Anne2345
12-02-2011, 05:45 PM
My sister is a fantastic, incredible, special woman.
She is also a three time cancer survivor, a mother of a one year old beautiful baby girl, and a lovely, wonderful, human being. I have written about my sister on this forum before, and attributed much of my current strength, such that it is, to her.
My sister is also the strongest and most courageous person I know. The battles she has fought against cancer, the pain she has had to endure, and endures now, from surgery after surgery after surgery, is more than anyone should have to bear and go through. The strength of will and resolve to simply survive, so that she and her equally amazing husband may raise their child together is simply awe inspiring to me. I am humbled by my sister’s courage, strength, and determination to live life.
In this, I have learned much from the example my sister has set. I have also learned much from having witnessed the hell she has been through, and continues to go through. Although my sister is younger than I, and my baby sister at that, she is also my teacher.
For too long, I, like so many others, have taken life for granted. Having acknowledged and recognized this truth, much has changed for me this year. In hindsight, the wheels were set in motion long, long ago, but I needed a good kick in the butt and wakeup call to really open my eyes to my own personal truths, and life in general.
For example, I have learned that the doldrums and malaise I previously and unwittingly existed within were based upon my own creation of an adult life founded upon denial and suppression. Even though I have only recently admitted to myself who and what I truly am, I have always known the truth. I simply buried it deep, deep, deep into my psyche, and left the truth to gather dust and cobwebs. I thought perhaps if I ignored it long enough, if I ran far enough away, it would simply go away and stop harassing me.
Life, however, does not work that way, no matter how hard we may work to the contrary. At least, I failed in my ill-conceived attempt to do so, and thankfully so. I was on the verge of completely losing my sanity, and I did not even know it. I was travelling down the wrong path, and a path destined for misery, chaos, and failure.
I have written much about my recent experiences, feelings, and emotions on this forum. I have opened up my soul within these forum pages for all who care to view. I have cried much, I have felt much, and I have written much.
But what I have not done is tell my sister the truth about me. Until a week ago, that is . . . .
On a trip I took my sister on the past week, I came out to her. I told her all about me. I told her I my story, and that I am transgendered. I also thanked my sister for providing me the courage necessary to be able to do so. In response, I was met with warmth, acceptance, and unconditional love.
My sister loves and accepts me. Of course she would accept me, she is an amazing, wonderful person! But I was soooo scared, soooooo nervous in telling her! I was afraid, as I have been afraid my entire life.
In fact, I thought I might be sick during certain points of my admission. I thought I might hyperventilate. But I did neither. Instead, I told her. I completely and irrevocably opened up to her. When I cried, my sister came to me and held me. She comforted me, and showered my with love.
It was yet another amazing and life-changing cathartic event I have realized and experienced lately. My list is growing, and I am pleased that it is. These things that I am doing, they are necessary. I cannot not do them.
But the thing is, despite the difficulties and fear, I feel tremendous relief in so doing these things. Coming out to a family member is yet another necessary step in my progression and evolution.
And I freely admit that I really, really enjoyed the shopping trips my sister and I took together thereafter. She has impeccable taste in clothing and fashion, and is truly enthusiastic and excited by the prospect of future shopping trips. More than anything, though, she loves her big brother who also happens to be her big sister, and I love her, too . . . . :)
She is also a three time cancer survivor, a mother of a one year old beautiful baby girl, and a lovely, wonderful, human being. I have written about my sister on this forum before, and attributed much of my current strength, such that it is, to her.
My sister is also the strongest and most courageous person I know. The battles she has fought against cancer, the pain she has had to endure, and endures now, from surgery after surgery after surgery, is more than anyone should have to bear and go through. The strength of will and resolve to simply survive, so that she and her equally amazing husband may raise their child together is simply awe inspiring to me. I am humbled by my sister’s courage, strength, and determination to live life.
In this, I have learned much from the example my sister has set. I have also learned much from having witnessed the hell she has been through, and continues to go through. Although my sister is younger than I, and my baby sister at that, she is also my teacher.
For too long, I, like so many others, have taken life for granted. Having acknowledged and recognized this truth, much has changed for me this year. In hindsight, the wheels were set in motion long, long ago, but I needed a good kick in the butt and wakeup call to really open my eyes to my own personal truths, and life in general.
For example, I have learned that the doldrums and malaise I previously and unwittingly existed within were based upon my own creation of an adult life founded upon denial and suppression. Even though I have only recently admitted to myself who and what I truly am, I have always known the truth. I simply buried it deep, deep, deep into my psyche, and left the truth to gather dust and cobwebs. I thought perhaps if I ignored it long enough, if I ran far enough away, it would simply go away and stop harassing me.
Life, however, does not work that way, no matter how hard we may work to the contrary. At least, I failed in my ill-conceived attempt to do so, and thankfully so. I was on the verge of completely losing my sanity, and I did not even know it. I was travelling down the wrong path, and a path destined for misery, chaos, and failure.
I have written much about my recent experiences, feelings, and emotions on this forum. I have opened up my soul within these forum pages for all who care to view. I have cried much, I have felt much, and I have written much.
But what I have not done is tell my sister the truth about me. Until a week ago, that is . . . .
On a trip I took my sister on the past week, I came out to her. I told her all about me. I told her I my story, and that I am transgendered. I also thanked my sister for providing me the courage necessary to be able to do so. In response, I was met with warmth, acceptance, and unconditional love.
My sister loves and accepts me. Of course she would accept me, she is an amazing, wonderful person! But I was soooo scared, soooooo nervous in telling her! I was afraid, as I have been afraid my entire life.
In fact, I thought I might be sick during certain points of my admission. I thought I might hyperventilate. But I did neither. Instead, I told her. I completely and irrevocably opened up to her. When I cried, my sister came to me and held me. She comforted me, and showered my with love.
It was yet another amazing and life-changing cathartic event I have realized and experienced lately. My list is growing, and I am pleased that it is. These things that I am doing, they are necessary. I cannot not do them.
But the thing is, despite the difficulties and fear, I feel tremendous relief in so doing these things. Coming out to a family member is yet another necessary step in my progression and evolution.
And I freely admit that I really, really enjoyed the shopping trips my sister and I took together thereafter. She has impeccable taste in clothing and fashion, and is truly enthusiastic and excited by the prospect of future shopping trips. More than anything, though, she loves her big brother who also happens to be her big sister, and I love her, too . . . . :)