Bribery

[Kathy4ever]

My grandson was going to have his 1st birthday party this past weekend. The party was 3 and half hours away. Nobody really wanted to go but I felt an obligation to go. My wife was really trying everything to get me to cancel. The most tempting thing was she would give me a pedicure and paint my toenails. She said i could go out and buy any color I wanted. In the back of my mine I wanted to jump for that opportunity. I had to bite my lip and say she would tell me to take that ..it off the next day. I've learned not to be so negative but she probably would of done this. I fought both urges and still went. Now if she had said I could dress all the way that would of been more tempting. She tried everything but we still went. That 7 hours of driving for 2 hour birthday was terrible. Now it is time for my birthday and I hope she will let me do something femme anyway.

[Karren H]

Think I'd want to go to my grandson's first birthday...

[suzy1]

Think I'd want to go to my grandson's first birthday...

I agree with Karren. It’s your grandson!

[JessicaM1985]

I commend you for going anyway, and am a little appauled that your wife didn't want to be there for her grandson's very first birthday. Of course I'm sure that there are other factors in play, so I'll hold off on casting stones just yet. But I don't like the bribery mindset. It just feels so wrong for people to "grant" you permission to be yourself, and even more so when said permission is given to manipulate you to their ends. Again, I don't,know all the inner workings, so I can only base my opinion on what is posted here. But good grief did she strike out on this one....

[Renee W]

Grandkids grow up fast, next thing you know he'll be graduating HS and you'll wonder why you never saw him a lot when he was young. Take every opportunity you can to see him.

[eluuzion]

In my opinion, you did the right thing. Family is always the right thing. I will be there with bells on...or pumps...or something...anyway...for my kids B-Days and my grandchildren too. I just hope the grand-kids don't exist for awhile...my daughter is only 19 yrs old...tomorrow! :D

Ok then,,,you still get a gold "atta-grandpa-boy" sticker for your fridge. :heehee:

:hugs:
:love:

[Foxglove]

It wouldn't kill me to miss a grandchild's birthday--although perhaps I should say I don't have any grandkids, and I think it'll be a while before I do have any. But I have to say I'm with Jessica on this one. "If we stay home, I'll paint your toenails for you." I'm really not sure what's going on there. It strikes me as an odd offer. If your wife doesn't want to go, it seems to me it would be better to discuss the issue and find out what's going on.

Annabelle

[Loni]

only one time in the whole universe will your grandson have his first birthday. you can dress up pretty most any time you like.
if your wife does not approve of your dressing but then wants to bribe you into NOT going to your grandsons birthday party. i will reserve comment.

[Laura912]

Must agree with Loni on this one.
Laura

[S. Lisa Smith]

You absolutely did the right thing!!!

[jillleanne]

Bribery works for me everytime.

[deangela]

yes 1st birthdays only happen once. its worth it.

[Joann Smith]

I got 5 grandkids and me and the wife done hit all the first birthday hoot-n-nannies ... And I am with Kathy's wife on this one.... they suck ...these little babies cannot hold thier sugar yet ..they get a all sugar buzzed up and make a mess of the cake then mess on themselves and go to sleep...Then the adults get all drunk make a mess of the cake and start fighting over who called who's baby ugly....then we have to pull out all the adult's baby pictures and show everybody just how ugly they were as kids ...everytime its a hot mess ...Who ever it was that came up the idea of having birthday parties for little bitty babies need to be smacked.. I have asked all my grand kids when they got a little older .."do you remember you first birthday party" and everyone of them said "naw ..I was a baby you fruit cake"

But we go any way because we the grands and the stupidity needs to be controlled

Joann

[DonnaT]

My Grandson's third b'day is coming up, and I wouldn't want to miss any of them. Any excuse to be around him is a good one.

And a 3 1/2 hr drive is nothing to me, I like driving. But if I thought it would be too much, I'd surely find a way to spend overnight nearby.

[Leslie Langford]

Uh oh, Joann - sounds as if someone here is well on the way to old fart-hood :eek: :heehee: :tongueout.

Sure, kids and grand-kids can be a pain sometimes, but the good times so outweigh the bad that it really becomes a moot point if one takes the long view...Just one look at their angelic faces when they are finally fast asleep washes away everything negative that might have gone on beforehand.

It is often said that youth wasted on the young, and I generally agree, but when it comes to having kids of their own, that is a job best left to the younger generation. They still have the energy, enthusiasm, and optimism that some of us older folk no longer possess have after having been blown up one time too many as we tried to successfully navigate this minefield called "life". Thank goodness for that, because if they were all as jaded as some of us sometimes become, no one would be having children anymore, and that would spell the end of the human race.

I agree with the others that Kathy did the right thing. Such life events only last a fleeting amount of time, but regrets over missed opportunities last a lifetime.

[Cheryl T]

I wouldn't miss his 1st birthday party for anything.

I do agree that the 7 hour drive for a 2 hour party is a bit much. I would have maybe arranged to go the day before and stay over or stay over that night and either spend the time with the family or ... or ... bring some things and go out on the town with my wife. I hate spending more time going and coming than the time I spend at the destination.

It is family though and there is nothing more important than family.

[Joann Smith]

Uh oh, Joann - sounds as if someone here is well on the way to old fart-hood :eek: :heehee: :tongueout. .

Yeah ....i know and today I am one more year closer...

[~Joanne~]

Yeah ....i know and today I am one more year closer...

Happy Birthday :)

On Topic: I would have made a 3 day weekend out of it and got a hotel room. Then you and the wife could have had some special time together and enjoyed the birthday party :) who knows, maybe you could have had a girl's day too in there :)

[Misty G]

I vote for the b'day party for sure . . . . I have three grand daughters 3, 5, & 4 mo. Haven't missed a party yet of coarse it is only 1.5 hours away

[Patty B.]

good for you family always comes first, I'd have done the same thing.

[noeleena]

Hi,

What was the real reason your S O did not wont to go. that seems strange ( for a woman ), answer that then that will change the whole dynamics of not going.

Back to your S O on that,

...noeleena...

[Shari]

You blew it.
As a veteran of eight first birthday parties, I can tell you that not one of the kids had any idea what was going on and none of them really even knew their grandparents yet.
The party is for the parents, not the child. Even at age two, they're not real sure what's happening.
Add seven hours in the car and yes, you really did mess up a golden opportunity.

[Kathy4ever]

We are a fractured family. My 3 oldest are from my 1st marriage. I think my wife has become a home body. December and January are not fun anymore. With my 3 living that far away we end up having about 5 christmases and now we have 4 birthdays in those two months. It becomes hard trying to do every single birthday. and all those christmases . I get tired and the wallet is pretty slim by the end of this. I agree with her but we have to do for family sometimes things we don't want to do.

[Kathy4ever]

Would of been nice to do but not budget wise at this time. We would of had my mother and two children so I doubt any fem time at all.

[Kathy4ever]

She knows I like fem things but dissaproves and hates it. She probable thought I would take her up on it and then we wouldn't have to go. Or maybe it was a test to see what was more important to me. She was throwing a lot of things out to bribe me as well. I agree family first type of thing. Now that we are almost into febuary now there are two more grandchild birthday plus my youngest birthday and my sister. I guess this is the blessing of having a big family.
It wouldn't kill me to miss a grandchild's birthday--although perhaps I should say I don't have any grandkids, and I think it'll be a while before I do have any. But I have to say I'm with Jessica on this one. "If we stay home, I'll paint your toenails for you." I'm really not sure what's going on there. It strikes me as an odd offer. If your wife doesn't want to go, it seems to me it would be better to discuss the issue and find out what's going on.

Annabelle

[rachel_rachel]

My parents were down for some other things this past week, they arrived at my house on Sunday afternoon for my daughter's 4th birthday, ate lunch and headed off on a 4 1/2 trip to get home befroe dark..

If and when the time comes to attend my grandson's 1st birthday, It's simply a no brainer... family all the way, to suggest fem time is more imprtant is selfish.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Kathy, We only have one grandaughter who is a senior in HS.
I can't think of any event in her life that Grandmom and I wern't
a part of starting the day she was born.

[J'lyn GG]

OMG! My son had his first birthday party this past weekend, as well. (ours is always very subdued and my kid did not have a meltdown, but, of course, we don't drink at kids' birthday parties)

I am assuming your wife is your second wife and not this boy's bio grandma. I won't comment on that. The fact that you were willing to miss your grandson's party (also assuming you rarely see him, b/c he lives so far away) with a bribe of cding, is disturbing.

[kimdl93]

I live 22 driving hours from my grandson and granddaughter. I would make the drive at any opportunity to spend a couple of hours with them.

[josee]

First birthdays are a big deal in my family. My wife flew 1600 miles to go to our grandson's first birthday. I'd have gone with her if we could afford it.