How did you decide who to tell?

[Brittany CD]

Yes, it's true, some friends of mine I went to high school with are aware that I do crossdress and are fine with it. It was easy to come out to them because I've always known they are tolerant of crossdressers but didn't come out for some reason, but we all did some crossdressing for fun a number of times for various reasons (theatre, costume parties, etc.)

Anyway, for those that are out, how did you decide who you would be able to tell? For me, I try to find out if someone is alright with crossdressers. For example, I was speaking with another friend of mine about this obvious crossdresser she saw at a club and I brought up the question of "you find crossdressing weird?" to find out.

Hope to hear your response!

By the way, my friend in the example said she's not against crossdressing, but she doesn't like people going out when they clearly don't pass. Looks like I may have someone to be a girl with ;)

[kimdl93]

I don't "look for people to tell". However, as I live my life, people I have chosen to tell have proven themselve to be open-minded, non-judgemental people that are part of my life on way or another.

[Kaz]

I guess it is a personality issue... For me it is not about 'who to tell'; it is about 'why to tell'... my wife said a while ago, in an angry moment, do the band know, why don't you tell them? And I think, why would they need to know? I know shed-loads of people... I do not need to know their sexual orientation and certainly not whether or not they are CD... this will not affect how I feel about them. It is so secondary it is not true! It is the person... 100%. I don't care how they want to present, what religion they prescribe to, what their sexual orientation is... we are all people, and isn't it great that we are all different?

[Miranda G]

I went through my phone book and whittled the names down, picked the one I was as close to sure about as possible to be, then waited till we were alone and I was drunk enough and told her.

My personal process in narrowing it down was that it had to be a girl, had to not be related to me, and was somebody I have always managed to converse naturally with about anything we've ever discussed. I had never previously dropped cross dressing hints to her to test the water but knew her to be a very tolerant and rather all round splendid person so was 99.9% certain she'd be fine with it and also be somebody I could turn to if I had any issue I wished to discuss, which she has been.

Here's to confidantes :)

[Cynthia Anne]

I really don't tell anyone! I figure if they see me out or come to my house they'll know! Hugs!

[TGMarla]

I decided NOT to bother telling anybody. It's none of their business.

[ReineD]

We've told friends who are gay or lesbian. And people who are friends/open-minded about the LGBT community. But, we're probably older than you (in our 50s). If one of my sons was a CDer, he'd probably have a lot more friends who would be OK with this than my SO's friends and peers. It's amazing how open-minded young people are even compared to 30 years ago. I think the internet changed everything.

[STACY B]

I really don't tell anyone! I figure if they see me out or come to my house they'll know! Hugs! Well if your a CD its different cuz you can go full bore one way then back again . But if your TS they will see the obvious changes an will know somethings not rite . But I had to tell my youngest daughter cuz she would see my shoes an clothes an didn;t put it together an would steal them ,,lol, So I said ,,,We have to talk ,,lol Ill buy you your own ,,DONT take mine , She was an is cool with it . But when someone says DAMMMMMMM you look like a girl ,,I say THANX ,, Its HELL but I try my best . An if they persist than I mite indulge if I feel like it .But most time they dont ,,They just walk away with there mouth open ,,An ponder what just happen ,,lol, CALGON take me awayyyyyyyyyy

[Eryn]

The question I ask is "Will that person's life be made better by knowing about Eryn?" So far that list is mighty short.

[trisha11]

I try to get a read on them just as you do. But I feel more comfortable talking or telling GG's then men.

[Jacqueline Winona]

Ah, an easy quesiton- I don't! :) I follow Eryn's test and really, other than my wife and members of the local support group (and all of you), I haven't mentioned it.