jennifercd
04-01-2012, 03:11 AM
Ill start by saying that it has been years since i last dressed and or went out in public. Dressing for me seems to be a cyclical thing that comes and goes with long spans in between (four or five years.)
So needless to say i have been getting the "itch" to dress again for some reason and this weekend my wife was out for a couple of days and i took the opportunity to have a little fun for myself. This was probably the 4th time i have been out in public dressed starting with driving around when i was about sixteen, but today was a major step for me as it was the first time i was in close quarters and interacting with people. I had a great time and i just wanted to share my story with everyone else as i absolutely love reading everyone else's going out stories.
I know you girls like details so here goes. I started my wonderful evening with changing into panties and cami style shapper bra. I put on my new pair of boot cut girl jeans size 8 i think and slipped on some one and a half inch large strapped wedge heals. Put on a pink cami and the pink striped top that ties in the back. I stepped back and checked myself in the large bedroom mirror to make sure i had no bulges and to admire how great this top works with these jeans. I let my pony tail down as i already have shoulder length curly hair (drives my wife crazy always saying women would kill to have natural curls like yours.) headed to the bathroom to wash my face, shave, and do makeup but (ouch) got a fairly large nick as i am more of an electric razor man. so while i was waiting for the nick to heal a little i put a thin coat of light shimmering pink polish on my fairly long nails and a clear top coat. The nick was still fresh so i went ahead and wet my hair with the shower head, dried off and put some curling cream in and lightly blow dried my hair to set the curls in. parted my hair down the middle and pulled the top center portions back and topped it with a head band almost the same color as my hair. (I wear it like this often when in male mode without the head band but occasionally will go out on quick errands with it) Face regime, makeup, and one inch hoop earrings followed and i was ready to hit the night at around 8:30. I grabbed one of my wife's extra purses and stuffed my wallet, phone, keys, and lip gloss in took one last look in the large mirror and thought "I think i pulled off a good look to blend in with the late 20's crowd" and then i said to myself "damn i look really good!" I headed out the garage to the the car.
Uh oh, the neighbors across the way were in there kitchen and i could clearly see them so i hurried to the car and turned it on closed the garage and backed out of the driveway. So the first thought was were do I go and what should i do as this was partially a spur of the moment thing. I was full en fem and thought why not lets ditch the normal atms and gas station fill ups and go for broke. So inspired by countless stories i read on here i headed to a fairly large shopping center near by and parked outside the target. I couldn't bring myself to go in even going as far as opening the door and stepping out. But as soon as i got to the end of my car i chickened out and turned around and got back in the car. I drove two stores over and parked about ten cars from the entrance to Kohls. I waited in the car for about fifteen minutes just listening to the radio trying to get the nerve to go in. Several men and women passed by my car as i had parked on the main walkway through the parking lot and several passers by i know saw me in the car but not one of them even took a second look or payed any attention to me both males and females, young and old. From the car i was 100% passing. This thought is what gave me the courage to grab my purse, open the door, step out, check myself in the window of the suv next to me, and walk to the door. Head up, shoulders back with smaller steps then normal i could feel my hips starting to sway a little as i walked. I remembered to keep a slight smile on my face and kept repeating in my head "act natural, smile, and own it." I stopped at the driveway in front of the store to let a couple of cars pass be for crossing myself. As i stepped off the curb i noticed a gentleman maybe about 40 or so walking toward the door from the side. My heart started racing as i knew I was too far and committed to turn back and we were going to meet at the door at about the same time. I told myself to calm down, and just keep putting one foot in front of the other. keeping my head up and walking, we made eye contact. I flashed a little smile and he turned, hastened his stride and quickly opened the door and waited a few seconds for me to catch up and enter before him as he held the door for me. My hart jumped because this was the first time i had a man open a door for me and it made me feel great, accepted, and totally in control of myself. I gave him a huge smile as i passed and entered the store and likewise recieved a slight nod and a "here you go miss." This again made me feel great. I walked about thirty or forty feet into he store and i noticed the man was still about seven or eight feet behind me. This started to make me a little nervous and i turned and headed into the racks of women's tops to escape. I glanced over my shoulder as i turned and caught his eyes fully checking me out all the way down and then back up. Again we made eye contact, I gave him another more accepting smile (as to say "I know you just undressed me" its ok with me) and he continued walking past to another department. Finely i was mostly alone and was able to browse the clothes. I walked in and out of racks picking up a few tops, a couple pairs of pants and a dress. All the while passing several other men, women, couples, and kids. I remembered to put on extra smile when catching the eyes of parents with kids. I headed to the dressing room tried on all the clothes i picked up but didn't like how they either fit or they just didn't work together as i had thought. Besides where would i keep them all. I headed out of the dressing rooms and again uh oh here comes a SA. I was completely scared and might have looked like a deer in headlight because i have never practiced speaking in a feminine voice. It might have been this look on my face that made the SA stop and ask "Are you finding everything ok ma'am?" I thought oh shit i need to respond. I quickly snapped myself back to reality, got a smile out and said in what i thought was a convincing voice "I'm ok." The SA just smiled back and said "If you need anything just let me know" and continued walking to where ever she was going. That was a close one and it got my mind racing back to all the encounters thus far, starting with the door, passing others in the store, shopping off the same racks as other customers, ect. and my mind kept saying did anymore read you, did anyone read you. I proceeded to get a little paranoid and found a quite area of the store to browse and collect myself and reclaim a foothold on my surroundings. After a few minutes i had convinced myself that nothing was wrong. I was just another girl shopping for cloths and no one was the wiser. I stuck around for another 20 minutes or so and reaffirmed my belief that i was being accepted as just another woman and no one was at all mean, rude, gave funny looks, or even said anything to me. I uneventfully headed toward the door with no purchases in hand and walked out just before the stores closing time. Once outside i felt this feeling of triumph, i had done it! I felt my body language change a little more. My head was up, breasts out, elbows in, shoulders back, hips swaying just enough, doing my best to present as a confident in her self woman who knew she looked sexy. I got in my car as i pulled my phone out of my purse to check what time it was. I figured i was feeling to good to go home now so what to do. I checked the store hours of the target two stores down and figured lets do round two!
This time i was able to get the very first spot about three rows from the entrance. I turned the car off, grabbed my purse and fumbled for my lip gloss. Looking in the mirror i gave my lips a little refresh, re-fluffed the curls on the side and back of my hair checked to make sure my beard shadow was not showing through (this is my only troublesome spot from the neck up when passing) and repacked the stuff in my purse. I turned to get out of the car when i noticed a male employee about eighteen or twenty sitting on a bench across the driveway on his break having a smoke and he was watching me. My only thought was thank god i didn't try and adjust my beasts. Then it happened. All my fears rushed back in an instant and i felt powerless and super vulnerable. i tried to think back on what happened in Khols but it didn't help. I felt like that kid was judging me and was going to stare, point, and laugh at me as soon as i got out of the car. But for all i knew he could have been just sitting there checking me out as i primped myself in the car. This didn't help and made me feel embarrassed for some reason. I waited in the car for another fifteen minutes to be sure his break was well over and was not just inside the store but back to his post in the stock room or where ever. Once he was gone i felt better and was mustering up the courage to go in when, DAMN IT the target security guard decided to hang out outside the store with the guy who was collecting carts from the parking lot. I waited this out of another five or six minutes and told myself to just do it because the store was going to close and you were not going to get this chance again for a while probably. Again i grabbed my purse opened the door and started walking toward the entrance. I grabbed the first cart i came across, pushed the child seat back and set my purse in its place. For some reason this made me feel very feminine. I walked into the store, past the customer service counter where two girls were just chatting. I glanced over and they didn't even give me a notice. So far so good i was blending. I passed by a younger couple with a kid and saw the man who was being talked at by his wife give a quick eye glance at me. I smiled a little and he resumed listening to his wife. I think she saw him give a quick look because she had to see for herself what grabbed his attention away. I thought to myself "of course he took a peek at the tall curly haired woman with perfectly fitting jeans. This outfit makes my legs look like they don't stop" I would have checked me out too if there was a full length mirror near by. I continued along with my self inflated ego boost toward the shoe department. I tried on about twelve pairs of shoe including these six inch pink heals that i have always wanted to try on. Those were fun because it was really hard to walk to the mirror to see how they looked with my outfit then back to my cart. I was loving myself with all these shoes when it hit me. I was comfortable and was not even thinking about how i looked or what others thought of me or am i passing well enough. This made me feel angry because i had broken that moment and i liked how it felt when i was in it. I was headed toward the lingerie section when a SA gave me a slight sideways look as i headed toward the bras. Damn i think she read me. I was immediately brought down from my pink high and started running though my head what gave me away. The best i could figure was i lost that womanly smile and walk because it was getting late, i was nervous and i was getting a little over confident with myself. I looked around a bit more and heard the announcement that the store would be closing soon so i started back toward the door. I was in the middle of the store now and it was quite a long walk back to the entrance so it gave me time to think about how i was presenting myself and to think about how much being read brought me down. I just told myself again a couple of times as i walked i'm just a girl out shopping. As i got near the door i noticed the security guard was hanging out near the checkout/door area. I had to go right past him to get out. I put on my big girl smile and walk and continued on. As i passed we exchanged a slight smile and he said "Have a nice night ma'am." As i walked back to the car I felt so much better. That simple ma'am or miss just make me feel like i am doing something right.
I was ready to head home but at the same time i wasn't so i headed to a nearby gas station. quickly topped off my car and drove home. once inside i stripped down did a quick wash of my makeup, stepped into a hot bubble bath and shut my eyes to relive the night in my mind.
Thanks for hanging in there with me and this lengthy post but i just needed to tell people about my night out. It was amazingly fun a exciting. This was a first time out besides going to an atm, or gas station. A huge step for me and a night of many firsts. I think i might have re-awaken the pink monster inside of me. hopefully i get a chance to do it again soon.
So needless to say i have been getting the "itch" to dress again for some reason and this weekend my wife was out for a couple of days and i took the opportunity to have a little fun for myself. This was probably the 4th time i have been out in public dressed starting with driving around when i was about sixteen, but today was a major step for me as it was the first time i was in close quarters and interacting with people. I had a great time and i just wanted to share my story with everyone else as i absolutely love reading everyone else's going out stories.
I know you girls like details so here goes. I started my wonderful evening with changing into panties and cami style shapper bra. I put on my new pair of boot cut girl jeans size 8 i think and slipped on some one and a half inch large strapped wedge heals. Put on a pink cami and the pink striped top that ties in the back. I stepped back and checked myself in the large bedroom mirror to make sure i had no bulges and to admire how great this top works with these jeans. I let my pony tail down as i already have shoulder length curly hair (drives my wife crazy always saying women would kill to have natural curls like yours.) headed to the bathroom to wash my face, shave, and do makeup but (ouch) got a fairly large nick as i am more of an electric razor man. so while i was waiting for the nick to heal a little i put a thin coat of light shimmering pink polish on my fairly long nails and a clear top coat. The nick was still fresh so i went ahead and wet my hair with the shower head, dried off and put some curling cream in and lightly blow dried my hair to set the curls in. parted my hair down the middle and pulled the top center portions back and topped it with a head band almost the same color as my hair. (I wear it like this often when in male mode without the head band but occasionally will go out on quick errands with it) Face regime, makeup, and one inch hoop earrings followed and i was ready to hit the night at around 8:30. I grabbed one of my wife's extra purses and stuffed my wallet, phone, keys, and lip gloss in took one last look in the large mirror and thought "I think i pulled off a good look to blend in with the late 20's crowd" and then i said to myself "damn i look really good!" I headed out the garage to the the car.
Uh oh, the neighbors across the way were in there kitchen and i could clearly see them so i hurried to the car and turned it on closed the garage and backed out of the driveway. So the first thought was were do I go and what should i do as this was partially a spur of the moment thing. I was full en fem and thought why not lets ditch the normal atms and gas station fill ups and go for broke. So inspired by countless stories i read on here i headed to a fairly large shopping center near by and parked outside the target. I couldn't bring myself to go in even going as far as opening the door and stepping out. But as soon as i got to the end of my car i chickened out and turned around and got back in the car. I drove two stores over and parked about ten cars from the entrance to Kohls. I waited in the car for about fifteen minutes just listening to the radio trying to get the nerve to go in. Several men and women passed by my car as i had parked on the main walkway through the parking lot and several passers by i know saw me in the car but not one of them even took a second look or payed any attention to me both males and females, young and old. From the car i was 100% passing. This thought is what gave me the courage to grab my purse, open the door, step out, check myself in the window of the suv next to me, and walk to the door. Head up, shoulders back with smaller steps then normal i could feel my hips starting to sway a little as i walked. I remembered to keep a slight smile on my face and kept repeating in my head "act natural, smile, and own it." I stopped at the driveway in front of the store to let a couple of cars pass be for crossing myself. As i stepped off the curb i noticed a gentleman maybe about 40 or so walking toward the door from the side. My heart started racing as i knew I was too far and committed to turn back and we were going to meet at the door at about the same time. I told myself to calm down, and just keep putting one foot in front of the other. keeping my head up and walking, we made eye contact. I flashed a little smile and he turned, hastened his stride and quickly opened the door and waited a few seconds for me to catch up and enter before him as he held the door for me. My hart jumped because this was the first time i had a man open a door for me and it made me feel great, accepted, and totally in control of myself. I gave him a huge smile as i passed and entered the store and likewise recieved a slight nod and a "here you go miss." This again made me feel great. I walked about thirty or forty feet into he store and i noticed the man was still about seven or eight feet behind me. This started to make me a little nervous and i turned and headed into the racks of women's tops to escape. I glanced over my shoulder as i turned and caught his eyes fully checking me out all the way down and then back up. Again we made eye contact, I gave him another more accepting smile (as to say "I know you just undressed me" its ok with me) and he continued walking past to another department. Finely i was mostly alone and was able to browse the clothes. I walked in and out of racks picking up a few tops, a couple pairs of pants and a dress. All the while passing several other men, women, couples, and kids. I remembered to put on extra smile when catching the eyes of parents with kids. I headed to the dressing room tried on all the clothes i picked up but didn't like how they either fit or they just didn't work together as i had thought. Besides where would i keep them all. I headed out of the dressing rooms and again uh oh here comes a SA. I was completely scared and might have looked like a deer in headlight because i have never practiced speaking in a feminine voice. It might have been this look on my face that made the SA stop and ask "Are you finding everything ok ma'am?" I thought oh shit i need to respond. I quickly snapped myself back to reality, got a smile out and said in what i thought was a convincing voice "I'm ok." The SA just smiled back and said "If you need anything just let me know" and continued walking to where ever she was going. That was a close one and it got my mind racing back to all the encounters thus far, starting with the door, passing others in the store, shopping off the same racks as other customers, ect. and my mind kept saying did anymore read you, did anyone read you. I proceeded to get a little paranoid and found a quite area of the store to browse and collect myself and reclaim a foothold on my surroundings. After a few minutes i had convinced myself that nothing was wrong. I was just another girl shopping for cloths and no one was the wiser. I stuck around for another 20 minutes or so and reaffirmed my belief that i was being accepted as just another woman and no one was at all mean, rude, gave funny looks, or even said anything to me. I uneventfully headed toward the door with no purchases in hand and walked out just before the stores closing time. Once outside i felt this feeling of triumph, i had done it! I felt my body language change a little more. My head was up, breasts out, elbows in, shoulders back, hips swaying just enough, doing my best to present as a confident in her self woman who knew she looked sexy. I got in my car as i pulled my phone out of my purse to check what time it was. I figured i was feeling to good to go home now so what to do. I checked the store hours of the target two stores down and figured lets do round two!
This time i was able to get the very first spot about three rows from the entrance. I turned the car off, grabbed my purse and fumbled for my lip gloss. Looking in the mirror i gave my lips a little refresh, re-fluffed the curls on the side and back of my hair checked to make sure my beard shadow was not showing through (this is my only troublesome spot from the neck up when passing) and repacked the stuff in my purse. I turned to get out of the car when i noticed a male employee about eighteen or twenty sitting on a bench across the driveway on his break having a smoke and he was watching me. My only thought was thank god i didn't try and adjust my beasts. Then it happened. All my fears rushed back in an instant and i felt powerless and super vulnerable. i tried to think back on what happened in Khols but it didn't help. I felt like that kid was judging me and was going to stare, point, and laugh at me as soon as i got out of the car. But for all i knew he could have been just sitting there checking me out as i primped myself in the car. This didn't help and made me feel embarrassed for some reason. I waited in the car for another fifteen minutes to be sure his break was well over and was not just inside the store but back to his post in the stock room or where ever. Once he was gone i felt better and was mustering up the courage to go in when, DAMN IT the target security guard decided to hang out outside the store with the guy who was collecting carts from the parking lot. I waited this out of another five or six minutes and told myself to just do it because the store was going to close and you were not going to get this chance again for a while probably. Again i grabbed my purse opened the door and started walking toward the entrance. I grabbed the first cart i came across, pushed the child seat back and set my purse in its place. For some reason this made me feel very feminine. I walked into the store, past the customer service counter where two girls were just chatting. I glanced over and they didn't even give me a notice. So far so good i was blending. I passed by a younger couple with a kid and saw the man who was being talked at by his wife give a quick eye glance at me. I smiled a little and he resumed listening to his wife. I think she saw him give a quick look because she had to see for herself what grabbed his attention away. I thought to myself "of course he took a peek at the tall curly haired woman with perfectly fitting jeans. This outfit makes my legs look like they don't stop" I would have checked me out too if there was a full length mirror near by. I continued along with my self inflated ego boost toward the shoe department. I tried on about twelve pairs of shoe including these six inch pink heals that i have always wanted to try on. Those were fun because it was really hard to walk to the mirror to see how they looked with my outfit then back to my cart. I was loving myself with all these shoes when it hit me. I was comfortable and was not even thinking about how i looked or what others thought of me or am i passing well enough. This made me feel angry because i had broken that moment and i liked how it felt when i was in it. I was headed toward the lingerie section when a SA gave me a slight sideways look as i headed toward the bras. Damn i think she read me. I was immediately brought down from my pink high and started running though my head what gave me away. The best i could figure was i lost that womanly smile and walk because it was getting late, i was nervous and i was getting a little over confident with myself. I looked around a bit more and heard the announcement that the store would be closing soon so i started back toward the door. I was in the middle of the store now and it was quite a long walk back to the entrance so it gave me time to think about how i was presenting myself and to think about how much being read brought me down. I just told myself again a couple of times as i walked i'm just a girl out shopping. As i got near the door i noticed the security guard was hanging out near the checkout/door area. I had to go right past him to get out. I put on my big girl smile and walk and continued on. As i passed we exchanged a slight smile and he said "Have a nice night ma'am." As i walked back to the car I felt so much better. That simple ma'am or miss just make me feel like i am doing something right.
I was ready to head home but at the same time i wasn't so i headed to a nearby gas station. quickly topped off my car and drove home. once inside i stripped down did a quick wash of my makeup, stepped into a hot bubble bath and shut my eyes to relive the night in my mind.
Thanks for hanging in there with me and this lengthy post but i just needed to tell people about my night out. It was amazingly fun a exciting. This was a first time out besides going to an atm, or gas station. A huge step for me and a night of many firsts. I think i might have re-awaken the pink monster inside of me. hopefully i get a chance to do it again soon.