buying pantyhose

[KittyMuffin]

I don't want this to be off topic but I was in Shop Rite last week cause I needed to get some new 'hose and I kept tellimg myself not to be nervous but it didn't work. I got really flustered but managed to get in and out.

Well today I did it again and I carried myself better. The secret? I wrote up a fake list and made like I was buying them for somebody else. I was still a bit uneasy but a heck of a lot more settled than last week.

I should mention that prior to last week I did ALL of my femme shopping on eBay so this was a bit step for me. I hope that this story could offer helpful advice to others who may be self-conscious.

Of course, women were looking at me strangely in the makeup aisle, but I did manage to get a nice 3-color kit. Now picking out the right eye shadow and bra... that will be a challenge!

[tifftg]

Kitty, good for you for confronting your fears and taking these steps. The woman were probably thinking what a great guy you are buying something so personal for your girlfriend or wife. In any event they didn't start screaming or rolling over and laughing. Go for it girl.


Been there, know the feeling, got past it.

Tiff

[obsessedwithpantyhose]

the clerks dont care what u buy so long as u spend ur money in their store:D

[_Janelle_]

I think part of it is simply having self confidence - if you can keep your confidence up then you feel you can do whatever you want. That having been said, I went shopping for new heels on Sunday, and there were alot more folk there than I expected and lost my bottle so to speak (brit way of saying I lost my nerve) and left empty handed - they really didn't have much in my size anyway, so it looks like it will be the internet for me for a while. I buy all my hose and panties through the onehanesplace site - just got a package today :)

Janelle

[Wendy me]

i think we as cd's think that we are being read when we buy things and although most people could care less what we buy we think that everyone is watching us ... when the need to buy something is strong enough then we tend to just say the hell with it and plunge right in .....now think abought chrismass time or v day and the guys looking through the laddys deparment no one is going omg a guy buying womans things .... it's realy the same all year no one realy cares abought what you buy.....

[Kierci]

:iagree: :thumbup: :wave: :yt:

[Kim E]

Wendy is right on. Other shoppers and store clerks could care less what you buy.

Sometime ago, I was wandering around Fashion Bug in drab by myself. Asked the young female clerk where the nightgowns were. She asked flannel or something sexy. I said sexy and she took me over and showed me the selection. I picked out an off white lace babydoll with matching bikini. While at the checkout, the clerk said "She's gonna love this". I grinned and said "Oh, I'm sure she will". ;)

So, just go in the store, look around and get what you need, like you do it all the time and you'll be fine. :)

Hugs ~ Kim

[Jodi Lynn]

I have only ever had 1 salesgirl say something to me over the years. I was at a Riteaid and picked up a pair of pantyhose, and as I was paying for them she asked "What you going to do with these, rob a bank." I just smiled and went on my way. And congrats on the big step hun, before you know there will be no stopping you.

[Dayna]

Store shopping is one of my favorite activities--it really gives me a rush!

Am I the only one who selfishly looks forward to Valentines Day and Mothers Day?! Would love to know how many women actually receive gifts of lingerie, vs. how much is purchased!!

Confidence is key; if you are worried about what the clerk is thinking (you shouldn't--you're not the first guy who has gone thru her lane with girly items, I assure you!), try these lines:

- If this isn't what she wanted, can I return it?

- Do you have any gift boxes for this?

- Have you ever worn these? They feel yummy! (worked at One Hanes Place!!)

It's also nice to see more and more discount and grocery stores putting in self-service checkouts!

-d

[TGMarla]

When I need pantyhose, I just buy it. Period. As for other stuff, I just force myself to get it. Like the shoes I just bought? I told the checkout lady to give me a gift receipt for it. She commented that she liked them, never checked the size, and I smiled and told her that my wife had had her eye on them, and told me that if they went on sale, to grab them. Well, they went on sale.:D

[dawnmcdaniels]

as time goes on you start to realize that the other girls are right. Others simply don't care. We have it in our heads that they are looking at sizes butthey arent. Besides if they perk up just tell them that you work at a funeral home and larger sizes go on the bodies easier...That usually shuts them up.

[KittyMuffin]

LOL @ the funeral home idea!!! That's funny!

Yes I suppose the only real way to dispense with the feelings of self-consciousness is to force myself to actually buy things in person, not hide behind a computer screen. Of course, many stores don't have heels in size 12... not the hot ones anyway!

But seriously, if I went there and started trying on women's shoes I might be asked to leave. Finding my size was a metter of trial and error. I awkwardly bought stuff at flea markets and I eventually figured it out. I was nervous then, even more so because my mom was about as well (I wasn't old enough to drive), but I survived. So I guess I just gotta keep with it and it'll become easier.

[dawnmcdaniels]

There are a million excuses you can use to buy womens clothing. If you find a boutique and you want to shop just go in and look around when you are ready tell them a story like your an employee of a large firm with many offices ie car dealer firefighter etc. and the new guy from each office has to dress up at a fundraisiing dinner as a waitress or serve coctails etc. Usually they will walk you through the whole deal and even assist you in trying stuff on. And yes I often use the funeralk home bit because I usually do my shopping at night and I make it look like i am on an errand. Someday Ill consider shopping enfemme but as of now I have really no chance of passing but I am working on it.

[KittyMuffin]

me too. i can't pass. no way! but i am working on some gradual changes to make myself feel more comfortable. i will let my hair grow and use conditioner to make it shiny! i'm going to be wearing soft clothes and long sleeve blouses. checking on ebay right now! hehe

[Nicole Lee]

I know the feeling. I'm still young and getting started on this whole thing of actually going out and buying clothes (when I was younger, I used to steal from my cousins' clothes drawers. :eek:). Like a few days ago, I went to buy some cute low-rise cotton panties (6 pack by Fruit of the Loom), and I was sooo nervous when I was browsing through the racks at Target. :D

The fake list idea is definitely a great idea, perhaps I'll try it some time. :D

[christine55]

I do almost all my shopping femme now and pretty much get by. Before when I always shopped in male mode I would go somewhere that no one would know me and just go in and buy whatever I needed. It was embarrassing and I would get some funny looks but it was always worth it when I go home and got dressed.
Hugs, Christine

[darcyann]

Hello

I was scared for the longest time myself. But not anymore. If they ask if it is for me I just tell tell yes and I bet it makes them wonder what I look like dressed up. Maybe someday even get a date lol(well maybe not) Just be funny about it, and if you are serious about it they will belive you and if you are nervous they will know exactly what you are doing, but if you are funny about it they will just think you are joking, just have fun with it lol. And in the long run it is none of there busisness anyway.


Love


Darcy Ann

[pedebra]

After the first few times, buying hose should not be a problem. I have only had one bad reaction from a counter person and that was only a dirty look from a teenage . Another time when I was buying a pair of ultra sheer hose, the clerk smiled and said to make sure that I did a good job shaving my legs first. I just smiled and said that I always do. No one questions or cares for the most part what you buy. I have a problem with trying on the items that I want. I have done jeans, blouses and shoes. I am still trying to work up the nerve to take dresses into the dressing room. How other ladies here do it, I don't know.

Debra

[suanne]

Hi Kitty.

Way to go. Just keep on going. I can remember when I first started buying girlie things. It seems like picking the proper things that fit is one thing...then waiting in a check out line will make you sweat big time. I try to shop during the week. I do my best to pick a sales person at check out that just wants to check you out and not jabber about what your buying. The best is the new "check yourself out" lines where you do it all with no sales person to deal with. I think shoes are a little harder to buy. A wig is my biggie. Here's the bottom line. We want to dress. If we want to dress, we will find clothes one way or the other. I find that the few minutes of pain (for some of us) in buying womens clothing doesn't come close to the sheer joy of being able to wear the lovely things later.

Suanne

[shea]

It seems that most of girls including myself had similar experience. When I bought a hose for the first time, I would thought that maybe if when saleslady sees me buying a hose, it will felt strange, so I picked something like cheap a toothbrush, with together, she would probably think he picked it up for girlfriend or something. When I go for cashier, the sales lady was looking at the product and looked at me, and gave me bill.

On the next day, I went to same store, thk god, different lady but when I decided to buy a lipstick, I didn't aware of that I picked up a "TESTER". She asked .."This is a TESTER(which means sample, I didn't know what the TESTER, so I struggled for moment) you have to go back and pick up that says not TESTER, " and she was very friendly and smiling back at me, wishing she was my SO,oh well, then I picked up the right one and this time there was a lady that looking for a make-up and she suddenly looked at me few times, I ignored her and went back to cashier and she said, "Did you find it? hun,?" I don't know why some girls do call me honey.... to me...:confused: , anyway, keep it up!!

[psdibe]

I buy many clothes in drab. It gets moe comfortab;e each time i buy something. It is a great feeling shopping. I wa sbuying a pair of flats one day i ask for a size 11 and the sales lady alsed doe she need the width or the lenth.I said I need the size, she then said try these on with heavy socks and they will stretch abit and should fit fine, and you can bring them back if they dont., is there any thing else you need. One day a ourchsed a pair of jean shorts and the sales lady asked do you need a bloosh with the shirts. I said no thanks paid she smiled and I left. I just go in look, if I dont see what I want and just ask, if any one things something no one says anything. Many sales staff are very helpful, some times less so but you should not care. you are paying like any GG so go for it and enjoy each time you shop. it is a great feeling and truly fun.
Hugs
PD

[girltoy]

I've only had one bad experience with a snooty salesperson. I was picking out a nightie and the girl asked if I needed help finding anything, and I commented that I was picking out something for my wife. She asked what my wife liked and I was like "anything ... she just loves getting presents." The girl looked at me and said "I would never ask anyone to pick up a present for me ... especially a guy."

I looked at her, picked out a nightie, smiled and said "Well, I can tell who's sad and lonely around here." and walked off to pay for it. :D

[Simmone]

I am lucky enough that one of my friends, a girl, understands and buys me lingerie for Christmas etc. Now and again, we go shopping and she takes any stuff I buy to the checkout, so I am reasonably safe. This is an incredibly thrilling experience - I am not sure if I would say it is sexy as such although when she finds that special something and shows it to me with a dirty little smile, I often have to surpress an embaracing little lump. I know she wouldn't 'out me' in public or anything but I feel entirely at her mercy and that's nice too - she will lead me by the arm to the undies section and I am obliged not to look too interested in all the lovely stuff. It certainly seems as though people suspect you less when you are with a girl. In fact you even seem to get 'knowing' but friendly smiles from some of the shop girls
This whole arangement is mutually beneficial as it means our boy+girl shopping trips are fun for us both - there is none of that friction that usually goes along with man and women shopping together.

The point is, if you possibly can, get a girl who understands to go with you and it goes from being a dangerous expidition to an exciting adventure. Failing that take pleasure in the anticipation of the parcels landing on the door mat OR having to go to the post office to pick them up KNOWING what's inside!

Either way, have fun!

[jjjjohanne]

I can remember how scared I was on my first hose buying experience. I eventually would target older cashiers. They seemed less silly, and inquisitive. However, after I became comfortable enough to buy just one pack of hose from whatever cashier I came upon, they don't react any differently than the older ladies.

In clothing stores, such as Fashion Bug or DressBarn, expect that these clerks get occasional crossdressers. They will be able to distinguish whether you are one or the other if they get both types of men. However, they won't let on that they know if you don't give them reason. It's kinda like that sticky "are you pregnant?" question. You DON'T want to ask those kinds of questions erroneously!!!