UNDERDRESSER
05-20-2012, 10:59 PM
So, I am straight. I am interested only in females. I have a friend I work with. I like her as a friend, and am anxious about losing her as a friend, and making work awkward. We both love the company and working here.
But,...... She is very attractive to me, so many things about her that scream out to me...
We went to dinner, and I basically laid out my dilemma, told her that it's entirely up to her, her decision, that the idea of making it difficult for her was a horror to me, but couldn't avoid asking the question.
The result? Friendzoned, sorta. She told me her last couple of relationships were too much for her, that she has too few friends to want to lose me as one... She doesn't want to get too tied up with someone until she feels she can set her own boundaries, and stop from getting overwhelmed and burnt out.
Some of you are saying, "yeah, right." But I believe her. This woman has integrity that just...radiates. ( one of her more endearing traits ) I think if nothing else, she would have said, "sorry, but I only think of you as a friend." if my chances were zero for anything else.
So, thats where we are. If things started to happen between us, I would have to tell her at a fairly early stage. (I simply could not keep this from her. ) I am thinking that I should tell her now, "well, before you start wasting valuable emotional energy on me, i should tell you this, it might make your decisions simpler."
I have a high degree of confidence, that even if it really turns her off, she wouldn't tell on me. She might encourage me to be more open about it, but I simply trust her enough that something told in confidence, wouldn't be spread around.
Opinions? I do not promise to take your advice.
But,...... She is very attractive to me, so many things about her that scream out to me...
We went to dinner, and I basically laid out my dilemma, told her that it's entirely up to her, her decision, that the idea of making it difficult for her was a horror to me, but couldn't avoid asking the question.
The result? Friendzoned, sorta. She told me her last couple of relationships were too much for her, that she has too few friends to want to lose me as one... She doesn't want to get too tied up with someone until she feels she can set her own boundaries, and stop from getting overwhelmed and burnt out.
Some of you are saying, "yeah, right." But I believe her. This woman has integrity that just...radiates. ( one of her more endearing traits ) I think if nothing else, she would have said, "sorry, but I only think of you as a friend." if my chances were zero for anything else.
So, thats where we are. If things started to happen between us, I would have to tell her at a fairly early stage. (I simply could not keep this from her. ) I am thinking that I should tell her now, "well, before you start wasting valuable emotional energy on me, i should tell you this, it might make your decisions simpler."
I have a high degree of confidence, that even if it really turns her off, she wouldn't tell on me. She might encourage me to be more open about it, but I simply trust her enough that something told in confidence, wouldn't be spread around.
Opinions? I do not promise to take your advice.