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Simply Joslyn
05-21-2012, 01:50 PM
Well I'm gonna be honest and say I'm pretty new to this, so try to give me a little leeway here if you can. I have alot of questions and few answers so I'll probably be all over the place for awhile.
Ok, well I'll start by telling what its been like to find myself. I've lived in northern nj all my life, no matter where I was though I didn't feel I fit in, I felt nervous, anxious, and lost. I spent most of my younger life asking myself questions like who am I, why am I here, what point do I serve in the grand scheme of things, why was I not someone else, or in a different time. I was often picked on in school, I guess because I was weird to them all, and a few years of feeling like the lowest pos on the planet, I just shutup, I became anti-social, I hid from conversations, and worst of all I hated myself. Why me I would ask, who did I kill in a past life to deserve this one, why not just end it right here, but something inside me told me to hold on to fight it, to live. I always just thought I was crazy, why else would people not want to be friends with me, and after all my head was always filled with more thoughts than words to express them.
Around when I was 13 I saw my mother and older sister putting old bins with clothes in my closet, after all I'm a guy what do I need a closet for. Something that night clicked in my head, said do it go for it. And so I did, and this rush, this feeling, I looked in the mirror and for once I didn't feel hated, I didn't feel I hated myself, I felt happy and for once like something was right. And yet I hated myself for it, what the heck is wrong with you, you must be messed up, you should just end it you aren't worth it, your broken. But I couldn't let go of that feeling and so I began to dress quite frequently, I would purge often, and hate myself for it later, and still I thought why do I care. Its taken over 6 years to come to grips with myself, I no longer feel the hate, the anguish, but I felt nothing, I felt lost, but the dressing still remained, and then I came here. It surprised me, all the stories and people. And I met some friends one of which sent me a wig, and when it arrived I immediately slipped it on, shoulder length brown my natural color, and I looked in my mirror, and finally saw what piece was missing all my life, her. The side I bottled up and hid within me, and there it was me but not me, someone different, someone comfortable, someone who knows who they are. And I continued to look and realized it was me and noone else. And I felt that comfort wash over me, that knowing.

And so I felt I finally knew where to go with my life, and so I came here, it took a little for me to get the courage to talk about it, but I knew I had to. I'm sorry this was so long I just needed it out of my system, but let me know how you found out how you knew, I still have at least a year till I head out and make my decision permanently, but I feel I know now.

Lesley_Roberta
05-21-2012, 02:01 PM
You need to like yourself before you can move forward. We hear the comment all the time eh. Easy to say it, not as easy to listen to it.

Why I am where I am now, is due to a lot of hate that never came from anyone else.

It's ok to hang out with yourself until you like yourself enough to share yourself with others.

Simply Joslyn
05-21-2012, 02:11 PM
You need to like yourself before you can move forward. We hear the comment all the time eh. Easy to say it, not as easy to listen to it.

Why I am where I am now, is due to a lot of hate that never came from anyone else.

It's ok to hang out with yourself until you like yourself enough to share yourself with others.
I finally do, I understand for once where I'm going, who I am, and that I'm not alone, and thats all I really ever needed I suppose. I also have come to my own understanding that guilt and hate are simply emotions caused by caring what others think, I have maybe 100 years on this earth and I'm not gonna waste it moping around caring what the general crowd thinks as long as I'm happy thats all fine with me. I've decided to be me and go hang out with a few other members over the weekend in ny and central jersey, place I probably wouldn't have gone before, but I'm happy to release myself.

Jorja
05-21-2012, 02:35 PM
You my dear are not broken, messed up, haven't killed anyone in another life and believe me, you are worth it. You might be crazy but that does help around here ;). I am glad to see you get it. Get out there and be you. Life is too short to hide in a closet.

Kristy_K
05-21-2012, 04:01 PM
Accepting one self is the hardest thing to do in my opinion but it is also the most rewarding experience in life when you do.

You open up a whole new world for yourself.

Julia_in_Pa
05-21-2012, 04:15 PM
Joslyn,

The hardest thing for many is to rid ones self of perceived male conditioning.
You have made this step to speak to us here and for that you need to be pleased with yourself.
Secondly you need to look deep inside yourself in order to begin the process of materializing the true you whoever that may be.
Be well, be brave, walk forward.



Julia

MC-lite
05-21-2012, 05:11 PM
@Joslyn: Transitioning is not a punishment. It's a precious gift (believe it or not...)

We get to live two lives in the span of one lifetime.

We get to understand the mind, mindset, and the problems of being both male and female.

-and-

We learn what it truly means to love ourselves.

To make this journey, you need inner strength, courage, and patience. All of the qualities present in a natal female. Qualities that show themselves as they are put to the test.

Best of luck on the journey.

And remember: Love yourself.

:Miki.