Mythical ideology: Part1 "Confidence"

[Inna]

I invite you to a conversation regarding CONFIDENCE and how it helps us be us.

Confidence, however a powerful ethereal quality about a person, making others see such individual in positive, strong self respecting ways, can not change how ones bone structure is read.........or can it?
I am the long time believer that confidence can perhaps make it easier on the individual to handle rejection, or perhaps ease how others feel about such person but I so disagree with the notion that confidence can make one pass or lack of it, confine to rejection land.

I have experienced confidence as well as lack of it, but it always came with respect to my environment, the more I passed the more confidence I grew, then when I didn't pass such would dwindle and I would go back to beginning.

I think a lot of people can relate to that reset feeling of starting yet again, and feeling the loss what we thought was the final step, and then slam, and life proving yet again that it has the upper hand.

All that said, IT IS MY OWN PERSPECTIVE, and I would love to hear yours:

Always loving, sometimes wrong, Inna

[Kate T]

As a "CD" lurking in TSland please I speak with no experience per se of "passing" but I will supply my opinion nonetheless.
Confidence can not change biology or anatomy. So if you are talking about direct static visible clues then no, confidence will do nothing.
Confidence can however change Behaviour. E.g. A confident walk, head held high, chest strong and back straight will generally accentuate feminine characteristics. Confidence will usually encourage mOre expressive gestures and more physical interaction, both of which are generally seen as more feminine.
We use behavioral clues as well as anatomical clues to define gender so in as much as confidence can alter Behaviour then yes I think it can affect whether one "passes".
Now, whether one NEEDS to pass and to whom one needs to pass, there is another question I believe.

[Kelsy]

Confidence is good if it has it's basis in reality. There is, I believe, a false confidence that is gin-ed up!
a false front that will collapse if confronted. I exhibited a confidence in my male role But I knew it was an illusion! It was all part of my protective shell!

K

[Julia_in_Pa]

Confidence is simply a gathered amount of past positive experiences at what your doing being projected in the here and now.
How does one explain extremely masculine women?
These women still act, breath and smell as such thus resulting in their presentation being nothing but feminine.
There is no thought that goes into whether or not these women "pass" or not they are what they are.
Once someone gets to that point of " confidence" in their knowledge of who and what they are there is nothing left to conquer.


Julia

[Sally24]

I definitely know that lack of confidence will get you read. I think you CAN argue whether confidence will make you pass. I firmly beleive that what you think and feel and are is broadcast on your face. I've seen plenty of women with beautiful bone structure but their unpleasant soul shows thru so much that they are ugly. I think the confidence, friendliness and personality you show on your face is key to presenting as female. Additional facial.structures that are typically female are great too. I've just seen too many people without surgury that obviously come across as female to think that the inner girl has no bearing on passing with the general public.

[Stephenie S]

Julia got it right this time. Perhaps our difficulty with this concept is that "confidence" is the wrong word here. I usually call it an absolute inner knowledge of your own femininity. Owning your identity to yourself, so to speak. Please don't drag out all the "football lineman" comments. Of COURSE a massive football physique is difficult to overcome. We all know that.

The comment, "Wow. See that woman over there? She sure looks like a guy", contains two important words. "Woman" and "she". All things being equal, that's what we are searching for, and "confidence" can help you get there.

Stephie