How/why did you stop purging?

[Brittany CD]

I've gone through it too multiple times. Purging is something many of us do and I was wondering why you did purge in the past and why or how you stopped. For me, I wanted to give up crossdressing recently because I have felt conflicted about dressing as a girl so I thought I had to give it up in order for these conflicting feelings to disappear. I really stuck to it for a few days but it was torturous for me because I have a lot of female friends and when I'd see them in their boots and their cute sweaters as well as all the dresses and heeled shoes I see in the mall, I couldn't take it. I didn't throw anything away because I guess I subconsciously knew it wouldn't last long and had to become Katie again and I did so. I guess my femme side has a lot of control over me as I have gone back to being Katie again. I still feel conflicted and will probably try to purge again in the future, but I love being her so much it probably won't last long

[Gillian Gigs]

I stopped when I finally realized that I would come back to CDing, which happened several times. It was getting expensive replacing everything. To reach the place of self acceptance was also an important step also. I am what I am, no sense fighting it, it only makes you miserable fighting a losing battle. Life is a journey, so we might as well embrace it and enjoy the ride.

[Eva_nine]

i only purged once when i was very young. i was 15-16 and only had 2 outfits with no make up or shoes and a swim suit so it wasnt much. i did it because i thought my mom might find the stuff.

now when i get that feeling that i dont want to dress i typically try to force myself to either work on my car or motorcycle so that my hands wont be girly or i grow a beard which i HATE. Much better than wasting money but it helps me slow down and remember that being girly is just a hobby and not something i can commit to full time. i have had a beard since the begining of february kinda as a punishment for going out twice in one week en femme back in january. i hate the beard but its much better than wasting a ton of $$ and having to start all over like i know i would.

[Marcia Blue]

I stopped purging after coming out to my Wife. She asked after joining this site, "Have you ever purged?". I replied, "Yes". She said, "Do not do that again, you are only wasting money". Since then, I have not purged.

Wise women, my Wife!

[Billie Jean]

I lost a lot of pretty things I loved and it was getting too expensive. Billie Jean

[Anna Lorree]

I stopped purging after coming out to my Wife. She asked after joining this site, "Have you ever purged?". I replied, "Yes". She said, "Do not do that again, you are only wasting money". Since then, I have not purged.

Wise women, my Wife!

I quit after telling my wife as well. After I told her about purging, she told me I was stupid for getting rid of so much stuff.

Anna

[Lisa-N]

Like most I have purged 2 or 3 times. After the first time my wife foundout. again after a separation from my wife (not due to dressing) Now that I have accepted that Tangi is an integral part of who I am and what makes me unique I won't do it again. Anyhow as others have said I lke my clothes and its way to expensive to keep replacing these things. My wife may not fully approve but she doesn't object. Out of sight out of mind.

[sometimes_miss]

At some point, I realized that my crossdressing wasn't ever going to go away, and that it would be very, very difficult to replace some of the clothes because of my size. So I just started hiding my stuff during the periods when I wasn't feeling the need to dress up.

[Angelofsomekind]

I never purged. I always thought that if I wanted to stop dressing I needed to have access to clothes. If I don't dress because they aren't here I don't know if I really stopped or just don't have them. If I have clothes and still don't want to dress, then I'd know I'm really done with it.
Fortunately I never got to the point where I really wanted to stop.

[kimdl93]

For me, the biggest deterrent to purging has been the full realization that I'd regret it later. There have been times when I packed things away and put them in the attic, only to be retrieved a short time later.

[Renee W]

Put me in the group of those who have purged multiple times in the past, mostly because I thought I could stop or out of fear of discovery. Now that I am out to the wife, purging will be a thing of the past, never to be done again.

[Susan_Xdress]

Like the others, I have purged many times. Sometimes to stop myself dressing, and/or fear of being discovered.

I stopped purging when I was in my own place and finally accepted what and who I am. What I am is a male to female cross-dresser, and who I am is both David and Susan.

Are clothes an enabler?, well of course they are. What I did learn to accept was the simple fact that Susan did not magically leave me when her clothes vanished, she would always be there regardless.
David wouldn’t vanish if he had no jeans to wear, anymore than Susan ceases to exist when there are no dresses in the closet.

And oh how I still miss some of the first clothes Susan had.

[Melissa Jill]

Ive only purged once. I didn't have much anyway, but I thought I had grown out of it. I never really considered myself a crossdresser before, so I didn't know that it wasn't just a phase. Since knowing Im a crossdresser I have never purged, nor will I ever. I have 0 shame about this, but Im a youngster and grew up with the internet, so thats to be expected.

[Nicola]

I too stopped purging when I realised I am who I am and, as others have said, replacing things you have thrown out is just a waste of money.
I still selectively get rid of items in order to stop my collection growing too large.
The comming of the internet made me realise I wasn't the only person in the whole world who crossdressed and that made me feel a whole lot better about doing it.

Nicola

[carhill2mn]

A word of advice, if I may: do not throw anything away. I can virtually guarantee that you will resume crossdressing again in not too long a time. I hope that soon you will be able to reconcile yourself to the fact that you are a CD and always will be. T
Accepting this will enable you to enjoy life more with much less stress.

Good luck.

[Nikki A.]

I purged when I was younger and tried to quit. After I met wife #2 wanted to get rid of the last vestiges of wife 1 which I kept for myself. She knew about my dressing but it was no where near the level it is now.

[Victoria Vermilliana]

I purged a few times before I came out to my family. After my parents found out and I confessed and was allowed to dress all the time, I stopped purging. Never needed to after that!

[Chantellexxx]

5 times now, & all I have ATM is a pair of panties......

[Alicia Waves]

Thrown everything away many times over many years. I miss some really cute outfits in both girl and boy styles. The last time was the worst....sigh..... on the upside it just means more time shopping!

[Bluesman]

I stopped purging, after several times, once I realized that the urge to crossdress was never going to go away, although it might lie dormant for many months or even years. And also once I accepted the fact that THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH IT. I count myself fortunate, at least economically, that during the periods where I was subject to purging, I didn't have a lot of clothes, so no big economic loss (although I still miss some of the items I threw out). Now, I would never purge. If I got to the point where I thought I was "over it" (Ha!) I would just put all my girly stuff in a box or suitcase and hide it away somewhere. My advice: never, ever purge (unless it's just stuff you don't like, doesn't fit anymore, worn out, etc.). Keep the good stuff for a few years at least. You'll come back to it, and be glad you still have it.

[Delila]

I stopped purging when I threw all of my men's underwear away. When I get the urge which I am sure many of us do my logic kicks in and reminds me that one I spent a lot of money on these clothes and two I would have zero underwear if I threw my panties away. It also helps to come to terms with what you are it is not going away if you really feel the urge it will come back. We have all or at least those who have purged have felt the strain and given in the key is to remind yourself however hard it may be that you are doing what is natural to you. Religion and society have no control over what you do in your personal time.

[k lynn]

I have purge 2 times both didnt last long And coming to under stand I will probably never stop dressing I enjoy it to much And the cost with a good bra costing close to $50.00 money is not a fun thing to throw away

[Raychel]

My last purge was many years ago, when I married my wife, Now I have come to grips with who I am and my wife is also aware of the true me, There will be no purging in the future for me. Just learn to accept who you are, It makes life so much easier.

[Cheryl T]

It's kind of like hitting yourself in the head...it hurts....
When you do it again...it still hurts...
When you do it yet again...damn, it still hurts....

When you do it enough times and it hurts each time you learn not to do it again.

[Sissy Michelle]

I tried to stop "dressing" once, many years ago thinking it would help stop me feeling so feminine and girly etc..and therefore help me "fit in" more as a male. I threw away or gave away all my heels, dresses, wigs etc...to other "girls" that i knew. As most of us agree........its expensive stupidity in the long run ! ;)

[johanna.kitten]

Today, purging, means to me - every single time I found myself wearing any men's clothes it goes straight in the bin afterwards.

I did not always used to be like this, I cleaned out my femme stuff a few times over the years. Can clearly recall one of
my best mates did my SO (GG) whilst I was away on a trip. When I got home I put my +200 pair of women's underwear
on our bed - never saw my SO again and then threw out all my femme stuff and moved, I regret this big time (throwing
out my things I mean).

/Johanna

[Joann Smith]

Purging.......Should quit calling it that and call it what it actually is ..."A Big Friggin waste of money"

[Veronica Lacey]

Purged twice before I was 20, each time less than a small garbage bag full. Like many others I simply thought it was wrong and needed to make the "clean cut." Shortly after the last purge I accepted that I found joy and comfort in dressing so why attach myself by discarding what helps keep me happy? Now in my 40's with a considerable sized wardrobe I would never dream of discarding any of it.

[STACY B]

Threw all my man clothes away ,, So I purged them so didnt have anything to wear but girl stuff ,, That will slow ya down !!!!

[ArleneRaquel]

I just decided one day that enough is enough and that I desired to be as close to a 24/7 girl as possible. This was back in 2004.

[TxKimberly]

Simple - I stopped purging when I stopped feeling ashamed of who and what I am. After that, there is no need for purging!

[brassieres]

Simple - I stopped purging when I stopped feeling ashamed of who and what I am. After that, there is no need for purging!

I am starting to accept who I am more myself too. At least not suppressing it anyway.

[Meg East]

I purged once. My wife reminds me that the purging was during a moment of self loathing and a waste of money. We know who has the brains in our family.......

[Karren H]

I never really stopped purging..... But now I do it to support my shopping addiction and not because I'm disgusted with myself...

[Aloha Jayne]

I purged all my stuff to a climate controlled self storage locker. It's difficult to get to, but it's still there if I need it.

[angpai30]

I stopped when I finally realized that I would come back to CDing, which happened several times. It was getting expensive replacing everything. To reach the place of self acceptance was also an important step also. I am what I am, no sense fighting it, it only makes you miserable fighting a losing battle. Life is a journey, so we might as well embrace it and enjoy the ride.

This is the truth!!! I stopped fighting it and purging on New Years Day!! Toughest New Years Resolution EVER, but I have been able to keep it! Yay!

Kristen~~

[Noemi]

I just purged my last response by hitting the reply to thread button instead of the post button. How many of you do this from time to time? Or am I the only Idiot.
What I had written was that I recently purged because I had a steady GF for a bit. I have purged a few times, maybe once a year for a while. It is difficult for me to deal with my gender issues.
I really want to have a BF too and dress up all the time, but I won't allow myself.
Filomena will not go away. When I purge I am hoping that she will disappear...she does not. And now that I am in my forties, she becomes more every year. I wonder what will happen..
I do know that dressing up makes me feel good and feelings are usually correct.
I hope to never purge again.
Great reading this post for me thank you all!!!

[Bex]

Last time I purged, I gave $600+ of clothes to my college girlfriend. She didn't know they were mine... She and I weren't too much of a different size back then and she looked gorgeous in all of them.
Shortly after I found out she threw everything out. This was... years ago.
So... Never again!

[cdkateinboston]

Are clothes an enabler?, well of course they are. What I did learn to accept was the simple fact that Susan did not magically leave me when her clothes vanished, she would always be there regardless.

Agreed Susan. I found I had two reasons to stop purging as I have done it 2-3 times since I began collecting my own items at 14. I typically did it out of guilt and the feeling that the feeling of wanting to appear as Kaite was "wrong". As I grew older and came across sites such as this, that feeling obviously went away because its not wrong at all. So that helped stop the process. Also the cost, I now have over $2000 worth of items between clothing, makeup and accessories and throwing them away, like Susan said, does not make Kaite disappear. Also, what really helped me stop was like what Susan also said, I was fortunate to come to terms with the role Kaite played in my overall life and be comfortable with those terms. So now I know they are both part of me, and I know I will one day find an SO who accepts that, so why purge if I'm just gonna have to buy it all over again?! lol

[sonna]

a wast of money......

[Kristyn Hill]

Before my wife knew what she does know, I would purge high heels. The most awesome thing is she is a size 10 which I can wear most of them. I wear them around the house some when no one is home. My wife and I have bought a couple pairs of shoes for me online which we still have hidden deep in the closet. They are taken on overnight trips for "fun time". I am lucky she knows I am into her shoes and wear them when she is not.

[Tina B.]

Twice for me, once when my first wife walked out. My life went through a change moving back with family, purging seemed the simplest way to deal with it. The second time was in a time of self loathing, but the next day I woke up to find I was the same person, and my closet was empty. back then it wasn't that big of a thing, I didn't lose that much, I didn't have that much. Now I can't even throw away to make room for new. I just put in storage for a year of two, then rotate it all, then it all seems new again. Of course I have to loss 10 to 15 pounds to wear one of them, the other is when I put it back on. At this point in my life I have spent way to much on clothes to be wasting it on purges.
I do need to pack up something to make room for my birthday present when it gets here, and I need more hangers.
Tina B.