Summers Here

[Noemi]

Hello Ladies,

The weather is heating up here in the tri state area. This is the time of year I stop removing my body hair and painting my toes, you know, so when I wear shorts or go bare foot in the heat of summer I will not feel uncomfortable.

Life in the closet, it is hurting me tonight. Sorry to complain. I have been here on this forum for a little bit and read lots and lots, and I should just suck it up and live to dress another day. Or Woman up and take that next step towards coming out.....

I am confronted with this tonight and just wanted to share how I am feeling.

♥♥♥
Noemi

[Sophia Claire]

I completely understand how you feel. If I may offer this tidbit: When people ask me why I shaved my (fill in the blank), I tell them because my body hair gets frizzy and tangles when it gets hot and humid, and it's more comfortable to shave it than to trim. For me, this is true, but it could work for anybody. And if fibbing doesn't do anything for you, remember that some of the manliest men on the planet are shaven. Pro wrestlers not only shave, but wear mankinis for the whole world to see. As do bodybuilders. Swimmers.

But that's not really important. What's important is that if it's more comfortable to you, then go to town. Who cares what anyone else thinks? It's your body and you should not have to be afraid to do whatever you want to it.

Hugs,
Sophie

[Kylie4]

I know how you feel, except for me in the south it is summer from March to December.

[Noemi]

Thank you for your compassion, you all(cd'er.com) have been a great help to me. It is all in my head. If I think it through perhaps I can summon up the courage to be myself, sometimes I go to the store to buy make up and clothes. Those times I am at my strongest, and nothing really happens people do not care that much, except for my heart rate going up a few beats.

But my instincts also tell me to blend in as a man. I do not want to deal with being a cder tger or whatever so I want to just put the were closed sign up in the window for a while.....BUT all that does is get me into trouble with depression, it seems the further I run from Noemi the crazier I become.

[Eryn]

Noemi, I certainly feel your pain, but before you go too far check out the world around you. Lots of males are out there with minimal or no leg hair for a variety of reasons, and believe me nobody is questioning their motives.

With toes, I can't help you. I just keep my shoes on.

Hugs, Eryn

[Sophia Claire]

Thank you for your compassion, you all(cd'er.com) have been a great help to me. It is all in my head. If I think it through perhaps I can summon up the courage to be myself, sometimes I go to the store to buy make up and clothes. Those times I am at my strongest, and nothing really happens people do not care that much, except for my heart rate going up a few beats.

But my instincts also tell me to blend in as a man. I do not want to deal with being a cder tger or whatever so I want to just put the were closed sign up in the window for a while.....BUT all that does is get me into trouble with depression, it seems the further I run from Noemi the crazier I become.

well, we can't tell you what's best for you but whatever you decide to do, you know you have our support.

[Megan_Renee]

So I shave my legs and keep my toes painted. Neighbor asked about the legs and I told him that I preferred it that way. No more questions asked. Last night I saw a friend at the grocery store and she commented on my toes, "only women have painted toes." I asked her how she knew I wasn't a woman... :-)

On the flip side, we took a family trip out to the ocean over the weekend. Being clean shaven really made putting sunscreen on a lot easier. And the feel of the surf on clean legs was wonderful!

Having said all that, I have been where you are and know that it is a difficult place. ::hugs::

[Claire Cook]

Hi Noemi,

I used to feel the way you do -- shaved my legs only in the winter, (but rarely did my toenails). Now I'm shaved all of the time, wear shorts a lot and actually feel uncomfortable when my legs aren't smooth. ... and so far have never gotten flack from anyone. If you'll notice, there are men who don't have hairy legs -- either because they shave, or the hair is very light. So if you'll feel better doing it, go for it.

[BobbieBrooks]

Noemi,

I have found that having my legs shaven, no one as said anything. No one pays that much attention. I think we worry because WE know, our legs are shaved. Was at Lake Michigan sitting on a bench with the wife en drab to watch the sun go down and only one little girl noticed the bright red on my toes. Many Many people walked in front of us, and no one else noticed. If in doubt about when and where, just wear shoes and no toes will show!!! Have my come back ready if someone does say something about my toes, Looks better than than yellow fungus don't it? LOL

BobbieB

[Beth Mays]

we are in Desten/FWB FL. now.. I am shaved and have on clear polish fingers and toes.. and with me in Speedos on the beach..... No one really notices the shaved or the toes.
We have gone out to dinner every night with me in shorts, flip-flops... not one time has anyone give a 2nd look and you can bet my wife would notice!

[Kate Simmons]

That closet can seem pretty cramped when you miss out on a lot of the good stuff Hon.:)

[cyndigurl45]

"only women have painted toes." I asked her how she knew I wasn't a woman... :-)

::hugs::LOL I had something similar happen, bra's and a dressing room,

Me: I would like to try these on please

SA: why do you need bra's?

Me: Excuse me, why do YOU need a bra?

SA: I have boobs

Me: HELLO, pointing to my boobs

SA: only women have boobs

Me: How do you know I'm not a woman?

SA: OMG I'm so sorry........

[Laura912]

Noemi, you do need to be comfortable with what you do but we support you. Remember the line in our brain which Jess wrote about. If we were not CDers, we would not think twice about shaving whatever parts, but because we have this more or less secrete, we think everyone is thinking what we are thinking they are thinking about....you get the picture. Cindi, your story is a hoot!

[kimdl93]

Honestly, I doubt anyone will notice your shaved legs...and if they did, so what. As for painting your toes, its easy to remove, so why worry.

[Ally 2112]

I go though the same thing in the summers but the last couple of years i have shaved my chest and stomach and 2 peole have noticed .I told them it was genetics they seemed happy enough with that answer .So i do feel for ya because i would also like to shave all year round(my legs) but 1 step at a time :)

[DanielleP]

Heck, I do the opposite with shaving my legs, etc. I don't shave in the winter much but I shave every week or more often during the summer. Which reminds me of a time I forgot my toenails were painted - a bright red too! Went to the Doctor for a physical exam and he does look at every part of my body, including the toes. When he saw my nails he looked at me sort of quizzically - I shrugged and said my girlfriend and I got bored at the beach. Of course he could also easily see my bikini lines too - he didn't ask any more questions.

Shaving [whatever] is a personal choice and really says little about you and your desires IMO. Colored nails do raise more questions, but to each their own.

[Alaceann]

I don't worry about it , hair doesn't grow on my legs. I have to just shave 3 hairs off once a month.

[Jamie001]

When the weather gets warm, that is the time to ensure that body hair is removed and that you have a good pedicure with brightly painted toenails. You will feel much more comfortable with no leg hair.


Hello Ladies,

The weather is heating up here in the tri state area. This is the time of year I stop removing my body hair and painting my toes, you know, so when I wear shorts or go bare foot in the heat of summer I will not feel uncomfortable.

Life in the closet, it is hurting me tonight. Sorry to complain. I have been here on this forum for a little bit and read lots and lots, and I should just suck it up and live to dress another day. Or Woman up and take that next step towards coming out.....

I am confronted with this tonight and just wanted to share how I am feeling.

♥♥♥
Noemi

[Jamie001]

If you experience depression, then it is not worth it to run.


Thank you for your compassion, you all(cd'er.com) have been a great help to me. It is all in my head. If I think it through perhaps I can summon up the courage to be myself, sometimes I go to the store to buy make up and clothes. Those times I am at my strongest, and nothing really happens people do not care that much, except for my heart rate going up a few beats.

But my instincts also tell me to blend in as a man. I do not want to deal with being a cder tger or whatever so I want to just put the were closed sign up in the window for a while.....BUT all that does is get me into trouble with depression, it seems the further I run from Noemi the crazier I become.

[IngeInCO]

I shave my legs always. But I have taken off the toe paint, hmmm why? Insecurity I guess

[april_lynn]

I feel your pain Noemi. I too am sporting hairy legs and drab toes for summer because that was what I agreed to with my SO. She originally wanted my chest hair back too, but that made me really, really depressed so she has allowed me to keep my chest clean. I can't wait for fall though!

Hugs,
April

[Annie D]

Fall, winter, spring and summer I continue to shave my legs and have done so for the past 15 years and yes, in the DFW area, shorts can be worn year round. My toes are painted pretty much year round as well and when I have the need to go without socks and something somewhat summery as a male, I wear Crocs. The is not an endorsement, well, yes it is, because they have a strap across the back to secure them to my foot, the forfoot has holes to let my puppies breath and across the toe area it is solid so no one can see the color of my polish. By the way, I have several, embarrassing so, pairs of different colored sandals that I coordinate with my outfit. A girl can't stay in hiding all the time!

[Xrys]

My mother knows I shave, but she doesnt know the rest yet. Out here in AZ it gets hot. I wear shorts most of the year, and shave all year. Nobody has noticed or cares out here. I also know a lot of macho guys here that shave their bodies in the summer so they look good in trunks and a tan. I know a couple who get brazilian wax, and they dont dress at all, they just want to look good in their animal print speedos. Personally I find body hair disgusting on anybody, but then again I am a bit wierd.

[Janet Miller]

Hi Noemi,

That is so sad. I understand why you don't shave your legs and paint your toes in the summer, but for me, summer is the time to show a little more skin. I love to wear nail polish in the pastels of summer to match a top or a sun dress and I just love to wear espadrilles. They are so comfy and I love the look. Maybe you could just wear slacks and loafers until you can dress up in a more secluded or private setting.

Any way, I just wanted you to know that I completely understand how you are feeling.

Hugs,

Janet

[Jamie001]

I don't understand why we give our wives control over our leg hair. It is our body and many men shave and don't have hair - just look at body builders - they all shave their bodies. Why do we feel that we need to ask permission? Do our wives ask for our permission when they change aspects of their appearance? (rhetorical question).


I feel your pain Noemi. I too am sporting hairy legs and drab toes for summer because that was what I agreed to with my SO. She originally wanted my chest hair back too, but that made me really, really depressed so she has allowed me to keep my chest clean. I can't wait for fall though!

Hugs,
April

[Cheryl T]

Before you go all Sasquatch why not try wearing a pair of shorts out and see what reaction you get from people....it might just change your mind.

[GingerLeigh]

I felt the same way earlier this year. I simply bit the bullet and went out with my legs shaved anyway. Sure people look, but who cares. You get used to the looks. I only had one person ask why I did it, and I asked him why he noticed a man's legs in the first place. Really, it's my body, my hair and my choice.

If you must give reasons, say that you don't like how it feels when the breeze blows on the hairs on your legs. It makes you think mosquitoes are landing on you. Or just say you like it that way and leave it at that. What business is it of theirs anyhow?

[Foxglove]

Hi, Noemi! I have the solution to your problem: move to Ireland. We don't have summer here. Today, e.g., the expected high in my area is 13 degrees Celsius, 55 degrees Fahrenheit. It's also raining off and on. This isn't at all atypical of June days. Or July or August for that matter.

Summer is the subject of various jokes in Ireland. E.g.,

"My two favorite days of the year: Christmas and summer."

Or, "Do you remember summer last year?" "Yeah, it fell on a Wednesday, didn't it?"

So I have the opposite problem here. All the pretty little spring and summer dresses you see in the shops--I don't know who buys them, but I don't, because I'd never get the chance to wear them. It's never warm enough.

As for settling in Ireland, you shouldn't have any legal problems. Just as we don't have summer in this country, officially we don't have TG people, either. The law doesn't recognize our existence. So when you land at the airport and somebody asks for your passport, visa, etc., just say, "I'm TG. I don't exist. You haven't seen me."

Best wishes, Annabelle

[Noemi]

So I am reading all your replies, thank you. I am still on the fence, but am leaning towards hairless. It really upset me this year, usually I can just partition my mind and that is that....
Going to price some epilator's tonight.
I hate to say these things here and would like to live in the illusion that I so fem, but I am not. I feel it would be noticed allot if I wore shorts since I have dark and dense arm hair(sob). My mind is another story, there I am a woman.

I work in some conservative places too, I could just not wear shorts this summer....

Thanks again for the responses, you girls make me feel better, and I feel like I am part of something for once.

♥♥♥
Noemi

[Jorja]

Girl, get that razor out and get clean! Nobody cares. If anyone asks simply say " that's the way I like it uh huh uh huh". :)

[Rachel87]

I understand it can be hard. People will misunderstand if we show feminine traits, but remaining in the closet was too hard for me, I really felt depressed. I was getting ready for summer, which is pretty long here in Cali. Last time i shaved was 2 or 3 months ago. I have a lot of hair on my leg, so the appearance difference is huge. I was fortunate to have no hair on my chest though.

No only summer is here, but I have a planned visit to my parents in 2 weeks. AND I'm currently living with my brother. I've been hating this whole situation for long enough that I couldn't take it anymore, so I decided to do what I want, so I put those razors to work. Shaved legs are not that feminine these days, as many pointed out, men shave legs for several manly reasons, which makes it easier to get away with (although none of those reasons can be applied to me).

At first I feel scared, I was wearing pants all the time even in this hot weather, but today I went to the gym wearing shorts. Before changing, I carefully looked around to see if there was someone known in the gym. There was no one there, so I carried on with my plan. Stepped on a treadmill, and I must say that the feeling of running wearing shorts with smooth legs is sooo good. I was loving it. But 15 minutes later my brother showed up at the gym, which was very unusual for him to show up at that time. I was a bit surprised, but I knew it might happen. I almost panicked, but I just kept doing what I was doing.

Later on I was doing some abs and he came to me and said something, but I was listening to music on earphones so I couldn't hear him. I was so scared he said something about my legs (it is very hairy usually and very white so it is very hard not to notice it is shaved) that I didn't dare to ask him to repeat, so I just pretended I didn't notice him. Until now, he didn't say anything about my legs, it is possible he didn't notice it, I'm not sure. I hope he didn't notice it, because the silence about it just kills me. I will try not to show it up too much still, but I'm happy overall. But the final boss will be my parents visit. I'm not really afraid if they find out, I just hope things don't go too bad.

-Rachel

[KellyJameson]

Hi Noemi

Last summer I noticed my friends husband had small white dots where the skin would not tan on his legs. Everyone has yeast living on their skin and sometimes this yeast will grow out of control and affect the Melanin in the skin cells so the skin does not tan like the surrounding area does. He shaved his legs so when he applied the ointment it would better absorb into his skin.

We were talking about it because he assumed I had no hair on my legs for the same reason and I did not contradict him.

Very few people would argue with a medical condition if you want to feel safe from being judged or dealing with open hostility and it will not be long before you forget all about being self conscious. I cannot imagine having hair on my body, the feel of it would absolutely disgust me.

[Jamie001]

We should never make excuses for having hairless legs or painted nails. Just tell folks that you like having hairless legs and/or painted nails. It is not their business.

[Noemi]

Well I am home baking gourmet CC cookies for my Dad. Kind of a tradition, I bake him stuff, but only on special occasions like Fathers day.

I must report that after considerable trepidation, I was in the shower this evening, and as if by magic my body got shaved clean(well I did it, my razor was right there, silly). And I feel like me again. Oh the dark cloud has lifted, my skirt feels so nice against my smooth legs....plus I ordered a new epilator....

Really it is confusing enough to me being what I am. It helps to feel feminine, and smooth skin is a must to feel...oh my cookies are beeping.
Thanks again for sharing with me it really helps.

♥♥♥
Noemi

[Rebecca W.]

We should never make excuses for having hairless legs or painted nails. Just tell folks that you like having hairless legs and/or painted nails. It is not their business.

I'm with you, lets let go of all the excuses and be happy being free of all the ugly hair! Who ever said that it is a specific thing that "only" women shave their legs and the other areas? We shave our faces and so what would be wrong to continue with the rest? I shave all of the time now and it is the best feeling for me to be free of the coarse hair. One other benfit for me at least is that I can find ticks in a second while outdoors, and for me it more than worth it.
I tend to worry too much about what other people think and it is about time to worry about what I am missing out on by not doing what I want to do. I do a lot of cycling and the air flowing over my legs is incredible.:o

P.S. If it is good enough for Lance Armstrong then why not for me???

[WifeofWrenchette]

Hi Noemi,

My husband shaves his legs all the time and wears shorts. Sometimes nail polish. Right now he has on pink sparkles on his toes. Anyway, in the past 6 years no one has even asked him about it or commented on it. Swimmers and other athletes shave their legs all the time. I say go for it and don't worry so much.