Met someone new and now what to do....

[CorrieCanda]

Just went out for dinner with a lady on Valentines Day and had a great dinner and conversation... My counsellor told me on or after the third date, tell your date about your secrets, like for me, I have genital herpes, a recovered alcoholic, and I am into underdressing. Its hard approaching these subjects yet my last two dates since Spring 2011 were ok with the first two. Never told them about third one. I did not even tell my counsellor. Told my phyciatrist and he said underdressing "does not hurt anyone". Those dates did not fail due to dishonesty... so who can relate to me here on how and when to tell your new special someone your secrets?

[DonnaT]

Depends on the secret. If it was a STD, tell before sex. If it was about CDing, tell when you feel it turning into a possible long term relationship.

[Laura912]

And if you are on a date and having a drink comes up, invite her to have one but explain that you can't and then tell her why if that seems like a good time.
Laura

[Ally 2112]

If your going to have relations or sex ok !.Then tell her right away about the std's and the alcoholism .If you feel this could turn into a long term thing then my opin is kinda feel out the situation then tell her about the dressing but do not wait to long

[Postopadmirer]

Corrie,
Some good advice here. Not sure I would bury the cross dressing that deep, better she know eventually, but I think the point is well made that the STD and alcoholism are going to have a big impact on any relationship and should be out in the open almost from the start. We all have issues, some have labels others are harder to label but still part of being alive.
Welcome
Wendy

[CorrieCanda]

Thanks for your help everyone... tough enough just waiting for her to call me when she wants go on a date next lol.