What bathroom do you use?

[KellyCT2011]

I am going out dressed for some drinks tonight(a Chili's/TGI Fridays type place). When/if i have to pee, what bathroom should I use? I have never been in this situation before.
Any help would be greatly appreciated!
Thanks!
~Kelly

[DanaR]

I use the restroom that matches how I'm dressed, if there isn't a uni-sex one available. If I was in the mall and kids were around, it could be different.

[Cindy M]

Asked this before...
First time at mall, on a busy Friday night, unisex restroom was occupied and I couldn't make myself walk in the womens. I held it.
Second time at the mall, on Black Friday, there was no way I was walking in a crowded womens bathroom, and the unisex was occupied. I waited about 10 minutes till 2 women and a little boy came out. Finally....
Use the one you are dressed for and get out quickly. Don't forget to sit down to do your business. One day, I'll muster the courage to go in. What really sucked was watching my SO smile back at me as she walked in... knowing I had frozen. But hey! I was at the mall

[jackie g]

That's a great question and good to be thinking ahead! Use the restroom that matches how you're dressed (like Dana said).

My first time out was to a busy night club out of town. I was staying at a hotel and came with a friend who then left and went back home early. I was alone, and had had a few drinks .....was dressed a little racier (enthusiastically?) than I might now .....and didn't know which one I should use .....I was wobbling on my 4 inch heel knee high boots with a drink in one hand and a purse in the other, hoping my wig would stay on straight. The men's room on the second floor was quiet and all clear. I relieved myself, but then when I was checking myself in the mirror, in came a new "friend" (or so he thought) in the same condition as me (or maybe worse) and he looked like he couldn't believe his good fortune .....it was a little awkward and even a little scary at the time ....the ladies room is more appropriate and the clientele there is generally more accepting too. Since then I've gone out to plays, concerts, dinner, shows, night clubs, whatever and always use the ladies room. One advantage is the private stalls -- I'm in and do my business in complete privacy and then I'm out as fast as possible. Often no one notices. When they do, they either ignore me, or seem supportive. Women are cool!

[ArleneRaquel]

When out of the house and dressed enfemme I use the Ladies room, so far no problems. :)

[Nicole Brown]

I totally agree with Arlene, when Nicole is out she always uses the ladies room.

[S. Lisa Smith]

You won't get an argument from me, I use the bathroom that corresponds to how I'm dressed. Don't forget to wash your hands and check your hair and makeup!!

[StaceyJane]

This has been asked about 1000 times. Go the the bathroom that matches how you are dressed.
Just don't forget when you are and aren't en femme.

[Dana7]

On the very few occasions I have gone out enfemme, I used the ladies' room and got out quickly. They were usually unoccupied, so I didn't see anyone while in there. But in discussions like these I have also heard that if anyone challenges you for any reason, then just apologize and get the heck out of there. There is a good discussion about that on the Diva Las Vegas site.

And never use the ladies room if only partially dressed. That goes without saying.

[Vanessa Storrs]

I love going out dressed and have no problems going almost anywhere, except to the ladies room. I have used the ladies a few times with no problems but have always been afraid of setting off the Transvestite Alarm. I'll work up my courage when I go out this weekend. and try to remember not to sak where the urinals are.

[Cynthia Anne]

I used the ladys! Here a couple of months ago a lady held the door for me as I was entering! I smiled and thanked her! Hugs!

[docrobbysherry]

Then, use which ever one management suggests!:D

[kerrianne]

Now NYC has laws in place regarding this exact issue. The law is use the restroom based on the gender your expressing. Othrr parts of NY id say get in to the ladies room if dressed, but quickly leave

[xcdmargo]

I always go for the family restroom first. I have yet to use the ladies restroom in public places yet and that's mainly because in some states it's illegal. I also do not want to cause some Mom to have to explain to her children why I'm in the ladies room should I get noticed.
It does make sense to me that using the mens room while dressed would cause much more concerns so what to do.
In clubs and bars where there are other girls I just ask them or the bartender.
I must say to that when I've had to wait for the family room and other women have seen me no one has ever even raised an eyebrow. If I can work up the courage and can do it calmly I'm going to try using the womens room

[Acastina]

I've always used the ladies room when dressed and out. I lived full-time for several years and really got used to it. I agree with the comments about using the one you're dressed for at the time, and that if you're sorta half and half (as in genderf**k), you probably should default to the boys room. I've been to drag events where most of the queens just tromped into the mens room and used the urinals, but that's a very different thing from sincerely trying to present as female in public.

A few tips: Women generally are a lot less uptight about bathrooms than men, so try to relax and act as if you belong there. A little smile helps a lot. Obviously, wait your turn and be polite (but guard against chivalrous gestures). Close and latch the stall door. Sit down (amazing that anyone has to be told this, but there you are). Make realistic sounds (very important). If your stream shoots forward a bit, point Mr. Happy down so you hear it hitting the water. Women don't have the muscles to force a squirt, so be patient. Rattle the TP holder a bit at the appropriate time, and dab it dry while still seated, then stand up and pull your beloved girl clothes back up/down. Wash your hands (girls are so much cleaner) and by all means have a look in the mirror. Not a good time to pile on another layer of beard cover, but a little touch-up here and there is normal behavior.

As for all the male fantasies of things they might see in there, I think I've seen one half-slip adjustment in years and years and hundred of occasions...

If you're challenged by someone, I find an indignant "I beg your pardon" will assert your right to be there and put your accuser off-balance. Should you ever be confronted by law enforcement or security, calmly explain that you felt it would be much more disorderly to enter the men's room dressed as you are, and that you only sought to do what everybody else does in there. Nature calls, after all...

[Beth Mays]

never been out dressed... but have walk into womens, lift the seat and let'r rip.
Wife and I were on cruse, the doors were not marked as well as I was would have like, add a few beers... hear more than a few women giggle. after my wife came out of same restroom she look at me and say " i knew it was you"

[Dana7]

A few tips: Women generally are a lot less uptight about bathrooms than men, so try to relax and act as if you belong there. A little smile helps a lot. Obviously, wait your turn and be polite (but guard against chivalrous gestures). Close and latch the stall door. Sit down (amazing that anyone has to be told this, but there you are). Make realistic sounds (very important). If your stream shoots forward a bit, point Mr. Happy down so you hear it hitting the water. Women don't have the muscles to force a squirt, so be patient. Rattle the TP holder a bit at the appropriate time, and dab it dry while still seated, then stand up and pull your beloved girl clothes back up/down. Wash your hands (girls are so much cleaner) and by all means have a look in the mirror. Not a good time to pile on another layer of beard cover, but a little touch-up here and there is normal behavior.

If you're challenged by someone, I find an indignant "I beg your pardon" will assert your right to be there and put your accuser off-balance. Should you ever be confronted by law enforcement or security, calmly explain that you felt it would be much more disorderly to enter the men's room dressed as you are, and that you only sought to do what everybody else does in there. Nature calls, after all...

Excellent summary, Acastina! These are all very good points to remember, especially the noises part. Girls sound quite a bit different than boys.

[noeleena]

Hi,

Iv just realised another side to this, i can only use the womens loos , tho most of the time im wearing skirts. normal dress for me .
Now then if i were wearing my overalls doing a job or what ever, & quite often do. tho the give away would be my head wear .= scarve,most times being pink, those who know me it does not matter , if some women who dont know come in to the loo while im there, what might be said. would i pass as a woman....
no make up this masculine looking woman.. oh dear i did not think about that one. bit late now of cause . any way just my thoughts,

Okay . about 8 weeks ago , i took our Dejarn our grandkid to the swimming pool. went in no probs talked with 3 supervisers . & when it was time to get her dryed & dressed, we were in the womens changing room& i talked with two other women at the time, one lady superviser said it might be better to use another changeing room because some thing was said to her by another woman concerning myself, i sort of figgered she did not think i was a woman. any way i told her i was actually a women & she sort of was taken aback ......ooops . any way she was called away, due to a detail that came up.. so soon after we dejarn & i left.

3 weeks ago i went back & had a lovely talk with the two women managers tho i did not know then they knew who i was any way. & knew my background & both said to me we did not see you ( meaning me ) as any thing other than a....woman.... oh .....wow..... so i left my profile & wrote a nice letter as well for those who work there to read so they know . if this ever comes up again or some one thinks im other than a true woman. that they know i am..

This is another way that i have been showing others that some of us are different & we can be part of socity & be accepted. so a little time well spent in helping others to learn about us as people . my profile is on the net so just use my name to read that ,for those of you who would like to. At the time i did not menton about being I S. because there was no point then,



...noeleena...

[SmileS12]

I never get tired of reading this forum question. Although probably present 1000 times, sometime it disappears before the new folks get to read it. I know since I've been a member I think it was in September, and most folks always say go to the one your dressed for, as to not confuse those that do not understand. I've never seen one of those Family restrooms, and only seen a unisex room in a hospital, one time I went to Wal-Mart dressed, and went to the ladies room with my SO, did the business and left rather quickly, of course after tossing my hair, and viewing makeup, etc..i think I re-did my eyeliner quickly and left. Believe me it never stops my SO when I'm in boymode to come in and ask me if I'm done in the Men's room, and she is all female, so if I'm dressed, why should it bother me to go into the ladies room, I look like a lady, feel like a lady, so, the parts that noone see's should not be questioned. Definitely do what all these kind people say, go to the ladies room and although moving quickly, and sitting to do business, don't look like a rushed fool neither, that would just be a dead give-a-way. LOL
Hope you have fun out.

Toodles,
Trudy

[Kate Simmons]

I guess it basically depends on your confidence level, one way or the other.:)

[DeniseIndy58]

Well most times when I go out dressed its a Drag bar or gay bar of some sort in the Gat com. so its not much of a prob. pick and chose what one has the shorter line/ But when in the gen. pub type thing I try not to go but have been tould you could use the Ladies room. lot of times the are one person rooms any way. and if the are bigger rooms as long as your not actting like a perv go in and out do your biz and dont stand for heaven sakes. you wont be inthere long enough for anyone to realy notice.

[gender_blender]

Personally, whichever is closest. (Sometimes I just wanna stand and pee.)
I'd recommend being realistic and weighing how you may be percieved by others before determining which to use. Once you figure that out, walk in like you own the place.

[drag n fly]

Personally, whichever is closest. (Sometimes I just wanna stand and pee.)
I'd recommend being realistic and weighing how you may be percieved by others before determining which to use. Once you figure that out, walk in like you own the place.
Charlie...I can see you having a problem with either choice..The women would be jealous of you (you're absolutely gorgeous) and the men would be astounded that such a beauty had male equipment...You're beautiful...smooches Jackie

[Sarasometimes]

I say plan ahead. If that fails to avoid a needed trip in order of preference; a unisex, family, Womens single seater (almost all Starbucks have these), regular womens. I get in and get out doing the minimum.

[Nigella]

Kelly, I appreciate that you are new to the forum, but please use the search facility as this topic is very well covered :)