Caught My Wife Dressing Up

[Jenny Beth]

I had an earlier day that I thought today and came home to find my wife all dolled up in the bedroom in a black and white print dress, black stockings and high heels. She NEVER dresses up so I asked what's going on. Turns out her sister gave her tickets to an upcoming opera and she was trying different outfits on. I told her I caught her the way crossdressers get caught and we both burst out laughing. It was one of those "ya had to be there" moments to see the humour in it and it still has me smiling. :heehee:

[Alisa]

That's a cute story Jenny Beth...

[Marleena]

So you busted her? Did you ask her if she was gay?

J/k. Cute story, we also have lots of laughs over it. It's nice when your SO is involved with it.:)

[Lorileah]

So did you two choose an outfit?

[Karren H]

Lol. I'd assume my wife was having an affair if I found here dressing up!

[JohnH]

I had an earlier day that I thought today and came home to find my wife all dolled up in the bedroom in a black and white print dress, black stockings and high heels. She NEVER dresses up so I asked what's going on. I told her I caught her the way crossdressers get caught and we both burst out laughing. It was one of those "ya had to be there" moments to see the humour in it and it still has me smiling. :heehee:

If I ever caught my wife doing that I would be extremely surprised. I would wonder what got into her. I am the one who wears the dresses and skirts openly in front of my wife and around the neighborhood; my wife never wears those items.

Johanna

[Jenny Beth]

Lol. I'd assume my wife was having an affair if I found here dressing up!


Either that or she figured if ya can't beat 'em join 'em.

[Niya W]

Lol. I'd assume my wife was having an affair if I found here dressing up!
Karren's wife dressing up and her wearing jeans .

[Karren H]

Either that or she figured if ya can't beat 'em join 'em.

That would be if you can't beat them to a pulp....


Karren's wife dressing up and her wearing jeans .

She already does that.... Why do you think i hate jeans so much!!!

[Niya W]

I meant the wife dressing up and Karren wearing the jeans . Like the seventh sign or the 4 horse men

[Krista Doll]

May I suggest matching gowns for both of you. You must be dressed formal for the opera.

[RADER]

That would be if you can't beat them to a pulp....



She already does that.... Why do you think i hate jeans so much!!!

Hay Karren; Why don't you just join her, than you can both go out together
dressed in Jeans.
Rader

[Eryn]

Now, if you had caught her dressed in drab, say in a baggy gray sweatshirt, 501 blue jeans, and running shoes, and checking herself out in the mirror then you would have something to worry about... :)

[Tara D. Rose]

Now, if you had caught her dressed in drab, say in a baggy gray sweatshirt, 501 blue jeans, and running shoes, and checking herself out in the mirror then you would have something to worry about... :)

Or also with a fake mustashe and a hat and a three peice suit. I'd have to start the 20 question routine, but I'd tell her that I'm 100% behind her and will go with her to support groups or take her for after dark rides.

[Alice B]

Great story and great moment. One that tie the two of you closer.

[Pinky188]

Very funny! I like to hear that couples enjoy each other, no matter what!!

[KaTanya]

Jenny, you should support your wife's dressing and give her the stregth and courage to be herself. Who knows, with enough love, care, and support, the two of you just may grow closer. Together. *sniff*

[Jenny Beth]

May I suggest matching gowns for both of you. You must be dressed formal for the opera.

There's a limit to how far I'll go, matching gowns would be fun but opera is not my thing.

[Debutante]

Very nice! (Sounds like she has a nice outfit too!)

[Barbara Ella]

It is nice to see two people having a fun moment, and knowing exactly what they are laughing about. Priceless.

Babes

[Joanna Maguire]

My wife and I have been to the Sydney Opera House several times all dolled up in evening dresses. She seldom dressed up She is the one who usually wears the pants so to speak in our house.

[giuseppina]

There's a limit to how far I'll go, matching gowns would be fun but opera is not my thing.


I Like a Mozart opera, but the Ring Cycle (Wagner) in 5 days is a bit much.

[Jenny Beth]

My wife and I have been to the Sydney Opera House several times all dolled up in evening dresses. .

Now that's cool. I might not be into opera but if my wife's tickets included a trip down under to the Sydney Opera House she wouldn't have to twist my arm.

[Babeba]

OMG does this mean she is now going to want full facial surgery or is it just a stocking fetish she has? I mean, you never know where it might end, you hear so many stories. What you need to do is SET LIMITS. Make some ground rules and make sure she isn't wearing stockings behind your back or buying things on Ebay without checking in with you first. Once you reach ten posts you can join the GM forum. Or rather, you can unless they decide that you can't.


Scarlet, you're usually more polite than this and I'm disappointed to read you talking this way.

Some GGs have a hard time dealing with learning their husband feels feminine and has an identity which is hidden from them, by talking together with their spouse and agreeing on boundaries which will help her focus on dealing with one chunk of the issues her husband dressing brings up in her life at a time. Trust is often a bigger issue than simply dressing up and NO SHIT if someone says they will refrain from doing something (like wear stockings) then does it anyway but hides it, that is a big problem in terms of being able to trust them. If you can't stop wearing stockings, then be honest about it and don't promise to quit only to do it behind someone's back. That is the exact opposite of establishing trust!

As for the buying on eBay thing, some couples have a very tight budget. VERY tight. One gal I work with was telling us at work today about how she was grumpy with her hubby last night because he had an urge to shop so he wanted to buy things yesterday at the grocery store on his way home from work. She wouldn't let him go to the store because they didn't need anything. So some couples can afford a couple hundred dollars a month to be put towards a hobby for one of them, and others simply cannot. I do not think it is fair for any of us to judge each other for the way they handle money.

We GGs are part of the EXACT SAME community as the rest of you, except you know what? We don't have to be. We don't have lifelong urges to crossdress that cause us so much grief. We belong here because we love someone who is special to us, and we want to know why they are the way they are and how we can deal with it or even embrace it when we are ready. We are just as aware as the CDs after an equal amount of time on the boards here that gender variance is a lot more than either transitioning transsexual or fetish dressers and that each person is unique. Just because in the absolute worst case scenario we can walk away (not that any of us on here really want to) and just because we have usually absolutely no idea what this is all about at first, and have a steep learning curve, is no reason to be so mockingly contemptuous in your post.


Back on topic...

Jenny Beth, did you show you're okay with her dressing femme sometimes by maybe buying her a necklace or making her a cute card to find next time she goes in her 'nice things' drawer? :heehee:

[chrissy hunt]

That quite funny, nice to be able to giggle about things like this xx

[Silentpartner GG SO]

Babeba I think Scarlet's post was very much a "tongue in cheek" thing - we Brits do have a weird sense of humour sometimes that isnt always understood by our friends across the Pond. I dont think she meant any harm - did you Scarlet??? ;)

[Babeba]

Silent,

I know it was meant to be over-the-top funny... But the reactions of new GGs are too raw to joke about. It's like racist jokes - like if the wife had had a really culturally black moment and someone started spouting off about fried chicken and welfare. Or if the wife were East Indian and was caught doing something from that culture she doesnt normally do, like dress up in a sari, and so someone made a joke about smelling curry. I don't think saying negative stereotypes are ever funny enough to make up for the fact they are reinforcing them.

I grew up on Monty Python, Are You Being Served and the Carry ons, my Grandparents are from Yorkshire and I lived in England for almost a year and a half. I know quite a bit about British humour and I appreciate it... Most of the time!

[Jenny Beth]

Back on topic...

Jenny Beth, did you show you're okay with her dressing femme sometimes by maybe buying her a necklace or making her a cute card to find next time she goes in her 'nice things' drawer? :heehee:

Firstly I knew Scarlet Rose's post was a tongue in cheek remark but I also knew it could be taken the wrong way by some who are having difficulties with their relationships. I almost didn't even post my topic in the first place because I also know there are some here who have been caught and it has cost them dearly and wouldn't see the humour in it. I certainly understand your position and for what it's worth wherever you are on an understanding/acceptance or non acceptance level I am glad there are women here who are trying to work though this with their partners. But back to your question.

She knows I like seeing her dressed up just as I like seeing her in jeans and plaid shirts when she's gardening or hiking, I don't try to influence what she wears any more than she tries to influence what I wear but that mostly comes from over twenty five years in this lifestyle. I like your idea of the cute card in her "nice things" drawer though, we always exchange girly birthday cards so I'll have to give this some serious thought.

[Di]

How cool is that!!! Your post made me giggle.....love when that happens.:hugs:

[Babeba]

Believe me, Jenny, I definitely see the humour in it! I love it, great reactions.

Scarlet, the absurdity of the situation is super clear. And if you had joked about one stereotypical GG reaction, it still would have been funny. It was more the fact that you posted a laundry list of 'gg reactions'... All negative ones... That felt a bit venomous. The 'turning on its head' humour only works if the things or viewpoints referenced in the joke are recognizable, and the very act of making them into a joke normalizes and reinforces them. as in, it's funny because somewhere you're thinking, 'that's totally what happens! Haha, how do you like them apples?'. It's the sort of mentality that makes new-to-this GGs think, 'I don't want to be That Girl. I won't rock the boat.' then she doesn't properly communicate her needs or talk about how dressing affects the relationship... And one more happy couple is less likely to make it through this whole thing together.

I tried to turn the type of humour around by joking about a different type of GG reaction - trying to show support materially, which many of us do as an early reaction - and Jenny took it very seriously. That's totally well and good, I love it when couples do cute little things to show they love and care, but I was trying to make the same category of joke as Scarlet. (and that Jenny did so well in the first place, with no mean spirit about it!)

You know why it fell flat on its face? I'm guessing because the stereotype of GGs is to be a party-pooping naysayer who will ruin it all for you rather than there being a possibility of her being accepting or willing to be open minded and explore. That is the sad part.

[velvet]

stockings every time but shaved legs always,
i bought a handbag from a goodsecond hand shop, it was new still had the label on it and unmarked ,got it for $5 andwhen i got home i showed my wife,,, she looked at it and then said in my ear,,, you realise Velvet its not real leather,,,, she didnt say why did u buy that or the colour is not right,, we both still laugh about it years later...

[Krististeph]

That's so cute! I like it when my wife has some fun dressing up, usually she views it as a bit of a chore. If she only knew how much better she looks dressed cute than I can ever manage....

[Vanessa Storrs]

I thought the only people who dress like that these days are crossdressers.