, I would have still been surprised. I think anyone is surprised when news of that nature surfaces.
My wife was extremely worried. I told her I was fine, but said I needed to get some air outside to think. I went to my brother's house, where I was literally in tears due to the news I had. I didn't know what to do, and I continued to tell him how everything was stacking up on me. We talked for a bit, but then I told him out of the blue that I have other issues. He was worried something was wrong with me, but I told him about how she hasn't been completely honest at all times, but I shared something very deep with her. He was scared I was sick, or something. I told him I didn't have a sickness, but a behavior I just prefer. Something that wasn't going to hurt anyone. So, I just told him "You know, do you ever hear about someone with an alternate personality?" I scooted across the chair, and set up straight. I was sweating....crying...depressed about everything going on. "I've had to accept the fact that I am a crossdresser."
My brother sat up for a second, and said "So, you like to wear a dress or something?" I said "If only it was that. It isn't." "Are you going to stop? Does your wife know?" I looked up at him and said "I don't want to stop, AND I can't. I have since I was like five. I love it, and have come to accept it is a part of me." I opened my phone and showed him my avatar picture with a few others. "This is me (avatar pic) and I'm not really trying. I was just cleaning. Now flip to the right, and look. That's me trying." My brother just looked and said "Ok, I'm starting to feel worse than you. You...look hot! You look like a different person!" I told him I understood if he didn't want to talk to me anymore, but he said "Why would I do that? It is a part of you. I'm glad she (my wife) is okay with it, and it's cool how you guys hang out together. This doesn't change anything." I just...began crying like a little girl, and said "You know, I've had so much to deal with, and a child on the way. Everything is just....stressing. Thanks for taking a load off my shoulder. I just wanted to paint a picture to help you understand it." He told me he understood, but it doesn't change who I am. I am his brother, and he will never see me different because of anything I do.
We sat around, drank a few beers together, and even talked with our significant others about what the night had revealed. It was a great night. A night for celebration. A night where I got to reveal a new baby on the way, along with another special revealing. I had a good day, and I just have to convince myself that if I put my faith in the right place, everything will always work out.
My wife was extremely worried. I told her I was fine, but said I needed to get some air outside to think. I went to my brother's house, where I was literally in tears due to the news I had. I didn't know what to do, and I continued to tell him how everything was stacking up on me. We talked for a bit, but then I told him out of the blue that I have other issues. He was worried something was wrong with me, but I told him about how she hasn't been completely honest at all times, but I shared something very deep with her. He was scared I was sick, or something. I told him I didn't have a sickness, but a behavior I just prefer. Something that wasn't going to hurt anyone. So, I just told him "You know, do you ever hear about someone with an alternate personality?" I scooted across the chair, and set up straight. I was sweating....crying...depressed about everything going on. "I've had to accept the fact that I am a crossdresser."
My brother sat up for a second, and said "So, you like to wear a dress or something?" I said "If only it was that. It isn't." "Are you going to stop? Does your wife know?" I looked up at him and said "I don't want to stop, AND I can't. I have since I was like five. I love it, and have come to accept it is a part of me." I opened my phone and showed him my avatar picture with a few others. "This is me (avatar pic) and I'm not really trying. I was just cleaning. Now flip to the right, and look. That's me trying." My brother just looked and said "Ok, I'm starting to feel worse than you. You...look hot! You look like a different person!" I told him I understood if he didn't want to talk to me anymore, but he said "Why would I do that? It is a part of you. I'm glad she (my wife) is okay with it, and it's cool how you guys hang out together. This doesn't change anything." I just...began crying like a little girl, and said "You know, I've had so much to deal with, and a child on the way. Everything is just....stressing. Thanks for taking a load off my shoulder. I just wanted to paint a picture to help you understand it." He told me he understood, but it doesn't change who I am. I am his brother, and he will never see me different because of anything I do.
We sat around, drank a few beers together, and even talked with our significant others about what the night had revealed. It was a great night. A night for celebration. A night where I got to reveal a new baby on the way, along with another special revealing. I had a good day, and I just have to convince myself that if I put my faith in the right place, everything will always work out.