When Dressed Are you in one place long enough to be studied andchecked out carefully?

[Beverley Sims]

By this I mean, riding on public transport, restaraunt for lunch hairdresser etc.
I am enduring this on the tube in London at the moment.
It is good therapy and helps my confidence heaps.
For those that don't know the seating arrangement on the tube (Underground railway.) is one row of seats opposite each other with standing room in the middle.
When it is quiet you are sitting looking at the person opposite you.
Nothing is ever said, but one day I had missed a spot on my face, shaving.
I got some longer lingering looks than usual, so I chickened out when the pressure became too great and got off the train.
What have you experienced? especially you UK girls.
It must assist your confidence in some way.

[TxKimberly]

By this I mean, riding on public transport, restaraunt for lunch hairdresser etc.
I am enduring this on the tube in London at the moment.
It is good therapy and helps my confidence heaps.
For those that don't know the seating arrangement on the tube (Underground railway.) is one row of seats opposite each other with standing room in the middle.
When it is quiet you are sitting looking at the person opposite you.
Nothing is ever said, but one day I had missed a spot on my face, shaving.
I got some longer lingering looks than usual, so I chickened out when the pressure became too great and got off the train.
What have you experienced? especially you UK girls.
It must assist your confidence in some way.

Does spending countless 6 to 18 hour days in airports and airplanes count? ;)

[Miranda-E]

By this I mean, riding on public transport, restaraunt for lunch hairdresser etc.
I am enduring this on the tube in London at the moment.
.

you get used to it.
oh, and planes count :)

[Karren H]

Karrens Passing Postulary... The faster you go the more passable you are. As you approach the speed of light... Passability goes to infinity.

[AllieSF]

yes, I am stationary all the time and get studied by others and I study them right back, normally in a detailed conversation. I have been on public transportation and planes. So, once you get used to it, it really is no big deal. The big deal is to get to that confidence level.

[Jorja]

I don't know if I am stationary that long or not but I do hold a Stationary Engineer License. ;)

[Tasha McIntyre]

Hi Beverley, I quite often have lunch at the shopping mall and have experienced a fair bit of "checking out", which is always amusing. I counter a stare with a big smile and have never had a bad reaction.


Does spending countless 6 to 18 hour days in airports and airplanes count? ;)

You bet it does Kimberly. :)

[noeleena]

Hi,

It goes with out saying im studied no matter where i go. & theres no mistakeing what i am. what i wear stands out some what. i just dont blend in & never will. airports transport shops walking around , parks even bike rideing ,

Tho my thinking is people are getting used to me now tho not those who are new to our areas, well they will.

Facial wise if my looks were more female then i may be different in how im seen . & theres no change going to happen there, so for myself im a woman whos different & i get on with life, & any way i dont mind,

...noeleena...

[Cynthia Anne]

Karrens Passing Postulary... The faster you go the more passable you are. As you approach the speed of light... Passability goes to infinity.

Ha,ha ha! I like that!
I know I'm 'studied' in hair salons and the doctors office while waiting! But My signature says it all!

[Beth Mays]

"stationary" what is that? faster man, faster... PlesdeSignHere..HaveaGoodDay!

[Kristy_K]

I will have to try the speed of light approach one day. I like that idea.

I get more than my shares of people checking me out. As I am 6'2" without heels and I usually wear heels. Plus I am not very passable no matter how cute my outfit is. The guys usually look the other way and most of the girls gives me a cute little smile and sometimes they even come up to me and say I have a lot of courage to be in public and to keep it up. I have also found out that people can't forget me no matter how hard they try.

[ReneeT]

Does spending countless 6 to 18 hour days in airports and airplanes count? ;)

So true! The time of most scrutiny is when you are zone 4 for boarding and your seat is at the back of a crowded plane. As you shuffle very slowly back, all 250 people have the chance to study you carefully from an unflattering angle.....

[Lori B]

Karrens Passing Postulary... The faster you go the more passable you are. As you approach the speed of light... Passability goes to infinity. .............. lmao!:heehee:

[Jlake2121]

How fast is the mirror going?

[Cheryl T]

Sure, we go out to the movies, restaurants and malls all the time. I know for sure I'm in one spot long enough when I'm scouring a sale rack for a cute top or skirt.
I was nervous at first...but after a few times and the help of a friend (thanks Becky) I'm no longer concerned, or ashamed of who I am.

[Rogina B]

The best is in a checkout line with four teenage girls under your chin..lol

[linda allen]

"When Dressed Are you in one place long enough to be studied andchecked out carefully? "

I don't get out often, but recently, I decided to gas up my vehicle in a cute dress and heels (it was night time though). This activity sticks you in one spot for several minutes. It was a rush for me but nothing was said by anyone else.

Other than that, I've pretty much kept moving except sitting on the bench in the mall for a few minutes.

[KlaireLarnia]

By this I mean, riding on public transport, restaraunt for lunch hairdresser etc.
I am enduring this on the tube in London at the moment.
It is good therapy and helps my confidence heaps.
For those that don't know the seating arrangement on the tube (Underground railway.) is one row of seats opposite each other with standing room in the middle.
When it is quiet you are sitting looking at the person opposite you.
Nothing is ever said, but one day I had missed a spot on my face, shaving.
I got some longer lingering looks than usual, so I chickened out when the pressure became too great and got off the train.
What have you experienced? especially you UK girls.
It must assist your confidence in some way.

On the way home from a work trip just before xmas I had to go for a 5 hour train ride and part of that was across london to get the connecting train home.

I was part dressed - female trousers, bra, breast forms, t-shirt and 1inch calf boots. I did have a male jacket on as I have no female coats and was being picked up the other side by someone who does not know I dress (I had my work shoes in my rucksack to swap into before I got off the train and my work clothes where in my overnight bag and removed the breast forms, I am often seen in women's jeans even by family).

Crossing London on the tube I was VERY concious of the looks and some made me feel very uncomfortable but this was the first time I ever did a train ride of this length dressed in obviously female clothes and more importantly boots - so it was a new experience.

Would I do it again? Yes without hesitation. Will I feel concious of it again, yes but I know it is something I have to do. Next time I am considering 2-3inch heeled boots as they will be more obvious and also more to my taste. The boots I wore where done to give me stability as well as comfort having never worn women's boots for more than 30 mins at a time, so jumping to 5-6 hours was a major thing.

I have worn female things in public before but this felt the most natural as the other times where me mostly hidden in a car. I make sure that what I wore looked right and balanced and just went for it. A male wearing female clothes (I never wear makeup, hair, nails etc to try and mask I am a male with grade 2/3 hair).

In January I have two more trips at the moment, I am looking forward to both as they will be on trains due to a medical driving ban after a serious fall - so it will let me see how people deal with me better as well.

[Valerie1973]

I don't always go out dressed en femme, but when I do I prefer to be quick as I can be, they'll never suspect me.

[Launa]

I've only been out once and was noticed within seconds. My big expensive ball gown and fur coat might have had something to do with it. lol

[Chickhe]

...bike riding, driving, roller blading....not so much for not being read as you race past, but they offer a quick getaway.

[Jenniferathome]

I think being viewable for more than a few seconds is enough for the average person to read a crossdresser, regardless of how "close" to passing we might like to think we are. Men and woman's faes are, on average,inherently different. The jaw line and Adam's apple in particular are so different, on average that the "tell" is there for anyone paying attention. Next,add in height, width, hand size and the cues are there for causing anyone to take notice. I think the best the average can hope for is to cause confusion, "Is that a guy in a dress...?". To me,it would be the very rare man who has very,very feminine features across the whole spectrum of their person that can pass with impunity. None of this, however, should cause anyone a second thought about going out. People simply don't care or notice. confidence is the key. If you don't care, they don't care.

[Samantha W]

My outings are getting longer and longer. Mysafe zone is expanding as well as the number of people I am "out" to. So I get looked lot now. I dont pass. I gave up on that. Now I just try to look my best. I get many compiments from the "normal" people. Right now I am sitting in the lobby of the Days Inn, Uof M campus. The lobby is full of people that have to know I am a CD, but no one cares.

[Nikki A.]

I do go to brunch after church at a diner, so I am sitting there. I also do shop sometimes dressed and I know I'm read, but so far no problems and I don't really care.

[Lorileah]

A tilt of the head and a smile and maybe whispering "Hi how are you" does a lot. Yes I am in public places stationary often when I go out.

[KlaireLarnia]

None of this, however, should cause anyone a second thought about going out. People simply don't care or notice. confidence is the key. If you don't care, they don't care.

I think this is part of the key to cross dressing beyond the confines of your home. When I was travelling through London trying to go from the north side to the south so I could get the connecting train home - I was inevitably spotted and I heard some smirks which I am sure where aimed at me. But at the end of the day I was not that bothered. Because a) I had a train to catch and therefore more important things on my mind, and b) because I wear a combination of male and female clothes so I am not seen as a man trying to pass as a woman, but most definitely as a man in women's clothes - look at almost any Eddie Izzard stand-up show and you get the idea of how I look minus the lipstick..

I think if you apply common sense to what you do - you will find people (less a few teenagers/kids in their early 20's) are not interested in you. They, like you, have more important things to do and worry about. As Jennifer said, if you are confident in how you hold yourself then people will tend to leave you alone or pass comment quietly so you do not hear it.

I am looking forward to my next train journey for work. My aim to to be in the clothes I want for the whole of the journey to where I need to go, all the time in the hotel and all the way home. It will add to my own confidence in what I am doing.

[suchacutie]

Just to note: at the speed of light, you ARE light :)

I've written here about a couple of encounters that I've had with CDers where I've noticed them but no one else in the room or on the train did. One CDer was in Starbucks and we were in line for most of the 15 min that she was there. We are still rare enough that someone really has to take the time to notice and few do or even care! Having said that, the younger generation are much more in tune with gender and I think that's why they pick up on it so much more easily.

Barring that, especially as one gets older, I do think it's possilbe to minimize the male "signals" and to override them with feminine "signals", even when in an enclosed area for a period of time, but the best is to not be concerned about whether we are read or not. Having a feminine side is NOT a crime and is really nobody's business! I really do think that when the current young generation is in their 60's the climate will have so changed that no one will give mixed genders a second thought...or at least we can hope :)

tina

[Eryn]

Karrens Passing Postulary... The faster you go the more passable you are. As you approach the speed of light... Passability goes to infinity.

And, you get really thin! Bonus!

I do spend time in situation where people can get a long look at me. Restaurants, concerts, etc.

I rely upon the fact that nobody really knows for certain. Yes, someone may suspect that the tall person sitting there might be a man, but can they tell for sure? I'm a CDer, I know what to look for, and I've never been *absolutely* sure about someone presenting as female being a male. Any mundane trying to figure it out will soon get bored and turn their attention to their food, the music, etc.

Now, there are situations where the viewers might be impulsive enought to say something, namely the proverbial kids, teens, and drunks. I try to avoid those situations. No Justin Bieber concerts for this gal! :)

Another situation is where I am with a large group of CDers. Put a dozen 6'+ ladies dressed a bit too nicely in an LGBT-friendly restaurant and you're not going to blend! Everybody knows and this is liberating in its own way!

[gender_blender]

Yes, but usually surrounded by photographers and my makeup artist and clothing designers. Or in public, people recognize me from online photoshoots, presentations or burlesque shows I've done recently.

[Beverley Sims]

Yes, but usually surrounded by photographers and my makeup artist and clothing designers. Or in public, people recognize me from online photoshoots, presentations or burlesque shows I've done recently.

The only thing I can be picky about here is photo shoots is two words. You lucky! @#$%^&. Go for it and all the success you can generate for yourself.
Happy New Year from Narvik

[Kaz]

Life on the tube in London is mental. Don't get off for feeling of pressure. What is in their heads is nothing to do with you! Everyone on the tube is just thinking about making their next station or what they are going to do next, or... in some cases just nothing!

Ride the tube... enjoy... it is the worst experience and nobody likes it!

What you must never do is look someone in the eye... if you happen to do that... it does happen... immediately divert your gaze and pretend to be looking somewhere else.... then drift back and smile.. or you could just say "Hi I am an American"... you may or may not get smiled at back. Of course the minute you open your mouth they will know and there you are!

Many Americans go to London and think this is the UK... like NY is America... yeah?

Like... I just did Europe! Yeah, tell me about it...