More and More publicity is good news

[michelleinktown]

First off Happy Mothers Day to all you Moms out there.

So I've been thinking, oh oh,

With all the recent publicity that is starting to come up about people who are going to transition (Tom Gabel) or have already transitioned the Miss Universe competition Jenna Talackova who is born a male, Dancing With the Stars Chers son Chaz and all of us saying screw this and coming out to the public, I believe there is some momentum starting in our struggle to be accepted and welcomed into society as normal people and not something that is scary. We are slowly educating people one by one and our brothers and sisters that will follow in our footsteps in the future will be better off for what we are doing now. I encourage all of you that if we are given the opportunity to educate and talk to people about who we really are and what we are about please share with them.


That's all


Happy Moms Day once again


Love you all


Michelle

[Traci Elizabeth]

I encourage all of you that if we are given the opportunity to educate and talk to people about who we really are and what we are about please share with them.



NO WAY! Not in a million years am I going to be a public spokeswoman for Transsexuals! I am a WOMAN! My transition is OVER and the last thing I want anyone to know is that at one time in my life, I was cursed trying to live my life as a man! For the life of me, I can't even comprehend that. All of our goals are to be simply a WOMAN. Not a guy, not a Transsexual, not a trans-woman - just a woman. So why on earth would you want society to know that you are a transsexual. Now if you truly feel you are NOT a woman but only a transsexual then by all means scream it out to the world and beyond.

[pamela_a]

NO WAY! Not in a million years am I going to be a public spokeswoman for Transsexuals! I am a WOMAN! My transition is OVER and the last thing I want anyone to know is that at one time in my life, I was cursed trying to live my life as a man! For the life of me, I can't even comprehend that. All of our goals are to be simply a WOMAN. Not a guy, not a Transsexual, not a trans-woman - just a woman. So why on earth would you want society to know that you are a transsexual. Now if you truly feel you are NOT a woman but only a transsexual then by all means scream it out to the world and beyond.

I completely agree Traci. Any support I provide will be as a WOMAN and nothing more

[RADER]

I believe Michelle is trying to say that these celebrities have open a crack in the door to
transition people in any degree of transformation. Werther it is a full transiting or just a weekend
cross dresser. That they are not going to hurt anyone. Society has put a damper on people
who wear the opposite gender clothes; Like they cray some deadly disease.
To those of you that went all the way through the transiting, I say Good For You.
You deserve to be treated with all the respect any one get, and extra from this forum.
Rader

[christinac]

I can see both Michelle's and Traci's point of view here. I think more education is needed, but not everyone is capable of being the educator. If a person is able and willing to give up their personal privacy and leave them self wide open to every possible attack there is and willing to accept that risk, then they are qualified to be an educator and let them have at it if that is their calling. To be honest, I doubt seriously if I could do that. I'm not a very out going type person and I don't handle large crowds very well.

[michelleinktown]

NO WAY! Not in a million years am I going to be a public spokeswoman for Transsexuals! I am a WOMAN! My transition is OVER and the last thing I want anyone to know is that at one time in my life, I was cursed trying to live my life as a man! For the life of me, I can't even comprehend that. All of our goals are to be simply a WOMAN. Not a guy, not a Transsexual, not a trans-woman - just a woman. So why on earth would you want society to know that you are a transsexual. Now if you truly feel you are NOT a woman but only a transsexual then by all means scream it out to the world and beyond.

Not my intention to say that we should be a spokes people for transexuals or transgendered but I believe that most people don't understand us at all and before we become a woman we have to transition and I am more than willing to talk to people about this in order to educate them so that they get it right and not talk about something they know nothing about. I am transitioning and I get stared at, commented at, and if more people are willing to come out in the open and explain what this exactly what this is all about I think that only good could come of it. Once I have transitioned and I am 100% woman that label no longer needs to be with me and i will probably never talk about it again, bury that along with anything else from my past that I don't want to take with me. We seem to all want to be in a steath mode and that is why there are so many broken families and friendships. I think that by more people knowing that we are "normal" there wouldn't be this great fear for people to come out and be who they are. You say it yourself "cursed" really? because that is what we are all made to believe. I don't like what I am right now, but I am lucky enough to know what it was like to be in their shoes and have a greater understanding of both sexes. In one of my post I did already comment about what does a woman feel like??? I feel like me. I am an individual, like everybody else in this world.
What does that say above your avatar. What greater courage could a human do than what we are doing right now? I was in Afghanistan and this is taking way more courage than what I ever needed over there. Part of that courage has to be me being put into situtations where I need to educate people right now so that they don't look at me like a freak show. Maybe it would be an easier thing to explain if more people are aware and educated that this is a real problem and issue that we have and that there are lots of us out there.

Michelle

[Kathryn Martin]

If you support something because you are transgendered or transsexual then you diminish the message, if however you support something as a human being then what you have to say carries the full weight of you humanity. I support many things because as a human being I cannot stand idly by when injustice is done.

[michelleinktown]

If you support something because you are transgendered or transsexual then you diminish the message, if however you support something as a human being then what you have to say carries the full weight of you humanity. I support many things because as a human being I cannot stand idly by when injustice is done.

Totally agree, I need 20 characters, totally agree

[emmicd]

I believe Michelle was only trying to establish a way to get an important message out that transgendered individuals are people too and deserve to be understood and accepted. That's all! We are all trying to live our lives as normal people and we just want to be happy and find acceptance. I think that is very important and something that a transgendered individual needs when they boldly transition. I salute Tom Gabel who announced his transgender status as he transitions as a woman to be known as Laura Jane Grace. I salute her for her bravery. She is a hero to transgendered people the world over!

emmi

[JohnH]

Society has put a damper on people
who wear the opposite gender clothes; Like they cray some deadly disease.
Rader

Not so much of women wearing clothing traditionally worn by men; that is widely accepted. However, if men wear clothes traditionally worn by women, they are regarded as being at the least eccentric and worse, as perverts. How many boys have been fed the tripe of "Man up", "Boys don't do that", or "Boys don't wear that" and grow up being paranoid about the way the groom themselves or what they wear.

After all, when was the last time a woman as she was putting on a flannel shirt, jeans, and hiking shoes asked herself,"Is this womanly enough" but men with their paranoia ask themselves as they consider clothing or grooming, "Is this manly enough".

John

[Bree-asaurus]

Not so much of women wearing clothing traditionally worn by men; that is widely accepted. However, if men wear clothes traditionally worn by women, they are regarded as being at the least eccentric and worse, as perverts. How many boys have been fed the tripe of "Man up", "Boys don't do that", or "Boys don't wear that" and grow up being paranoid about the way the groom themselves or what they wear.

After all, when was the last time a woman as she was putting on a flannel shirt, jeans, and hiking shoes asked herself,"Is this womanly enough" but men with their paranoia ask themselves as they consider clothing or grooming, "Is this manly enough".

John

Hrmm... as I sit here in my pink flannel shirt and jeans :P

[FurPus63]

I can't believe what I've read on some of these posts. OMG! How selfish. I will never turn my back on this community and may I be cursed if I do! Sure my goal is to be a woman 100% and after SRS I guess I will be. At least I'll feel 100% like a woman and will be totally happy and fulfilled. But I hope I will never forget where I came from and never turn my back on those who are struggling as I was and still am as I go through my transition. I Thank God (my Higher Power) for all the Blessings I've received that have brought me to where I am today. I am have recently been accepted on my job and as a result can now live 24/7 presenting myself as a woman.

When I think about all the help I received and all the support including on this website forum; how could I ever turn my back on anyone who wanted and/or needed my advice, help, support, etc... The world is totally ignorant (especially in this country ) regarding this subject. They know next to nothing about it. As I have began to come out to my family, friends and co-workers it's amazing to me just how little they really understand. They think all transsexuals are nothing more than a bunch of sex craved maniacs. Is that what we want the world to think of us?

Paulette

[Traci Elizabeth]

I can't believe what I've read on some of these posts. OMG! How selfish Paulette



So you think I am selfish to want to live my life simply as a woman? Not to keep my past vivid and alive. I got news for you. You have no right to call me any name. You have not walked my journey and this is my life not yours. I am a victim of years of sexual abuse as well as being kidnapped, beaten to near death then violently raped, then beaten again until the criminal thought he knew I was dead. Then he left me in the deep woods naked covered in blood, broken bones, and a smashed in face for the scavengers to pick my flesh to the bones. ALL BECAUSE I WAS TRANSSEXUAL! So don't tell me I don't have the right to forget my past or my transsexualism. I am still seeing a Psychiatrist to help me move on from my transition.So how dare you!

[celeste26]

The most significant thing in your life was not because you were a woman but because you were transsexual. But given that fact under the circumstances it is simply not a wise thing for you to go out in public as an educator for others since you really have far too many other issues to deal with. If and when that terrible event stops being so profoundly significant then maybe you can offer help for others until that time you need to work on healing yourself If you never get over it ( and I sincerely do hope you can) then and only then can your special witness be added to other witnesses that help society move on.

There are many voices now already who are adding their witnesses for society and it is slowly getting better.

I also hope the ******* who did that to you never sees the light of day ever again

[Aprilrain]

Can we agree that we all have the right to choose our level of involvement in any particular arena of life? I have not been beaten, raped and left for dead and I still have no interest in activism it's just dosen't suit my personality. That being said most people who know me knew me before my transition so it's certainly no big secret. Personally I think transition is a one heart and mind at a time sorta game. When real people see other real people transition and see first hand that we are not sex crazed freaks then their minds are expanded. When people watch unreal celebrities on TV it's just boob tube food for idle curiosity, generally speaking people's heart's are not changed because they saw a TV show unless it has a specific meaning to them personally.

[Frances]

When I think about all the help I received and all the support including on this website forum; how could I ever turn my back on anyone who wanted and/or needed my advice, help, support, etc... The world is totally ignorant (especially in this country ) regarding this subject. They know next to nothing about it. As I have began to come out to my family, friends and co-workers it's amazing to me just how little they really understand. They think all transsexuals are nothing more than a bunch of sex craved maniacs. Is that what we want the world to think of us?
Paulette
I don't think Traci Elizabeth, for instance, at 1,700+ posts does not want to help those who need help. But every one has a right to NOT be an activist. We can all be advocates to the people around us at work, at home, etc., but once the transition is complete, the need to carry the flag goes away. If you tell someone you're trans, you give them and no chance to see you as a woman. You use the future tense a lot in your post Furpus, but you put to task people who have gone all the way.

[JohnH]

I think it is wonderful that Traci Elizabeth continues to contribute to this forum in her own special way. She decided to leave the forum but I'm so glad she came back.

Everybody's different - I still identify myself as male and use a male name on this forum even though I am on M2F HRT - which is a Godsend. Another person on the same regimen that I know has been on the regimen for a shorter time and has already changed the name to a feminine name and is planning to get SRS. I guess my level of activism would simply be to blaze the way for males to have more freedom of clothing and grooming - such as at SkirtCafe.org.

Traci has her right to live her life as a woman the same way as I have my right to live my life as a male freed from the bondage imposed by society on males.

Now that I think about it before puberty I had light delicate skin the bruised easily, look dainty in face, and walked on my tip-toes. At that time I used to get beat up and bruised all the time. However, when puberty kicked in my voice deepened to a baritone when I was 13 years of age but I was still regarded as a geek.

Traci, my heart goes out to you for the suffering you went through. I knew you were violently assaulted and raped, but by the grace of God you were able to survive and I appreciate your contributions to this forum.

John

[Kaitlyn Michele]

It is not selfish at all to choose your own life...

THAT IS WHAT BEING TRANSSEXUAL IS REALLY ALL ABOUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There is this totally screwy idea that falls flat on inspection... This idea is that because you are transsexual you OWE other transsexuals..

Do white men owe white men anything?? Do breast cancer victims OWE other Breast cancer victims?? on and on, take your pick...

All we owe each other is respect and compassion (and some would argue thats not even true...its dog eat dog in the real world people)...

It's especially galling to see traci being attacked for choosing to lay low in the "real world" after all the time spent here...and i usually argue with her!!

[Traci Elizabeth]

you really have far too many other issues to deal with.


Now, I am really getting upset! Are you my Psychiatrist now? You have no fricken idea what you are talking about and have no right to make such an outlandish statement.

Even my Psychiatrist states that I will never forget what happened to me and that I should not. I have no doubt that he is correct. But I refuse to be a victim again.

Nevertheless, I am a very positive upbeat loving caring woman with a strong emotional grasp on reality. So, actually I have NO other issues other than the one I mentioned. I am very much an advocate for women who have been abused or victimized. Through my church, I counsel women and give them strength by telling my victimization story to them and how I survived and moved forward in my life, as well as teaching women how not to be a victim again through self defense and deadly force. I also do a lot of volunteer work for homeless woman.

I also refuse to go around broadcasting that at one time I was a transsexual and again neither you or anyone else has the right to persecute me for my life's choices - PERIOD!

So tell me Celeste, how is you think you know me and have the right to make such a statement?

[Anna Lorree]

High profile cases like Tom/Laura Gabel certainly help the political cause. However, when I present as female, my intent is to pass. That means nobody knows I am anything other than a "normal" cis-gender female. If I transition, my intent will be to look, act and feel as much like a female as possible. Yeah, if I transition I would go stealth if possible. Why put up with all of the social and political crap?

This is one of the reasons the trans community has such a hard time gaining political support, if the TS community is successful, most simply fade into the fabric of society, which is all they ever wanted in the first place. People transition to be themselves and find peace and happiness, not beat a political drum.

Anna

[Traci Elizabeth]

High profile cases like Tom/Laura Gabel certainly help the political cause. However, when I present as female, my intent is to pass. That means nobody knows I am anything other than a "normal" cis-gender female. If I transition, my intent will be to look, act and feel as much like a female as possible. Yeah, if I transition I would go stealth if possible. Why put up with all of the social and political crap?

This is one of the reasons the trans community has such a hard time gaining political support, if the TS community is successful, most simply fade into the fabric of society, which is all they ever wanted in the first place. People transition to be themselves and find peace and happiness, not beat a political drum.
Anna



Well said !

Nevertheless, I am done with this thread and regret even responding in the first place. I had no idea that so many of you are the way you are and attack someone like me who has contributed so much on trying to help others here and to share my experiences.

[Nicole Erin]

I am in shock that kate has not dropped in for a say about this one.

But yeah as far as living as a woman - I don't feel the need to talk about it. Sure people figure it out but i don't really think or worry about it. I mean I don't even pass that great and I am not wanting to "educate the public". I don't get how some go thru spending a ton of money and reach some "passable" state only to become a spokesperson. Kind of defeats the purpose of transitioning. I can see where some CDs would want to do such a thing ( the late Virginia Prince) but yeah most TS just kind of want to move on with life.

[michelleinktown]

OMG

I had had no idea when I posted this that it would cause so much trouble.

All I was trying to say is that it is good to see people from all walks of life not ashamed of who they are anymore. I am not saying to stand on a box in the middle of town and scream out what we are and for people to treat us with respect. That respect is coming on it's own when we come out to friends, work, family and anybody who shows an interest in what it must be like to be transitioning.


Every time someone comes out of the closet and says %$#@ I've had enough of living like this somewhere someone is getting educated the right way I would hope.

I too think I am done with this thread. I really had no idea that this would have caused so much negativity

[Kristy_K]

I agree a lot with what Traci said. Transitioning is not easy to being with. When I started my transition I educated the people in my life about being TS and feel I was a spokesperson at that time. Now that I am very near the end of my transition I don't want to remind people of where I was before. I just want to live my life as normal as I can now. Depending on what normal is.

[RachelOKC]

There's no right and no wrong to this issue. Everyone needs to determine their own path and follow it. If some people want to disappear into the world, then by all rights they should. Tis not for me or anyone else to tell them otherwise. There will always be people who are visible and will try to speak for those who can't or won't.

I've done volunteer work in the GLBT community for a long time and I hope to continue doing so long into the future, hopefully professionally at some point. I feel a strong need to do something meaningful in my life, where I am actually helping people with real problems - not some soulless and thankless job based on ephemera. I want to be able to contribute and maybe give someone a chance or a service that wasn't there for me when I needed it the most. I see very serious needs within the trans community - one only needs to sample all the anguish on these boards to know there just isn't enough help out there. I think that's where I can be of real benefit, because I already understand what it's like.

Most of us understand and most of us could help in some way if we wanted to. An obligation? Absolutely not. It's just what I think is right for me, not for anybody else.

[Sharon]

It is not anyone's responsibility to be a spokesperson for anything -- period! Some are better at contributing by actions rather than words, and others are simply not equipped to do either. I can personally attest that I know one or two transsexuals that I pray will never (NEVER!) speak for me or any other person because they would only cause more confusion or harm than good.

Judge not....

[christinac]

If you support something because you are transgendered or transsexual then you diminish the message, if however you support something as a human being then what you have to say carries the full weight of you humanity. I support many things because as a human being I cannot stand idly by when injustice is done.

Very very well put!!


It is not anyone's responsibility to be a spokesperson for anything -- period! Some are better at contributing by actions rather than words, and others are simply not equipped to do either. I can personally attest that I know one or two transsexuals that I pray will never (NEVER!) speak for me or any other person because they would only cause more confusion or harm than good.

Judge not....

Excellent point also.