Why do I like being referred to as “she?”

[Michaella]

I’m quite sure I would never transition in any way, not surgery, not hormones, not even living full time as a woman. I really do think I’m a male who enjoys being feminine, for whom it is all about the clothes.

But, but . . . I admit I get a kick out of going out and presenting myself as a woman. Even the words themselves are exciting for me. A friend referred to me as “she,” and that felt wonderful.

So, what does that mean? Anything? Or is it just the verbal equivalent of wearing nylons?

Michaella

[DanaR]

I think that having someone refer to you as "she" gives you a feeling of acceptance. If it comes from a GG, it makes me feel good.

[larry07]

I may be in the minority here, but I prefer to use the male pronoun and my male name. I consider myself a crossdresser, in other words a man who often wears women's clothes. If I used a female name or presented as female then I might be transgendered but no longer crossdressing. I appreciate that there is such a range of gender expression and variety on this site and that all are welcomed wherever they are in that range. What works for me may not work for someone else and that is what makes this so fun and interesting.

[docrobbysherry]

They only time that's been used for me is here. I've gotten quite used to being a "she" online.

No one has, nor do I think anyone will EVER refer to me as "she" when I'm out! Unless they r blind and deaf!

[kimdl93]

OK, I'll admit that it feels good to be referred to as she, her, ma'am - whatever as long as its feminine. Why? Well, the short answer is that when I'm dressed, I think of myself as female and its very affirming when others see me as such or at least realize that by presenting as female, I might prefer to be referred to accordingly.

[katie_barns]

I love being referred to as she when dressed. I am like you and never going to transition, I am just a CD and maybe transgender, but transitioning is not in my future.
I do believe that being referred to as she is more of a confirmation of my success at presenting myself as female. When dressed and letting my feminine side out I want to be looked at as female. Pronouns go with the image I am presenting. The occasional 'madam', or 'miss' is great. I love when men hold a door for me. Even in drab, I don't mind the occasional 'she' with the people I am out too.

To me it's the equivalent of you did a great job and the couple hours I took getting ready was worth it.

[ArleneRaquel]

I love it, makes my day, especially it it come from a woman.

[Beverley Sims]

For me the whole idea of cding is to carry off a disguise as a woman.
Not to fool or trick anyone but for self satisfaction that I can carry it off.
I love conversations among women that are female orientated and include me in the group forgetting that I am male.
The occasional reference to me as a male only enhances any success that I may have in my "Deception."
I do not look as good these days but bearing and confidence lowers the others guard.
I have been told I am a 'bitch" and I love it along with "she".:)

[katie_barns]

I have been told I am a 'bitch" and I love it along with "she".:)

I had a fellow CD call me that once when I told her I could fit into a size 9. I was so thrilled I huged 'her'

[Contessa]

Its no longer a secret that I wear women's clothes and walk around outside and go places dressed like that. I don't want it to be a secret that I am a man I would rather they think of victor victoria a women playing a man that dresses like a woman. The fact that I don't fool any one living near me is great. People say hello to me even though I look feminine and they know. The puzzled look is just because they can't figure this out. I would tell them don't try this alone at home you could learn to love it. I think my purse is my cloak of safety that doesn't cover me.

Wow I am going to put that in my signature.

Ta Ta for now

Tess

[Cynthia Anne]

Has a nice ring to it doesn't it! It always outs a smile on my face!:) It comes with the teritory! If you 'pass' or at least look good it makes you feel special in a sense! Hugs!

[Kate Simmons]

I dunno Hon, it's pretty much just a pronoun. I prefer using a person's name and gender isn't usually a part of it.:)

[NicoleScott]

Larry (post #3), I'm like you, a crossdresser, a guy who likes to wear women's clothes. But unlike you, I prefer to use a female name when I am crossdressed. I go by two rules for addressing crossdressers: 1) I use names and pronouns that reflect what they want to be called. 2) if I don't know what they want to be called, I use pronouns that reflect how they present (if possible). People should comply with your wish to be known as a male.
I use a female name for two reasons: I go out some (not as much as when younger). When I first went into a tg-friendly club, I was greeted by a bartender with "Welcome, what's your name?" I felt much more comfortable using a female name, even if I was an obvious crossdresser. Second reason: except for my wife knowing that I crossdress, I'm in the closet, and don't want to use my real name.
As you said, Larry, everone has different reasons and they should be respected.
I was called Mr. Scott in a post by a TS in a tiff, in an effort to offend me. I'm not that thin-skinned, and it didn't work.
Looking back, I crossdressed in private for a long time before having an online identity or going into a club. I just didn't need one until then.

[Cheryl T]

When I'm presenting as a woman that is how I prefer to be addressed.
It irks me when someone says "he" or "him" or whatever when they refer to me or any cd friends when we are out as women.
I go to great ends to make myself presentable as a woman and then I'm in a store or somewhere and someone goes "he prefers...." It's like fingernails on a chalkboard.

[KimberlyJean]

In a perfect fantasy world I would be able to switch back and forth, be a GG one minute then back to myself the next. Since that will never happen I accomplish it by dressing up. When I am dressed in my mind I am a woman, when I am not dressed I am a man. I know I would never transition through surgery but I want to feel, act, and be treated like a woman. And I love being called Ma'am, Babe, Dear, or any other female terms of endearment.

[KayleahDee]

All I can say about that is join the club. it's happened to me, even when I am NOT in makeup! Mostly because of my hair, actually. It's nicely coiffed. I just laugh it off & continue in my way.

[Launa]

I prefer to be called by a female name if I'm dressed that way, I just haven't found a good name I like right now but I also really don't care if I'm called he or she unless someone is trying to start an arguement or be problem.

[stacycoral]

Has a nice ring to it doesn't it! It always outs a smile on my face!:) It comes with the teritory! If you 'pass' or at least look good it makes you feel special in a sense! Hugs!


I love it, makes my day, especially it it come from a woman.


I think that having someone refer to you as "she" gives you a feeling of acceptance. If it comes from a GG, it makes me feel good.

These ladies have said how i feel, there is nothing better!!

[Lynn Marie]

I hang out with a bunch of local CD's. We all refer to each other as she and her as long as we are presenting as "she" or "her". Otherwise we are "him". That sort of makes sense with us. Now I do love having a man open a door for me or being referred to as mam. It's really a thrill.

[gender_blender]

I get "she" just as much in loose clothing/no makeup as when I'm dressed up nice. I feel it's feedback of my constant presentation by social standards, although I'm reluctant to assign such pronoun usage to myself personally.

[Violetgray]

I get "she" just as much in loose clothing/no makeup as when I'm dressed up nice. I feel it's feedback of my constant presentation by social standards, although I'm reluctant to assign such pronoun usage to myself personally.

From what I've seen, you get "she" in loose clothing because no one would suspect you had ever been male. Most people are respectful, but I've read many posts where someone was out and about and not only got "sir" but "SIR."

So is that to say that you don't have a preferred pronoun? Or are you just taking a "whatever that person is comfortable with" approach?



Anyway, I used to be completely ambiguous about it, but as I got older, I've come to enjoy being "she." If I'm honest I find "he" to be unpleasant when I'm dressed. I never insist that they make a correction though.

[suzy1]

A part of me is Suzy. It’s real, not just pretending. I am trans.
So I am a she but I have to come here to be addressed as she.
A big part of the importance of this forum.

[EjayeCD]

I took my mother, 83, for her birthday with my sister. I have long hair which is really long for a guy, and when I helped another elderlady out of the restauraunt when we were walking in, the hostess said "HIGH LADIES'. When I turned around she was freaked. I asked if I could have a ladies discouunt. NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Jacqueline Winona]

Lol, Ejaye! Michaela, it just means you're comfortable in this part of your skin, just enjoy it, don't worry about why. :)