Ponderous

[Midnight_Minx]

I have seen a re-occuring theme throughout many posts, and thought I would post this for everyone's thoughts on it.

Why, in your opinion, would women feel threatened, or otherwise repulsed that a man wishes to mimic the appearance of a woman? The reverse does not apply to them, as there are many that frequently wear men's clothing, boxers, etc, and openly do so.

Yet, if a man crosses their line, it's almost as if we have delivered one of the most disgusting insults to them. (of course, this isn't all women -- I know several that think it's great, that a man wants to get in touch with his feminine side).

Society even doesn't react to the fact of women cutting their hair short like a man, or wearing male clothing.

Any thoughts?

Luv

~Viv~

[susandrea]

I think it's the same knee-jerk reaction some intolerant people have in regards to gay people.

It's not what they see as "acceptable" and therefore it's to be repulsed.

Religious background may have something to do with it, but it can just be a social thing.

I find that the most intolerant people are from the more ignorant and/or hung up crowd. (Duh!)

A WIFE finding her husband cross-dressed, especially if she had no idea, is a different matter, though. There are many more layers attached to that. How a wife reacts to such a thing, how she handles it, says quite a bit about her character in general. I'm not trying to be judgmental, but I find that people who freak out easily will do so no matter WHAT the cause is, whether it's a hubby in a dress, a flooded basement, or a daughter marrying another woman. Some people can deal with things, others can't.

You are right when you say there are women who think it's great that a man is in touch with his feminine side, but I bet there are plenty who are apathetic about it.

Also, at one time a woman with short hair, short dresses (even showing their ankles), and in pants (also working or voting) was a HUGE scandal, and they had to fight for every inch, every privilege, every right.

[Phoebe Reece]

Sometimes I think it is simple jelousy. The very idea that sometimes a man can actually make a better looking woman than the real thing can be threatening to some GG's, especially those that have a poor self image.

[Midnight_Minx]

I truly feel sorry for those who are caught in these type of situations. It is also depressing to see that society is so full of people who are ignorant, intolerant, or just otherwise judgemental, on nothing more than their own opinions.

To any of my fellow sisters here, who are having to go through this, or having to keep their life a secret, I give you all my strength and support, and wish you the best in it all. ^_^

I wonder if it also has to do with generation. -- for example, my fiance (we're to be married in February 2006!) loves it, and supports it. Then again, she is 2 years older than me. Exploring your feminine side was quite frowned upon in the previous generation, if I remember correctly. Also, as you stated Susandrea, religion probably plays a major role in effecting people's understanding and acceptance to things.

Luv

~Viv~

[Midnight_Minx]

Sometimes I think it is simple jelousy. The very idea that sometimes a man can actually make a better looking woman than the real thing can be threatening to some GG's, especially those that have a poor self image.

lol ^_^ Sadly, I think that self image does play a role too -- and we can blame a society that dwells on the aspect that a female has to look a certain way, and keep a certain body style to be "beautiful".

*wanders off to club society about the head with a sledgehammer*

Luv

~Viv~

[Ellaine]

Vivian :) I think it's the expectation that a man is expected to aspire to be as manly as possible and tough, willing to fight for and protect his woman. For a man to abdicate this responsibility is one thing, but to go over the line into emulating femininity is too much for many women. The bulky muscular, not over developed body is still the ideal image for most women.

On the other hand, a woman who goes boyish is just as in danger of alienating suiters as the male counterpart. She escapes the same kind of ridicule though, because she aspires to be the traditionally more advantaged sex.

Traditional (old fashioned ) attitudes, but deeply ingrained and logical.

But you knew that didn't you? ;)


Hugs Ellaine

[Julie York]

It's quite simple really.

It's all about sex. The whole uncomfortable business is about sex. If it had nothing to do with sex then it would simply be an outragious fashion wouldn't it? Just some guy wearing some silly clothing? But the clothing is 'owned' by the female identity.

And most CDs sexualise the image in an exagerated manner BECAUSE it is to do with sex and by doing so, they warp the image of how women see themselves and it becomes insulting to them.

If Female to Male were exaggerating the male form, the male sex signals, the male 'character' to the point where they were some sort of ridiculous gay characerture* of how an average man sees himself...then men would be annoyed, insulted and hurt by it too.

The other thing that is easy to forget is that it is a mind set completely outside 'normal' thought and appears to be some sort of mental illness if someone comes across it all of a sudden with no understanding of it. It's like someone coming home to find their husband dressed as a gorilla and humping the sofa. And they've been secretly doing this while she was at work! It makes no sense, is alarming, very scary and sickening because it has a sexual element. (Well until you find www.sofagorillas.com forum anyway).

It can be sanitised by declaring that "Oh inside I am a woman" and getting in touch with your feminine side....which I do believe we do in varying ways...but at the very base of the urge there is something 'unsavoury' that women are not stupid about and feel uncomfortable with.

The logic is quite sound. A guy is just wearing clothes.....so what? But they aren't fooled. They can FEEL that there's more to it than that and it isn't THEM that this feeling is aimed at.

Raise your hand if you are a fully out TS "woman inside" and didn't get a "kick" out of dressing up, in your teens, in your 20s, right now! that hit a deep down nerve somewhere right in your groin?



Yeah exactly.


And that's why women feel uncomfortable with it all.





* you spell it then!

.

[TGMarla]

There is another aspect to it as well. When my wife raids my closet, she isn't strapping some kind of restraint around her chest to make sure she appears to not have breasts. Neither is she wearing a jockstrap filled with socks or something to emulate a "package" between her legs. Furthermore, she isn't putting on a "guy" wig that makes it appear that she has short hair. Yet, crossdressers routinely wear breastforms, wigs, and gaffs to make themselves emulate and appear as genetic women. So it's not all about the clothes. It goes much further than that.

Just admit it.