Should I go out.....alone?

[Jessica86]

My wife tried again to get me to go out tonight....alone. I work nights, so I sleep during the day, and I am awake all night. I have never been out in public. I wanted to take her with me because I feel like it would be important to her. Recently, as in the past month or two, she has mentioned it a few times. Normally, I just dismiss it because she goes to sleep around 11pm. I have to stay up from 11pm to around 7am. She told me tonight to take some time for myself and go out dressed. I wanted to. I really did, but I guess I'm just a big chicken. I want her to go, because I don't want her to worry either. She says she won't, and always tells me to because I get very bored at night. Usually I just watch Netflix, play video games, or type on the site! I have to work all weekend, so I missed my chance. Monday night.....I'm wondering if I should go out. I have a few outfits picked out and everything. I just don't want to upset her, even though she accepts, and laughs, calling me chicken...lol. She says she has "plans" for us to go out and will let me know when it gets here. My guess is birthday.

[Princess29]

what sort of places were you thinking of going late at night jessica?

[Jessica86]

what sort of places were you thinking of going late at night jessica?

It might sound cheezy, but we have a beautiful lake around where I live. It's huge, and I have a special place I take my guitar to go play if I'm feeling down. It's a long walk out....kind of peninsula....and I would just love to go to get away for a while. I'm not really a club girl or anything.

[Cynthia Anne]

Jessica I think you should take your wife's advice and try going alone! Since it would be your first time it doesn't need to be anywhere special! The main thing is to stay safe! We don't want anything to happen to a pertty girl like you! Hugs!

[Secret_Dresser]

I would have to disagree about going alone as you said its your wife that wants you to.

I can understand not wanting to go out by yourself to begin with. Maybe you should explain to her why you dont want to go out alone.

If failing that then why not do a compromise and go out at say 10pm instead of later?

[Jessica86]

I would have to disagree about going alone as you said its your wife that wants you to.



Oh, I really want to go. I just didn't want to upset her going without her. I'm planning on Monday....just don't know. Usually beginning of the week I have work to do from the weekend. I will go though sometime next week.

[deebra]

Try an allnight Wal Mart, even if you just shop and walk the isles and are a little uncomfortable about going thru the checkout; it's safe , well lit and you could shop the fem clothes.

[deebra]

I just read your "Hillarious Thread", her little surprise "when the time is right" just might be her plans for the two of you going out, her crossdressed as a male and you as a female. She sounds a little intrigued in assuming the opposite gender and what it feels like, could be a great evening.

[Being Paige]

I would go out if I were you, you are so lucky to have a wife that accepts and actually wants you to get out! And she even wants to get out with you. I would be in heaven if I was in that situation.

[Jessica86]

I just read your "Hillarious Thread", her little surprise "when the time is right" just might be her plans for the two of you going out, her crossdressed as a male and you as a female. She sounds a little intrigued in assuming the opposite gender and what it feels like, could be a great evening.

That never occurred to me...yet...good possibility. That would be interesting!

[Contessa]

I used to be a wimp about going out too. Thinking I have go out with someone else, until I under stood this. Hey as Contessa I need to do my shopping for myself. So I got fully dressed and went right out the door. Smile don't nod your head, speak softly and no need for a big stick. Say Hello to anyone you meet especially GG's. They always smile back. Go to any large store you'll find open some stay open all night. Have already in mind what you're going to purchase. Pantyhose or knee high's should be on the list in your head. makeup of some kind and a med beverage. Never offer any info or say any words loudly. Just smile and proudly and politely hand over enough to complete your purchase. You should have a purse and or a good size female wallet held in one hand while waiting for any change. Sure count if you feel you should. Grab your bag, softly in an almost whisper say thanks smile and walk out. Find your keys before leaving the store, walk proudly with your head up.

Take out your phone and make a call to your wife and say I am on my way home or after I stop at. Never look around to see who is looking unless your in a not so well lit parking lot. Don't stare just walk to your car and get in. Once inside smile again I did it. Now go for a few dollars of gas, 5 on four please thanks. That will reassure that although people know you know too and are no longer fearful. Immediately upon your arrival at home go inside a release your purchases go directly into the bathroom close the door. Now look into the mirror and say "I told you you could do it."

After your first time you are considered a pro and can wait for your membership card to arrive in the mail. Or your keep it up until you have mastered it. Maybe even treat yourself to a new purse or wallet. I have myself taken the bus and the trolley in daytime and at night. I just enjoy these excursions. Today I even walked to the store with my two sons in mules, pink toenails and my purse. Oh yeah pink fingernails too. Sure people will laugh and may comment the same as you. Smiling is the only deterrent.

Good luck girl if that helps

Tess

[Stephenie S]

I say no, no, no.

It's dangerous to go out alone. You do understand, don't you, that you lose all your male privilege when you present to the world as a woman. All your life you have had the privilege to go where you want when you want. If you go out as a woman, you lose that ability.

Women do NOT go out alone at night to deserted peninsulas in the woods. Women don't even go to the bathroom alone, for goodness sake. There's a reason! It's because women who go out in the woods alone at night might not come back.

Listen, dear. Cops, drunks, and young men hopped up on testosterone and alcohol will ALL assume that a woman out alone at night is a "working" woman. And the consequences of such an assumption are things you don't want to have to deal with. If you want to go out during your available night time, then go to WalMart, or some supermarket where there are other people. Just stay away from deserted areas. We want you to continue to post here, OK?

S

[Launa]

[QUOTE=Stephenie S;2806382]I say no, no, no.

It's dangerous to go out alone. You do understand, don't you, that you lose all your male privilege when you present to the world as a woman. All your life you have had the privilege to go where you want when you want. If you go out as a woman, you lose that ability.

Women do NOT go out alone at night to deserted peninsulas in the woods. Women don't even go to the bathroom alone, for goodness sake. There's a reason! It's because women who go out in the woods alone at night might not come back.

Listen, dear. Cops, drunks, and young men hopped up on testosterone and alcohol will ALL assume that a woman out alone at night is a "working" woman. And the consequences of such an assumption are things you don't want to have to deal with. If you want to go out during your available night time, then go to WalMart, or some supermarket where there are other people. Just stay away from deserted areas. We want you to continue to post here, OK?

Yeah, I say go out but stay away from parks, lonely wooded areas and such. Go to stores etc.. I was at a group one time and a guy told me that he was dressed in his car at night in a local park. He said 6 cops came and checked him out. They thought he was working. In the end it was all good but it was a fairly big scene.

[Kaz]

As long as you go to a safe place you'll be fine... Take it slowly. Your photos look good and don't suggest any major issues and at night, we are less exposed to being 'read'. The basic issue is that you don't want some nutter attacking you!

Once out though you will love it... It is such an amazing sensation!

[kimdl93]

I would. I would start at fairly safe places...like an all night care or deli perhaps.

I'm very curious what your wife has planned. The anticipation must be killing you!

[DonnaT]

The only way you'll know if it's right for you is to do it. And since you really want to, then do.

Some agonize and agonize over going out, and never do, only to regret it later on in life. Some go out and find it no big deal, and don't go any more. Others go further.

Don't lock your keys in the car, however ;)

[LeannL]

Have you thought of going to a midnight movie or something like that? I agree that the woods are not a good place for your first outing since it could be your last! At that hour, you need to find a place with people around you for safety but not the wrong people that could cause you harm. Is there a chance you could go out earlier?

Good luck,

Leann

[Lorileah]

I go out alone frequently. I just sit and people watch. Kim made an excellent suggestion for a cafe, like Denny's. I go to bars as they are open at night and you could watch sports or talk to the bartender. The park? I dunno, but if you like it then why not? Seems sort of isolated though (clubs bars and cafes all have people around). Wandering a store sounds sort of creepy to me too, but then I don't go to 24 hr stores very often.

There are times and places I like to go alone. There are times and places I prefer company.

[Jessica Keys]

I see you are stright down from me in TX. That means it will not get dark till about 8:30. I would be fine with you doing the "lake thing" if you could be home by dark time.....otherwise "NO". I single gurl by the lake in the trees by herself....and lets face it... a CD to boot....in the cowboy state of Texas...are you nuts?

[carhill2mn]

One suggestion as to where you could go alone is to go grocery shopping someplace that is in a "safe" area. In addition to being out en femme you would be helping.

[Barbara Ella]

Having never been out i feel perfectly in place talking about this..... But I do think about it a lot, and will go out this summer.

I must agree..SAFETY. Start with a twilight outing that is simple, like gassing car, a drive through for a burger, etc. Going out after dark, especially until you get used to doing it and have scoped out the safest places, is taking quite a big bite. But if you can chew really fast, go for it.

Whatever you do, go for it with confidence. I think your wife wants you to build your confidence, and probably thinks the best way is for you to own what you do and not rely on her to do it for you.

Own it girl.

Barbara

[Cheryl T]

Go for it...go for a drive, enjoy a beautiful night....just be careful.
A woman out solo late at night is an easy target.
Common sense as what to avoid and where not to go and you will be fine.

[Kathy10]

Maybe you should just go out for a drive. I recently did just that and believe it or not I found it to be a joy. I drove to a nearby city about 30 miles from my home and stopped at their 24 hour Walmart. Purchased some make up items and paid through the self checkout. I then stopped and filled at the pumps and headed back home. The best part was that there was an older gentleman getting gas across the way and I noticed he was checking me out. (if he only knew) I was not wearing anything to sexy, normal day career women's dress. Just a blouse, skirt with off black hose and a 2 inch pump. In all I was out for about 3 to 4 hours and enjoyed every minute of it. You should go for it.

[Sue Too]

I'm amazed that you would even consider going to a deserted area as you describe. My Gosh Girl!!, don't you read the newspaper and listen to the news? A single woman, alone, in the deep of night is a perfect target for the wierdos and kooks. Clear the pink fog out of your brain and turn your head around. The year is 2012

I can fully appreciate your desire to go out en femme but use some judgement as to where you go. Some have suggested Walmart or other all night store......or a movie. All these are better ideas than you had. Get wise, get smart. As I said, this is 2012. We dont want to hear about you on the Tuesday News at 10!!!!! Please stay safe.

Susan in Phoenix

[Alice B]

The simple fact that your wife not only accepts, but encourages you to go out is exceptional. You can go to a local transgenderd bar that is open to 2AM, or go for a drive, set some gas and stop at a convience store for something. The thing is that no one will care and you can enjoy the new freedom.

[Sam-antha]

Going out alone does not just mean going out where there is nobody else around. I used to be out most nights - in fact there was a time when, if I was not at work etc, then Sam-antha was out, alone. Years ago. Bars - be careful -, coffee, late night shopping seems fine, but there was none then. Just get it into your pretty little head that girls do go out at night. Certainly not late, but they do go out. Like Alice b says, but do realise that you either must have company if you leave the bar late, or a car with a mobile just round the corner. It is a man's world out there late at night, no matter what it seems like.
Play along with your wife for the first time, she knows.
~Samm

[Helen_Highwater]

As someone who's making those first tentative forays out as Helen I would suggest, as others have said, places such as all night stores. Most big supermarkets in the UK have recycling facilities and I'm guessing also in the US so if you're not confident of going into the store at least take a walk across the car park and use those, visit a well lit cash dispenser or post a letter. There are a number of little ventures that you can take to build confidence. You at least have the safety cage that is your car close by but again as others have said, no no no to a trip into the woods.

[NathalieX66]

I've gone out alone many times, it's pretty old hat for me.
I shop and dine anywere/anytime, and buy coffee at Starbucks.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/nathalielandree/6089117334/in/set-72157627537358072/

Though, recently I had a friend who went out en femme with his wife to a wine bar, and was touched and fondled by the owner of the wine bar while his wife was in the ladies room. The owner of the wine bar is gay....but still no excuse.....just not cool.

[pernille d]

A hard call . Yes I agree with all of you that nr 1 is to be safe. But how many of you remember the run up to going out the first time. = something you want to do but your terrified to do it. So of cause I can understand the choice of a lonely place away from people . The first time I was out I went to a park and walked no more than 100 meters from my car and I live in a very safe country . Of all the deserted places I choose late at night a guy came cycling by on his bike. !!!! OMG that shows that even deserted places there can also be people .so be CAREFULL . Ot seems easier to go to s lonely place bit again ad said why would a GG be there alone they don't do that. Since that evenining I thought what the heck and just went to the local city and walled about . I got a few double takes but nothing I could not handle. I surgest a mall or any of the other places open at night . Yes it will scare you to death to start with but once you have had the first contact, you will find it's not at all that scary + it's safer

Why do we go out ???? it's to fit in, have some fun, and to be seen. Express outselves etc . We all have our reasons to go out but i think the underlieing trend is to be seen . So do what you think is right but be safe and maybe a checkout girl my grin or a waiter give you a funny look in a diner but that is a lot less harmless than getting attacked in a park or stopped by the cops

[Jessica86]

Thanks to all who responded. I kind of chuckled at the "cops, drunks, and criminals," comment. That was just one giant stereotype. Never in my life have I looked at any woman who was out alone and thought...hmmm...she's "working." I'm just getting back from Easter break, and have been celebrating my wife's birthday tonight. A few drinks, and now tonight is over. I don't drive after drinking anything, so again....I must wait. I will have to aim later in the week as I have work until Friday. Lots of things going on, and just looking for relief. Thanks for the ideas girls! Probably just go for a drive the first time. After all, I can always build on it later.

[serinalynn]

I like dressing as a woman, I also don't pass,and I restrict my going out to daylight hours only and to places I trust. With that said, It, relives some anxiety my wife has about being shot or beaten up because I dres like a woman. I am at the mall usually when the doors open at 10:00AM and am usually home well before 4:00PM. Being Married I won't go out at night without her. I may be dressed like a woman, but my wife is there and we will have a good time.