"Hello Ladies" in male mode!

[Eryn]

I had an odd thing happen to me this evening. I was in drab. Most of the clothes I was wearing (Levi's 505 blue jeans, hooded rust-colored jacket with beige lining) were from the female side of the store but none of them were recognizable as feminine. My hair is in a short masculine style. My nails are slightly longer than my fingertips and I keep clear polish on them.

I took my wife and her sister to dinner at an Italian restaurant. We were seated in a booth at the end of the room and I was facing away from the entry. The waitress, a nice young lady in her 20s, walked up and said "Hello, would you ladies like a beverage?"

Now, being referred to in this way gives me a warm feeling while dressed but it was a bit shocking in drab! I figured that she just didn't get a look at me as she walked up. We ordered drinks and asked the waitress a couple of questions about the menu items, so she had a good chance to see and talk to me.

Now for the odd bit. She continued to refer to our trio as "ladies" throughout the meal!

So, what's going on? Am I "leaking?" I don't see clear-polished nails and gender-neutral clothing as terribly strong feminine cues!

I'm afraid that it will remain a mystery, but it was amusing and a bit flattering. :battingeyelashes:

[Persephone]

Yowza, Eryn! Baffling indeed! And I hope it didn't discombobulate your visitor.

Perhaps you are just beginning to ooze feminine ectoplasm?

If so, congratulations are in order!

Hugs
Persephone.

[Cynthia Anne]

Quite interesting to say the least! Perhaps she knows more then you think! Then again perhaps she prefered not to talk to you!ha, ha I doubt it! Hugs!

[Jorja]

I vote for oozing feminine ectoplasm.

[STACY B]

Gift horse ,, Rememeber ,, Think about it ?

[ronda]

i would be in haven if that happen to me

[Sandra1746]

The server's initial impression was that you were female. She probably realized it was wrong quickly but since you didn't correct her she decided not to risk pressing the issue and continued with the female pronoun. I have had similar situations in stores and sometimes the SA correct themselves, sometimes not.

It is amusing and makes one wonder what cues people use to assign gender at first glance. It's also a nice gift; enjoy the day.

Enjoy,
Sandra1746

[LaurenB]

The same thing just happened to my wife and I last week. The waitress, though, corrected herself and apologized. I just smiled and said no worries. I was in drab but also very neutral. My nails were a little long, my hair is getting long and my wife and I chat like two ladies most of the time. It was the highlight of my week too.

[BillieJoEllen]

Eryn, don't be too sure that the clothes you were wearing weren't recognizable as "female'. I have a few pairs of jeans and some sweatshirts that I would never wear out in public while trying to present as drab. I always look like I'm wearing women's clothes when I have them on. I think for the sweatshirts its the subtle shades of color. The pants might be the shape. And you did say you had finger nail polish on. How was your voice? I think some people can pick up on these things quite easily.

[Eryn]

Eryn, don't be too sure that the clothes you were wearing weren't recognizable as "female'. I have a few pairs of jeans and some sweatshirts that I would never wear out in public while trying to present as drab. I always look like I'm wearing women's clothes when I have them on. I think for the sweatshirts its the subtle shades of color. The pants might be the shape. And you did say you had finger nail polish on. How was your voice? I think some people can pick up on these things quite easily.

I have a few jeans like that, but my Levi's are unembellished and don't fit overly tightly. They were also under the table in a booth and mostly out of sight. The sweatshirt could go either way, but I have male clothes the same color. My voice is quite male and i wasn't making any effort to soften it. My haircut (plenty of gray in my hair) and glasses are both fairly masculine.

The only really femme cues were my nails (clear polish only, but shiny) and my guy-mode shoulder bag, a miniature nylon messenger bad colored beige with a dark purple stripe.

Our guest didn't make any mention of it and i doubt that it was as interesting to her as it was to me.

In any case, it was fun and nothing bad happened. :)

[busker]

I had an odd thing happen to me this evening. I was in drab. Most of the clothes I was wearing (Levi's 505 blue jeans, hooded rust-colored jacket with beige lining) were from the female side of the store but none of them were recognizable as feminine. My hair is in a short masculine style. My nails are slightly longer than my fingertips and I keep clear polish on them.

I took my wife and her sister to dinner at an Italian restaurant. We were seated in a booth at the end of the room and I was facing away from the entry. The waitress, a nice young lady in her 20s, walked up and said "Hello, would you ladies like a beverage?"

Now, being referred to in this way gives me a warm feeling while dressed but it was a bit shocking in drab! I figured that she just didn't get a look at me as she walked up. We ordered drinks and asked the waitress a couple of questions about the menu items, so she had a good chance to see and talk to me.

Now for the odd bit. She continued to refer to our trio as "ladies" throughout the meal!

So, what's going on? Am I "leaking?" I don't see clear-polished nails and gender-neutral clothing as terribly strong feminine cues!

I'm afraid that it will remain a mystery, but it was amusing and a bit flattering. :battingeyelashes:

I have heard women addressed as "hi guys" and maybe it was just that there were 2 women and you just got included as one of the ladies so the greeting "ladies" . I'm certain it was nothing sinister and probably not making a note of any telling signs from your attire. You could have corrected her, as well, but chose not to.

[Brigid]

I use to have this same experience in the past. I did have longer hair and did not have any facial hair then. I always wore blousy renaissance type shirts which I guess made my appearance more feminine. It really bugged my wife a lot that I would be called a lady so I grew a beard and mustache. Eryn it does kind of make you feel good. You wonder if you really could pass if you went completely enfemme.

[Persephone]

You wonder if you really could pass if you went completely enfemme.

Brigid, my spouse and I have been out to dinner and have gone many places with Eryn and her spouse and there has never been so much as a raised eyebrow, so I vote for the fact that enfemme she can definitely pass.

Remember, with two CD's out together the chances of being read go up by times 4* even though being with our spouses does tend to reduce the number a bit.

Hugs,
Persephone.

* - Persephone's formula, P=2En, the probability of being read is 2 to the power of n, where n is the number of crossdressers. So two CD's are four times as likely to be read, three are eight time as likely, four are sixteen times, etc.

[Eryn]

I love that formula, and think that it is sooo true! Let's see, the last big dinner I went to had about 15 of us present, so the likelihood of being made was, hmmm, P=2^15, or about 33,000 times more than being out alone.

Although there likely should be another finegalfactor for how many of the ladies are over 6' tall :)

[KellyJameson]

I believe femininity is a state of mind that expresses itself as a felt energy by others. She was responding to your real self in my opinion.

When people experience this energy in someone but the package it is housed in does not look like how they have been taught to think it should they experience anxiety. Her age may be why she still has this ability to feel instead of think so lives closer to reality and not subjective illusion so responded
according to the truth of her felt perceptions.