Starting therapy soon.

[Schatten Lupus]

I have been shopping around for a therapist, and I think I have found one. She does therapy for gender identity, and I am wondering what sort of things should I ask about during a first session, or even before the first? I've also never been to any therapist, so even just therapy will be a new experience that I'm not too sure about what exactly to look for and what sort of questions to ask.

[Jorja]

I am glad to hear you are moving forward and seeking your own answers. Usually, the first session is about getting to know you. She will ask about your background. There will be questions about your childhood, children, marriage, school, work, and depression. Just relax and be yourself. It's like going to talk to Mom or maybe an older sister when you have a problem except you are paying her for her help. Be open and as honest with your answers as you can be. Don't hold back. If it is something that may embarrass you a little, don't worry she has heard it all before.

[kimdl93]

My thought would be to ask her to explain a little about her approach to therapy - nothing technical - but just an overview of the process so that you'll have some idea what to expect. When I was in therapy, my pschologist took the time to explain and it made it easier for me to work effectively with her. That didn't happen until perhaps the third or fourth session...and I guess she felt she needed to focus my attention a bit...I'd spent the first three sessions basically bitching about my Ex as a not so clever way to avoid talking about myself.

[elizabethamy]

Agree with what's been said. One thing I would add is that it's important for you to be straight with the therapist about what you want to talk about. They're not mind-readers, and I've had therapies before where I just didn't come out with what I really needed to work on. Your therapist can only help you go where you need to go if she/he knows at least the general vicinity...

[Jorja]

Here are some questions you may want to ask of your therapist.

• How many TS patients do you have?
• How many women have you recommended for surgery?
• How long have you been working with TSs?
• What is your educational background?
o Remember, one of your SRS letter writers must, according to the Standards of Care, be from a doctorate-level clinical professional: "If the first letter is from a person with a master's degree (M.A.), the second letter should be from a psychiatrist (M.D.) or a clinical psychologist (Ph.D.). If the first letter is from the patient's psychotherapist, the second letter should be from a person who has only played an evaluative role for the patient."
• What books on TS issues most influenced you?
• Have you written any books or articles on the subject?
• What got you interested in working with transsexuals?
• What is your basic philosophy about how to treat this condition?
• What is your opinion of the Harry Benjamin Standards of Care?
• What is your hourly rate?
• What length of session do you usually prefer?

[LeaP]

I asked several of the things Jorja mentioned. I also went looking for recommendations and referrals. The therapist I'm seeing was referred to me by two separate WPATH psychologists, one in my area, one out of the area. She was also recommended to me by a forum member. I also looked at participation in trans events (speaking invitations and the like), as well as inclusion on trans-specific therapist directories. Not all of this is strictly necessary, but I wanted someone who was BOTH well-grounded in trans counseling as well as not having an agenda.

Lea

[Kelsy]

All of the questions above are good basic informatonal questions that everyone should ask. It is also important
to feel comfortable. In a couple of sessions you should be able to tell if you'll be comfortable enough to honestly
share some of your deepest feelings and fears etc. A good therapist needs to be a relatively neutral but supportive guide..
one who lets you discover who you are and where you're going..

Kelsy