A visit with my daughter.

[KatieZ]

I was at my daughters the other day and the kids were napping and her husband left to go over to his dads. So we sat and chatted for a couple hours about this and that. We got on the subject of her Mom and talked about her marital problems. I thought this would be a good opportunity to find out if she knew anything about my CDing in a subtle sort of way. So I asked her if her Mom ever told her anything about why her and I split up. She got quiet and looked away but said yes. So I asked her if she wanted to talk about it. She got real fidgitty and said no. I asked if talking about it made her uncomfortable and she said yes and she got up and said hey lets get the kids up and took off to roust them from their nap.

Well it is obvious she knows but isn't ready to talk so I let it go. Although the words crossdresser never came up I know she knows and must have known for some time. Her and I are still best buds right along so I know she isn't holding it against me.

I did tell her before I left that she should get on the internet and do some research and we should still talk sometime. If she does I hope she finds some reliable info and not the CD fantasy BS that is so prevelent. Wish I could figure out a way to direct her to some of the more informative sites with out making either one of us feel uncomfortable.

Any suggestions?


Hugs

[Dixie Darling]

Katie,

If you can get her to do so, have her access my web site and read some of the letters from wives and GF's there. There's also a ton of other information that might help break the ice for you.

Dixie -- http://www.geocities.com/senorita_cd

[Tiffy]

Katie, would you be able to send her a link via e-mail? Since you told her she should do some searching on the web. Atleast then there is no uncomfortable face to face. And if she does not bring it up to you later on then no harm no foul. Or she just might decide to talk. Just an idea. I hope you find one that works for you love.

Kisses, April

[RachelDenise]

Katie, I congratulate you on 2 counts. First to have the courage to talk to your daughter. Second, to have the brains not to force the issue. Well, done. Keep talking to her and keep the lines of communication open!

[Veronica E. Scott]

Good for you to have the courage to talk with your daughter at least you have opened the door.Hope everything works out well for you.

[Adrianne]

Hi Katiez, I hope your daughter do talk to you about crossdressing, but at least she has not shut you out of her life. I hope that it can come out one day but don't push it as it might push her away from you. I f she don't want to talk about let it go and keep everything as it is now where you are both great buds.

[TGMarla]

Hello, Katie. I think what Rachel Denise says is correct. It also brings to my mind the little impromptu poll I put on here concerning SO's. Surprisingly, the category with the most answers is "SO knows, is accepting". I'm not sure just what to make of that. I have found that most people really do NOT accept it. And here you have a wife that split up with you over your crossdressing, and also have a daughter who is so uncomfortable with the topic, she cannot discuss it with you. This has been my experience as well. The subject is such a taboo with people, they simply cannot discuss it. Were it to become known to all my friends, etc. that I crossdress, I would become a pariah with everyone I know. So I have a feeling that poll is not really in any way accurate. I hope that one day you will be able to be more open with your daughter. She probably feels that crossdressing has hurt her so badly due to your divorce from her mother, she cannot come to face it yet. But I'm glad your relationship with her is still alive and well.

[KatieZ]

She probably feels that crossdressing has hurt her so badly due to your divorce from her mother, she cannot come to face it yet.


Good point. Certainly something I need to take into consideration for how to proceed with this.
Thanx for that insight.



Hugs

[Andrea's Lynne]

Katie

I'm glad that you and your daughter have such a close relationship, and I hope you can both come to terms with this.

As for sending her out on the internet to research crossdressing, I'm a little leery. Typing "crossdressing" into Google will yield some rather pornographic results.........probably not what you mean to convey to her. I'd suggest finding some sites that deal openly and honestly with CDing and relationships and point her to those.

Good luck!

[CharleneCD]

Katie,

I have to agree with Rachael and Vonica. You had the courage to open up and let a discussion happen. You also showed her the patience to let her wait tilll she is ready.

Give her time. She may never talk to you about it but at least she is accepting enough not to be throwing it in your face.

Bravo for your courage and patience.

[Jenny Beth]

Since your daughter states that she would be uncomfortable to talk about it you could tell her that you are just as uncomfortable with the fact that you have not had a chance to explain yourself and don't want her to assume the worst so to speak. I've had to deal with exactly what you are going through and that's how I finally broke the ice on the subject. PM me if you want to chat.

[Marlena Dahlstrom]

Katie, I admire your courage in bringing up the subject. I think Jenny's right that it's a good idea to let your daughter know that you'd like to explain yourself. But as others have said, for whatever reason it doesn't sound like your daughter is in a place where she's comfortable listening.

So maybe the thing to do is to send her an email or letter explaining how you feel and links to resources such as Dixie's site. Letting her search for info herself does have a good risk she'll run across info that's not reflective of who you are -- in fact it's possible she might have already done this and it's one reason she's uncomfortable.