But Why?

[KrystalA]

I've seen quite a few threads here concerning 'dressing age-appropriate', and I can't help but ask myself why. If I were to dress appropriately for my age, I'd have to wear granny panties and a frumpy ol' house dress. Right now, I'm wearing a pink turtle neck sweater and a cute wrap skirt that comes about halfway down to my knees, and 4" heels. I've been told that my legs look good, and although my face could never 'pass' as female, I love wearing clothes that are more designed for someone half my age or younger. In my opinion, I'd say appropriate dress is whatever makes you feel the way you want to feel. What d'you think? :battingeyelashes:

[StevieTV]

You raise a valid point. If you are not trying to pass, I feel you should wear what ever you feel like. Now if you are trying to pass, I'm a firm believer of blending. Where I live you will never see 4+" heels, micro minis, etc in a mall, yet you will see slacks, skirts, blouses and sweaters. Age appropriate shouldn't equate to "frumpy". Like I said this is my opinion.

[sammysaenz]

I agree girl. Wear what makes you happy.

[Cheryl T]

Those discussion are aimed at those of us who do go out in public and are concerned about "passing".
If you dress like a little girl (I have seen that in a local Dress Barn) or try to wear styles that are much too young for your obvious age then you will draw undesired attention and certainly not "pass".
It's not a proposal that you wear clothing that is fitting for your age, but a suggestion that you don't dress in a manner that a "tell" to those around you.

I remember when I first joined Tri-Ess. We have an outing to the movies and dinner every so often and our president would obtain the tickets in advance. Some couldn't make it that night and she had to return some of them. As we stood around waiting for her to do so we could see a group of young girls pointing, giggling and such. They were looking at us. All this happened as our president (dressed for her age...something of the little old lady style) walked past them, heard their comments and giggled herself that she went unnoticed. She told us about it when she came back. Just shows you how you can fit in if you look the part.
Same goes for those who want to become "WalMartians" and wear mini skirts and 4" heels to shop at WalMart. You can bet you will be noticed and not slip under the radar, but then again, some of us apparently prefer to push the envelope.

[Launa]

Well I think you should do what you want. I know I wouldn't pass either but in my case I am dressing age appropriate because it feels great and I want to do it. So what does that mean? I have seen lots of mature women who look outstanding such as Helen Muiren, Jane Fonda, Isabella Rossolini, Meryl Streep just to name a few and those girls rock! Just because your older it doesn't mean you have to wear some pilgrim dress from the 1800's like your going to church or the older lady who shops at K-mart who wears shirts with embroided flowers on the front collar and fat persons slacks with a big gunt. However I'm never going out wearing a grad dress like a teeny bopper because of my age unless its some kind of a preformance show or something goofy. I do have some nice ruffly gowns that look good on me.

[Maria 60]

You are so right, and for myself i never go out in public so my legs are my best fetcher so i might as well show them and God knows i love to show them, but if i had to go out in public i don't think i would like to draw that type of attention and it wouldn't look age appropriate.

[prettytoes]

I like to dress in clothes typically worn by girls far younger than my age. I do not go out dressed, I keep it in the house. I dress because it relaxes me and makes me feel complete. I prefer mini skirts, short sweater dresses with tights, etc. I do not like, or feel comfortable in "granny panties", it's satin bikinis for me! When I paint my toenails I like to use very bright, vibrant colors that are normally seen on younger women.
I dress in what feels comfortable, makes me happy, and makes me feel good!

[StephanieC]

I'm not sure this is always a black-and-white question. What is "appropriate" and even "age-appropriate" has different meanings to different people. A lot has to do with the setting, weather, etc as well as thing like the cut of the outfit, body type, etc. I've seen 4 inch platforms worn with pants by female financial accounts at work and I've seen older woman in skirts just a little bit shorter than usual or with really attractive patterned tights...so there is a certain "grey area" in the real world. I think "blending" goes beyond attire to attitude, poise, etc. People that have trouble working in heels might bring just as much attention even if they are dress "age appropriate"...so it's not just the clothes. Just don't go to an extreme in any of those aspects. Or perhaps a better suggestion would be "think with a female brain" rather than a "male brain": I think it's usually the "male brain" causes people to go over the top.

[MissMarcie]

Wear whatever you want if you're dressing in the privacy of your home. If you go out in public, use some common sense and try to dress age appropriate and like other women you see in public. This is probably the worst thing about CD's, some want to dress like an 18 year old hottie in public and still hope to pass. Guess what? You're never ever going to pass in public dressed like that.

[KellyJameson]

We present ourselves to the world for affect or from indifference and both are choices, one is conscious the other is not unless you wish it to be so and than it's not. Everything is an expression of the self and each of us decides how we want our worlds to be shaped, we are builders of reality after all. I prefer to shape my world in mini skirts, tight sweaters and four inch heels and stand on corners expounding the virtues of chastity but this is natural because as a child I would burn up unsuspecting ants with my magnifying glass.

[RenneB]

As one from the 'blender' group, I've taken that comment more than once or twice and tryed to incorporate it into my next wardrobe purchase. I still prefer to wear the near-mini skirt but when out to the mall and all, I tend to go with something that will get me to pass at 20 meters. And yes I still prefer to be a member of the 4 inch club and so far have only one pair of boots that is less than 4, I think they're about 2-1/2, while the entire shoe closet of mine is still in the 4 inch range.

Renne.....

[Ellyn]

You do not hear about it often, but there is also "event appropriate" dress. I was recently at a funeral, and there were a couple of ladies there who were borderline on age appropriate, with their short skirts and bright colours. Definately not what I would consider "event appropriate" for attending a funeral. They were in what I would consider to be "party dress. You would stick out like a sore thumb at many social events if you dressed in their manor. Fashionable clothes in subdued colours are best if you want to blend in.

[Marleena]

I love mini skirts and dresses and look good in them but I'm over 50. I only wear them in the house.

Out in public is different, I'm putting together a wardrobe to blend in closer to my age group. Knee length pencil skirts, long tops with leggings etc.

[Miranda-E]

the age part of age appropriate is less important than the APPROPRIATE part.

A 40 year old woman dressed like a teenage tramp doesn't look look a teenager, she looks like a tramp.
sexy and stylish can bed done at any age. Mutton dressed as lamb just looks pathetic.

[DonnaT]

If it looks good on you then wear it.

[linda allen]

I've seen quite a few threads here concerning 'dressing age-appropriate', and I can't help but ask myself why. If I were to dress appropriately for my age, I'd have to wear granny panties and a frumpy ol' house dress. Right now, I'm wearing a pink turtle neck sweater and a cute wrap skirt that comes about halfway down to my knees, and 4" heels. I've been told that my legs look good, and although my face could never 'pass' as female, I love wearing clothes that are more designed for someone half my age or younger. In my opinion, I'd say appropriate dress is whatever makes you feel the way you want to feel. What d'you think? :battingeyelashes:
If you're at home or in private, you can wear anything you want. If you go out in public, you might want to think about what's appropriate for your age, what's appropriate for the place or activity, and what's appropriate for the time of day. That is of course, unless you don't care what people think or just want to wear a sign that says "look at me, I'm a crossdresser".

The next time you are out, dressed or not, observe what women are wearing. Seldom will you see a woman wearing 4: heels and a miniskirt unless she is either very young, or somewhat older, but on her way to, or at a bar or club. An older female dressed like that is apt to be taken for a hooker.

You don't have to dress as a bag lady if you're older, but older women usually wear longer skirts and lower heels.

[jillleanne]

The old saying goes something like this: If you want to look like a ****, dress like a ****. If you want to look like a lady, dress like a lady. There's no right or wrong, only personal choice, but there is perception by others and only you can decide what you prefer and how you define it regardless of what others may define it as.

[CINDYO]

sure you can dress how ever you like if you are just wearing the clothes and not trying to emulate a lady, no problem. As a GG when i see mature women wearing what a 19 year old kid wears i wonder what in heck they are thinking, not to mention how rediculous they look. I figure it is attention seeking, but you are correct wear what ever turns your crank, just not out in public, does not look good:)

[Lorileah]

AAARRRRRRGGGGHHHHH! for a group of people who are asking to be accepted we are the most unaccepting people I know.

Who makes up these rules? The same people who tell you you cannot wear a dress. They are the ones who say that one thing is acceptable while another is not and you buy into it. You can't wear "X" but you can wear "Y" IF you do it in this circumstance. So basically what some of you are saying is "yes you can wear that if you don't go out." It is the same thing you are all complaining about that others tell you.

If you like what you wear and it isn't breaking a law (such as exposure), why should you have to stay indoors? And why would other call you names? What is a "lady"? It is just another societal imposition on a group of people. Well guess what I must dress as a ***** because I will and do wear skirts and dresses that are mid-thigh. Any of you want to tell me to my face? Because I am sure there is something about you that someone will find unacceptable. Can you all spell Hypocrite? Let me help..look in the mirror.

This is something that comes up a lot here. I just want to know which elf died and made you all Mr Keebler? Last time I looked there was no "Old crone" section at the department store. AAARRRGGH

[Marleena]

@ Lorileah, I don't thing anybody is really telling us what to wear. It is our choice, really.

I just don't want any extra attention since I'm new at this. I said I would not wear miniskirts outside of the house due to my age. But if I went to a TG club where other girls were wearing them, I could change my tune quickly.:)

[angeloftheknight]

My SO Nikki likes to dress like a teenager, which is fine in the house, although he has been out like this too. Nikki felt rather uncomfortable because she thought others were looking.

I have had to guide Nikki in appropriate 'outdoor' wear so she can become more comfortable and in doing so she has more confidence. She still dressess like at teenager at home ( and acts like one at times) when the mood takes her.

I'm not saying age appropriate is right or wrong. That is an individual choice. If you are comfortable in what you wear, go for it.

Angel

[Meg East]

Being 6'3" means the four inch heels would make it difficult for me to get through the door ways therefore I save those for home. I have nice legs so I prefer shorter skirts and two inch strappy sandels. I don't try to stand out from the crowd but being tall means I stand above it.

[Sally24]

AAARRRRRRGGGGHHHHH! for a group of people who are asking to be accepted we are the most unaccepting people I know.
Who makes up these rules? Can you all spell Hypocrite? Let me help..look in the mirror.
I just want to know which elf died and made you all Mr Keebler? AAARRRGGH

I really hope you were half joking Lorileah! I reread most of the replies and they appear to describe the publics perception of some one dressing young, not their own opinion.

I sometimes dress very young and very short. That's usually when going to a club. Going out to regular venues and going in the daytime I dress younger than my calendar age but more or less appropriate for my perceived age. That's my choice. I see plenty of GGs wearing clothing and makeup styles that I wouldn't be caught dead in at any age! It's their choice. The OP did ask what everone else thought didn't she? If she prefers it young and short, or sexy and sl**y then thats her choice too.

[ArleneRaquel]

O'll be 64 in 4 days. That being said I dress as a young 40 year old, mini's & shorts are my favorite wearing apparel.

[Beth Mays]

If across the threshold of the front door remember this: wear what looks good on you not what you want to look good in!
And this applies to more than just the art of Crossdressing!

[Debra Russell]

Classy and stylish, at 66 I need to be as close to that image as I can get - but thats my style you can present any way you wish and thats fine.....................Debra

[vivianann]

I am out in public dressed enfemme alot, sometimes I am with other cders, and most of them dresss way younger than their age, I dress more conservative, knee length dresses, and covering my shoulders. I am a peaple watcher so I like to walk a few feet behind the other cders, and you should see the looks of disgust from gg's, when they walk past the cders ahead of me, please dont get mad at me for what I am saying, Iam only telling you all what I see. I have been asked by gg's why my friends dress like ****s, and they tell me that they dont like it because they feel they are being mocked by those cders. We need to take a womans opinion to heart, because it does matter in my opinion. I get alot of compliments fromm gg's on my style of dress, and I have been told by gg's many times that I dress to emulate them, I take their comments to heart because it tells me I am doing things right. On the other hand many cders are critical of the way I dress and I dont wear enough makeup, etc. I am not 100% passable but I blend in well.
I wont be going to anymore crossdressing events anymore because I dont like being discriminated against by the other cders who ostracize me because I dress more like a lady. I get better treatment from society than I get from the crossdressing community. I am over 50, however I dress classy, I like my dresses to my knees, because I do have very nice legs, I could wear shorter dresses, but I like to leave alot more to the imagination. I do wear really short dresses to private parties or events, but I will not wear them out in public.

[kimdl93]

Its really a question of what works for you and where you want to go. I enjoy going out in public, shopping, dining, or just being out interacting with people. To do that, in any given setting I try to dress in a manner that's compatible with women of my age and stature. I won't pass - certainly not close up, but I blend in well enough. At home, I dress pretty much the same way...but that's what feels right for me.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Krysta, It's all just mind over matter.
If you don't mind than it doesn't matter.

Orchid

[Karren H]

Personally..... except for women's jeans and baby girl clothing.... I could care less what anyone else wears! I'll never dress my age, no mater what gender I present..

[Lorileah]

I am a peaple watcher so I like to walk a few feet behind the other cders, and you should see the looks of disgust from gg's, when they walk past the cders ahead of me, please dont get mad at me for what I am saying, Iam only telling you all what I see. I have been asked by gg's why my friends dress like ****s, and they tell me that they dont like it because they feel they are being mocked by those cders. We need to take a womans opinion to heart, because it does matter in my opinion. I get alot of compliments fromm gg's on my style of dress, and I have been told by gg's many times that I dress to emulate them, I take their comments to heart because it tells me I am doing things right. On the other hand many cders are critical of the way I dress and I dont wear enough makeup, etc. I am not 100% passable but I blend in well.

Walk a few paces behind yourself and see the looks you get. Walk a few steps behind any woman who dresses either young OR dressy (Classy as you call it) and watch the reaction of the GG's. My GF always wore heels (except when she was working out). Always. Another thing GG's are not is shy about stating their negative opinions especially to anyone except the person they are negative against. I heard many whisper "She looks like a hooker in those shoes" and "Who does she think she is?" and "All she wants is guys to watch her." Then a minute later walk up to her and tell her how great that dress looked on her. She had "too much make up" (never wore a foundation, ever, so......), her lips were too red (she wore plum colors I was the one with the bright red). Oh and she was "Too skinny." at 5'7" 120. There is a word for that, it is called being "Catty". Your "cd'er" friends are the same way when they tell you what to do.

I wont be going to anymore crossdressing events anymore because I dont like being discriminated against by the other cders who ostracize me because I dress more like a lady. I get better treatment from society than I get from the crossdressing community.
And so you turn that back on them because you don't like how they dress? Glass houses and stones. I don't agree with what others wear either but I still try and be nice to them. And they were not that way to you because of how you dressed. You were in their territory, you could have worn a gunny sack and got the same reaction. I got the same reaction and so did my GF and my Post-op TS friend.

I am over 50, however I dress classy, I like my dresses to my knees, because I do have very nice legs,
Two words that sum up the whole thread. "I LIKE"


I could wear shorter dresses, but I like to leave alot more to the imagination. What exactly does that mean? Why do you think they imagine anything? They probably imagine that you are a crossdresser. If you wear floor length dresses from the 1890's they would really have a field day.

All this "blending" and "Passing" and "Looking like a GG" has nothing to do with what you like to wear. Many people like to wear baggy nondescript clothing. Clothing that hides everything (which must make imaginations run wild all day long). You can blend in easily, wear sweats and tennis shoes. You could be a man or a woman. The official uniform of the masses. Did anyone watch old sci-fi movies? You know the ones like Logan's Run where everyone wears the same thing and you don't have a choice? Little boxes on the hillside.

[jillleanne]

AAARRRRRRGGGGHHHHH! for a group of people who are asking to be accepted we are the most unaccepting people I know.

Who makes up these rules? The same people who tell you you cannot wear a dress. They are the ones who say that one thing is acceptable while another is not and you buy into it. You can't wear "X" but you can wear "Y" IF you do it in this circumstance. So basically what some of you are saying is "yes you can wear that if you don't go out." It is the same thing you are all complaining about that others tell you.

If you like what you wear and it isn't breaking a law (such as exposure), why should you have to stay indoors? And why would other call you names? What is a "lady"? It is just another societal imposition on a group of people. Well guess what I must dress as a ***** because I will and do wear skirts and dresses that are mid-thigh. Any of you want to tell me to my face? Because I am sure there is something about you that someone will find unacceptable. Can you all spell Hypocrite? Let me help..look in the mirror.

This is something that comes up a lot here. I just want to know which elf died and made you all Mr Keebler? Last time I looked there was no "Old crone" section at the department store. AAARRRGGH

lol, true enough but the point here I believe goes something like this: the 'dress appropriate theme', at least in my case, means there is a time and place for everything. I dress en femme to make me feel feminine inside. If I feel the need to dress in a style normally associated with much younger people, I expect to get noticed, not because I want to, but because of how I chose to dress. There are no rules I agree, but there are consequences associated with choice. I choose generally to blend because I do not want to draw attention to myself AND I still feel very feminine inside with my choices.

[Kristy_K]

To be or not to be.... Screw it...... As long as you don't break the law be yourself and have some fun.......

[Stephanie47]

Well, this grannie does NOT wear grannie dresses and grannie panties. I also do not look like my granddaughter. Age appropriate and situation appropriate are two different things. This grannie is NOT trashy looking, either.

[Kaz]

Hmmm, I am 58... I play in 3 rock bands at the moment.. I wear red checky shirts and usually Levis on stage, and red baseball boots... I bounce around as I can't stand still when playing (or lecturing... my main occupation)... I play anything from Chuck Berry to AC/DC to Zeppelin to Bert Jansch to Bonnie Raitt to Bryan Adams to Fleetwood Mac to Free to Aerosmith to the Doors to Jeff Healy to Jeff Beck to Clapton to Joe Bonamassa to Hendrix to Lizzy to Biffy Clyro...

Am I behaving 'age appropriate'?...

I dress with the same attitude...

171554
But I have been known to be more conservative at times!
171555

[ArleneRaquel]

Kaz,
Gorgeous legs & more. You look much younger than 58.

[Emma Leigh]

In my opinion, I'd say appropriate dress is whatever makes you feel the way you want to feel. What d'you think? :battingeyelashes:

I totally agree Krystal, wear what you want hun

[ArleneRaquel]

To me, in many ways, dressing enfemme is living out a lifestyle that is fun, exciting, and totally wonderful.So why not dress as YOU feel & desire.

[Kaz]

Kaz,
Gorgeous legs & more. You look much younger than 58.

Did I never mention that I did a deal with a guy in a painting in my attic? I think his name was Dorian something... it was a very 'grey' day!

And thanks for the kind words...! We do what we can with the canvas we are given...

[ArleneRaquel]

:heehee: Dorian Gray. lol

[Jenniferathome]

Age appropriate does not mean out of style or out of touch. On occasion, I think we have all seen an older natural woman wearing a tight miniskirt or something of that nature and it screams, "I am old." Just the opposite effect that person wanted. Everyone should wear what feels good but know that with age comes some expected sensibility. Call it a double standard if you like, but it is real. There are still plenty of attractive and even sexy options for the older CD. Spandex mini-dresses are for the young and fit girls :-)

[suchacutie]

My wife explained to me that the "rule" should always be that the clothes you wear should make you feel terrific. Of course, she meant the feeling of them as well, but the real meaning is that when you step out in a set of clothes (or stay in, for that matter), they should make you feel like a million dollars! So, if you head to the mall in a micromini with fishnets and incredible cleavage, you might feel less comfortable as time goes on (maybe not, but I sure would). On the other hand, clubbing or just staying in for the evening provides ample opportunity for feeling terrific in whatever wild "costume" one might want to wear.

The bottom line is that if you truly feel terrific about your (femme) self, you probably are "appropriate" :). After all, in drab I would not feel comfortable in my garden clothes heading off to a 5 star restaurant, and I probably would not feel comfortable wearing my spandex running outfit to church. Just sayin :)

tina

[vivianann]

Walk a few paces behind yourself and see the looks you get. Walk a few steps behind any woman who dresses either young OR dressy (Classy as you call it) and watch the reaction of the GG's. My GF always wore heels (except when she was working out). Always. Another thing GG's are not is shy about stating their negative opinions especially to anyone except the person they are negative against. I heard many whisper "She looks like a hooker in those shoes" and "Who does she think she is?" and "All she wants is guys to watch her." Then a minute later walk up to her and tell her how great that dress looked on her. She had "to
o much make up" (never wore a foundation, ever, so......), her lips were too red (she wore plum colors I was the one with the bright red). Oh and she was "Too skinny." at 5'7" 120. There is a word for that, it is called being "Catty". Your "cd'er" friends are the same way when they tell you what to do.

Sounds like when ggs are talking about you, not your girlfriend.

And so you turn that back on them because you don't like how they dress? Glass houses and stones. I don't agree with what others wear either but I still try and be nice to them. And they were not that way to you because of how you dressed. You were in their territory, you could have worn a gunny sack and got the same reaction. I got the same reaction and so did my GF and my Post-op TS friend.


They turned their backs on me and made fun of how I dressed, I did not do that to them, so now I do not have any more use for them. And another thing they were in my teritory.
Two words that sum up the whole thread. "I LIKE"

What exactly does that mean? Why do you think they imagine anything? They probably imagine that you are a crossdresser. If you wear floor length dresses from the 1890's they would really have a field day.


I see alot of women wearing floor length dresses these days, I dont seeanybody making fun of them.



All this "blending" and "Passing" and "Looking like a GG" has nothing to do with what you like to wear. Many people like to wear baggy nondescript clothing. Clothing that hides everything (which must make imaginations run wild all day long). You can blend in easily, wear sweats and tennis shoes. You could be a man or a woman. The official uniform of the masses. Did anyone watch old sci-fi movies? You know the ones like Logan's Run where everyone wears the same thing and you don't have a choice? Little boxes on the hillside.


This last quote does not make any sense, and has nothing to do with what I am talking about. When a middle aged male wears a micro mini spagetti strap dress with his junk visible for all to see and his muscle bound shoulders and legs screaming MAN IN DRESS!, you have to wonder is he that dilusional that he thinks he is sexy, far as I am concerned they look like male hookers.

[DanaR]

I've been told a few times that I dress too young, Oh well!

[noeleena]

Hi,

As a woman i wear some lovely clothes, & i get lovely comments as well some i know & some iv not met .Even when i dress in Edwardian wear. & my Renaissance clothes = garb i get good comments.
Do i dress in a way thats in keeping with my age of 64.. Elegantly nice & clothes that suit me .

The ? would be for me more along the lines of mutton dressed as lamb not nice is it . well the fact is Both Jos & i know a few women who do why because they think because they dont have youth on thier side they need to , no they dont because to day we have a wonderfull selection of lovely clothes to choose from & we can look nice, tho many women dont wont to its jeans & tops whats known as the bag'y look.

...noeleena...

[audreyinalbany]

I see GG's of a certain age who dress far younger than their chronological age: they don't generally look that great either