I went to the doctor yesterday

[Sarah Jayne]

I have been crossdressing since before I was 10, I got busted pretty early, my sister caught me with her makeup on. I have purged so many times, and always kept it hidden, sometimes gone out with boots on under my jeans, panties, bra under a thick hoodie but always in the dead of night.

Over the last 12 months my crossdressing has intensified, my wardrobe expanded, I bought breastforms, I joined this forum, a female friend asked me the other week if I had been wearing eye makeup as I had not been able to get all of it off. My head has been in a spin. I went to see a doctor yesterday, I was having panic attacks in the waiting room, but for the first time I have said to someone face to face I am a cross dresser and I need to work out what it really means to me, how Sarah Jayne features in my life alongside my male persona, I have often wanted low dose HRT and always too terrified or ashamed to take the next step. The relief was incredible. I now have a referral to a psychiatrist specializing in gender issues and first appointment booked for the new year.

To celebrate I took the dog for a walk around the block, I was wearing panties and had a bra on under my hoodie, I was literally about to walk into my front yard when my neighbour stopped me for a chat.

What a week and its still only Tuesday

Needed to share

[Melody1985]

Thank you very much for sharing your story.

I have recently, as of last night had a friend ask me if I had on eye makeup.. Apparently I did not wipe all my mascara or eye liner off like I thought and it ran a bit. So, given I'm in an early (denial) stage, I just say "no", and when he asks what it is, I respond "I don't know.." Lol So anyway, I can relate to that part for sure.

And congrats on telling your doctor.. I'm sure this is the right step for you, and I hope you get all the answers and support you need.

Later!!

[Donniesr]

Don't worry, I'm sure your neighbor didn't see your bra..they don't show much under a hoody..I wear mine just under a t shirt and it doesn't show..
Just keep on posting..you will find alot of friends here..
the only stupid question is the one not asked..

[Sarah Jayne]

Thanks for the replies. Reading some of the other posts on here I think there will come a time me and my wardrobe are fully out the closet and heading back to the mall together to indulge in some shopping together.