I don't get why I dress.

[Melissa Jill]

I don't get it! When in drab I feel this compulsion to dress like some yearning to do it, and then I do it and it feels alright at first then after a few minutes its just...nothing. Its just normal, I don't get anything from dressing apart from occasionally a few good pictures. I like the feel I guess, but that goes away pretty quick.
wtf is it?

[NathalieX66]

It is normal.
Society has created the conditions that make it seem not normal.

[sissystephanie]

I think Nathalie answered your question very well. I have been crossdressing for over 60 years, and have never really understood why I do it. As far as I am concerned, I do it just because I like to wear feminine clothing!! There is no other reason for me!

[Melissa Jill]

It is normal.
Society has created the conditions that make it seem not normal.

Yea but I mean, why do I do it if I don't get anything out of it? Its like an addiction or something.

[NathalieX66]

Some guys like the sexy stuff: the heels, the sheer stockings & garter belts, lacy bras, whatever.
In my case, i'm jealous of the fashion options women have, and how they can just wear whatever they want, whenever they want. Guys' clothes are too ho-hum.
So I want to be a girl.....sometimes.
It makes me happy. :)

[Barbra P]

Hi Melissa

You answered your own question in your post, “. . . it feels alright at first then after a few minutes its just...nothing. Its just normal . . .”, and what is wrong with feeling normal? People pay millions every year to Counselors, Therapists, and Psychiatrists just so they can feel normal, and you have the solution at hand. Enjoy feeling normal, a good percentage of the population would love to feel normal.

[goodnhose]

Melissa, i'm new to this site but like you and many others have delt with the issue of dressing my entire life. All i can say is i have felt as you "I don't get why i dress" especially when i was younger. As i have made it to middle age the quesion of why i dress has turned into an acceptance and a love of the feeling dressing brings. Maybe try a new approach the next time the feeling grabs you, i do this all the time, take your computer into the bathroom with you and watch a youtube video on make up application for voluptuous lips, high arched brows, highlighted cheeks etc. Start and pause as the instruction goes along, take your time and after a few practice runs you will master a new look and that always gives a beautiful feeling. What i have found here in a very short time is wonderful support and i in turn support you! Take care.

[Allisa]

Sonds almost like my thread "lost that lovely feeling",maybe just try to wear only one or two items that are comfy and soon you forget that you have them on and the compulsion goes away.This dressing thing can get quite perplexing at times,that's why were here.

As always Lisa.

[tvbeckytv]

best part of it for me was when wearing a dress just felt normal.

[Kate Simmons]

Living on the edge is part of it I guess, at least initially. That kind of sours when you get the bills for all the stuff.:)

[Karren H]

Salmon probably don't get why they swim up stream, spawn and die either.

[stacycoral]

In my case, i'm jealous of the fashion options women have, and how they can just wear whatever they want, whenever they want. Guys' clothes are too ho-hum.
So I want to be a girl.....sometimes.
It makes me happy. :)

I could agree more Nathalie, YOU GO GIRL

[Jenniferathome]

Yea but I mean, why do I do it if I don't get anything out of it? Its like an addiction or something.

You DO get something out of it. That "nothing" you feel is calm and sense of well being, right? Crossdressing is in our genes, that's why we do it.

[Barbara Ella]

When you are not dressed, do you feel "normal?" When you first dress, you have broken a societal taboo, and that produces a rush. After some time, you feel "normal." Man does this sound like a really neat therapy session. How would you rather feel? So, if it feels good, do it. If it makes you feel normal, do it. Sounds like a win win situation to me. Your body/mind is telling you something, listen. I love the normal feeling I achieve.

Babes

[LeaP]

I've been dressed all day today. Most of the day I never even thought about it. Normal is a wonderful thing to achieve.

Of course it didn't help when my wife commented that the jeans were too droopy in the rear because the cut was too high-waisted, but other than THAT ...

Lea

[NathalieX66]

Salmon probably don't get why they swim up stream, spawn and die either.

Karren, as a seafood addict, you're making me hungry.

[KellyJameson]

For me it feels more natural/normal to "pretend" to be woman than it is to "be" a man so any "compulsion?" comes from the desire to create an illusion that mirrors my own natural emotional state. It has nothing to do with thoughts,opinions,beliefs, but purely an expression of my own subconscious feeling state that guides much of my behavior. How I move, what I'm attracted to or not, How I interact with others,ect.. All things that are there no matter how I'm dressed and cannot be undone even when I have tried to force myself to be other than what I am.

For me it feels very "normal" to dress because I see in the mirror what I feel in my being and what I feel on the inside I have only seen expressed by women, not all but some and never in another man even though I know there are others like me. Crossdressing eliminates the dissonance between looking one way but feeling another.

[Brittany CD]

I'm the same way. I don't understand why I dress up either

[Erica Thorn]

not sure what normal means, but I feel more calm and not as irritated when I dress... if that's the normal part then be happy about it!

there is one way to solve the problem tough... run out and buy some new clothes, that should make it feel a bit more special again... it's a good reason to go shopping atleast!:hugs:

[JessicaM1985]

I'be given up on the "why" and I just go with it. I know that when I don't express some degree of femininity, I get moody and depressed. When I'm dressed, I'm a social butterfly and my kinder, gentler nature shows. I prefer the latter, as do most people that have seen me dressed.

[Ava Tryptyk]

Yeah, I think it's best to just go with it, especially if you're alone at home. I'm not sure why I do it (well, I know the reason but I don't know why my brain started becoming fascinated with this kind of thing). When I first put on the pantyhose I feel incredibly sexy and I enjoy running my hands along the smooth(er) contours of my body. After I've fulfilled my sexual needs then I just feel a sense of comfort and warmth.

[Kristy_K]

Melissa, I think who ever had the true answer to that question would make a fortune. For me I figure out I was really CDing when I wore men clothes. That was why I felt so clam and comfortable when wearing women clothes. At least that was the best excuse I could come up with for me.

Kristy

[erickka]

I think you hit it right when you said the word "normal". I feel more on the side of "normal" in a skirt and heels than I do in camos and hiking boots.

[Renee W]

I don't know why either, all I know is that I feel comfortable doing it and it makes me feel good.

[Karren H]

Karren, as a seafood addict, you're making me hungry.

Fine. Birds fly back to Capistrano? Cows lay down before a storm? Lol.

[Montse]

I dress to feel normal, it is exiting to get into my clothes and trying out different new tops skirts shoes (especially shoes), but after that the feeling of just being whole and settling down to everyday tasks and not even noticing what I am wearing. BUT having to take them off is horrendous and I no longer feel normal or content.

[DonnaT]

I don't get it! When in drab I feel this compulsion to dress like some yearning to do it, and then I do it and it feels alright at first then after a few minutes its just...nothing. Its just normal, I don't get anything from dressing apart from occasionally a few good pictures. I like the feel I guess, but that goes away pretty quick.
wtf is it?
You also get relief, relief from the compulsion/yearning to dress.

[Jenniferpl]

If I had the answer to why, then I would be rich.

[Joanne f]

Sometimes the anticipation of something you are about to do can make the experience of having done it seam as the others have said Quite normal.

[Noortje]

If I read your question correctly, Melissa, your confusion stems more from the quick disappearance of the compulsion to dress, than from the compulsion itself. The only experience I have with this personally is when I am wearing an outfit, wig or makeup that I don't like. Seeing myself in the mirror and being disappointed really ruins it. If something similar is happening to you, then you could try different outfits, looks or wigs to see if you can find an image that makes you happy. See if you can create a person that you want to be.

On the other hand, the need for dressing is different for every one of us. Perhaps your need is satisfied by just those few minutes? Or maybe you just dress too often, and this is your mind's way of telling you that you need to be a man as well?

I hope you will soon find the balance you seek!

[countrygirl]

When Amanda dresses I feel that this is who I am supposed to be. This is normal for me. Besides what is normal anyway?