More wacky stuff from job hunting...need to vent

[jamie_44]

I spoke with a an employment recruitment agent about a job with a company a few hours from home...after speaking with him about my background...he said everything looked like a good fit for me and he would set up a face to face interview...I next told him that I am transgender...he paused for awhile...and he then decided that he needs to set up a skype interview with just him and I before scheduling my face to face...how pathetic...tomorrow it happens..I am going to ask him if he would do the same thing with everybody or does he and his company discriminate against handicapped, overweight. skinny, minorities or does his company only act in this manner with the trans community...I have another offer with a local company and will not be proceeding with him...I want to educate him!

[kimdl93]

Congratulations on the local offer. I must say, the recruiter handled that clumsily. On the other hand, tomorrow you'll educate him with your usual grace and decorum.

[AllieSF]

Not being there and hearing the full exchange between both of you, it is hard to understand all that went on. One take may be that he wants to see you and maybe help prep you to get the job. If he hasn't worked with trasgenders before this may be a first for him and he wants to see you face to face, via Skype, in order to help you just present yourself well. He has probably met a lot of different job seekers over time, and has a lot of stories to tell about people who dress improperly, or were complete idiots in front of companies that he arranged to interview them. His success depends on the success of his job seeker in getting a job, and it could also depend on the quality of the applicants that he sends to the companies for interviews. If he sends the wrong people, they may not agree to work with him in the future. A lot of good recruiters have worked hard to establish decent credentials with potential employers for their job seekers. That being said, it does not mean what he is doing is right or wrong. It really depends on how he answers and reacts to your questions as to why the need for face to face after you revealed that you are transgendered. Based on what you wrote, I would give him the benefit of the doubt until he says something that justifies being taught a lesson. If he is discriminating against you, then he definitely needs that lesson.

[Badtranny]

...I want to educate him!

I don't know Jamie, I suspect he may have already been "educated" and learned that he'd better get a look at your presentation before he puts his reputation on the line. I'm sorry to say that there are TG women who don't put the work in and expect everyone to treat them like women with all the attendant courtesies, while they have booming voices and a beard shadow. I have a question though, why did you feel you have to mention you were TG? Are you that insecure about your presentation?

I make a lot of hay around here about being out and proud but that doesn't mean I introduce myself as trans, it just means I'm not hiding from my past. Now that it's no longer obvious, I would only bring it up in a job interview to resolve questions about work history. If you still look like you are TG, then I'm afraid he is not wrong to request a private meeting first. If I was hiring you, I would do the same thing. If you thought it was important enough to bring up, then I would have to see how far along you are before I brought you into my office.

Transition takes a long time and a lot of work ladies. The world does not owe us anything and it is incumbent on us to get as close to real as we can.

[Katesback]

I just have to wonder why you even told him you are transgender. Is your paperwork correct? Meaning you had your name changed.

If that is a yes then what the hell is the point of telling anyone at work your transgender? I mean really? If your a woman then be a woman? Ohhh I forgot you might be a proud tranny and I suppose that would be reason to tell people but then you sure as hell arent a woman if your a proud tranny now are ya? At least not in the eyes of those your the proud tranny too.

It is astounding at how many trans people shoot themselves in the feet so often.

Katie

[Chickhe]

By highlighting that you are TG it becomes important and they want to learn more. They might not know anything about you and you should be polite in how you tell them it didn't make you feel good. For example, I once had some work done and the person recommending the person said to me...oh, and they are black! ...to me it doesn't matter, but it actually did matter because this person doing the work took every opportunity to play the sympathy card, when really, if they just did the work like they said they would there would be no issue for anyone. For an employment agency, they are representing you, so if you are different they need to understand in what way and how to work with it.

[Sharon]

I just have to wonder why you even told him you are transgender. Is your paperwork correct? Meaning you had your name changed.

If that is a yes then what the hell is the point of telling anyone at work your transgender? I mean really? If your a woman then be a woman? ......

It is astounding at how many trans people shoot themselves in the feet so often.

Katie

I agree with Kate, though her aside about "proud tranny" may be irrelevant in your case. Provide your legal name and standard resume information and no more.

It's too late to undo what's happened, Jamie, but if this interview doesn't result in a job offer, then I hope you learn from your error. Zip it from now on. :)

Either way -- good luck!

[arbon]

Hi Jamie

I was wondering if you informed the other company as well, or if you are planning to do so?

[Julia_in_Pa]

I agree with Kate, Sharon and Theresa (Arbon) on this.

Admitting you are trans was not in your best interest.
Is your voice correct? How's your total presentation? Do you have your paperwork in order?

As Melissa said, the recruiter might have already been educated about you by you telling him you are trans.
In my opinion the recruiter has already made up his mind. Skype isn't going to give him any sort of idea how you look or present.

Your a woman right? Next time go in with your head held high and just be the woman you are. Not the trans woman, not the woman with a birth defect but the woman you are!!

We are on your side Jamie that's the reason why we are telling you like it is.


Julia




I just have to wonder why you even told him you are transgender. Is your paperwork correct? Meaning you had your name changed.

If that is a yes then what the hell is the point of telling anyone at work your transgender? I mean really? If your a woman then be a woman? Ohhh I forgot you might be a proud tranny and I suppose that would be reason to tell people but then you sure as hell arent a woman if your a proud tranny now are ya? At least not in the eyes of those your the proud tranny too.

It is astounding at how many trans people shoot themselves in the feet so often.

Katie

[jamie_44]

I had a face to face with the other company...they have already met me...I only do this as a courtesy to recruiters that are sending me to face to face interviews...and everybody..I have tried it both ways...its a tuff struggle...you arre not female until you have the final surgery...

Katie...I do not introduce myself as a tranny...I have lived full time for 3 years...came out in my first job...unemplyd awhile..landed another job...been unemployed and struggling somewhat this time (the 50's may have a psychological factor with me?)...I have been told by friends, guys, that I pass very well....and yes I came from being a proud tranny to get where I am at today....I will not feel like a complete woman until I have final grs...its just my internal make up...thank you for the feedback...I appreciate your honesty.

Thanks Julia....I appreciate the feedback...there are more issues to me struggling with the unemplymt this time....my goal was to have grs before I turned 50 but unfortunatley it has not happened bcause I have to finacially support others...makes me sad...my voice is very difficult for me...not sure why,,,I only have one vocal chord that works....anyway you have helped me and I am grateful!

[Julia_in_Pa]

Jamie,

Please don't feel sad.

I know personally how hard all of this is.
I'm very pleased you have another offer.

Your head held high will lead you. :)


Julia

[LeannL]

The EEOC just ruled yesterday that discrimination in employment or hiring is sex discrimination under Title VII. As of yesterday, what just happened to you is illegal. Please see:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/04/24/transgender-employees-anti-discrimination-law-eeoc-_n_1449282.html?ref=gay-voices

Good luck,

Leann

[Aprilrain]

I sometimes have the urge to tell people though I'm not sure why but I always resist. Being TS dosen't get you brownie points with cis folks. I think the less we make of it the easier it is for them to deal with. Im always surprised at the number of people who seem to not want to know the truth, they'd rather have their shadow of a doubt, just read some of the post in the loved ones section. "I wish he'd never told me". So give em what they want! Who cares how bad your voice is, let them think you are a woman with only one working vocal cord ; )

[Ana5551]

Recently I too was job hunting, and told all potential employers upfront I was Trans. Why, because everyone does background checks and you can summarily be dismissed, even after starting a job if you misrepresent your past education, experience, and yes, lie about past names. Depending on what you do and who you work for, it is a necessity.

[jamie_44]

Hi y'all...just to let u know..my skype interview went over extremely well..the recruiter said I am a top candidate...we were even giggling at the end of the session...really nice! Anyway I thank all of you very much for your responses...as always I can count on you girls for help..hugs to all...one thing I do not understand is why someone has to be nasty mouthed all the time and dear sweetie if u read this..u know who u are...almost all your responses to girls on this site
are biting hateful like comments...I always tell people that act in that manner to take it outside and away from me..I dont live that way and dont care to be around people who need to live that way....have a super weekend everyone...

[Kaitlyn Michele]

Very happy for you Jamie..I hope it works out!

[AllieSF]

Congratulations Jamie. It appears that it was no where near as bad as you had anticipated and that the recruiter was actually working for your interests. Now, what are the next steps? Are you going to go for another interview with the company,. or are you going to take the first job?

As to the thread turd dropper, try to look for the positive and ignore all the rest of the BS and negative attitudes in her posts.

[GirlieAmanda]

Recently I too was job hunting, and told all potential employers upfront I was Trans. Why, because everyone does background checks and you can summarily be dismissed, even after starting a job if you misrepresent your past education, experience, and yes, lie about past names. Depending on what you do and who you work for, it is a necessity.

Your point just became invalid thank God because of the recent EEOC ruling. It is NONE on the employers business if you had another name or why you had it. All that they should be concerned about is work. All of my docs say Female and I changed all education records and former company records. All they need is Name, SSN and references. Nothing else is ANY of their business. This is not the FBI, its a job. I am applying as a female.