I just got propositioned for sex at lowes............

[Bree-asaurus]

I could tell I was being followed by this guy who walked past me and said I'm very cute and asked for my name. A tiny bit of small talk and he asked for my number and if I had a boyfriend. After being rejected, he asked if I knew anywhere he could get some action. I told him I don't know any people like that. He then told me how pretty I was again and asked if he could have my number again...

W. T. F.

So I'm working on being myself even if I don't pass... and I know tranny chasers are more on the lookout for transexuals/crossdressers, but WTF?!??! Can't I just be left the #$%& alone to live my life?

And he wasn't even hot... :Angry3:

EDIT: I guess I didn't clarify in my post... but when he asked me where he could find some action, and my response to his question clarified that he was asking where he could find some trannies. I wouldn't have posted if I was just getting hit on.

[kendra_gurl]

Oh the price we pay for being beautiful:battingeyelashes::battingeyelashes::batt ingeyelashes:

[Janet Elise]

Be flattered for a half second and move on :)

[Bree-asaurus]

Be flattered that he wanted to have sex to me because he thought I had a penis? I don't think so...

I thought this was the transexual forum... transexuals usually don't like the idea of guys hitting on them because they think we have a penis.

[LeaP]

Bree, I read your story as being hit on because he saw you as a woman, literally that you're cute. Based solely on what you wrote, I don't see the tranny chaser angle, unless you were implying it in the "find some action" part.

[Bree-asaurus]

Bree, I read your story as being hit on because he saw you as a woman, literally that you're cute. Based solely on what you wrote, I don't see the tranny chaser angle, unless you were implying it in the "find some action" part.

The way he was asking about 'finding some action' and how he responded to my response implied that he was looking for trannies.

I didn't convey the whole story word for word, expression for expression. I know exactly what it was... it was the way he was asking about getting some action that revealed his true intentions to me... prior to that I gave him the benefit of the doubt that he was just a creepy old dude... not a creepy old tranny chaser.

I just think it's creepy as hell that guys think they can approach anyone like this, regardless of their attraction or fetish.

I'm just posting this as a story of an experience, not some reach-out for help to boost my self esteem or something. After talking to him, I knew exactly what he was looking for, and it isn't going to change how I feel about myself.

[LeaP]

I'm just posting this as a story of an experience, not some reach-out for help to boost my self esteem or something. After talking to him, I knew exactly what he was looking for, and it isn't going to change how I feel about myself.

I'm sorry, Bree, I didn't intend my response to imply that. And yes, it's beyond creepy.

[kimdl93]

WWell you are very pretty, but that guy was way out of line. I wonder is he generally finds a lot of 'action ' at Lowes?

[Bree-asaurus]

I'm sorry, Bree, I didn't intend my response to imply that. And yes, it's beyond creepy.

It's cool. I'm just not a fan of people trying to boost other's self esteem through half-truths or by walking on eggshells. I prefer the harsh, honest truth :P

[LeaP]

It's cool. I'm just not a fan of people trying to boost other's self esteem through half-truths or by walking on eggshells. I prefer the harsh, honest truth :P

Neither am I - I'm the brutally honest type.

[sierra_g]

WWell you are very pretty, but that guy was way out of line. I wonder is he generally finds a lot of 'action ' at Lowes?

He was at a hardware store, looking for "hardware".

[Bree-asaurus]

He was at a hardware store, looking for "hardware".

Nothing hard here except my head... (and by that I mean my skull you pervs! :D)

[juno]

The problem is that transsexuals have a reputation for being promiscuous. I think that is partly because the average transsexual tries to fit in, and the promiscuous ones stand out. Once transgenderism is socially acceptable enough that nobody feels pressure to go stealth, this sort of thing will be less common. Of course, there will always be men looking for easy sex, but hopefully they won't assume we are fair game.

[KellyJameson]

I always get angry when people assume because you are TG you are easy, smoke comes out my ears and my eyes turn into black glowing embers and my non-violent ways are sorely tested.

The idea that someone can use another persons body without any regard to their feelings makes me crazy even though I know this is normal behavior that has happened since the beginning of time.

In the weird world of men he would consider it a compliment that he wants you for sex evidenced by his telling you that you are pretty, as if that should be enough for you and in my own weird world even though I hate it I also like it when it is done to me.

There is nothing more crazy making than being attracted to the very thing you hate making you question everything you believe in. I think this is one reason I become angry because I become angry at myself and it gets mixed in with the anger I have for the other persons behavior, life is strange and projection sucks

[Lori B]

which Lowes??? what address?? .........:heehee::doh::brolleyes:

[Sara Jessica]

As a dear friend of mine would say, "what part of my being trans would make you think that you can talk to me that way, or that somehow sex is even remotely part of the equation???"

I'd be ticked off too.

[Joann Smith]

But Bree ..you are cute so this will happen ... you might want to invest in some pepper spray..LOL

[TxKimberly]

It makes you wonder WHY they think that people like us are "easy". Very few people would walk up to a random man or woman and say something like that, so why is it that they feel it's acceptable when dealing with us?

[Bree-asaurus]

which Lowes??? what address?? .........:heehee::doh::brolleyes:

PM me your number and the next time someone is looking for some action I'll tell them I have this good friend :P

[ArleneRaquel]

It makes you wonder WHY they think that people like us are "easy". Very few people would walk up to a random man or woman and say something like that, so why is it that they feel it's acceptable when dealing with us?

Kim,
IMO many " outsiders " consider all CD as tramps, ****s, perverts, and treat us as inferiors. The public needs to be educated about our community, which I have found to be, with some glaring exceptions, as kind, tolerant, open minded, and very loving & compassionate in a very Christ like manner. I have to admit that I'm biased but that's what I have found to be true. Hugs to you Kim for all of your great posts, you, your wife, and your entire family are in my thoughts & prayers.

[Lori B]

PM me your number and the next time someone is looking for some action I'll tell them I have this good friend :Plol! thanks Bree!:heehee:

[Bree-asaurus]

But Bree ..you are cute so this will happen ... you might want to invest in some pepper spray..LOL

Yeah, I was having this discussion with my future brother in law.... although he was talking about A mace, not mace... and I was responding with a specific firearm... of which I will not go into details due to the gun rules here.

NO GUN ARGUMENTS!!!!!


It makes you wonder WHY they think that people like us are "easy". Very few people would walk up to a random man or woman and say something like that, so why is it that they feel it's acceptable when dealing with us?

I don't think it's because they think we are easy... but that they have a very particular fetish, of which they do not know how to fulfill. So when they see a transexual or cross dresser, they just go for it.

[Debglam]

Uggh! First Bree, I would assume that you get hit on a lot, cutie!


EDIT: I guess I didn't clarify in my post... but when he asked me where he could find some action, and my response to his question clarified that he was asking where he could find some trannies. I wouldn't have posted if I was just getting hit on.

It sounds like you handled it well though and there ARE a lot of "creepers" out there! I've only had this happen to me a couple of times and I am not full time (and I'm not looking for a hook-up anyway). I guess what baffles me is first that a simple "No thanks" doesn't end it. Second that the "chasers" I've seen are no prize and do they really think that by being crude they are going to be successful?

Hang in there!
Debby

[Bree-asaurus]

Second that the "chasers" I've seen are no prize and do they really think that by being crude they are going to be successful?

Isn't that men in general? :P

I'm so glad I already have a man :D

[ameliabee]

I don't know what's more shocking, that some creepy old chaser had the nerve to bring such up to her in public, or that the initial responses on this forum were that she should be content with such and were envious of youth and beauty.

You have my condolences. I still get shaken up when considerably older men put the moves on me, and nobody's ever brought up the trans business.

[JohnH]

That really would be creepy to me if some man put the make to me! Ugh!

I would tell him in a very masculine Johnny Cash voice I was not interested.

John

[Badtranny]

The problem is that transsexuals have a reputation for being promiscuous..

??????????? Um, I don't see that at all. I actually am promiscuous compared to the way people portray themselves on this site and I've had exactly 4 sexual encounters in 3 years and 2 of them were boyfriend-ish.

The TS women on this site are mostly all in relationships in fact so I don't know where this reputation is coming from.

What's shocking is some asshat followed up a proposition with a question about where he can find some action. My mouth is agape just hearing the story and I think I would probably bust out laughing if some guy asked me that in the middle of Lowe's. I am not even close to being prudish but how in the world does somebody think that is EVER an appropriate question to ask a complete stranger?

I'm sorry that happened to you Bree baby, I hope that creepy jerk doesn't spend too much time in your head. It seems like we always get read when we least expect it.

[Kaitlyn Michele]

Go get em meliissa...

for some reason we are dehumanized sex objects... we really are...i'm not the activist type...i'm not the drama type...it just seems people make this assumption about transsexuals...

the funny part is that in my male dating life, my cd life and my current life...i have actually never met a hornier group of people than the cd guys i hung out with for a couple years..the biggest "chasers" i've ever met were cd's..and lots of em..

[Jessica86]

And he wasn't even hot... :Angry3:



This is the part I don't get. Why are you so upset if you....are interested in guys? It would be the same if a woman asked me for sex just because I'm a cross dresser. I would be flattered, say "umm...no way, I'm married," and walk off. I don't get why you are so offended if you know what hot or not is when looking at men.....

[Badtranny]

This is the part I don't get. Why are you so upset if you....are interested in guys? It would be the same if a woman asked me for sex just because I'm a cross dresser. I would be flattered, say "umm...no way, I'm married," and walk off. I don't get why you are so offended if you know what hot or not is when looking at men.....

OMG are you serious? It's no big deal when a creeper comes on to you, or asks you out, or even stalks you in the aisles. It happens when you're hot. (can I get a wha wha?) ;-)

The POINT here is when she politely declined the dudes advance, he then said "oh, well do you know where I can find some action?" She was joking when she said he wasn't even hot. If George fricken Clooney asked me if I knew where he could find some tranny action I would be offended. Geez George, what do I look like, a pimp?

She's upset because:

1. She was read as a tranny while she was doing mundane errands. (totally not expecting it)
2. The dude made a crude come on, and when rebuffed asked where an available tranny was. Like he was expecting to bang her in the parking lot.

I don't know anyone that wouldn't have had their day tarnished by that.

Just like I used to tell my goofy straight friends before I came out as trans; Just because I like men, doesn't mean I like ALL men.

[Anna Lorree]

Wow, I don't care if a person is gay or straight, trans-anything or cisgender, male or female, you don't just ask a stranger for sex. I mean really??? Yuck...

Anna

[Noemi]

Sorry you had to deal with a creep Bree. Must have pulled you right out of your day.
Do not allow some ones lower thoughts to effect you, forget him.
Should have gone to Home Depot.LOL!

[Amber99]

Dang, that would scare me.

[Jennifer Marie P.]

It happen to me a few times theres a creep everywhere you go the price to pay for being a beautiful woman.

[Silentpartner GG SO]

Wow, I don't care if a person is gay or straight, trans-anything or cisgender, male or female, you don't just ask a stranger for sex. I mean really??? Yuck...

Anna

My sentiments exactly - the guy needed a good kick in the nuts - that might have cooled his ardour! I'm pretty sure that sort of soliciting for sex is illegal in the UK -

I certainly wouldnt be flattered in any way - insulted more like - dirty old sod - yukk!

[Jessica86]

OMG are you serious? It's no big deal when a creeper comes on to you, or asks you out, or even stalks you in the aisles. It happens when you're hot. (can I get a wha wha?) ;-)

The POINT here is when she politely declined the dudes advance, he then said "oh, well do you know where I can find some action?" She was joking when she said he wasn't even hot. If George fricken Clooney asked me if I knew where he could find some tranny action I would be offended. Geez George, what do I look like, a pimp?

She's upset because:

1. She was read as a tranny while she was doing mundane errands. (totally not expecting it)
2. The dude made a crude come on, and when rebuffed asked where an available tranny was. Like he was expecting to bang her in the parking lot.

I don't know anyone that wouldn't have had their day tarnished by that.

Just like I used to tell my goofy straight friends before I came out as trans; Just because I like men, doesn't mean I like ALL men.

Not trying to argue here, but everything you said reminds me of a guy hitting on a girl in a bar. "You wanna go somewhere?" "No, leave me alone." "Well, you have any friends who might want to?" Happens all the time. I've even done that one, and have been introduced to their friends like that before. Also, if you think about it, some GGs do some of the same thing (as most will deny it...but any man in uniform will know otherwise.) It happens all of the time if you are in the military, firefighter, or anything of that nature in a bar for example. "Know where I can find some action?" I can't tell you how many times I've been asked that while in my uniform by women. Then, they proceed to just follow you and keep asking you things. Did it bug me? NO. Why? How would anyone meet someone if you aren't persistent? If anything, it made me feel good. My wife turned me down the first time I met her. Then, when out later, I asked again while with other friends. She agreed and here we are. As far as the proposed "sex" goes, I've been propositioned sex at work by GUYS who I come in contact with also. They have also been persistent....but part of the job....you come across people like that. Just turn them down and move on. Not everyone is going to come up to you, kiss your hand, hand you a flower, and speak French to you. Reality is people like this exists. Is it wrong? Don't know. Some people look for people like that. If we think he's wrong for doing something out of the ordinary...then we became part of the group that hates us in my opinion. If I was in her shoes, I would just keep in mind a lot of guys are visual creatures and very blunt. Women are more passionate and subtle. This is going to happen a lot. Ask any woman. They know someone who has been propositioned for SOMETHING. Just move on and find the right guy who treats you right no matter what.

[kimdl93]

.... This is going to happen a lot. Ask any woman. They know someone who has been propositioned for SOMETHING. Just move on and find the right guy who treats you right no matter what.

It was a Lowes, not a bar. But honestly, any person who walks up and out of the blue, asks for sex...states they are looking for action...well, its beyond blunt or to the point...its crude, tasteless and wrong.

[christinac]

I don't think it's because they think we are easy... but that they have a very particular fetish, of which they do not know how to fulfill. So when they see a transexual or cross dresser, they just go for it.

There are some fetish web sites out there now that will turn your stomach and make to vomit until you turn inside out. My block got turned off a while back and I ran a search and eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww !! I don't even know how to put it into words how disgusting it was. I wish you could shut sites like that down because they give us a bad reputation and personally I they put all of us in danger.

I'm glad you handled it well because I think I would have lost it the second time around. I'm not normally a very violent person, but I think I would have done to him like my dad used to say "let me pound some sense into you".

[Bree-asaurus]

Not trying to argue here, but everything you said reminds me of a guy hitting on a girl in a bar. "You wanna go somewhere?" "No, leave me alone." "Well, you have any friends who might want to?" Happens all the time. I've even done that one, and have been introduced to their friends like that before. Also, if you think about it, some GGs do some of the same thing (as most will deny it...but any man in uniform will know otherwise.) It happens all of the time if you are in the military, firefighter, or anything of that nature in a bar for example. "Know where I can find some action?" I can't tell you how many times I've been asked that while in my uniform by women. Then, they proceed to just follow you and keep asking you things. Did it bug me? NO. Why? How would anyone meet someone if you aren't persistent? If anything, it made me feel good. My wife turned me down the first time I met her. Then, when out later, I asked again while with other friends. She agreed and here we are. As far as the proposed "sex" goes, I've been propositioned sex at work by GUYS who I come in contact with also. They have also been persistent....but part of the job....you come across people like that. Just turn them down and move on. Not everyone is going to come up to you, kiss your hand, hand you a flower, and speak French to you. Reality is people like this exists. Is it wrong? Don't know. Some people look for people like that. If we think he's wrong for doing something out of the ordinary...then we became part of the group that hates us in my opinion. If I was in her shoes, I would just keep in mind a lot of guys are visual creatures and very blunt. Women are more passionate and subtle. This is going to happen a lot. Ask any woman. They know someone who has been propositioned for SOMETHING. Just move on and find the right guy who treats you right no matter what.

You simply do not understand. You're arguing this whole thing about why it's okay for him to be creepy when being creepy wasn't the root of the issue.

He wasn't hitting on me because I was a girl, he was hitting on me because he thought I had a penis and wanted to have sex with me and my penis. He could have been super polite about it, but the fact would remain that he found me attractive and wanted to have sex with me BECAUSE HE THINKS I HAVE A PENIS. In case you haven't noticed, MTF transexuals generally HATE their penis and do not identify as male... and complimenting the very thing they hate isn't all that flattering and actually makes us feel like crap.

Did you care to notice that it was only cross dressers that responded wondered what the big deal is, while the transexuals that responded knew exactly why this bothered me? Because you are not transexual, you cannot understand why this would bother a transsexual.

...

For the record, the comment on cross dressers vs transexuals: I didn't say ALL the cross dressers that responded didn't understand... many of you can understand why this would bother a transexual and I thank you all for your responses.

[Jessica86]

1.You simply do not understand. You're arguing this whole thing about why it's okay for him to be creepy when being creepy wasn't the root of the issue.

2.He wasn't hitting on me because I was a girl, he was hitting on me because he thought I had a penis and wanted to have sex with me and my penis. He could have been super polite about it, but the fact would remain that he found me attractive and wanted to have sex with me BECAUSE HE THINKS I HAVE A PENIS. In case you haven't noticed, MTF transexuals generally HATE their penis and do not identify as male... and complimenting the very thing they hate isn't all that flattering and actually makes us feel like crap.

3.Did you care to notice that it was only cross dressers that responded wondered what the big deal is, while the transexuals that responded knew exactly why this bothered me?

4.Because you are not transexual, you cannot understand why this would bother a transsexual..

1. I never said it was ok.
2. You never mentioned the guy wanting to go out with you just because you have a penis like you say. I guarantee you he did not walk up to you, say "Hi tranny. Wanna go out? Oh ok. Got any other trannies I can go screw?" It doesn't happen like that.
3. I knew this was coming. I'm not going to talk that versus stuff about who is better. I don't care and neither should you.
4. I guess so. My wife is sitting here reading this with me wondering why this is a big deal. Even she says "That's happened to me. What's the big deal?"

Bottom line is it happened, it's done with, and it will happen to you again. Why be upset? Why did you transition if you didn't want to think, feel, and act like a woman does? This includes dealing with situations like this.

[Badtranny]

I guess so. My wife is sitting here reading this with me wondering why this is a big deal. Even she says "That's happened to me. What's the big deal?" .

Jess,

This has nothing to do with Creepy Creeperton coming on to her. It has nothing to do with how crude he was. This is all about being treated like a tranny freak. Let's run through the dialogue.

Dude: Hey you're damn cute

Bree: Thanks that's very sweet of you

Dude: What's your name? I'm Creepy Creeperton (names have been assumed)

Bree: I'm Bree, thanks for the compliment, but I really need to get going

Dude: Well hang on a minute, do you have a boyfriend? maybe we could go out or something

Bree: No I'm sorry, I do have a boyfriend but thank you

Dude: Oh well do you know where I can find some action with a girl like you?

Bree: Um, no I'm sorry but that's rude and I have to go.

It was all very normal-ish UNTIL he asked for "some action", this ain't a bar Jess, it's a hardware store, and further he intimated that since she was apparently a TG female than she would be ready for said "action" or know somebody who would. Ask your wife if she would be offended by a man asking for action in the hardware store and then asking if she had any friends that would be up for it. Do you really think your wife has any friends that she could tell this guy to call? I hardly think she does. What if he noticed that she was wearing a sorority ring that was reputed to be "easy"? Would that change anything? "Hey I see you were a Delta Pie, wanna hook up? No? Well do you have any friends you can call for me?

This is the problem. He noticed she was TG and then automatically assumed it was boom boom time. Not a nice interaction to have when you are shopping for window sealant.

[Silentpartner GG SO]

Jessica I think you might be missing the point that Bree is making - I'm guessing Bree is quite happy to feel, act and think like a woman does but a GG wouldnt have a penis to start with so the chances of a guy hitting on a GG because she has a penis are zero!

The guy hitting on Bree was seemingly interested in her primarily because she (Bree) has a penis - which is not flattering at all to a person who acts, feels and thinks like as female.

I'm a genetic female and I'd be well pi**ed off if I thought a guy was hitting on me because he thought I had a penis!

Yes GG's have to put up with getting propositions for sex on a regular basis but normally because they have a vagina -

Edit: Melissa you were obviously writing your post at the same time as mine - very well put! :)

[Kaitlyn Michele]

Jessica I think you might be missing the point that Bree is making - I'm guessing Bree is quite happy to feel, act and think like a woman does but a GG wouldnt have a penis to start with so the chances of a guy hitting on a GG because she has a penis are zero!

The guy hitting on Bree was seemingly interested in her primarily because she (Bree) has a penis - which is not flattering at all to a person who acts, feels and thinks like as female.



Exactly...

My home was recently appraised and a man came to my house...he was there for 20 minutes and then asked me sign forms...they were in a male name!! So i was forced to show him my papers....he said Ok..."like chaz bono"... i said not exactly, no..but then he said to me..."do you date?"...

now i can take that a couple of ways..but i was there , i know it was OMG, a trannie, i wonder if she has a P$S, I wonder if she'll B**W me?...the instinctive presumption of ts leading on to sex

ts and sex could not have less to do with each other...and that's regardless of she male porn, culture, autogynephilia, growing up straight or whatever...sex is around us (like everything) but it has nothing to do with being transsexual

we are constantly sexualized in movies and tv...how many more times do i have to see a shot of a high heel, shaved legs, lips getting painted, nails getting done, shimmy into that skirt and OMG...ITS A DUDE!!! and often that dude is not just a lady, but a creep or murderer...even transamerica is guilty of obsessing over the transformation part of it..

its just something we are saddled with...its a way to dehumanize us and unfortunately because identity is impossible to internally comprehend for cisgendered people without considerable time and thought, the default is to sex...
and frankly there are ALOT OF GAY REPRESSED GUYS that love "trannies"..add to this equation all the GAY REPRESSED crossdressers are out there (who hit on us the most), and you've got a tough boat for those of us that just want to be women for better or worse..

there is nothing inherently wrong with being propositioned, even if the reason is your being transgendered...its more the constant dehumanizing drumbeat of this aspect of our lives

Bree's example and some of the comments here are a reminder of this.

[Inna]

Hi Bree, I am sorry I haven't read into every response, but I felt the same way when men were very forward with their advances. I have experienced such knowing that these man weren't aware of my transsexuality and thought I am just another woman, one would think that this would be flattering (only testosterone driven brains would think that) but sense of my persona and comfort zone was violated. I felt as though an object they can fondle at their will, extremely unpleasant feeling, and my heart goes to all the GGs who had to put up with such actions. Not to say that all the man were acting this way, absolutely not, but some were very unpleasant and looking for raw physical satisfaction of them selves without respect towards my person and my feelings.

[Julia_in_Pa]

If it were me I would have lured him into a dark place.
It would be on the news of his disappearance a few days later.

Your very beautiful Bree you should be happy about the proposition but prepared to remove him if he became belligerent.


Julia

[ReineD]

And he wasn't even hot...

Most of them aren't :p

... not that I want to broad-brush, so I'll specify that I didn't think any of the admirers I've seen were hot.

I don't blame you for feeling insulted. :hugs:


Oh the price we pay for being beautiful:battingeyelashes::battingeyelashes::batt ingeyelashes:

It's not about being beautiful. It's about being chased specifically for what's between the legs. This might be flattering for some CDers who are into this sort of thing, but not transwomen.

Also, GGs aren't exempt from this either. I once went to a cabinet maker for shelving for our home office. I saw him a few times going over the plans, and then he came right out and said, "I want to do you". His wife had just had a baby. Totally inappropriate.



In the weird world of men he would consider it a compliment that he wants you for sex evidenced by his telling you that you are pretty, as if that should be enough for you and in my own weird world even though I hate it I also like it when it is done to me.

This is an interesting observation, I'm glad you brought it up. Removing the creep factor with lewd comments in inappropriate places, it is true that most of us feel flattered when others find us attractive and want us. It is, after all, the beginning of most romantic relationships. But, if the only basis for the attraction is physical, the relationship or the sex quickly becomes empty.

How many (younger?) GGs get all dolled up, go to clubs, and have one-night-stands one after the other, believing their partner might be "the one". But the glue that keeps partners interested, the chemistry that has so much more to do than just physical appearance, isn't there.

Personally, if I feel the only basis for a man's attraction to me are my looks or a perceived availability, it's a major turn-off. It's an indication that he doesn't want me, he just wants sex. He could have that with anyone. :p

[LeaP]

If it were me I would have lured him into a dark place.
It would be on the news of his disappearance a few days later.

Your very beautiful Bree you should be happy about the proposition but prepared to remove him if he became belligerent.


You're always so ... personal With your vengeance, Julia.

In this case, the easiest thing to do would, at the point where the creep asked about finding some action, point to the biggest, ugliest, hairiest contractor in the place and say,

"See that guy? He just told me he's looking for some action in the men's room. Why don't you go ask him to meet you there?"

And then stand back and watch the fireworks.

[Marleena]

Sorry you had to deal with that POS Bree.

Nothing else to add.

[christinac]

In this case, the easiest thing to do would, at the point where the creep asked about finding some action, point to the biggest, ugliest, hairiest contractor in the place and say,

"See that guy? He just told me he's looking for some action in the men's room. Why don't you go ask him to meet you there?"

And then stand back and watch the fireworks.

ROFL!! That is E evil!!:) :)

Seriously if the creep wanted "action" he should join that so called "Cruise Line" with the rest of the wackos!!

[RADER]

Maybe the next time this happens, tell him what he is looking for is over in isle 7
I am glad it happened it a public place, can you imagine it being in a dark ally or
a deserted street.
Rader

[sandra-leigh]

With regards to why people might think we are promiscuous: "observational bias". Consider, for example, what shows up in the backs of "adult" magazines, or in the "personals" section of any local-events tabloid: pages and pages of advertisements for "she-males". And the people who hang around dating sites, what they see when they notice anything from transsexuals is the "tranny looking for action" ads. What they do not notice is the "woman enjoys long walks in the rain, movies, coffee, and small dogs" ads are posted by transsexuals who are just going about their lives.

This is similar to the drag queens in full gear getting Noticed when they are outside of the LGBT clubs. And when I walk around town, or bus around, just going about my errands, I fade into the background -- not that plenty of people don't think "male", but even in a skirt or dress, I'm about as interesting as listening to someone describing a long walk in the rain.

The promiscuous TS-associated get the attention, and the banality of the rest of us doesn't get thought about, leaving behind just the impression that we are all into it for the sexual opportunities...

[christinac]

I am glad it happened it a public place, can you imagine it being in a dark ally or
a deserted street.
Rader

I was just thinking that same thing. If that creep was so brazen to do that in the open in a public place like that, what would have happened had this took place in a park or nature walk or some place like that?

[Bree-asaurus]

1. I never said it was ok.
2. You never mentioned the guy wanting to go out with you just because you have a penis like you say. I guarantee you he did not walk up to you, say "Hi tranny. Wanna go out? Oh ok. Got any other trannies I can go screw?" It doesn't happen like that.
3. I knew this was coming. I'm not going to talk that versus stuff about who is better. I don't care and neither should you.
4. I guess so. My wife is sitting here reading this with me wondering why this is a big deal. Even she says "That's happened to me. What's the big deal?"

Bottom line is it happened, it's done with, and it will happen to you again. Why be upset? Why did you transition if you didn't want to think, feel, and act like a woman does? This includes dealing with situations like this.

2. You want to re-read my original post, because I made an edit in there very early on that he indeed did want to screw me because he thought I had a penis. And this was WELL before you posted.

3. It isn't about who is better. All too often that's what people think... It's just DIFFERENT. I hate my penis. You like yours. I can't understand why you like yours and you can't understand why I hate mine. If you think I'm saying I'm better than you, you have some other issues because that is FAR from the case.

4. If he was asking her for sex because he thought she had a penis, I'm sure she would be bothered by it. Even still, she doesn't know how it would feel either because she is not transexual either, so she still wouldn't understand the kind of hurt it causes a transexual.

Bottom line? Pff.... having men want to have tranny sex with you isn't part of being a woman. If he just wanted to have sex with me because he thought I was hot, that's fine... flattered, creeped out, whatever, move along. That wasn't the case.

...

BUT THANK YOU to Badtranny (who did a good job of providing an example situation), Silentpartner, Kailtyn, Inna, Julia, Reine, Lea, Marleena and the other transsexuals, cross dressers and genetic females (none being better than another as Jessica may think) who actually seeing what the real problem is here... :D

[kellycan27]

Just a thought... Once we start labeling people as weirdos, creeps or perverts just because they enjoy different things.. we're no better than those who label us because we are different than they are. His approach was def inappropriate, but I don't see someone who's sexual proclivities are different than say...mine as some kind of a creep.

[Aprilrain]

Just a thought... Once we start labeling people as weirdos, creeps or perverts just because they enjoy different things.. we're no better than those who label us because we are different than they are. His approach was def inappropriate, but I don't see someone who's sexual proclivities are different than say...mine as some kind of a creep.

yeah but thats because you're a perv:heehee:

[Bree-asaurus]

Just a thought... Once we start labeling people as weirdos, creeps or perverts just because they enjoy different things.. we're no better than those who label us because we are different than they are. His approach was def inappropriate, but I don't see someone who's sexual proclivities are different than say...mine as some kind of a creep.

I was actually talking to my BF about this earlier... it doesn't bother me that HE is into that kind of thing... but the fact that he was creepy in the way he went about it and the way it made me feel... that he had to bring it to my attention that he thought I was a tranny and that he wanted to rock our with our cocks out. I don't want to be reminded I'm a tranny, and I don't want to be told that someone thinks I'm hot because I'm a tranny.

The fact that he is a tranny chaser isn't creepy... the fact that he is creepy is what makes him creepy :P

[Alice B]

A dirtbag is a dirtbag, even though it was a compliment for you in an off-handed way.

[Bree-asaurus]

A dirtbag is a dirtbag, even though it was a compliment for you in an off-handed way.

I was a little flattered, albeit creeped out, at first... but once I knew his attraction to me was because he thought I'm a tranny, any kind of compliment I could take away from the situation went out the window. If he would have taken my initial rejection and left it at that, I would have thought that he simply thought I was a cute girl and it would have made me feel good (and a little scared :P)... but noooo..... :P

[Lori B]

I was a little flattered, albeit creeped out, at first... but once I knew his attraction to me was because he thought I'm a tranny, any kind of compliment I could take away from the situation went out the window. If he would have taken my initial rejection and left it at that, I would have thought that he simply thought I was a cute girl and it would have made me feel good (and a little scared :P)... but noooo..... :PBree............don`t forget my #:pNVUGCdTVpug&feature=related

[Debglam]

Ok, I should have thought of this sooner but:

You get propositioned for sex at Lowes and I can't even get someone to show me where the lightbulbs are! :heehee:

Thank you, thank you very much. Next show will be at 7!

[Bree-asaurus]

Ok, I should have thought of this sooner but:

You get propositioned for sex at Lowes and I can't even get someone to show me where the lightbulbs are! :heehee:

Thank you, thank you very much. Next show will be at 7!

Lucky for me a customer took over where the employees failed :P

Or something like that....

...

yeah...

[ReineD]

... it doesn't bother me that HE is into that kind of thing... but the fact that he was creepy in the way he went about it and the way it made me feel... that he had to bring it to my attention that he thought I was a tranny and that he wanted to rock our with our cocks out. I don't want to be reminded I'm a tranny, and I don't want to be told that someone thinks I'm hot because I'm a tranny.

Not to mention the biggest insult of all: his very question assumes that all transgendered individuals are the same and further, they are all willing to put themselves out for sex. "OK, if you're not into it right now, that's cool, but I KNOW you're one of them, so can you tell me where the rest of the action is?" Ick.

He embodies the beliefs that are rampant, even though seldom spoken out loud, among many cisgenders even if they are not creeps like this guy. He represents the uphill battle that all people whose genders are not congruent with their birth sex face, every single day of their lives.

And THAT is what upset you. :sad:

[Chloe Renee]

I am sorry that this happened to you it really puts a damoer on the day. I had this happen to me today in my garage, I was acleaning and preparing for a garage sale this weekend. An (ahem) "gentlemen" saw me in the garage and was asking questions about a canoe I had a for sale sign on. After a few minutes "I m completely straight, your gay I assume. You have really pretty eyes< do you wanna play?"
WTF??
Get out of here, my partner and Idon't play with others.

I am not flattered, or amused by the situation I am pissed about the situation. And I echo the thoughts in your first post.

[christinac]

Chloe Renee, I don't think I would have handled that very well either if someone did that to me. There is often a very fine line between a flirt and straight out disrespect and that crosses by miles especially when it is being done to you in your very own garage.

[Bree-asaurus]

Not to mention the biggest insult of all: his very question assumes that all transgendered individuals are the same and further, they are all willing to put themselves out for sex. "OK, if you're not into it right now, that's cool, but I KNOW you're one of them, so can you tell me where the rest of the action is?" Ick.

He embodies the beliefs that are rampant, even though seldom spoken out loud, among many cisgenders even if they are not creeps like this guy. He represents the uphill battle that all people whose genders are not congruent with their birth sex face, every single day of their lives.

And THAT is what upset you. :sad:

Yup... because us men in dresses are all about the promiscuous sex and being used and thrown aside...

One day all of us CDs, TSs and TGs will be able to live their lives without this kind of stereotyping. I'm just glad our society is slowly getting better and the younger generations (one of which I am a part of) won't have to deal with this kind of crap.

[christinac]

Yup... because us men in dresses are all about the promiscuous sex and being used and thrown aside...

One day all of us CDs, TSs and TGs will be able to live their lives without this kind of stereotyping. I'm just glad our society is slowly getting better and the younger generations (one of which I am a part of) won't have to deal with this kind of crap.

I wish it wasn't so slow coming around though.

[Bree-asaurus]

I wish it wasn't so slow coming around though.

Progress is the slowest thing in the world :/

[christinac]

Progress is the slowest thing in the world :/

True! So very true! Then on top of that it seems here lately that for every step forward we make something seems to kick us three steps backwards.

[Chloe Renee]

I think we are at least getting two steps forward before the kicking starts. With the DSMV and EEOC..
But things almost need to boil over before things get better.

[christinac]

I don't know some of the kicks lately have been totally brutal.

[MarcyRex]

Thank you ladies. I learned a bit of perspective today and it didn't cost me anything.

[Bree-asaurus]

Thank you ladies. I learned a bit of perspective today and it didn't cost me anything.

Please, do tell. I'd be interested to hear where you're coming from and what you learned :)

[christinac]

Please, do tell. I'd be interested to hear where you're coming from and what you learned :)

I would too because we all see things from different perspectives at times and you may be seeing one that I have over looked or haven't ever seen before.

[Kaitlyn Michele]

I think we are at least getting two steps forward before the kicking starts. With the DSMV and EEOC..
But things almost need to boil over before things get better.
The legal and political world are slowly accepting that we exist and are productive members of society...

Unfortunately , hearts and minds are way further behind... We are marginalized as much as and group of people on the planet

[Starling]

I've only been accosted once by a guy with sufficiently bad impulse control, and it definitely wasn't because I'm young and pretty. (I cut a matronly figure and dress inconspicuously.) Fortunately, my reflexive response was, "I don't have time for this." I say fortunately, because I am generally a soft touch, and if I'd engaged this poor sap in a conversation, I'd surely have have wound up completely disgusted.

I didn't feel threatened, as I was standing on the front steps of the local GLBT Center. I've noticed a lot of shy male dogwalkers loitering around my therapist's home office, too. It's a funny feeling for me, having been an invisible male for so long, to be even the occasional object of such obvious voyeurism.

But there is something fascinating to people about "sex-changing," which is why people "like us" (but not at all like us) so often appear in the sensational media. I don't blame people for their fascination, because they didn't ask for it, but it doesn't make me any more comfortable to know that I push some men's hot button.

:) Lallie

[whowhatwhen]

Lowes has to be the LEAST sexy hardware store in existence, RONA on the other hand... :daydreaming:

That must've sucked big time though, but I'll +1 the good thing being that you were in a public place.
If he's that into dick why not just go to craigslist? It's 99% dicks and used lawn furniture.

I'm going to guess that he considers himself totally "100% straight" too.
:heehee:

[ReineD]

I've just deleted the last eight posts by members responding to a member who disbelieves Bree's assessment of her own situation. This is not a thread about whether Bree read her own situation wrong or not, it is about people who assume that all transpersons must be into this for sexual reasons.

If any members still doubt Bree's own assessment of what happened, please contact Bree directly via PM. The validity of Bree's assessment was discussed on page two and we don't need to be going over this ad nauseam.

[SandraAbsent]

Sadly I've had this same thing happen to me at a grocery store about two months ago. He followed me around the store the entire time. When I tried to blow him off, he drove up next to me in the parking lot and said he "wanted to get with me." Great proposition me in a parking lot, in the rain, while I'm unloading my grocery cart. F---ing A--holes.

[Debb]

Bree, et al: I've found this an instructive post & conversation. Many of us are not empathetic enough to be able to put ourselves in someone else' position, and it helps us to step outside of our own little worlds when we can read, and see, how the actions of a creep are offensive.

I am right there with you, girl. It's depressing, enraging, and depressing all over again when we are shown just how far we have left to go.

[christinac]

If he's that into dick why not just go to craigslist? It's 99% dicks and used lawn furniture

You hit that square on the nail head!! He also could have signed up on the "cruise line".

*little side note: If you haven't tried the "cruise line" yet, don't waste your time.

[Babeba]

I've been inappropriately propositioned at a store before... It was pretty much the same as what happened to you, Bree, with the obvious exception that he was more of a garden variety creep looking for a GG so it wasn't as difficult to deal with. Trust me when I say I have both sympathy and empathy for you and I hope it never happens again! I had been visiting my parents last minute-y when I was sort of moved out, assumed I had lots of clothes left there still only to find out I had a weird assortment. I just grabbed a couple random things and ran out to the store first thing before my shower. I felt like I looked like unwashed crap but I figured, 'what the hell, it's just Walmart.' I think there is just a variety of creep (this guy and that chaser included) who figure that the sort of person who looks like they have a self esteem/body issue problem they are more likely to 'be flattered' and agree to cheap, throwaway sex. It's not flattering. It's what they want you to think to manipulate you so they can use you like a prostitute without paying.

One thing that bothers me in this thread is the idea that if he hadn't been so obvious about looking for tranny sex, or had been hot, the whole thing would have been flattery. I think that some of the MEN on this thread need to trust all the WOMEN when they say an experience they themselves had was creepy!!

[Badtranny]

One thing that bothers me in this thread is the idea that if he hadn't been so obvious about looking for tranny sex, or had been hot, the whole thing would have been flattery. I think that some of the MEN on this thread need to trust all the WOMEN when they say an experience they themselves had was creepy!!

Oh, c'mon! You should have been flattered. Somebody not only found you attractive, but he also wanted to use you as a receptacle. Think about it, this guy could just be doing it himself, but he would RATHER do it with you. You should at least feel a little grateful instead of soooo entitled. Sheeesh women these days.

[Marleena]

I've been inappropriately propositioned at a store before... It was pretty much the same as what happened to you, Bree, with the obvious exception that he was more of a garden variety creep looking for a GG so it wasn't as difficult to deal with.

I would have replied in the same manner to your encounter.:)

Any guy that acts in this manner is a P.O.S. It is totally disrespectful.

[Bree-asaurus]

Yeah when guys are super creepy like that it just makes me wonder... Has this approach EVER worked for you?

But I guess when a guy stoops that low, it's because they can't get any action... anywhere...

[christinac]

The thing that really bothers me about the situation, actually scares the living hell out of me, is the question: If he can stoop that low, where does he stop!?! What is he capable of if he was to decide not to take NO for an answer?

[ReineD]

If he can stoop that low, where does he stop!?!

Well, a male friend who is from a state that I won't mention (I don't want to be disparaging toward a particular region), once told me, "In [state name], men are men and sheep are scared." LOL

[whowhatwhen]

Oh, c'mon! You should have been flattered. Somebody not only found you attractive, but he also wanted to use you as a receptacle. Think about it, this guy could just be doing it himself, but he would RATHER do it with you. You should at least feel a little grateful instead of soooo entitled. Sheeesh women these days.

That being posted anywhere else would have men's rights activists un-ironically agreeing with you.

[Babeba]

The thing that really bothers me about the situation, actually scares the living hell out of me, is the question: If he can stoop that low, where does he stop!?! What is he capable of if he was to decide not to take NO for an answer?

Thusly you see the reason many women are prudent about avoiding the sort of place no one can hear you scream (or would care to come be a witness).

I can definitely see better things to do with my day than be used as a *** dumpster.

[Kaitlyn Michele]

That being posted anywhere else would have men's rights activists un-ironically agreeing with you.

or by many people here.................

[christinac]

"In [state name], men are men and sheep are scared."

ROFL!! I haven't heard that one in years!! I have an idea where your friend is from.:)

Babeba, I know what you mean. I used to take a lot for granted when it came to personal safety, but after a TG friend of mine was attacked and nearly killed in a park, that was in a "good side" of town where there was rarely ever any crime, I am much more cautious now.

[Sally24]

Believe me Bree, guys like this come in all flavors. When I had a run in with a guy getting uncomfortably close to where I was at a picnic area I headed home. When I saw my wife and daughter I said "guys can he creepy"! Their instant response, "Well, yeahhhhhh."

[pickles]

I think the appropriate response would have been a slap.

[christinac]

I think the appropriate response would have been a slap.

Or good old fashioned swift fifty yard field goal winning kick in the _________!!

[whowhatwhen]

Really?
I would've thought escalating the situation would make things even worse, instead of going home rejected now he's waiting in the parking lot...

[christinac]

Really?
I would've thought escalating the situation would make things even worse, instead of going home rejected now he's waiting in the parking lot...

That is one of several possibilities one must consider. But there is also nothing to say that he wouldn't have been waiting in the parking lot anyway because some guys just don't handle rejection very well at all.

I was just cracking a joke on Pickles comment. Not trying to start an argument.

In all seriousness, Bree's situations was not good to start with and thankfully it didn't, but it could have gotten a heck of a lot worse. If A guy is able to stoop that low, where does he stop? What would have happened in this case if it was an encounter in a park or on a nature trail instead of inside Lowes?