sandra-leigh
12-10-2011, 01:43 AM
I had my regularly scheduled appointment with one of the doctors in my trans-health team today.
Just to rule out a possibility for a marginally high reading, the doctor wanted to check for possible prostate blockage, which, if present, would be signaled by an enlarged prostate -- a prostate exam. In say, 2 minutes?
Oh, okay, I wasn't expecting that, but I could deal. I had one once before and it was no problem at all for me. I have heard that some people really hate them and find them very painful, but I had no concerns.
He outlined the basic procedure, gave me a sheet to cover my lower half, and told me to get ready while he went to get one of the nurses to observe. Standard procedure, he told me, when intimate exams are given to female patients.
To which I asked myself, "Huh? What's he talking about?"
And then, of course, I realized where I was and the context: that I was there exactly as a male-to-female patient, and, By Golly, they were treating me as female.
So the exam went ahead with the female nurse as a witness. It only took a small number of seconds, and no prostate problem was found. The doctor, in remarking about it being fine, added that my prostate was practically non-existent.
The part that felt strange at the time was just in having the female protocols named as being applied. A strange feeling for me because although I know I am not "man", I don't tend to think of myself as "female".
There is, I would mention here, a subtle but distinct and sometimes marked psychological difference between dealing with things as a "woman", compared to dealing with them as a "female". One can get through a fair bit of life more on the "woman" side, and yet not having thought much about "female".
This situation is, of course, partly a matter of "practice": as I enter in to more situations as "female", the thought will settle in and no longer seem strange. But there is time yet: I've only known myself as transgender for about 2 1/2 years, only about 2% of my life so far.
Just to rule out a possibility for a marginally high reading, the doctor wanted to check for possible prostate blockage, which, if present, would be signaled by an enlarged prostate -- a prostate exam. In say, 2 minutes?
Oh, okay, I wasn't expecting that, but I could deal. I had one once before and it was no problem at all for me. I have heard that some people really hate them and find them very painful, but I had no concerns.
He outlined the basic procedure, gave me a sheet to cover my lower half, and told me to get ready while he went to get one of the nurses to observe. Standard procedure, he told me, when intimate exams are given to female patients.
To which I asked myself, "Huh? What's he talking about?"
And then, of course, I realized where I was and the context: that I was there exactly as a male-to-female patient, and, By Golly, they were treating me as female.
So the exam went ahead with the female nurse as a witness. It only took a small number of seconds, and no prostate problem was found. The doctor, in remarking about it being fine, added that my prostate was practically non-existent.
The part that felt strange at the time was just in having the female protocols named as being applied. A strange feeling for me because although I know I am not "man", I don't tend to think of myself as "female".
There is, I would mention here, a subtle but distinct and sometimes marked psychological difference between dealing with things as a "woman", compared to dealing with them as a "female". One can get through a fair bit of life more on the "woman" side, and yet not having thought much about "female".
This situation is, of course, partly a matter of "practice": as I enter in to more situations as "female", the thought will settle in and no longer seem strange. But there is time yet: I've only known myself as transgender for about 2 1/2 years, only about 2% of my life so far.