wife just found out

[pamcd3]

Ha;;oween 2005 Wife just found out i crossdress. Nothing said yet. info later

[ChrissyCrossedLegs]

B4 anyone else jumps in here... is this time of year in America ususally a time where CD's TV's get outed .. either intentionally, or otherwise?
Only asking cause how many post like this have we had in the last 2 weeks?

I don't mean this in a nasty horrid way Pam, and I wait to here more details.. fingers ready to type a reply, I just wonder why so many in such a short time, given that if this carries on at this rate, A) half the worlds population of men must CD, and B) I'mm off to the clothes store before everything goes up in price.
Hope all is well Pam.

[KatieZ]

Well good luck with all that Pam.

Gonna provide us with any details as to how she found out?


Hugs

[Petra1]

By "this time of year," people are referring to Halloween, which falls on Oct 3 every year. A day of dressing up in costume, which can unclude dressing as the opposite sex. Either M to F, or vice versa. One of the only days where men can dress as women, and not be looked at so harshly.

[Marlena Dahlstrom]

Good luck Pam! Keep us posted and remember we're here for you.

Sammy Jo, I think it's just a coincidence, but Halloween probably is a good time for many CDs to broach the issue -- although probably after Halloween itself. Mainly because as Petra said, it's an acceptable time to crossdress, so it gives their SOs a chance to see them en femme. That in turn probably makes it both easier to raise the subject and (from the CD's POV) the fact that your SO has just seen you in girl-mode may make it less scary for her.

[Shannon]

Good luck Pam.

SammyJo. I think Halloween presents an "opening" for those that may want to bring it up with their SO, friends, family, etc. I'm not sure I buy in to the theory of "wanting to get caught" but there could very well be some sub-conscious motivations going on as well. It's a difficult subject to bring up....outside of Halloween and being found out, it is one of those topics that you more or less must bring up "out of the blue".

[uknowhoo]

Hi, Pam. Sorry to hear of your outing! We're here for ya until, and after you have a chance to provide the details. I can understand how it may be hard to get 20 min of computer time to tell your tale right now. In the meantime, if you search, there are plenty of other threads posted by gals in a similar situation. It may be helpful to review some of them in the meantime. I'd post some links myself, but alas, I am soo techno-lame :( . Perhaps someone else has the time and inclination to pick up this ball n run with it. Best of luck, sweetie, our hearts are with you. Hugs, Tammi

[ronna]

That's tough, Pam.
What will happen when she sees you dressed? Will you allow that?
I'm guessing she won't look at you in the same way as before.
Maybe you'll be lucky and she will not try to change you.

[Francine]

Me either/too.
My wife found out 5 years after we were married.
but that was 25 years ago and for now, we're still married. She doesn't like "Francine".
My wife has only seen me dressed...once!
Halloween night, '95

good luck.

[Miss Lulu]

I guess I'm lucky,....my spouse has known about my cross-dressing since the beginning. No hiding with her,.....just the rest of the world or almost.

[Rainbow6562005]

Pam, I wish you well in this.

I think the speculation that Halloween's "opening" for showing that one is a CDer makes a great deal of sense. I can only imagine how, after being in a CD "closet," how awful it must be to have been given permission to show oneself, once, at Halloween, then have to go back into the closet. :thumbsdn:

Rainbow

[Deborah]

Good luck Pam. I hope everything turns out well for you. :)

[bredalee25]

I know where your at pam I almost got caught two weeks ago and it was close gg came home early from work luckily i wasn't dressed but my fem stuff was on the bed and in the washer but I managed to get it dried and put away without her knowing she did hear the bags rustling I told her it was a christmas present and had to stash it away quick. Good luck hun keep us posted and more info please my heart goes out to you and as always we're all here for you

[Wenda]

Good luck Pam. I was hoping to do the complete transition this year, but some other obligations have intravened.
SammyJo, Halloween is difficult to explain. I think the US and Canada are the only places where it is really celebrated. Within the bounds of good taste and personal courage, anything goes! It has some similarities to Carnival in Trinidad, or Mardi Gras in Latin America (and New Orleans), except it is highly focused on children and candy treats. It is quite remarkable, though, that a 6-1, 235 lb guy can walk into a womens used-clothing store during the last week of October and get enthusiastic support (If you can describe who you want to dress like), whereas the rest of the year, the service might be a bit chilly.

[Marlena Dahlstrom]

I might add that cross-dressing is accepted during Halloween -- in fact somewhat expected.

I was costume shopping last week and happened to notice at least two dozen women's Halloween costumes clearly marketed toward men, including the ever-popular French maid. One brand lists the height and weight of the models shown on the package (to help buyers gauge the fit) and on one costume, the masculine-faced model was listed as 6-feet tall, 250 pounds. Hmmm.... Another had an obviously male model in a French maid outfit with beard shadow make-up. (Eeeewwww! :eek: )

Incidentally, I've heard estimates that (at least in the States) at least a third of men have experimented with cross-dressing -- although I'm not sure of the source for this data, nor what the definition of "experimentation" was (and whether Halloween and other "respectable" occasions, such as school-related activities, might qualify). But suffice to say, a lot of men are interested in trying it out at least for a night.

(Second digression...) Just saw an article (http://www.mercurynews.com/mld/miamiherald/news/world/13030743.htm?source=rss&channel=miamiherald_world) about how some Europeans are trying to fight off the growing popularity of Halloween. Apparently the Germans are quite into it, spending $170 million on costumes, parties, etc. Not surprising, since the Germans seem to really get into Carnaval as well. Was there a few years ago and every night during the season there was a nightly Carnaval show, which was fun to watch. Nothing like seeing the good burghers trying to get down and boogie. ;) Almost as fun as being in Vegas watching Middle American trying to be ghetto fabulous.

[discordia]

My girlfriend knows I like crossdressing, but she is none too fond of it. My three closest friends know, but it didn't even seem to flinch them.

Though, the first (and only time) my girlfriend ever saw me dressed was one Halloween, and she at least thought it was a great costume.

That Halloween, I went to work dressed like a hooker, short mini-skirt and everything.

Nobody I worked with knew it was me until I spoke to them, and until then, many thought I was a real female.

One of my friends drove me from store to store, and I ended up getting free candy from them for having the most outrageous costume, lol.

It was fun. I wish every night could be Halloween. :cool:

[pamcd3]

My wife found out last saturday night. After coming home from our family halloween party, I didn't change right away because I knew that her & my son would be going to bed. After they went upstairs I went to the basement & changed into another dress & shoes. The one time I headed back down to the basement for another beer I knocked a bucket off the step. The noise woke her up & she came down to see what happened. she asked what the noise was. Told her I knocked the bucket down the steps.Wanted to know what I was doing in the basement, if I was doing laundry. Said no,she asked what I was doing then & I just said I'm wearing my red dress.She came down the steps, saw me, asked if I was a crossdresser, told her yes I was. She didn't say anything at first, then told me to stay in the basement & not to let my son know about it.A few questions were asked Sunday & the it was dropped for the time being. As things stand now I won't dress in front of her or my son, so until things settle down a bit I'll continue my dressing in the basement on sat nites.
Hugs/Kisses to all
Pam

[TGMarla]

Well, it's a start, I guess. It sure could be a lot worse. My situation is not the same, but has similarities. She knows, we don't discuss it, out of sight, out of mind. But now that the subject has grown cold, I am very fearful of bringing it up to her again. This may well happen in your situation. Soon, on some Saturday night when you head to the basement to dress up, she's going to let you know just how she feels about it. I hope it's not an ugly situation. But chin up! Maybe it won't be!

[pamcd3]

Thanks Marla,

all I can do is hope for the best at present time. I usually put my under garments on after my shower. Then later on when everybody's in bed I finish dressing up. For now it might be wise to play it cool.
Hugs/Kisses Pam