Support group vs. social events

[JessHaust]

I think I skipped a step and want your opinions. I really just gave in to my desires a few months ago. You know the story, born with it an all. So once I finally put the whole thing together and liked he results, I started looking for ways to find other CD/TG's in person.
I found Tri-Es and applied. But by the time the big sister contacted me I had all ready found a CD/TG group on meetup.com. I have gone to several of the meetup events and they are really social events where we all just talk and have fun.
I met with the Tri-Es big sister at one of hese events, and she passed her blessing on me to join. Well there have not been any Tri-Es meetings yet, but I'm really beginning to question if I even need to attend them.
I feel happy, accepted and very well adjusted. I love doing things en femme with the girls in my meetup group. My wife has always known and is very accepting, she even goes to some of the events with me. My kids know, and also tag along. I've told my friends and they are cool with it.
So do you think there is any benifit to attending a support group when I really don't feel the need for support?

[NathalieX66]

My Tri-Ess group (Sigma Nu Rho) is linked in with an all-inclusive group New Jersey Support group. They both do exacly what support groups are meant to do: find yourself, gather resources, and go where you need to go. We have the Transgender Surgery Center in Bala Cynwyd, Pa., and we talk about it all the time.
I met many friends. If i was someone who was completely transsexual; and needed to make the transition, everything I could ever ask for is there.

We often get together at an all-night diner that is frequented by military servicemen from Fort Dix, and race car drivers from a rearby race track. We are treated like celebrities.

[Miranda-E]

So do you think there is any benifit to attending a support group when I really don't feel the need for support?

no benefit at all if you don't feel the need for support.
plus I find the wording of the Tri-ess charter offensive and anti-LGBT.

[NathalieX66]

plus I find the wording of the Tri-ess charter offensive and anti-LGBT.

That's because there is a generational gap. they are my parent's generation. The charter is flawed in my opinion. It's old school mentality. I am not alone in how I feel. I'm trying to change that.

[AllieSF]

I like the social aspects of the fun groups. That being said, I do like the support group located in Sacramento, California, The River City Gems. They have sup-port for all and have fun activities too. Maybe the Tri-Ess support is more intense and serious. I just get bored when it gets too serious. No fun normally results in no Allie.

[Genifer Teal]

I've heard some good and some bad things about Tri-Ess. I have never had any contact with them personally. Now that you have been on some outings and met some friends, you will be able to form your own opinions about Tri-Ess. Maybe those new friends will give you some ideas.

Gen

[Julogden]

Id suggest that you give Tri Ess a try. I started out with the Chicago Tri Ess chapter and met lots of great people and made some wonderful friends. They had plenty of social stuff too, so it's not all just sitting around in a meeting room being supportive.

If you find it's not your cup of tea, then you don't need to stay there, but you ought to check it out, IMO.

Carol

[StaceyJane]

I first meet someone from the Austin Tri-Ess group for my first shopping trip. After that I went to 2 meetings but really they were a long drive away and I could do better without paying dues.

[Diane Smith]

After going through the application and approval process, it certainly can't hurt to attend a few meetings of the second Tri-Ess group and see how you like the people, the events and the tone -- having multiple groups to hang out with increases your chances of finding a place you're comfortable. If you're not happy there, no big deal, just spend more of your time with the people you like better.

- Diane

[DanaR]

From what I've seen in another group (in the Seattle area), new member will join and socialize for a while, then drop out. Many times they find out they don't need a group to go places and just do things on their own. Sometimes it is nice to make some friends, maybe to go out with or to talk to once in a while. Everyone has different needs, so whatever works for you.

I've been away from the group scene for about six years, but have been slowly trying to get back into it. I'm just trying to get out a little more.

[jacky83]

Focusing on the "support" term can be little misleading since the main activities are usually primarily social as anything.

[Tanya C]

Well Jess, if it were me I would probably go anyway just to check it out. I figure what the hell, an outing's an outing.

[Bree-asaurus]

I'm not a crossdresser, but I do attend our local transexual group. More as a way to meet new people and luckily I found support in the new relationships I have made.

Social or support or whatever, might as well try it out. Making new friends that share your struggles is the best support you can find.

[Eryn]

I'd say that it would be a good idea to give it a try. Going to a CD event is a very different experience than going out in public solo and you should give yourself the opportunity to experience both. I happen to like both.

[Dana921]

I encourage you to go, as do others! It is a great way to meet others like folks have already said but it is also a great way to meet and encourage folks to embrace and develop themselves through your shared experiences. For me, everytime I share myself with others who have not been out enjoying being themselves, I feel like we both can grow through talking and sharing of the times out and about! They are encouraged and I solidify my thoughts on the experience!

[zorianacd]

Support groups are great for talking things out or trying to resolve feeling. It sounds like there are no conflicts with your crossdressing as it relates to the people who are important to you. Just go out and have fun. I think we as crossdressers get too caught up in the why of dressing instead of talking about the clothes, makeup tricks and shoes. Just my 2 cents. Dallas seems like a cool place for CDers.

[Josie M]

I've recently hooked up with a local Tri-Ess chapter. I love that group and plan to keep meeting with them. However, I did have some mis-givings when the outreach person explained the charter....which was confirmed by some of the feedback from the membership. It almost seems transphobic.

So, while I like the local group, I don't know if I will officially join Tri-Ess. All that being said though, a support group is a good way to help develop a social network as your fem self and generally "get out" :)

[Debglam]

What do you have to lose? Think of it as just another opportunity to make more friends!


Social or support or whatever, might as well try it out. Making new friends that share your struggles is the best support you can find.

What is the old saying? Good friends make joys double and halve sorrows or something like that!

[Regan]

Jess,

It sounds like you have a ton of support at home and so if you have found a group you really enjoy keep going. If the opportunity arises to go to a meeting it can't hurt.

Regan

[JessHaust]

that share your struggles is the best support you can find.

Yes but my maim struggle is the padded gramet that gives me that oh so nice butt and hips, but your right, it offers little support!

Seriously, thanks for all the suggestions. I did attend a GEAR event and had a good time. But real fun came after though, when some of my friends from the other group and I went out clubbing after!