Too perfect?

[Lesley_Roberta]

Still new to the game, so my take on things will show, but, I was just looking at some pics of our community here, and the thing that always comes to mind, is, no, you don't look 'bad', the thing is, you look too good, or rather you look too flawless.

Real women just don't seem to look this perfect normally.

I think you will stand out as fake more likely from being too obviously flawless, than from being unable to hide male based clues.

I've been studying women, to see what they wear, how they do their hair, what shape their clothes are in, whether they can even dress themselves intelligently or not. Levels of make up, if any at all.

That's basically it. You guys are not making enough fashion mistakes, not being lazy enough, just plain not sucking accurately :)

I've been watching girls, that naked would drive a guy to an easy state of arrousal, but dressed, they look the equal of guys that make me think 'in what world do women find that appealing?'. Girls simply can't do the baggy pants half off the ass plumbers crack or underwear badly exposed look. They don't make girls pants fit the way it would be required to do that. But girls CAN make plenty of choices in how to look dreadful.

I mean, crap, I'm near killing myself with negativity directed towards my spare tire on the waist here, and I am wondering, hmm what's the point? Fully 50% of the women I see are fat lard assed equals of us fat lard ass males. And they insist on wearing clothes just as badly as us. I'd guess the female equal of the male habit of wearing pants belted below a large gut (which is the reason their pants never fit without a lot of ass crack being a regular view), is for the ladies to wear form fitting tights made for a woman of great health and light weight, on a frame of lame health, and great weight.

Every day isn't Friday night guys. You can't be dolled up for a hot date, if you are not going on a hot date on Friday night. It looks weird when you walk around like that Wednesday morning at the mall or going into the coffee shop.

Sorry to be cruel here, but some of the images I have seen, look like you are trying too hard. Unless of course some of us are trying to look like working girls (who knows, maybe you are :)).

I have this wig I want so bad. But I wonder, will it look too damn perfect?
I want to look like an ordinary woman in her 50s, for 10 in the morning at Tim Horton's for a daily hot chocolate. I don't want to look like I'm a cougar or a gal prowling a dance club Saturday night.

Yah know, I'd actually be upset, if I looked so good I could get a man to flirt with me. I want to be invisible. I want to be the woman no one really looks at, as she's just another woman. Not even worth noticing. Hair that looks like it was thrown into a pony tail in under 3 minutes because 'its not like I am going anywhere, I'm just out getting a coffee before shopping for the family groceries'. I want my clothes to say something like 'hey, I'm not going out for dinner eh, I'm taking a break from the laundry'.

Well that is my goal at least. I want to be a boring ordinary girl. I AM a boring ordinary girl in here. I'm stuck in a boring ordinary male body too. There's likely no slim black evening dress in my future. Hell I should be so lucky to have a nice place to go dancing to begin with. I have no beach, so really, whether I can wear a stunning swimsuit or not (ok not), is really not the issue.

I need something that looks like shopping at Zellers, or taking a break at Tim Horton's. I want to be able to walk into Canadian Tire, and get asked if I need help, and not be 'can I help you mam', just 'can I help you', and not get any real reaction at all.

Winning to me, is wearing something ordinary, but bought in the women's department, that barely looks special, almost male fashion, but not really, and requiring no make up, because I rarely see women wearing it at the times of the day I am out, and being able to have a hairdo that says 'barely felt like caring'.
And looking so utterly common, I am not even noticed at all.

I mean, I'm married, I am SOOOOO not looking for a man, so what would be the point of looking good enough I could land one? Getting hit on regularly would just be a good way of telling the whole damn town I was a **** tease non gay weirdo.

I HAVE asked myself, if I actually DID get the operation, went the route of being FULL female (inasmuch as that is ever going to be possible for a person with a body built for a man), would I eventually want a man?
I watch a lot of anime you see, and one common plot theme or plot notion, is the guy that gets transformed quite literally into a real female, not just an operation, but magically transformed. And they explore the obvious question of 'if tomorrow you really were a real female, all the way, would you fight the life expected of females?'.
But of course, that is one of my usual favourite musings, what makes a person want the opposite sex?
If the change were like a light switch, something that could be turned on and off, how would you use the ability?

Part of me wishes something like Kashi Mashi Girl meets Girl was possible so I could enjoy really being a girl all the way.
Part of me wishes something like Ranma 1/2 was possible so I could enjoy the best of both worlds.

[Kate Simmons]

I actually do the "magical" thing because something transforms at one point when I go en femme. Even though I use physical props to accomplish my goals, it is a little bit of "smoke and mirrors". If you see my pics you know that I, by no means, ever have a "perfect" look because who really has all that time to obsess over appearance? I never have all my hairs in place and have learned to "fake" many things like women do.I had a good teacher with that--my wife. When it comes to makeup, I've gotten to the point where it looks like I am wearing little to none. I have to be creative with that as I have beard shadow and to cover that up and tone down the makeup is challenging to say the least. Even so, I need to be somewhat "classy" in my overall look. As you say, looking like a stumble bum takes little effort but looking like a classy gal who is nice but somewhat independent and unassuming takes some doing. The overall look and impression it gives is important.

The image I really want to convey en femme is that of a "free spirit" who has fun but when it comes to getting the job done is dead serious. Having the freedom to do this and express myself the way I choose helps, not everyone can do that. Even so, my purpose is to do something value added even while I'm enjoying myself. The overall look and outlook is what really makes it work for me.:)

[STACY B]

You dont think 99% of the chix on here dont want to look like normal gurlz ? Hell we all want that ,,So if ya dont want to wear alot of makeup an crazy clothes do what the rest of us do ,,, Go get your face lasered buy regular stuff from the store like all the rest of the ladys ,,Stay away from the platforms an mini skirts an fishnets .Thats all ,,Just do like all the girls in the world do ,,Ol well better let you go you gotta a lot of appointments an miney to spend .Good luck ..

[Kimberlyfaye]

If it were like a switch I would switch it off, (or on depending which way was female) and leave it there. I am the same as you though in the sense that I don't want a man. I have a girlfriend and will always be attracted to girls. But that doesn't mean I don't want the attention. If a guy is interested in the group I might be out with I would like to think he's interested in me too. If I look like one of the girls, great, if he flirts with me because I pass, even better. He still wont get me though. I'm not out to get attention but any straight GG will like attention at some point even if she's not looking for a guy. If I want to be a girl then I want to act the part.

I own regular jeans, t-shirts, hoodies etc. I love being an ordinary boring girl. And like any girl I love getting all dressed up in a pretty dress and heels. I think it's part of being a girl. I would love to be able to tie my hair back in a pony tail but it's a wig so I can't :-( Just another reason why I want to be boring but sometimes noticed.

Just my thoughts. I do like your post though Lesley. Very interesting points.

Mikayla x

[Cynthia Anne]

In todays hurry up world there's so many things to be considered! Women just don't have time to get all fancied up to go shopping or to just run an erand! But that doesn't mean they never try to look there best! The ones on here that look ''too perfect'' to you are very lucky to be able to do that! If I'm going to have a picture taken to show the world then of course I want to look like a movie star and not like I've been cleaning out barns all day! I commend all the ones here that have pictures rather they are ''too perfect'' or look like a man in a dress! I would love to look ''too perfect''! Hugs!

[NicoleScott]

News flash! We're not all the same.
If you want to look ordinary, go for it. Some of us choose to express ourselves differently. Too bad you have a problem with it.

[TGMarla]

When I present myself as a lady, I like to do my best to be a pretty lady. I'm not under any false illusions that I'm fooling anyone with it. If and when I venture out into the world, it's probable that most will clock me from quite a distance, whether or not I'm dressed up or dressed down. The trick there is to not care and carry on anyway with whatever you went out to do in the first place. But this is my little hobby, my little fantasy, and I get to enjoy it without baggy jeans, without boring shoes, and without sloppy tops. When I'm en femme, I'm a refined lady. I crossdress so that I can enjoy pretty dresses, nice jewelry, fancy shoes, hosiery, and a good makeup job. So do whatever you wish with your time. I'll stick to presenting as elegantly as I am able, and if that stands out in a crowd, then so be it. If modern women don't look this way, it's their loss. I'm not out to blend in; I'm out to look good, as well as I'm able to.

[Beth Mays]

If something is worth doing its worth doing right!
one person's idea of good enough is someone else's half ass.. Really.... do you just shave your legs to the knees?
when I dress I want to look as good as I can even if I have no intrest taking a step out the door.. It's for me alone... not some CD police to decide how I should look ..
I need include a few flaws just to look like someone else... or someone's idea of how I should look. DONT LOOK!

[Sara Jessica]

It's too bad I can almost see the point you are making after so many inappropriate digs at natal females.

Seriously, no one is stopping you from dumbing down your wig and taking your self-described spare tire out on the town. I'm guessing you'll either be ignored as you desire or perceived as a sloppy guy who is wearing a wig for some reason. Either way, it's your choice and it doesn't require making nasty comments about women to drive a point home.

[Babeba]

You know, people in glass houses...

I really resent you saying that GGs who do not dress with the specific trends you prefer in mind are lazy ugly or that they suck. I agree with you that Wednesday morning errands is a different look from Friday night dates, but that does not mean that Friday night date look is 'perfect' or the ideal. Can you imagine bending down to get milk from the cooler in a dress as short as the ones posted on here??

To GGs every day is usually more about function than the latest trends, once you are out of high school. The majority of GGs are very busy people who balance a lot in their lives, just like men. Do you think about the latest trends first thing when you get up in the morning to dress in drab, or do you think, 'what am I doing today? How hot is it going to be outside?'

About people choosing fashions you don't like on their size: they are probably satisfied with themselves in a way I don't know that you can be, if you are so caught up in thinking that the opinions of random strangers matter.

[kitchenette]

Thanks, Babs. I agree with everything you wrote. Well said.

It sounds to me like Shared... know what she wants for herself (That's a good thing) but is living in a state of judgment about the way others express themselves. Oftentimes, when I am feeling judgmental toward others it's because I am unhappy with my own life. On good days when I am less conflicted in myself and feeling strong about who I am, I am easier on others as well. The things I tend not to like in other people are things that I want to get rid of within myself. There's no right and wrong way to be. I've heard some CDers complain that GGs don't dress up anymore, too. There's just no accounting for taste, we all have our unique perspective, thankfully. Because life would be incredibly dull if we were all the same.

[Barbara Ella]

For a true GG, there are 7 days in the week. For a lot of us here there may be a couple of days in the week, so they can dress casual for a couple of those days. For the majority of us here, given the time we have to dress, there is only one day in the week, and it IS Friday night. If I cannot dress for extended periods, I want to make the most of what I have. If I get more girl time, I will probably adopt some more casual attire befitting of what a woman wears throughout the week.

I also do not relate to the modern woman. My woman is from the 50's and that is how I think I should be.

Barbara

[Tina B.]

You know when I run to the store, and I'm in a pair of old jeans, old tee shirt, didn't bother to shave this morning, and just threw on a dirty old ball cap, the first thing I notice is how bad the woman trying to control three small kids and get her grocery shopping done, is dressed. As I scratch my beer belly wondering why a women would wear a pair of jeans that give her a muffin top, or why she has on that plain old shirt with a strange picture on it instead of a pretty top, (oh not a picture, the baby threw up.) Doesn't she know her legs would look better in heels? I guess mom knew what she was talking about when she said "There is a time and a place for everything." If you want to see women dressed up, try a club, or church. If you want to see a guy dressed up, you have to check his office. The rest of the time, we all go for comfortable, or practical.
Tina B.

[Marleena]

Well @Shared you are new here but you will get the GG's upset with comments like that. It is understandable too because the GG's have nothing to prove. So they don't need or want to dress up every day. Go to a wedding or formal event and you'll see just how nicely they can dress up when they need to. GM's are the same jeans and tees most of the time.

If you're referring to the Picture Gallery here, yes we do try our best to look female. That means dressing up because we NEED to work on looking good. You'll see cleavage and short skirts and high heels, anything to make our female illusion better. It is what it is. Most of the TG girls that go out in public dress down in order to blend in with the GG's though, depending on the venue.:)

[sometimes_miss]

If you want to see a guy dressed up, you have to check his office. The rest of the time, we all go for comfortable, or practical.
Tina B.
I no longer agree; I used to dress 'casual slob' a lot; not really messy, but kind of downgraded, meaning khakis, polo shirt and sneakers nearly all the time. But learned I feel a whole lot better when dressed 'nice', and it doesn't take that much effort at all. About 90% of the time now I'm wearing nice slacks, dress shirt and jacket when I go out, until it gets too hot. I also take the sports car instead of the truck.
As far as all crossdressers dressing 'too perfect', well we go for a 'look' that clearly spells female in order to overcome a body that shouts 'guy'. Real women don't have to do that; their body says 'female' even in a tee shirt and jeans, and I think I speak for lots of us when I write we'd be quite happy to look like that if we had the option. Most of my girl outfits aren't 'over the top'; they're every day school wear for millions of girls in high school. The only thing perfect about me is my really pretty fake hair, but if I could still grow my own like that, I would.

[Chickhe]

Sure...but... you have to offset the male characteristics a little but by going a little more feminine. You can't dress like a slob and expect to be recognized as a female. On the flip sde, if you way over dress then you attract attention and then get scutinized. It depends what your goal is, if its to blend in, I find used clothing actually helps because it have a slightly well used look...great for jeans, shoes. If you are going to looking glamorous, then a dress and hair all done up...that's what you see a lot on web because its not for going out, its for show.

[Karren H]

Yeah Right.... My too perfect wrinkles are just unbelievable!. I'm not trying to fit in... I'm trying to stand out!!

[Lesley_Roberta]

Sorry if I have offended anyone, sadly, being an Aries, subtle is NOT in my nature. Calls em as I sees them. Worst person to ask for advice is an Aries, oh you is so getting the whole truth unvarnished whatsoever.

But that is just me, I call it a failing even though society seems to worship the truth (just so long as it never hurts).

I think it is not a bad thing to try ones best. And why take a picture of ourselves at only 60% of what we might be eh. None of the pictures I have ever taken have me at anything but my best.

But for me personally, I suppose it is important for me to mention, I don't wish to CD part time. Leslie is only in my life in the morning for a couple of hours then he's gone. And what he wants doesn't require a wardrobe. He leaves me to do everything afterwards.
I'm a girl right now, I will be a girl in an hour and the rest of the day too. I will be a girl tomorrow, and all week.
I am unsure I will ever get the pleasure of looking like one, at all poorly or otherwise. Lots of questions need to be answered though yet still for me. Still a mountain of things I have not even discovered I need answered. Biggest surprise I have had so far, is that they actually make wigs I'd like in the first place. 2 months ago, I knew precisely nothing about wigs. I found a web site that was fairly crawling with wigs. OMG levels of wigs.

If I was single, there would be no 'maybe' about a few things. I've had to make very hard choices because being married I have had to accept, it isn't 'all about me'.
Being single comes with some VERY big perks that are never really obvious till you find yourself with choices you would never have imagined before hand.

My goal, if I could have any goal I suppose, is to discontinue worrying about buying guys clothes.
I'd rather be known as Lesley, I'd rather dress as Lesley all day. I'd like my usual attire to be Lesley's attire. I don't need any of Leslie's clothes. What he wants in my life doesn't require clothes. And he's gone before I even hit the tub in the morning.
Yesterday I found myself realizing, 'damn, I only own one pair of shorts worth comment'. And for the first time I understood, you can't wear the same damned thing all the time. It hasn't been important to me before. And now I find myself wondering, ok more shorts, hmmm can I score something middle of the road that will make it so I don't need to jump in with both feet so much?
I have been realizing all my socks are too masculine.
I just discovered the other day, 'dang but I like ladies deoderant so much more now'.

I want it all. I want the outfit for dancing, and I want the kick around clothes. I might even like an office power suit just for chance I need one. Never liked suits before for men though, don't have one now and never have either. One of the best lines I have ever been told where business is concerned (was on a small business course), was 'wear what you want, the boss doesn't answer to anyone eh'.

Ultimately, I would be wearing the biggest smile possible if whatever I had on was covered in sawdust. Sawdust = woodworking, woodworking = my great passion.
If I possessed a million bucks in my pocket right now, I'd need a wig with a pony tail probably, and work clothes. I might never wear anything much else.

I suppose part of my initial post's comments were partly aimed at one crowd that might be partly the wrong audience.
If I only wished to doll up on special days as a treat to myself, I almost certainly would want to look 100% or why bother trying.
No one ever sets off to only do half as well as they think they can do (I am assuming that at least).
Not sure what my own 100% might look to an observer, not been there yet.
I might look like hell :)
But as long as I like it I guess.
I might be a horrible perfectionist impossible to please. We are often are worst enemies.

I guess the thing is, I don't wish to 'dress up' I want to just plain convert.

My ideal, I want to surprise someone and make them respond with 'wait, you're really a guy?'.

I can live with guys looking at me like we already know how men look at women that are not covergirls.
Girls are not all covergirls.
I can accept life has not made covergirl something I can aim for :)
I've seen guys (in Japan thanks to liking anime), that frankly can look better than just about ANY female in our community on their best day hehe. And these guys had only consented to letting someone goof around with them as a lark for a TV show. They would never have done it otherwise.
Who knows, maybe someone with the skills common to Holywood could make me a bombshell. That would be so cool to learn how to do on my own.
But I am realistic, I think I will be doing pretty damned good if I can measure up to a 6 eh. I'll take that 6.

It's ok to be a 6.
6s are people too.

[Joanna41]

I dress to suit my likes and desires...bottom line

Joanna

[Kate Simmons]

I've heard that "What, you are really a guy?" line ever so often. Kind of makes me good when I hear that Lesley. As my friend Kelly said the other day femininity gives you power, as does the image of femininity over those poor unsuspecting guys. Gotta love it Hon.:battingeyelashes::)

[~Joanne~]

I dress to suit my likes and desires...bottom line

Joanna

I agree 100%. I don't care about trends. Fashion shows are aimed at the have's not the have nots. I don't think I have ever seen as of the runway fashions in a store on the street and if I did I probably can't afford them lol I can't afford the things I get now lol

[AllieSF]

Truth is good and most people want the truth. Sometimes it hurts and is better not stated, or at least stated in a gentle manner. However, the words you speak, though true to you, seem to be indicating an inner confusion to me. As you have said, you are new to this, thought that you could never find a wig for you and now it sounds like you have. So, my recommendation is to read, learn, explore and experiment until you find out what works for you and worry less about what you think that you may want. Like all things in life, that actually comes naturally. It is the decision process to enjoy that what we like that is so difficult for some. I will guess that 6 months from now your words above may be very different from today. Dressing, passing, blending, and fitting in, or not, are just different goals for different people. I do not mind standing out while "well" dressed. That is one of my goals, to look good when Xdressed.

[Lesley_Roberta]

Oh there is a LOT of inner confusion in here AllieSF :)

[Shananigans]

I've been watching girls, that naked would drive a guy to an easy state of arrousal, but dressed, they look the equal of guys that make me think 'in what world do women find that appealing?'. Girls simply can't do the baggy pants half off the ass plumbers crack or underwear badly exposed look. They don't make girls pants fit the way it would be required to do that. But girls CAN make plenty of choices in how to look dreadful.

This entire post is a really good example of what "hypocrisy" means. Oddly enough, many middle schoolers have a hard time understanding/recognizing hypocrisy. (You may want to pay attention, because this may prove useful to you too). It's one thing to know the definition of a word. However, it takes keen insight to fully recognize the meaning behind words we use to describe typical behavior. So, this would be a great situation to use for anyone that might be uncertain of what hypocrisy means.

Let's break this down...

What we have here is a man that is wearing women's clothes in a culture where this is somewhat taboo. You would probably venture to say that it is "frowned upon." However, this man wears women's clothes in a society where this has been deemed not becoming of males. This SAME guy that wears women's clothes goes on a rant about how women wear certain things that are not becoming of women. We are offered judgements on what women "simply can't do" from a man that wears women's clothes in a society that deems this something that a man "simply cannot do."

F*cking brilliant example. Did you mean for this? If not, HATS OFF TO YOU... My friend actually teaches middle schoolers and tells me all of the time about how it is sometimes difficult for them to apply their vocabulary. I can see how hypocrisy could be a somewhat difficult word to understand...so, I think what we have hear is an excellent example for her teaching plan.

You know what is also a fun concept? Reading between the lines. Sometimes, a writer can be going on about a topic on a surface level, but you really have to READ BETWEEN THE LINES on what he/she is actually trying to say.

A good example would be a guy that is writing about a subject that on a surface level appears not to be a bunch of sexist bashing towards women...but, when you read between the lines, you just get this weird feeling that this is actually the root of the narrative.

Another good example of reading between the lines would be when someone responds to this author with examples of idiotic behavior that appear to actually be ABOUT him...without actually saying he is a dumb$$, sexist out right.

Very educational material that we have gathered today. Good job, team.

[Babeba]

Lesley, I'm not saying dont try to be who you are. I am saying that 100% for one situation will be 'don't give a ****' from another. Also that everyone has their own priorities, and someone is not lazy just because their priorities are different to yours.

[Rebecca Star]

News flash! We're not all the same.
If you want to look ordinary, go for it. Some of us choose to express ourselves differently. Too bad you have a problem with it.

Well said Nicole.

As long as everyone is happy, who cares.
I'll add, while I respect people's opinions and their right to say what they like, I don't see the point in making a post which ultimately puts the ladies around here down...nuff said!

[Marleena]

I'll add, while I respect people's opinions and their right to say what they like, I don't see the point in making a post which ultimately puts the ladies around here down...nuff said!

Agreed.. actually it put all women down. Not a good thing to do. I'm sure there would be an uproar if a GG put down CDer's. Just something to think about.

[Rebecca Star]

actually it put all women down. Not a good thing to do.

Your so right, good point Marleena.
Without sounding melodrama, it's comments/statements like these from the OP which could push someone over the edge. Stuff like this really annoys me.

[Lorileah]

First, what you see everyday is what people do everyday: what you see here is what people do maybe once a week.
Although I agree that you can learn a lot by watching, you need to realize that everyone, OK almost everyone, just dresses to get by on average. Time and need are the base for getting ready on a daily basis. If I had to do all the things I do every morning I would have to get up at least an hour early.

Second, and this has been pointed out, everyone has a different idea of fashion. Truly some things I see men and women wear I just wonder what they were thinking. There was a show on TV last night where designers were competing and I would never wear 3/4 of the stuff they put out there. There is also function. Try working all day in heels...or a skirt. Depending on the job, well it isn't practical at all. Make up- is hot and can make you fell smothered. Hose are hot and sticky. I have no idea what function a necktie has.

Don't be fooled by photos like mine. It took hours to get the look and it was set up as a special occasion. If I were to dress 24/7, believe me it is a whole different story

[Nicole Erin]

Christ of christs, they finally did away with our resident "You are NOT a transsexual" preacher and now this gem surfaces.

I don't know why the modz bother to ban the ones who are negative about everything cause really, those members are just filling a slot. Get rid of them and a new one comes to fill the slot.

So if a CD doesn't dress to blend in, does that mean they are NOT a true CD?

[Antoinette]

Hah! Perfect? Far from it. I doubt any of us try to be a "perfect female". When I dress, I dress for the occassion. When out and about the look is casual. When clubbing I get dolled up. Like most people stated, everyone has their reasons. Even GG get dolled up and days they're not doing anything. I've seen GG get dolled up just to go to work and to me it seemed unnecssary, but is it a bad thing, nope not at all. There's that one thing that keeps us guys from blending in (unless we wear a scarf or a turtle neck) and that's the obvious "adams apple". It's generally the dead give away whether we know it or not.

[Jocelyn Quivers]

To GGs every day is usually more about function than the latest trends, once you are out of high school. The majority of GGs are very busy people who balance a lot in their lives, just like men. Do you think about the latest trends first thing when you get up in the morning to dress in drab, or do you think, 'what am I doing today? How hot is it going to be outside?'

About people choosing fashions you don't like on their size: they are probably satisfied with themselves in a way I don't know that you can be, if you are so caught up in thinking that the opinions of random strangers matter.

You bring up an excellent point for this GM. When living the male mode life the first thing in the morning for me is do I wear "briefs/tighty whitey's" or box boxer's today :confused:with the decision being all of 5 to 10 seconds to make. Outside of that maybe 2 minutes as of what to wear outside.

As other's have said with me it is 100% smoke and mirrors, note thats why I never stand in my pics or show pics from the back or side angles because they would go from being very pretty to downright scary.:D

[Chardonnay Merlot]

I've been studying women, to see what they wear, how they do their hair, what shape their clothes are in, whether they can even dress themselves intelligently or not. Levels of make up, if any at all.

That's basically it. You guys are not making enough fashion mistakes, not being lazy enough, just plain not sucking accurately

Well, after consultation with my closest GG peoples in my life, the conclusion reached was "there is no such thing as too flawless".

Nobody who takes a little time getting themselves together for the day wants to make fashion mistakes, even busy people take that extra time to look good. I know I do regardless of which gender I present at a particular moment. I take just as much effort in what I wear as a man as I do when I am presenting as a woman, the only different I've had more experience on one side as opposed to the other.

You wish to blend in and your way of blending in is to look as "normal" as possible. Noting that your definition of normal is your own.

I wish to blend in as well, but I also have to please to one most important person. That face I look in my mirror every morning, and I find I blend in and stand out, the two are not mutually exclusive..


Winning to me, is wearing something ordinary, but bought in the women's department, that barely looks special, almost male fashion, but not really, and requiring no make up, because I rarely see women wearing it at the times of the day I am out, and being able to have a hairdo that says 'barely felt like caring'.
And looking so utterly common, I am not even noticed at all.

I mean, I'm married, I am SOOOOO not looking for a man, so what would be the point of looking good enough I could land one? Getting hit on regularly would just be a good way of telling the whole damn town I was a **** tease non gay weirdo.

And now we come to the inherent weakness of your argument. The stereotypically male concept that looking good automatically equals "i want to attract somebody."
Sometimes that is true, but most times people want to look nice, because of what they want to think and feel and not because of an outside motive. In my case, I enjoy looking good because I was raised to enjoy looking good even if I'm just going to the store. What is the point of looking like a hot mess. You can be as "boring" and "ordinary" as you want to be, but I would caution against making judgment against those of us who strive for a little more than that, even in more mundane circumstances.

There is a time and place for everything. No, I wouldn't wear something I'd wear to the club to go grocery shopping. But even in a casual mode in either gender, I like coordinate what I wear because of the way it affects me. The way it makes me feel.

The OP says more about the person writing it than the people deemed "too perfect."
My belief is that life is too short to go through it being "boring and ordinary". I'm all for standing out and being me...that's living. :)

[Lesley_Roberta]

I am NOT going to say what I want to say. Maybe Leslie would, but that is not me.

Suffice it to say I AM offended. This thread no longer exists. Thanks to those that tried to encourage, get lost to those that seem best capable of being INTENTIONALLY negative.

I offered my comments with good intentions, it's not my fault if you are bitter inside for your own reasons. Good luck in your life.

[katie_barns]

I was a little lazy on this post. I read the original but not all the responses. So this may have been covered.

A GG can throw on anything and still be a girl. If I just throw on anything and walked out. I would be a guy or maybe a guy in a dress. It takes a little more work to pull off the illusion.
True we can go overboard. I have a consignment store that I shop at regularly. The owner knows me. The first time I showed up as Katie. She clocked me right off the bat.

Very disappointed I asked her what I was doing wrong? Her answer was that basically she was very impressed with how I looked. I did a nice girl, but I was just too perfect. My clothing and makeup was appropriate for the time of day and what I was doing; but it looked like I had ironed my clothing and makeup was flawless, and I didn't have a hair out of place. She said that got her attention right off the bat, and then she started to see through the illusion and knew it was me.

Go figure, but a very valuable lesson.

[Marleena]

I am NOT going to say what I want to say. Maybe Leslie would, but that is not me.

Suffice it to say I AM offended. This thread no longer exists. Thanks to those that tried to encourage, get lost to those that seem best capable of being INTENTIONALLY negative.

No..Actually you can get lost! Most of us here are pretty cool and don't go around bashing GG's. You managed to insult them and some of the Cder's and TS girls that are trying hard to look good. My comments pointed that out while trying not to be insulting to you. If you see nothing wrong with your post you are the one that needs good luck.

Oh and usually I INTENTIONALLY try to make people feel good about themselves. We have enough grief as it is..

[Sandra]

Seeing as you can't all play nice this thread is done before it gets any more nasty, you got a problem with each other then take it to pm.