am I the only one with this obssesion?

[thicknatasha]

most of the time im a straight male, but at random times i get the urge to dress up as ****ty as possible and have sex with black men. and its only that, black men. but i dont understand why. when i have a girlfriend it feels great, but then out of no where i get random urges.

[diannecourtney]

I'd say you don't have any imagination as to what goes on here normally. We are not into anywhere near what you are thinking - probably should take it somewhere else!!!

[Marleena]

OK....stand back....I'll deal with this. :)

Random sexual fantasy outside your normal behaviour is normal. That's why they are fantasies. Dressing as a tart and being serviced by big black men is either a rather exaggerated submissive fantasy, or you're having a laugh. However, even then, I doubt you are alone.

I would suggest though, that for your own benefit you maybe read a few of the posts here and get a feel for the tone of the place so you don't accidentally offend without meaning to.

Good answer right there!

The only thing I can add is since it's your first post you started out with a BANG!

P.S. any reason for having thick before your name?:)

[thicknatasha]

sorry if i seemed blunt but its just how i feel. im definetly not having a laugh.

[Marleena]

sorry if i seemed blunt but its just how i feel. im definetly not having a laugh.

Well many women have that same fantasy I've heard.:)

Maybe when you dress as a chick this thought turns you on. Up to you decide to follow through or not..

[Nicole Erin]

Not my fantasy.

Maybe the reason you get this is - during the 90's, it was a cliche fantasy in porn that the husband would go away and here comes the black stallion to take care of the woman. Maybe you grew up with that fantasy.

I think a lot of our sexual fantasies and tastes have to do with things we saw when growing up.

[Lorileah]

more likely a double forbidden pleasure. Two things that in your world (or maybe even three if you break it down more) that you believe are not as things are supposed to be. Just be careful and safe no matter what you do

[Emma Leigh]

I am not going to quote all that Silk, but I do agree with what you say.

ps this forum is a fun place, you just have to know where to look lol

[whowhatwhen]

I think the stereotype is that African Americans are dominant, in-charge, alpha type men so I can see submissive men and women fantasizing about them.
You could argue till the cows come home about what it means but it's fine as long as it floats your boat, your boat consents, and your SO either doesn't exist or is okay with it.

There have been a few sex related threads here, I think they're fine as long as you keep them at least a little clean and don't head into TMI territory.
Like, you can say what floats your boat, but not what you put in it's tailpipe.

[Marleena]

I wasn't sure if we had a troll at first to be honest. I mean that's some first post!!

She sounds sincere though.

[kimdl93]

My question would be, have you acted upon these urges, or is this simply a fantasy?

[NicoleScott]

There have been plenty of posts about fantasizing being with a man without suggesting it be taken elsewhere. Add that the man is a well-hung black man and it becomes too unsavory for the forum? It should be OK to state what your fetish is, but as others have said, we don't need more information.
I'm curious. Does it excite you to dress up as you described without fantasizing about the partner, or being with the partner without dressing up, or are both necessary?

[Eryn]

Unless some posts went missing I have no idea why you posted what you did Silk.

Neither can I. Silk, it seems that you're trying to create conflict where none exists.


I wasn't sure if we had a troll at first to be honest. I mean that's some first post!!

She sounds sincere though.

That's true. Jumping into the deep end is definitely suspicious, but sometimes folks have "heavy" questions that they just can't wait to discuss. Her next few posts will tell us more about the situation!

[Kathi Lake]

Silk,

Yeah, I'm a hater. Everybody knows it. Psh. :)

You want explicit sexual fantasies? Great. Go for it! Just not here. You can get that crap on countless other sites. I would much rather this be a site that is for the support and education of crossdressers/transgenders and their families and friends. Some wives of crossdressers come here for information about the bomb their spouse sometimes just dropped on them. Many spouses already think badly enough of us without seeing posts containing every imaginable fetish or sexual proclivity.

The moderators try to make sure that this site does not 'devolve' into one of 'those' sites. Again, you want it? It's out there. Please keep it that way.

Kathi

[whowhatwhen]

I don't know how explicit the OP was (although from all this now I'm curious) but we can't seriously hide the fact that for some there is a sexual component to their crossdressing.
There are plenty of non explicit threads here that would make a confused spouse positively terrified but for different reasons, IMO it's all about keeping it reasonably clean and not explicit.

Gay/Bi/Confused people drop by too and I think it's fair to keep an open mind and give honest opinions if the question isn't too explicit.
I'm no mod so I'm not sure how many first posts are TMI, but I can see confused people being worried about their sexuality especially if crossdressing is involved.

Damn you post button, stop tempting meeeeeee!

Edit:
^^^^^^^^^
She's 25 years old, that's prime horny years so I can see this not being a troll post but perhaps one that missed the forum rules in eagerness of finding an answer.

[Kaz]

Troll or not, it was a valid post imo. We all have fantasies and just because someone's fantasy might offend others and therefore should not be posted will close down a lot of the value of the site... people will lose confidence in what they are able to post - I have been there... stopped posting and then realsied I can't, as this is a family to me.

The ramifications of this post are ripples that will spill over. If it gets remotely off policy the Mods will close it. I have had had threads closed for far less...

Some of us fantasise about being taken by anyone... black, white.... even red, green or yellow! We just don't talk about it much in public fora (not forums - fora).

[Organza]

Thank you!!!

This forum is a positive place in general, but the biggest problem is judgmentalism. "You should be ashamed..." "You're wrong to..." "Why don't you have the courage to..." I am really, really surprised to read those words here, when we should be all about support.

What you posted was a feeling, Dianna. How can that possibly be wrong? I just don't understand the put-downs. I'm disappointed.
Lisa

[Laurie A]

Most of us have joined this forum with posts like "My name is .... and I have doubts about" or " I am so happy to have found this forum" or so on.

But this OP's first post is about dressing ****ty and and having sex? This sure looks like some type of troll-like behavior. If the OP wanted to express their issues with sexual identity, cross dressing and bisexual desires, then I think that OK within this forum. There is a GM specific subsection where this discussion may be appropriate. But this strikes me as a little like watching a movie in a theater, yelling fire, and then expecting everyone in the theater to contribute their critique of the movie. Most everybody heads for the exits...

So my advice for you, Thicknatasha, is to take some time getting to know what this forum is and isn't, introduce yourself in the new members section, and then perhaps find a way to express your queries regarding obsessions. I think you will find that there is a wide diversity in the population of members here and probably some who can identify with you.

[muzzy]

Hi there,no,you aren't the only one who thinks about black men like that...I do and wonder what it would be like but doubt I'll ever follow it through,my gf wouldn't appreciate it....but it's nice to fantasize all the same and noone can take that away from you....ever xoxo

[thicknatasha]

i shoulda known that it was raunchy material! sorry.

but ill try to respond to what ppl said but its hard!

I have acted out my fantasies many times and sometimes it felt great. i never cheated, it was single when i did it. the thoughts came a lot more when i was single. but it only comes now when me and my gf are in a bad spot.

[urmila11]

most of the time im a straight male, but at random times i get the urge to dress up as ****ty as possible and have sex with black men. and its only that, black men. but i dont understand why. when i have a girlfriend it feels great, but then out of no where i get random urges.
definitely not thicknatasha, ur not the only one. each one of us who cd have our own fantasies, but we might not want to become a reality, but they remain as the most exciting fantasy.
I have my own fantasies and while they are highly exciting, i dont think I will ever want it happen

[Kate T]

i shoulda known that it was raunchy material! sorry.

but ill try to respond to what ppl said but its hard!

I have acted out my fantasies many times and sometimes it felt great. i never cheated, it was single when i did it. the thoughts came a lot more when i was single. but it only comes now when me and my gf are in a bad spot.

Nup, none of the mentioned fantasies.

You need to decide whether acting on these fantasies is good for your own self esteem and health and good for any relationship you may be in now or in the future (given the increased risk of STD's associated with sexually promiscuous behaviour).

[~Joanne~]

I try to keep a very open mind, What is right for others may not be right for me but I do tend to try to not judge others for their choices in life after all it is Their life to live. Is this topic wrong/bad/???, No because it has it's place here whether others agree or not and this fact has been proven time after time since I have been here.

Do I have common thoughts/behavior as the OP? absolutely NOT. This is one of those threads that I read and usually do not respond because it does not pertain to me in the very least.

With all of this said, I agree with most of the girls that have responded that it could/can still be a troll looking to stir things up as it was her/their first post. Usually when you join a community you ease into it, get a feel for the people and content being discussed and ask such a question a bit down the road. With all the admirers, stalkers, and other assorted sickos out there looking to get their rocks off, I fully understand this persons post being questionable at this point and time and the true intent of it being in doubt fantasy or not.

To the original OP, My answer is NO. I am a heterosexual closeted CD and the thought has never entered my mind. I enjoy being both sides of myself. when it comes to the sexual side I will always find a GG.

[kimdl93]

i shoulda known that it was raunchy material! sorry.

but ill try to respond to what ppl said but its hard!

I have acted out my fantasies many times and sometimes it felt great. i never cheated, it was single when i did it. the thoughts came a lot more when i was single. but it only comes now when me and my gf are in a bad spot.

Well, given that you've acted on this urge, then I think you need to do a couple of things. First, clarify what/who you are to yourself and your gf. Its commendable that you haven't followed through on while involved with your gf. Probably better keep it that way, casual sex with I presume strangers, remains a highly risky undertaking from a health perspective. It would be incredibly irresponsible and unfair to her if you cheated on her, and put her at risk.

[docrobbysherry]

Commenting on Thick's experiences, whether real or imagined, is WAY out of my path of expertise!

However, since the topic of "fantasies" has come up, I've had some experience with THAT! I can say with some conviction, once u actual live out a fantasy, u will NEVER THINK OF THAT FANTASY THE SAME WAY AGAIN! For better or worse!

So, think carefully about what u really want and of the many twists and turns that mite happen before u act out one of your fantasies!

[thicknatasha]

so how about an update? im no longer with my girlfriend she broke up with me and i alredy ordered an outfit and make up and have a guy waiting to have me over his house. i hope im making the right choice but this is wut i end up doing.

[Momarie]

most of the time im a straight male, but at random times i get the urge to dress up as ****ty as possible and have sex with black men. and its only that, black men. but i dont understand why. when i have a girlfriend it feels great, but then out of no where i get random urges.

Sorry,
But I think the whole ****ty thing is misogynistic and having sex with black men (as you describe it) is racist.
Also, you might want to totally re-think your describing yourself as a "most of the time a straight male".

[WyrmQueen]

Sorry,
But I think the whole ****ty thing is misogynistic and having sex with black men (as you describe it) is racist.
Also, you might want to totally re-think your describing yourself as a "most of the time a straight male".

I do agree with you. If you're turned on by black guys, you're definitely not straight. Men are the exact opposite of femininity.

[BRANDYJ]

so how about an update? im no longer with my girlfriend she broke up with me and i alredy ordered an outfit and make up and have a guy waiting to have me over his house. i hope im making the right choice but this is wut i end up doing.

Is it any wonder why she left you?


Sorry,
But I think the whole ****ty thing is misogynistic and having sex with black men (as you describe it) is racist.
Also, you might want to totally re-think your describing yourself as a "most of the time a straight male".

Agreed Momarie. There is no such thing as "mostly straight" As for this fantasy... whatever flosts your boat. But I find it disgusting and in my opinion, in very poor taste to post it as a way of a first post. No doubt the OP thinks this is a porn site...it ain't.

[reb.femme]

You want explicit sexual fantasies? Great. Go for it! Just not here. You can get that crap on countless other sites. I would much rather this be a site that is for the support and education of crossdressers/transgenders and their families and friends. Some wives of crossdressers come here for information about the bomb their spouse sometimes just dropped on them. Many spouses already think badly enough of us without seeing posts containing every imaginable fetish or sexual proclivity.

Kathi,

Bang on the money. I joined this site because it had an educational and light hearted feel to it.
The internet is full of this crap, so I wish these trolls would go elsewhere.

If this kind of garbage is to be entertained, I'm out.

Rebecca x

[mykhelee]

ZING POW and call the national guard. Yes, as a first post it was on the edge of what we normally expect to see..:eek:..ok, a bit past it and make a left turn but...if it was an honest query then you need a shot of self esteem. If you spend the primacy of your youth chasing the next sexual high then you are not allowing yourself to grow as an actual individual.:sb: I think perhaps in my outhouse opinion you are bisexual with strong leanings towards men. You get a girlfriend and suppress it, so to punish and reward yourself (classic love/hate), you get involved in meaningless sexual encounters.

There is nothing wrong with wanting to have sex with men while you are dressed, but trolling craig's list and the internet is not going to find you anyone but a sexual partner. If you want to find anything worthwhile in your life stop hiding behind this promiscuous behavior, make some well thought out decisions and find someone to develop a relationship with, then if it builds to something more it will be so much better. :2c:

BE FAITHFUL-no matter whether you choose to play outside or swing for the home team be faithful to the person you are with.
Good luck out there and I hope at least you are playing safe!!:devil::evilbegon
Peace,
Khelli

[Vickie_CDTV]

As mentioned in a previous thread along these same lines, you better actually know that man personally, or you may not be around to post on here (or anywhere else) again!

As for that "thug" type (race doesn't matter), I have known a number of GGs who find that type of man attractive and have been involved with one. Not surprisingly, the GG ends up being treated like total garbage and it never ends well. Don't mistake dominance for exploitation, that kind of man does not love a woman, they only live to use and exploit others. If you wouldn't want someone living next door to you, you don't want that person in your bedroom, I guarantee it.

[BRANDYJ]

Silk,

Yeah, I'm a hater. Everybody knows it. Psh. :)

You want explicit sexual fantasies? Great. Go for it! Just not here. You can get that crap on countless other sites. I would much rather this be a site that is for the support and education of crossdressers/transgenders and their families and friends. Some wives of crossdressers come here for information about the bomb their spouse sometimes just dropped on them. Many spouses already think badly enough of us without seeing posts containing every imaginable fetish or sexual proclivity.

The moderators try to make sure that this site does not 'devolve' into one of 'those' sites. Again, you want it? It's out there. Please keep it that way.

Kathi

I missed Kathi's post since this thread bothers me in so many ways. But I agree wholeheartedly too.


Kathi,

Bang on the money. I joined this site because it had an educational and light hearted feel to it.
The internet is full of this crap, so I wish these trolls would go elsewhere.

If this kind of garbage is to be entertained, I'm out.

Rebecca x

I had a 7 year member PM me about how she is disgusted with some recent threads. She said, " I've been around here for 7 years and have just slightly over 300 posts. Theres a reason for that. Most of the threads I read here just make me shake my head, and they seem to be getting worse by the week. I had to agree.

[WyrmQueen]

We all have our types but sleeping with a black guy because of the stereotype that they're hung, aggressive, and dangerous is just so racist...

[NathalieX66]

The concept that men of other races have well-endowed genitalia seems odd.....does that apply to their female counterparts who have big hoo-ha's?

Race means nothing to me.
This morning , I saw a robin, a blue jay, and a cardinal on my maple tree ...they look like birds to me.

Once in a while I pick up my entertainment newspaper. In the back section, it has blonde escorts, russian escorts, asian escorts, ******* escorts. Not my thing.
I'm a dude that dresses like a lady from time to time. That's all

[Julia_in_Pa]

Your anything but straight. :laughing:

[zoe m]

these sexual stereotypes about men of this or that race ARE racist... they objectify people and they're double-edged swords: stereotyping black men as dominant or as "thugs" makes it easier for society to be afraid of them and to lock them up or shoot them... it's all connected. as somebody said we all have our types but please think a little about what you're doing... race and sexuality are both complicated things and these stereotypes just simplify them and do a lot of harm...

[whowhatwhen]

I think you're all confusing the OP with another poster who said that almost a month ago.
The standard faire applies, be safe and all that and remember you can say no.

OP Finding black guys attractive: Not racist
Poster who said they were uneducated/ect...: Racist

[Piora]

Wait a second, here.

I think this is getting blown rather WAY out of proportion.


Sorry,
But I think the whole ****ty thing is misogynistic and having sex with black men (as you describe it) is racist.

Why is is racist? Lots of genetic women have that same fantasy, and it's anything but racist for them. Because this is a CD having it....that makes it racist? Sorry, I don't see how.


Also, you might want to totally re-think your describing yourself as a "most of the time a straight male".
Agreed. Definitely, the OP is NOT straight. If you are male, and you have fantasies about having sex with men, then you are, at the very least, bisexual. Someone who's straight wouldn't have those kinds of fantasies.

[April_Ligeia]

Actually, since you have acted on this fantasy, you might as well just say you are bisexual. I don 't happen to share that tendency, but i don't understand the outrage of some of the responses. Do your thing and have fun.

[msginaadoll]

I for one am more shocked at the responses than the original poster. I hope this thread is closed ASAP. For people to use such vulgar language and be so rude is to me a much worse offense than the original post. We are a community who is varied but I hope decency and common courtesy is still the utmost importance.

[Babeba]

Nup, none of the mentioned fantasies.

You need to decide whether acting on these fantasies is good for your own self esteem and health and good for any relationship you may be in now or in the future (given the increased risk of STD's associated with sexually promiscuous behaviour).

Specifically, please use barrier protection and if possible, see if your prospective partner has a recent STI test. (that's not foolproof, but it's better than not having one... Having many partners safely is much, much Safer than fewer partners without barrier protection and precautions.

[WyrmQueen]

OP Finding black guys attractive: Not racist
Poster who said they were uneducated/ect...: Racist

It's not racist to find black guys attractive but it is racist to find them attractive because you think all of them are hung, aggressive thugs that just wants to rape you.

[Beverley Sims]

It is more than likely a healthy fantasy of yours.
We all have fantasies and as we do not act on them we hurt no one.
I have been caught out so many times wearing playboy bunny outfits, getting into trouble and having to be the maid to dominant women and going in beauty contests.
Yes! it's all in my dreams.:)

[Meg East]

I for one am more shocked at the responses than the original poster. I hope this thread is closed ASAP. For people to use such vulgar language and be so rude is to me a much worse offense than the original post. We are a community who is varied but I hope decency and common courtesy is still the utmost importance.

Agreed, where is the moderator this post has been a way out of bounds and should be closed.

[BRANDYJ]

Agreed, where is the moderator this post has been a way out of bounds and should be closed.

I agree, but I trust the decision on the moderators even if it's not what I think about it. But I might want it closed for different reasons that you do. I just find it offensive to our GG members. I support the GG's that have said as much with their feelings being known in their posts to this disgusting thread.

[whowhatwhen]

It's not racist to find black guys attractive but it is racist to find them attractive because you think all of them are hung, aggressive thugs that just wants to rape you.

I should've been a little more descriptive but yeah, that's what I meant too.
:)

[Beverley Sims]

I have just read through the posts more closely and although there are issues about political correctness et al.
It is someone expressing a fantasy, if it was read on this basis it would not lead to all the stretches of imagination it has.
I am the recipient of dirty jokes by a number of people some of them gg's. The rule is if you don't like the joke move on, if it is to your liking comment or forward it on.
No hen fights or scratching eyes out just remember others see different things in the same situation.
Fantasy to one person is porn to another, so it is good to see the background of how something was written.
Remember a first time poster probably has less insight into the moral values on the forum than someone who has been here for a long time.
Even I have foot in mouth disease and misread the temperature of a situation.
Maybe I am wrong here but some posts need to be read with the experience or lack of the poster in mind.
A further comment... The bunfight seems to have evolved later in the post I notice the first few posters have put the lid on it nicely.
Also the thread is the original posters property and not some stage for later posters who have probably not even read the original post.
Hey! Please enjoy the rest of the day wherever you may be.

[Raquel June]

most of the time im a straight male, but at random times i get the urge to dress up as ****ty as possible and have sex with black men. and its only that, black men. but i dont understand why. when i have a girlfriend it feels great, but then out of no where i get random urges.

I dated a black girl with a strap-on. That might be the best of both worlds for you.

But I've met more than one white CD who is married and actually does do this -- dressing up as skanky as possible and picking up black guys. And still tries to say they're straight and love their wife. That's something we should all be offended by.

[whowhatwhen]

It's only gay if the balls touch...
XD

[Raquel June]

They say "eatin' ain't cheatin'." I guess that applies to chocolate bars, too.

[whowhatwhen]

What about "try before you bi"?

[ReineD]

Everyone, I've edited out TMI from a fantasy posted by someone on page one that obviously was missed before, and all the reaction to it including things getting way too personal.

If you think a post breaks the rules, please report it. If it doesn't break the rules and you don't agree with the sentiment, please reserve any name calling for PMs.

Edit
And seeing as how after 6 weeks the OP came back in yesterday with an update that she broke up with her girlfriend and is going ahead with the fantasy, there's no point keeping this thread opened since her original confusion seems to have been resolved.