Repression = Depression

[Marleena]

This is probably more for the new members but, just do it! Dress if you need to, it's harmless. There is a direct correlation to repressing the urge and being depressed.

I'm living proof of the theory.:)

[Karren H]

Well.... Like every good theory there's exceptions! Lol. I repress my dressing a lot and very rarely get depressed. And when I do get depressed that one day a year its due to something totally unrelated to what clothes I wear. But what ever works for you... Do it....

[Marleena]

Well.... Like every good theory there's exceptions! Lol. I repress my dressing a lot and very rarely get depressed. And when I do get depressed that one day a year its due to something totally unrelated to what clothes I wear. But what ever works for you... Do it....

Karren you ruined my theory already!..lol.

True story in my case though.:)

[ArleneRaquel]

My solution to depression is to dress enfemme 24/7.

[Marleena]

My solution to depression is to dress enfemme 24/7.

I would love to dress 24/7 Arlene. I have family obligations, and not out to them. *sigh*.

[xcross23x]

definately true for my recently i have decided to embrase my dressing and stop repressing it. i have found a huge change in how i feel before i was always down on myself and had no energy or drive to do anything now that i have started to embrase who i am i have become happier if myself.

[Marleena]

definately true for my recently i have decided to embrase my dressing and stop repressing it. i have found a huge change in how i feel before i was always down on myself and had no energy or drive to do anything now that i have started to embrase who i am i have become happier if myself.

Exactly..Same here, I had a personality change after accepting it.:) It all makes sense now.

[ArleneRaquel]

IMHO accepting your " choice " of lifestyle is a fantastic remedy to depression.

[Vanessa5]

It was the same for me. I tried to stop dressing and it just about pushed me over the edge. Now I try to dress everyday, even for a little bit, and it keeps my anxiety in check without drugs. Kinda funny. Shrink says take pills for it and it stays the same but put me in a dress and heels and it all but dissappears.

[Barbara Ella]

I have to admit that finally realizing and accepting cross dressing improved my behavior quite a bit. On the day or two I cannot or do not dress even a little, i get a bit cranky. Nothing a few hours in bra and heels doesnt cure however.

Babes

[docrobbysherry]

I vote with Karren. I just don't GET depressed or BORED! There's too many fun things I enjoy doing to get bored or depressed! And, I look forward to one or more EVERY DAY! Only one of them is the ACT of dressing!

Let me add that if I feel the compulsion to dress strongly enuff, I'LL JUST DO IT!

[Vickie_CDTV]

I am always depressed, regardless of what I wear. Makes it a bit more bearable but that is about it.

[Dorothy159]

Nothing a few hours in bra and heels doesnt cure however.

Babes
This needs to be written down. Quote of the year.

[Ava Tryptyk]

Hmm, after 4 months from now I'm going to be living with family and won't be able to do any dressing without outing myself...I may just have to out myself if I can't resist dressing until the day when I move into my own place and can freely dress how I want (that day has not yet been defined).

[Jocelyn Quivers]

I will second that motion having gone about 3 weeks with no girl time was a very depressing time for me, which felt like a part of me was missing or more like dying. As for purposely trying to repress it, I learned my lesson with that the hard way a long time ago.

[jaglover]

I can absolutely agree. I strongly believe that my history of financial problems due to poor business decisions and the trouble I've had getting up the energy/commitment to do something about it was made much worse by the amount of repressing I've had to do over the years. It's distracting, it makes you grumpy, distant, forgetful, and prone to eating/drinking/smoking too much. One of the first things I found on the interweb about CDing many years ago said that the vast majority of CDers are normal well-adjusted people who can be at least as good as anyone else as husbands, fathers, providers etc. But CDers who are forced by circumstances to suppress their nature can become depressed, fall out with their families, lose their jobs, become alcoholics etc etc. I guess it's bit like when they used to keep big cats in cages at zoos and they would become listless and sick because they couldn't exhibit their natural behaviour.

[Sheila11]

Well.... Like every good theory there's exceptions! Lol. I repress my dressing a lot and very rarely get depressed. And when I do get depressed that one day a year its due to something totally unrelated to what clothes I wear. But what ever works for you... Do it....

I'm with Karen. "Don't worry be happy."

[Kathi Lake]

I agree with Karren as well. Dressing does not 'cure' my depression. In fact, I find that when I'm depressed that my desire to dress diminishes. Call me odd, but I dress when I'm happy.

:)

Kathi

[Ressie]

I can absolutely agree. I strongly believe that my history of financial problems due to poor business decisions and the trouble I've had getting up the energy/commitment to do something about it was made much worse by the amount of repressing I've had to do over the years. It's distracting, it makes you grumpy, distant, forgetful, and prone to eating/drinking/smoking too much. One of the first things I found on the interweb about CDing many years ago said that the vast majority of CDers are normal well-adjusted people who can be at least as good as anyone else as husbands, fathers, providers etc. But CDers who are forced by circumstances to suppress their nature can become depressed, fall out with their families, lose their jobs, become alcoholics etc etc. I guess it's bit like when they used to keep big cats in cages at zoos and they would become listless and sick because they couldn't exhibit their natural behaviour.

Could you provide a link? Sorry, but this is only hearsay at this point. And how much crossdressing is required to defeat depression? Underdressing, outing one's self or somewhere in between.

[jaglover]

Could you provide a link? Sorry, but this is only hearsay at this point.

No I can't provide a link - as I said it was some years ago when I read this, while I was mining for anything serious on the subject. I'm not trying to sell the idea to you Dee - believe as you choose to believe. I assume the bit you've highlighted in bold is what you what you have a problem with? Not the bit about what happens to people like us that are forced to suppress their behaviour?

[Marleena]

No I can't provide a link - as I said it was some years ago when I read this, while I was mining for anything serious on the subject. I'm not trying to sell the idea to you Dee - believe as you choose to believe. I assume the bit you've highlighted in bold is what you what you have a problem with? Not the bit about what happens to people like us that are forced to suppress their behaviour?

I can vouch for this. Since I accepted my being TG the clouds have disappeared. That's why I created this thread.:) The wife noticed a big difference too.

[Ressie]

No I can't provide a link - as I said it was some years ago when I read this, while I was mining for anything serious on the subject. I'm not trying to sell the idea to you Dee - believe as you choose to believe. I assume the bit you've highlighted in bold is what you what you have a problem with? Not the bit about what happens to people like us that are forced to suppress their behaviour?

I just was hoping to see any scientific studies that might have been done that's all. CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) might be something to look into for those with depression. I guess I highlighted the wrong part! How does dressing relieve depression for crossdressers? Are there hormonal changes that occur, is it thoughts that go along with dressing or something else? I believe what one is thinking causes depression more than anything else, but there are other factors too.

[Ally 2112]

I was meaning to ask this question and glad it has been asked .I know that for me repressing and hiding made it take so much longer for me to acceppt myself and what i did .I would get irratible and depressed ,then after i dressed i would feel very quilty .After i seperated from my wife and my girls were grown i swore i was never going to repress or hide to another SO
This decision has made my life a lot simpler and i acceppt myself way more than i ever have !.

[Sophie_C]

This is probably more for the new members but, just do it! Dress if you need to, it's harmless. There is a direct correlation to repressing the urge and being depressed.

I'm living proof of the theory.:)

Some days I completely agree with you, some days I completely disagree. The strange thing is that, while being completely closeted, I am more and more rapidly not caring, so I know sooner or later that's gonna change. What a strange day that will be!

[elizabethamy]

Anne Vitale's book "The Gendered Self" talks about this brilliantly. Lifelong repression -- even denial to the point where you don't even know yourself that you might be transgendered -- can lead to depression, anxiety, poor and significantly declining work performance in middle age, and a whole host of other things. THis is my story, the ending to which is at this point unknowable to me. But what she's describing are the symptoms of repression of anything major -- trauma, abuse, etc. I highly recommend this book. You can read big chunks of it at thegenderedself.com.

[jaglover]

I just was hoping to see any scientific studies that might have been done that's all. CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) might be something to look into for those with depression. I guess I highlighted the wrong part! How does dressing relieve depression for crossdressers? Are there hormonal changes that occur, is it thoughts that go along with dressing or something else? I believe what one is thinking causes depression more than anything else, but there are other factors too.

I'm no expert on any of this but I would consider it axiomatic that anyone, forced to suppress for a long time something that's key to their personality, will suffer accordingly. And I suspect it's worse when the suppression seems unreasonable. If someone who lives on a flat plain has an in-born need to climb mountains then it's easier to suppress that need - because there are no mountains - than it would be for someone who lived right at the bottom of a mountain.

Every day I have to make the decision not to cross-dress. Some of us are making that decision because we're afraid (of how the world will react or whatever). But a lot of us make that decision mainly because we don't want to hurt someone we care about. We make ourselves feel bad to protect someone else from feeling bad. It's a good call, but it's an expensive one.

[JamieTG]

I agree with Kathi. I have to be in a happy mood to have the desire to dress and enjoy it. If I'm depressed I go ahead and dress just out habit instead of looking for a lift. I always wondered why my desires are so much stronger in the summer. Its because my mood is so much better with what more sunlight and outdoor activities. As to the original question, anytime you release things that you've kept inside and caused inner turmoil, you are going to feel greatly relieved.

[Melissa_59]

I think it might have something to do with "can" repress, versus "must" repress. If you feel like you are being forced into repressing a feeling, whatever the circumstance, that would lead to depression. It's the concept of not having a choice in the matter, which leads to you feeling helpless. Helpless people often feel depressed because they're in a hole they can't get out of. Someone is going to say "Well there's always a choice" and while that is true, you have a choice of jumping off a roof or not as well! One of those choices is suboptimal, and one that I will never counsel someone to take.

I've been in that hole you can't get out of, I couldn't get out of it for years. And I drank a lot more than is good for someone. I'm much happier these days because I feel I have more control over my life. And I only drink socially now as well.

[Marleena]

I should add here it will also matter where on the TG scale you fall. For instance if you are just a casual CDer repressing dressing might not affect you as much as if you are TG or TS.

[水仙雪[Suisen Yuki]]

Today is the first time for me wearing entirely feminine clothes... It feels really good!

Pantyhose ftw!

(Has anyone else ever wondered why girly clothes are more comfortable?)