Sex with men as Crossdressing girl

[EmilyWa]

I got this question, from a few of my Cd girls friend, wondering about my sex life ? Do i have sex with men in Crossdress or when i dressup as Emily, Answer is YES !
and i have some tip for any girls who might want to try any sexual actions with guy!
1. Honesty : You must be honest to the person you going to have sex with that you are Crossdress, many guys have an fantasy of a girl with a dick.
2.Looking for someone who have an Open mind about SEX>
3. Make sure ( MUST ) that your makeup done right, Your wig are tight and not going to fallout during the sexual activity : )
4. Shave all of your Facial hair and body hair.
5 Use Condom ( MUST )
* If guys wanted to have sex with you doesn't mean he love you or he might but the most important is you and him enjoy the moment....

EmilyWa

[ReineD]

I hope you're being careful.

Have a look at this Video "Middle Sexes: Redefining He and She" (Part 1 of 6), specifically from about 2:00 - 7:00.

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Although it might be safer in your country, it definitely isn't in the US and Canada, and I dare say also the UK and Australia, although someone might correct me on this.

[EmilyWa]

I am really careful about this, Some guys are good some are bad, Look for one that have an open mind! I never have sex with a guy in the first date...And i think Thailand are safer in that way.

[Mythic]

You are very cute. I'm quite jealous. An be careful! ;P
Actually good advice for those who are curious.

[EmilyWa]

Iis Very important that CD girls being HONEST to a guy before into any Actions and have both understanding about What is Crossdressing ?

[celeste26]

It is a good way to get killed in my book, although it might just be a nice fantasy.

[whowhatwhen]

It is a good way to get killed in my book, although it might just be a nice fantasy.

I think women in general have to worry about that regardless.

[ReineD]

I am really careful about this, Some guys are good some are bad, Look for one that have an open mind! I never have sex with a guy in the first date...And i think Thailand are safer in that way.


Iis Very important that CD girls being HONEST to a guy before into any Actions and have both understanding about What is Crossdressing ?

Did you watch the video, Emily?

I'm suggesting this because most of our members don't live in Thailand. They live in parts of the world where it is dangerous to do this. Although I'm sure you are wanting to be helpful, the rules of engagement are different for most people here and you should really familiarize yourself with this.

[EmilyWa]

I have watched the Video and i do understand that many parts of the world are not safe for CD girls, I have been so many place around the world and i do familiarize with the dangerous, My point is IF that Cd girl really thinks of going into any sexual action with any guys, She must be Smart and Careful, That why i said Be honest to the guy and to herself, Don't lie, Many times when i see Cr girls gets kill by a guy because she have not be honest to the guy that She is a Crossdressing girl but a real girl.
also looks for the guys who have an Open mind, Am not trying to tell anyone YOU SHOULD GO OUT AND HAVE SEX WITH GUYS... But it do happens ! If it happen what Cd girls should do !
Sex is a part of human nature.

Not all guys hate and wanted to kill CD girls, Be smart with someone you wants to go on a date!

[ReineD]

It's nice to not lie Emily, I'm all for honesty as well.

But around these parts there are homophobic men who will beat up or kill a beautiful transwoman just because they are attracted to her (and they don't want to admit it to themselves). She can be the most honest person in the world and it will make no difference. Just knowing that she's trans puts her in grave danger of dire consequences, if she's around the wrong type of people.

And you never really know how someone feels until it's too late.

But, if you're suggesting she go into a tranny bar that is filled with men who are actually looking to have sex with trannies, it's a different matter. She would be safe (providing she protects herself against sexual diseases). But then everyone would know she's a tranny anyway, simply by virtue of being there.

[max]

Thanks for enlightening us about these topics Emily!

I'm sorry that so many posters have come to this thread to be judgmental.

[ReineD]

It's not being judgmental, max. It's being realistic. Fantasies are nice and all, but they don't do anyone any good if they lead some poor soul who doesn't live in Thailand into dangerous situations.

You should read the news, and also have a look at the video I posted. This is Part 1. There are also Parts 2 to 6 on youtube. It's a video about non-binary gender (it's very good) and at the end of the video they also discuss recent studies that confirm that homophobic men (who are most apt to engage in violence against gays or trans), are most attracted to them. In other words, these men repress their own feelings of being gay by engaging in hatred against gays and transwomen.

[Lorenqt]

I got this question, from a few of my Cd girls friend, wondering about my sex life ? Do i have sex with men in Crossdress or when i dressup as Emily, Answer is YES !
and i have some tip for any girls who might want to try any sexual actions with guy!
1. Honesty : You must be honest to the person you going to have sex with that you are Crossdress, many guys have an fantasy of a girl with a dick.
2.Looking for someone who have an Open mind about SEX>
3. Make sure ( MUST ) that your makeup done right, Your wig are tight and not going to fallout during the sexual activity : )
4. Shave all of your Facial hair and body hair.
5 Use Condom ( MUST )
* If guys wanted to have sex with you doesn't mean he love you or he might but the most important is you and him enjoy the moment....

EmilyWa

I always make sure that the guy knows that I'm not a real girl, before any cloths come off. You can't just simply assume, because he may not. (Most guys are thinking about how to "crack my thong", not what they might find.) Trust me, some guys can take it very badly. Even if the guy might be into special girls, he may be concerned about what his friends may think and still be violent. So make sure that he knows. I'm not saying just walk up to a guy and say, "Hi, my name is _____ and I have a penis.":eek: There's no shame in letting him buy you a couple of drinks (if you're in a bar setting) or some harmless flirtation.

Always use a condom.

Most guys (at least most of the ones I've been with) don't want a relationship, they just want sex. They just see me as a dirty fantasy or some kind of sex toy. I'm usually okay with that, because while they're using me to live out their forbidden fantasy (you do not want to know what goes through some of these guys' minds), I'm using them to scratch that special itch.;) So, don't get upset if he doesn't call you the next day (or week or month or year).

[max]

I do understand the need to be safe; ReineD maybe you didn't intend to be judgmental, but that is how the posts made me feel.

I did watch all 6 parts of that series, they were very interesting although as I have done a lot of reading I had seen a lot of the topics before. They could have probably done an entire documentary on how the ladies from the Calypso self-identified. That would have been very interesting. I would have liked to have heard their stories.

[Vickie_CDTV]

It is one thing to be with a guy you know, but total strangers is really taking one heck of a risk. I am a fairly large male and I wouldn't even meet a GG I just met (and having no idea of her background whatsoever), then go somewhere private and put myself in a vulnerable situation (in the very least I could be set up for a robbery.) I admit it would be very tempting, but it just isn't safe for anyone to do that, even a male going with a GG. You just never know what mental state a complete stranger is, and even if they don't rob, rape or kill you, how does one know if they will respect one's limits, or respect one's decision to say "no"?

Renee is right, take it from a GG. If GGs at large would be reluctant to do something, trans should probably be also.

[Shananigans]

I guess intimacy with a stranger can always be a roll of the dice with safety.

I feel I am over safe...a guy basically has to speak Russian and grow feathers to convince me that he's something suitable to consider bringing home.

My standards have never let me down. ;)

I think it's good to stress honesty though...I mean, I think of sex is the name of the game, it should be pretty clear and that some things may be a tad bit different.

Welcome to the forum though! I haven't seen you here before!

[Sophia Claire]

I think women in general have to worry about that regardless.

I think that's probably about 25% of the reason sex is so hard to come by, despite the fact that women obviously enjoy it as much as men (when it's done right).

[Shananigans]

I think that's probably about 25% of the reason sex is so hard to come by, despite the fact that women obviously enjoy it as much as men (when it's done right).

Yes, this is part of it. I know I was brought up to protect myself and be cautious. I love sex....I can't wait to be with my beautiful SO tomorrow....but, I have to have like romance and all that crap to really feel the sexual moment. Therefore, strangers don't do it so much for me. I'm kind of a girl about sex when it all boils down to it. :( And, now that I've had mind-melting, earth-shattering, toe clinching ecstasy because of someone I love...no other persons stands a chance. A lot of girls are kooky for that...and ,not to be your knotch on your headboard. So, it might be different cognitive thought processed on intimacy between genders.

[CINDYO]

gg's have a different take on sex and intimacy. Males, no matter how they are dressed, that is people with the XY chromosomes are wired differently then those with the XX chromosomes.

[susmitha]

i have recently got a call from a man to be his gf. he has agreed that he will treat me as a lady and wants sex too. i have not yet decided.

[Alice Torn]

A few guys want to meet me now, too. I have only met one time before. No violence, and no penetration. He did not want to meet me again. I always am honest, that i am a cd/ Considering meeting another guy, after setting boundries. Always a fear factor, though.

[Stephenie S]

This is SUCH an important topic and I am quite impressed to see that it has not been banned on what I consider to be a fairly prudish and "up tight" forum.

Kudos to CD.com!!

Crossdressers and TG women are regularly beaten and sometimes killed just because they ran into a homophobic male. And in my book, MOST men are incredibly homophobic. PLEASE do be careful out there. No matter how nice a man may seem, the mixture of alcohol and testosterone can often be fatal.

[Nigella]

This is SUCH an important topic and I am quite impressed to see that it has not been banned on what I consider to be a fairly prudish and "up tight" forum.

Kudos to CD.com!!

You consider us prudish and "up tight" because we protect our members from the sleeze normally associated with the term crossdresser. We do allow most topics to be discussed, however, some members want to take the level of the topic to a point that is not acceptable, it is at that point that threads get closed. To put it quite simply keep it "family friendly" and it will stay.

[Youkje]

Stephenie is right. Most people in my country are quite supportive with gay people, trannies and all the other stuff. But usually when stuff like that is on the news the suspect allways seems to be someone with religious views (Well, I didn't hear it a lot about CDers but it's mostly against homosexual people). So yeah you really have to be carefull with that stuff.

[Sally24]

I love sex....I can't wait to be with my beautiful SO tomorrow....but, I have to have like romance and all that crap to really feel the sexual moment....... And, now that I've had mind-melting, earth-shattering, toe clinching ecstasy because of someone I love...no other persons stands a chance. A lot of girls are kooky for that....

I love how this expresses how things can be between 2 people in love. Can't wait for my wife to get home! And many guys are kooky for that too.:battingeyelashes:

[Janet77]

I'm not into sex with strangers, but I have to say, any man who gets to be with you is a very lucky man indeed....:battingeyelashes:

[TeresaL]

My SO needs to read this thread. Then she will super glue me to the bed (upside down), Saran-wrap me, and leave me to die. Maybe she is right. CDing leads to homosexuality, promiscuity or prostitution, free or for sale.

Hemophilia is strong and prolific in the US, and CDing is not acceptable. Many of us are confined to our home. Yes, it resembles house arrest, just for donning the opposite sex's garments. Our wife's are in shambles trying to come to terms with the thought that their husbands are wearing women's clothes.

FAB or not, I can't suggest that she gets on board when this type of topic is allowed. Threads like this are exclusive of the hetero CD community.

Thanks for the family forum support concept.

[whowhatwhen]

My SO needs to read this thread. Then she will super glue me to the bed (upside down), Saran-wrap me, and leave me to die. Maybe she is right. CDing leads to homosexuality, promiscuity or prostitution, free or for sale.

Hemophilia is strong and prolific in the US, and CDing is not acceptable. Many of us are confined to our home. Yes, it resembles house arrest, just for donning the opposite sex's garments. Our wife's are in shambles trying to come to terms with the thought that their husbands are wearing women's clothes.

FAB or not, I can't suggest that she gets on board when this type of topic is allowed. Threads like this are exclusive of the hetero CD community.

Thanks for the family forum support concept.

I'm sorry that people cannot accept the fact that gay and bisexual transgender people exist, clearly we must sweep them under the rug as to not offend anyone.
Gay and bi crossdressers are going to have sex, there is nothing wrong with discussing safety and the other issues they face when meeting men.

So far this topic has been squeeky clean, why should we close it to appease people who should do more research than reading one thread and making broad assumptions?

[EmilyWa]

I am agree with you,I wrote this topic because i wants us to thinks about it carefully and safety before any of us gone out to meet someone or even gone out dressing as a Girl....
The world should must know that we Crossdresser lady are exit, We smart, well living and any Asshole have no right to hate our feeling or kill us.

[ReineD]

This is SUCH an important topic and I am quite impressed to see that it has not been banned on what I consider to be a fairly prudish and "up tight" forum.

Kudos to CD.com!!

To echo Nigella, the forum has never been prudish or uptight. But we do differentiate between an honest discussion about aspects of the crossdressing for some people (the majority of CDers are not attracted to men), and members wanting to use this place as a titillating fantasy outlet, "Hey, let's talk about the eroticism of having sex with men and see how far we can go ... then maybe we can all meet in a webcam chatroom somewhere". Or, "I want to tell everyone about my sexual experiences, so I'll start a thread telling everyone how wonderful it is to have sex with men, and not talk about the dangers associated with this in many parts of the world.



FAB or not, I can't suggest that she gets on board when this type of topic is allowed. Threads like this are exclusive of the hetero CD community.

Thanks for the family forum support concept.

Your wife needs to know there are male-attracted CDers just as there are male-attracted non-CDers. She also needs to know that a lot of CDers behave differently online than they do offline. They enjoy fantasizing about it (just like non-CDers enjoy fantasizing about all kinds of scenarios that don't involve their wives) ... in other words, it's just a fantasy. Men are sexual creatures and I'm sure this would not be a surprise to her.

We do keep it clean here but at the same time we don't pretend it doesn't exist. The CDing community is just as diverse in sexual expression as is the general populace. Also, the vast majority of threads here are not about sex and having sex with men, and we have quite a few threads from CDers who say that having sex with men is DEFINITELY not for them.

So, the onus would be upon you to tell your wife where you sit with all of this so that she wouldn't read threads like this one and assume that you want to have sex with men just because a few people in this thread have responded that they do.

It might not hurt to also point out to your wife that it is the men who do want to have sex with other men, who will be the most prolific with their posts here. CDers like you or my SO and countess others usually don't post in threads like this one since it holds no interest for them. And you don't see the hetero CDers often start threads that say, "Hey, isn't having sex with men gross?" LOL But just look at the forum numbers. We have 7,000 active participants (who have logged in in the past 3 months), and only a handful of threads such as this one. Even then, only a few people actually post that they do have sex with men. So please do try to help your wife keep it in perspective if she ever decides to visit this board.


Stephenie is right. Most people in my country are quite supportive with gay people, trannies and all the other stuff. But usually when stuff like that is on the news the suspect allways seems to be someone with religious views (Well, I didn't hear it a lot about CDers but it's mostly against homosexual people). So yeah you really have to be carefull with that stuff.

I know that things are pretty bad in North America, but I wasn't sure about Europe. Thanks for confirming there are safety issues even in the Netherlands.

[kellycan27]

My SO needs to read this thread. Then she will super glue me to the bed (upside down), Saran-wrap me, and leave me to die. Maybe she is right. CDing leads to homosexuality, promiscuity or prostitution, free or for sale.

Hemophilia is strong and prolific in the US, and CDing is not acceptable. Many of us are confined to our home. Yes, it resembles house arrest, just for donning the opposite sex's garments. Our wife's are in shambles trying to come to terms with the thought that their husbands are wearing women's clothes.

FAB or not, I can't suggest that she gets on board when this type of topic is allowed. Threads like this are exclusive of the hetero CD community.

Thanks for the family forum support concept.

I think that just maybe the homophobe who is keeping that is forcing you to be confined under house arrest...... is you. Your attitude is scary..... kinda of makes sense out of what some people here are warning people to be wary of. Kind of ironic wouldn't you say? Judging from some of your past posts I am not really surprised that you wouldn't suggest that your wife "be on board" for this subject, or any other cross dressing subject since according to you she doesn't share your affinity for cross dressing.
It always ( well used to) amazes me when people complain about repression, yet they have no problem repressing others.

[seanmuscle]

It's nice to not lie Emily, I'm all for honesty as well.

But around these parts there are homophobic men who will beat up or kill a beautiful transwoman just because they are attracted to her (and they don't want to admit it to themselves). She can be the most honest person in the world and it will make no difference. Just knowing that she's trans puts her in grave danger of dire consequences, if she's around the wrong type of people.

And you never really know how someone feels until it's too late.

But, if you're suggesting she go into a tranny bar that is filled with men who are actually looking to have sex with trannies, it's a different matter. She would be safe (providing she protects herself against sexual diseases). But then everyone would know she's a tranny anyway, simply by virtue of being there.

I think a lot of gg try to shut down the idea of men dating crossdressers because its competition and ruins the idea that their husband never thinks about men

[Nigella]

I think a lot of gg try to shut down the idea of men dating crossdressers because its competition and ruins the idea that their husband never thinks about men

Do you honestly believe that a Genetic Woman is going to see competition in a Genetic Male wearing female clothing, get your head out the sand and read some of the comments made on this subject by the GGs on this forum.

[whowhatwhen]

I think a lot of gg try to shut down the idea of men dating crossdressers because its competition and ruins the idea that their husband never thinks about men

A straight crossdresser won't think about men.

[Youkje]

I know that things are pretty bad in North America, but I wasn't sure about Europe. Thanks for confirming there are safety issues even in the Netherlands.

Well it's not extremely bad. I just hear it once a month on the news coming by.
I just tought of it, becuase when people get that I CD the first question they ask is if I'm gay. And a lot of people seem to relate CDing to being gay. Wich is not allways the case for a cding person.
But it's not like they kill you for it here, they tend to beat people up. But usually the police get them sooner or later.

[Sandra]

FAB or not, I can't suggest that she gets on board when this type of topic is allowed. Threads like this are exclusive of the hetero CD community.

Thanks for the family forum support concept.


Like it or not this does happen, and this thread is well within the rules. We are adults and I'm sorry but GGs have to realise that these things are discussed. If they then have a problem then they should go and talk to their SO's about it.

Another thing you might want to think about is IMHO 90% of cders that say they either have been with a man or want to be with one, are either in fantasty land or jumping on the bandwagon.

[ReineD]

I think a lot of gg try to shut down the idea of men dating crossdressers because its competition and ruins the idea that their husband never thinks about men

:lol: Honestly Sean, your single-mindedness makes me laugh.

Assuming you are referring to me (since I'm the one who waxed caution in this thread), people in this forum know that I'm broad-minded indeed, and I don't have to disclose my bedroom exploits to prove it. :p But at the same time, I'm a realist. And do you know why I zero in on the BS? Because I think it's important for people to get past all the noise (the fantasy), to discover and honor who they really are. I cut through a lot of noise in my own life and I know today how important self-honestly is to reaching one's full potential as a human being, which then translates into having rich and rewarding relationships with others.

Admittedly, I do annoy people who just want to come here to fantasize. :p

[Mythic]

My SO needs to read this thread. Then she will super glue me to the bed (upside down), Saran-wrap me, and leave me to die. Maybe she is right. CDing leads to homosexuality, promiscuity or prostitution, free or for sale.

Hemophilia is strong and prolific in the US, and CDing is not acceptable. Many of us are confined to our home. Yes, it resembles house arrest, just for donning the opposite sex's garments. Our wife's are in shambles trying to come to terms with the thought that their husbands are wearing women's clothes.

FAB or not, I can't suggest that she gets on board when this type of topic is allowed. Threads like this are exclusive of the hetero CD community.

Thanks for the family forum support concept.

Topics like this don't come along often. And we are all adults here. We can discuss issues like this without them getting out of hand. And crossdressing does not affect which way your door swings. If you're straight then your wife needs to understand that.

[LisaMallon]

The various studies that have been done on this are very clear, 'true' sexual orientation of CDs (in particular) remain the same whatever mode they are in.
Sexual behaviour though, can appear to change to an outsider.
But this is simply a case of someone who has bi-sexual tendencies anyway who feels more able to express them in 'female' mode, but they were there anyway.

Remember that sexuality, like gender, is far more of a continuum than current western society thinks. It is not a black/white thing, "you are either this or that".
Rather that you have extreme ends of sexuality with a lot more people in the 'grey' area. How you actually behave depends on the environment and situation.

For example, many adolescent males and females have a 'bi-sexual' period when growing up, with some real (or imagined) sexual experiences with the same sex. This is very common.
Then it stabilises into a single orientation, but that is as much to do with the environment as anything else.

To answer the question of "does CDing make you gay", no it doesn't, in fact it can't.
But, if you have some bi-sexual tendencies which have been there all the time, then you might express them in a certain situation that is more probable to occur when you are 'en-femme'.

Sadly the world is full of homophobes that themselves have bi-sexual tendencies.
This largely comes from trying to deal with this by wanting to eliminate all other expressions of sexuality, basically because they want to remove temptation from themselves.
They think that if there is zero public expression and zero discussion, then they wont have these terrible wicked thoughts. Nonsense of course.

The endless stream of people being caught out doing something 'gay', after a long life of being strongly (and in the case of politicians or priests, very publicly) 'anti-gay' is almost comical.

Not so comical are the gay bashers, which are an extreme form of this.
Again many have been proven to have bi-sexual tendencies, expressing self disgust by beating up someone else.
My advice to them is if you really are so against this, then bash yourself.

As for the rest of us, have fun doing what you like as long as it doesn't "scare the horses" and you take obvious precautions.
The world and life can be pretty crappy, I see absolutely no good reason why consenting adults shouldn't have a bit of fun now and then, doing whatever rings their personal bells.

[seanmuscle]

I think that just maybe the homophobe who is keeping that is forcing you to be confined under house arrest...... is you. Your attitude is scary..... kinda of makes sense out of what some people here are warning people to be wary of. Kind of ironic wouldn't you say? Judging from some of your past posts I am not really surprised that you wouldn't suggest that your wife "be on board" for this subject, or any other cross dressing subject since according to you she doesn't share your affinity for cross dressing.
It always ( well used to) amazes me when people complain about repression, yet they have no problem repressing others.

I agree with Kelly. She is every mans dream girl. We need open attitude for CD dating men and wanting to explore dating with men

[whowhatwhen]

I assume you'd have no problem going out with a CD in male mode then?
What about sex in male mode?
Public displays of affection in male mode?

[Brittany CD]

I agree with Reine that it can be dangerous. But I'm also confused about the condom part if it's two guys

[Mythic]

To protect against diseases Katiegal.

[Nigella]

Katie, condoms are not just to prevent unwanted children, but also help protect against STIs

[whowhatwhen]

I agree with Reine that it can be dangerous. But I'm also confused about the condom part if it's two guys

Basically, anal sex can cause tiny tears in the lining of the rectum through which HIV could enter the body.
Well, that and other STDs as well.

[kellycan27]

A straight crossdresser won't think about men.

Huh? Really? What about all the proclaimed "straight" cross dressers who think or fantasize about being "treated like a woman" by a man.... while dressed? The topic has been the subject of quite a few threads in the 4 years that I have been a member here.. Are you implying that these str8 guys are being less than candid?:heehee:

[TeresaL]

Ok, I stand checked. My post is wishful thinking, and represents my feeble (errant?) attempt to guard and maintain Teresa's existence. Maybe I went overboard, and in no means do I want to be condescending to gay crossdressers. Their acceptance is just as vital and important as any cause of mine.

We are a diverse group, and difference of opinion cannot be avoided. I wish that a section for straight crossdressers existed, but It was discussed previously and may be too exclusive.


Topics like this don't come along often. And we are all adults here. We can discuss issues like this without them getting out of hand. And crossdressing does not affect which way your door swings. If you're straight then your wife needs to understand that.

[whowhatwhen]

Huh? Really? What about all the proclaimed "straight" cross dressers who think or fantasize about being "treated like a woman" by a man.... while dressed? The topic has been the subject of quite a few threads in the 4 years that I have been a member here.. Are you implying that these str8 guys are being less than candid?:heehee:

I don't blame them for fantasizing, some guys are really, really hot.
;)

I would say that some are at least curious though, and would think that in the year 2012 safe experimentation is perfectly fine.

...I will admit to being jealous of the GGs, CDs, and gay guys who can be with guys in that way though, penetrative sex will remain as a fantasy to me for physical reasons unfortunately.
Enjoy and be safe I say!

[LisaMallon]

Teresa the vast majority are 'straight', or more accurately, have a very low bi-sexual quotient. But some have a higher level and/or are more prepared to (at least) think about it, perhaps even experiment a bit.

Some find they enjoy it and then it might become a bit more of their overall sexual play, even if it is only a small part. Others find that there can be a world of difference between fantasy and reality and decide "that's not for me" after dipping their toes in the water, so to speak.

But those already had those tendencies before, just that doing it while CDing may make it easier psychologically.
Or simply easier to find a partner of course, you may have your personal desires, but it takes 2 (or 3 or 4 ...) to tango and you've got to find someone else to play.

I wouldn't worry about. No big deal on preferring tea to coffee, or coffee to tea, or being a lifelong tea drinker that likes the odd cup of coffee now and then.

[ReineD]

Huh? Really? What about all the proclaimed "straight" cross dressers who think or fantasize about being "treated like a woman" by a man.... while dressed?

Then they're not straight, if they try it and enjoy it. If they try and it grosses them out, they'll know their erotic feelings come from a desire to enhance their femininity (autogynephilia: the love of oneself as a woman), more than an attraction to men.

This is what I question: the single CDers who are content staying at the fantasy stage. This would drive me crazy! lol. What I'm about to say does not apply to TSs but if I were a M2F CDer, I would most definitely experiment to see if my experience as a male-bodied individual with another male-bodied individual would float my boat. I understand the married CDers not wanting to do this, but honestly if they are married they have no business fantasizing about anyone male or female other than their spouse, do they. Much better to work on improving a sex life with the existing spouse. :)

[Kate Simmons]

I don't have a problem with anything you are saying Emily if two people have genuine loving feelings towards each other. How do I know this? From experience Hon.:)

[Vickie_CDTV]

Basically, anal sex can cause tiny tears in the lining of the rectum through which HIV could enter the body.
Well, that and other STDs as well.

They are also necessary for oral sex as well (and a similar barrier is needed when done on someone with a vagina.) Diseases are also spread via mouth to genital contact. (I mention this because I am shocked by how many people I have met over the years who did not know a condom or barrier is necessary for oral sex and didn't know there was a risk involved with it.)

[Momarie]

I think a lot of gg try to shut down the idea of men dating crossdressers because its competition and ruins the idea that their husband never thinks about men

Yes Sean, that's it.
Competition?
Hardly...

[kellycan27]

Then they're not straight, if they try it and enjoy it. If they try and it grosses them out, they'll know their erotic feelings come from a desire to enhance their femininity (autogynephilia: the love of oneself as a woman), more than an attraction to men.

This is what I question: the single CDers who are content staying at the fantasy stage. This would drive me crazy! lol. What I'm about to say does not apply to TSs but if I were a M2F CDer, I would most definitely experiment to see if my experience as a male-bodied individual with another male-bodied individual would float my boat. I understand the married CDers not wanting to do this, but honestly if they are married they have no business fantasizing about anyone male or female other than their spouse, do they. Much better to work on improving a sex life with the existing spouse. :)

I was merely addressing the statement that "straight cross dressers... don't think about men". I am not even going to comment on someone's sexual orientation or proclivities. I will however agree that "safety" should always be number one on the list when it comes to sexual encounters.

kel

[rita63]

I had sex with a man as a man many years ago for about 2 years and I enjoyed it. If he had accepted me wearing panties to bed we probably would have had a much longer relationship. I would probably have sex again with the right man or another CD or a special woman. The point is to care about each other not get hung up on gender.

hugs rita

[Lorenqt]

They are also necessary for oral sex as well (and a similar barrier is needed when done on someone with a vagina.) Diseases are also spread via mouth to genital contact. (I mention this because I am shocked by how many people I have met over the years who did not know a condom or barrier is necessary for oral sex and didn't know there was a risk involved with it.)

The risk during oral sex is statistically lower than any other type of sex. If you're talking about a total stranger, I'd definitely say use a rubber.

[Sandy Michaels]

It doesn't matter what type of sex you have. gay, straight, bi, kinky. all sex should be practiced safely. part of that is communicating with your partner. being honest withe each others intent is important.

personally i do prefer being dressed while being with men, and sometimes when i hook up with a woman.

[busker]

I guess intimacy with a stranger can always be a roll of the dice with safety.

I feel I am over safe...a guy basically has to speak Russian and grow feathers to convince me that he's something suitable to consider bringing home.

My standards have never let me down. ;)

I think it's good to stress honesty though...I mean, I think of sex is the name of the game, it should be pretty clear and that some things may be a tad bit different.

Welcome to the forum though! I haven't seen you here before!
Я гаварю по Русскй
I'm working on the feathers. LOL

[busker]

Basically, anal sex can cause tiny tears in the lining of the rectum through which HIV could enter the body.
Well, that and other STDs as well.

I you remember not too long ago, Farah Fawcette died of anal cancer thatis associated with anal sex, so there are other concerns as well.

[TxKimberly]

? . . And, now that I've had mind-melting, earth-shattering, toe clinching ecstasy because of someone I love...

Wow, you are making me so jealous! ;)

As for the concept of the GG's not wanting the competition from us, I want to thank you for the laugh. Let's face it, VERY few of us pose a credible "threat" (should they choose to see it that way). I can think of many reasons that a typical woman may not like the idea of man on man sex, especially for a woman with a cd for an SO, but I doubt very much that not wanting the competition is the reason for a single one.

The last thing I want to comment on is this "prudish" forum. Every where you look on the Internet, you see CD websites where sex is a huge part of conversation. I'm sick of that stuff and obviously so are a LOT of other people, because THIS prudish site is far and away the largest CD site on the web. Don't get me wrong, an occasional post like this, especially when approached in a reasonably intelligent maner as this one was, is cool, but I don't WANT to be a part of a forum that revolves around that crap.

[docrobbysherry]

When I first came out here, I became friends with a pretty "gay" CD. I was very curious how she handled her dates. She said she was very careful and very explicit. They did what she wanted at all times and were ALWAYS told before dates she wasn't going to have sex with them! Of course, maybe she could be a lot pickier than the average CD. She's simply gorgeous! When she rarely posts a pic here, she gets WAY over 1000 hits! But, I think every CD who dates men should follow her lead!


----------------
This is what I question: the single CDers who are content staying at the fantasy stage. This would drive me crazy! lol. What I'm about to say does not apply to TSs but if I were a M2F CDer, I would most definitely experiment to see if my experience as a male-bodied individual with another male-bodied individual would float my boat. I understand the married CDers not wanting to do this, but honestly if they are married they have no business fantasizing about anyone male or female other than their spouse, do they. Much better to work on improving a sex life with the existing spouse. :)
My goodness, Reine! This may be the most naive post I've ever read from u! Basically, we're talking about MEN here! U talk about folks with strong sex drives, unbelievable imaginations, many of whom who live their entire sex lives in a fantasy world!? There r no limits to who and what SOME men will have sex with! And, even LESS limits to their thots! The male friends I grew up with had sex with photos! Hey! I like looking at pretty pictures in Playboy, too. But, having sex with the pics? No way! I'm the EXCEPTION, tho. Sex is ALL about fantasies for men. Without perfect physical manipulation, men, especially older men, use their imaginations to become erect. I'll bet u would VERY surprised to see what some men r thinking as they have sex with their SO of many years! As an older man myself, NOTHING would surprise me!

[LisaMallon]

Ha ha ha docrobbysherry, you are so right about some men.

Some guys will have sex with anything that moves ... and twice with anything that doesn't move.

[Rebecca W.]

Wow, you are making me so jealous! ;)

The last thing I want to comment on is this "prudish" forum. Every where you look on the Internet, you see CD websites where sex is a huge part of conversation. I'm sick of that stuff and obviously so are a LOT of other people, because THIS prudish site is far and away the largest CD site on the web. Don't get me wrong, an occasional post like this, especially when approached in a reasonably intelligent maner as this one was, is cool, but I don't WANT to be a part of a forum that revolves around that crap.

Kimberly,
I agree with you on that comment.

[Helen Grandeis]

Sex is 100% all in our minds. Intimacy that resonates with our own mental needs is effortlessly and profoundly pleasurable!

[AKKaren]

I agree with Kimberly's statement...This forum has so much to offer those that aren't driven by sex all the time!
Wow, you are making me so jealous! ;)

As for the concept of the GG's not wanting the competition from us, I want to thank you for the laugh. Let's face it, VERY few of us pose a credible "threat" (should they choose to see it that way). I can think of many reasons that a typical woman may not like the idea of man on man sex, especially for a woman with a cd for an SO, but I doubt very much that not wanting the competition is the reason for a single one.

The last thing I want to comment on is this "prudish" forum. Every where you look on the Internet, you see CD websites where sex is a huge part of conversation. I'm sick of that stuff and obviously so are a LOT of other people, because THIS prudish site is far and away the largest CD site on the web. Don't get me wrong, an occasional post like this, especially when approached in a reasonably intelligent maner as this one was, is cool, but I don't WANT to be a part of a forum that revolves around that crap.

[Kaz]

Sex... now remind me!.... I seem to have vague memories of encounters with women.... xx :)

[ReineD]

My goodness, Reine! This may be the most naive post I've ever read from u! Basically, we're talking about MEN here! U talk about folks with strong sex drives, unbelievable imaginations, many of whom who live their entire sex lives in a fantasy world!? There r no limits to who and what SOME men will have sex with! And, even LESS limits to their thots! The male friends I grew up with had sex with photos! Hey! I like looking at pretty pictures in Playboy, too. But, having sex with the pics? No way! I'm the EXCEPTION, tho. Sex is ALL about fantasies for men. Without perfect physical manipulation, men, especially older men, use their imaginations to become erect. I'll bet u would VERY surprised to see what some men r thinking as they have sex with their SO of many years! As an older man myself, NOTHING would surprise me!

So you're telling me, all the posts and stories I read here about sex with men are pure, unadulterated fantasy? There's no truth to any of it? :eek:

Well, I'll be. I'm snookered. :D

Seriously Sherry, fantasies posted in a forum are best left to single men. If a husband is in here posting fantasies about having sex with men and his wife finds out about it, he'll end up in divorce court. Best to keep those fantasies to himself, together with all the other fantasies then, just like all the other husbands who fantasize they're with Angelina Jolie (or Brad Pitt) when they're making love with their wives. :p

[Sophia Claire]

Stephenie is right. Most people in my country are quite supportive with gay people, trannies and all the other stuff. But usually when stuff like that is on the news the suspect allways seems to be someone with religious views (Well, I didn't hear it a lot about CDers but it's mostly against homosexual people). So yeah you really have to be carefull with that stuff.

It's a source of deep, deep shame for me as a religious girl to know that such violence is so often associated with religious beliefs. It's so sad that my faith especially has been perverted to justify hatred. It's not what were about and I hope nobody thinks that it is.

[Kate Simmons]

I normally don't post things about my personal life but since Emily asked, well..... Just bear in mind the safety factor is a "given" and anyone who doesn't consider that is not acting responsibly.:)

[Imeni]

I think honestly, as a straight male as far as I've been concerned as I'm open to the idea of being with someone like Miss EmilyWa, who looks like a natural woman despite that might not being the case, I've never been straight out attracted to men. I'm not about to limit the chance to be completely happy because he or she might have a penis, hell, I got one so I mean, come on. It's just a matter of connecting to that said person. Granted, it would be pretty high on my wierd meter to be with a guy. But I like wierd. Makes life more thrilling. D:

But I watched up till the end of the 3rd part and even as just a guy in a dress, I felt like I needed to go and sit down with that kid Noah and tell him that he's a wonderful kid, even if what the rest of the world calls strange, good for him for being who he is. I really hope he doesnt turn into one of those statistics. :(

[Marleena]

I think this thread is fine since it is informative regarding the risks. Lots of warnings here for those that may be interested. It's not my cup of tea but I don't find it offensive at all the way it is being discussed here.

[TeresaL]

Seriously Sherry, fantasies posted in a forum are best left to single men. If a husband is in here posting fantasies about having sex with men and his wife finds out about it, he'll end up in divorce court. Best to keep those fantasies to himself, together with all the other fantasies then, :p

Thank you so much, that's exactly what I wanted to say. :-)

[Shananigans]

But I'm also confused about the condom part if it's two guys

I like that there are threads like this started for this very reason. I don't really care what you do in whatever clothes you want to wear, or with whom. BUT, I really like that the OP brought up personal safety in the forum of honesty and condom usage.

So many people brush this off that "everyone knows," but, then, there are posts like this where someone doesn't know. I don't care who is with who...but, I don't want to see ya at the hospital getting tested for HIV. It just throws my whole day to give that magnitude of bad news.

So, yes, Katiegal. Condom usage is especially needed for sex between two men. STIs/STDs are spread through bodily fluids. It's very important to use a condom with anal sex (be it with a man or a woman) because bodily fluid is exchanged in these areas...it's a big concern for this area, because small tears are not uncommon and they may provide a means to the blood supply. HIV research indicates that receptors for HIV may be in greater numbers in the rectal area...this would mean that anal sex would be extremely risky in the transmission of HIV. Condoms are very effective for preventing the spread of HIV and other STIs, but they are not 100% perfect.

Condoms are absolutely needed for oral sex. Many people mistakenly think that they can perform oral sex to a man, but it is safe as long as he does not ejaculate. This is false. A condom should be worn if there is any contact with your eyes, inside of nose, mouth, vagina, penis, or rectum with another person's genitals. Ejaculation is not necessary because it is likely that there are trace amount of bodily fluids around this area prior to ejaculation. So, condoms are a must. A major concern for condom usage during oral sex is prevention of HIV and herpes. It has been documented numerous times that HIV is also spread through oral sex. If you will be performing oral stimulation to another person's rectal area, you will need a mouth guard.

If you have had unprotected sex, you should get tested. Everyone who is sexually active should be tested yearly. HIV (and, some other STIs) may yield false negatives on detection test until many months after the actual unprotected sexual act. Blood testing with herpes is not as reliable as other detection methods. Herpes, therefore, can remain dormant (or, inactive) in the body until a much later date in time. It's unfortunate, but herpes is best diagnosed when an outbreak is noticed...blood tests yield false positives, and the virus may remain dormant for a long time before actually causing an outbreak.

So, yes, absolutely condoms no matter what. I needed to put this on here for ANYONE just because it's the nurse in me. I love my patients...but, I'd rather them be happy, health, and out of the hospital.

Just echoing the safety issue.


And...

As far as "fantasy" posts... I don't think people are prude here, but I think forums that have a majority of males on it, and make the habit of continuously going into things like that just turn into porn sites/naughty stories sites/booty call sites. There really are PLENTY of those, but very few forums like this. So, I think that the moderators here do a pretty good track of keeping the purpose of the site alive...support. Many of the moderators are GGs...and, I think that, perhaps, it is easy for the masculine sex to just say women are prudish. It's really just that they are seeing past your average 5 inches, and just trying to keep things in line. ;)


As far as GGs just getting pissed because they don't want competition...seriously? Omg...I really want more gay men in the world! Do you understand how many parties have been ruined for me and my friends because guys just can't leave it alone? I'm too busy doing my own thing to worry about what everyone else is doing...the more guys occupied with you, the fewer times I have to say, "No...not interested...thank you, but still no...I'm a huge lesbian...seriously...I was traumatized by testicles as a child...I don't know it was PE class and I blocked it out of my mind..." It's a year before I can go back to dancing with my friends, or I'm exhausted by the time I catch up with the actual hot/interesting men and women.

[MsJanessa]

It's not being judgmental, max. It's being realistic. Fantasies are nice and all, but they don't do anyone any good if they lead some poor soul who doesn't live in Thailand into dangerous situations.

You should read the news, and also have a look at the video I posted. This is Part 1. There are also Parts 2 to 6 on youtube. It's a video about non-binary gender (it's very good) and at the end of the video they also discuss recent studies that confirm that homophobic men (who are most apt to engage in violence against gays or trans), are most attracted to them. In other words, these men repress their own feelings of being gay by engaging in hatred against gays and transwomen.

Sure there are predators out there who want to hurt CDs or GGs--that doesn't mean we shouldn't date or have intimate relationships--it means we should be carefull

[Princess Chantal]

Reading some of the fantasies that many on here have about being treated sexually like a woman while with a guy, makes me shake my head at times. The reasons why it makes me shake my head are as follows:
1) men that seek cd and tg people usually tend to have some interest with the "extra" and would tend to handle it during the passion
2) cds and pre-op tg just don't have the female sexual organs to be treated like a woman while in sexual play. I know when I'm with a woman, anal penetration is not usually on my agenda.

So when a cd friend tells me their fantasy I usually let them know that in reality they are not being treated as a woman but as a gay bottom. They should be comfortable with male on male contact before preceeding on with their curiousity.

As for safety on top of the usage of condoms for both participants, I'd suggest having a dental dam on hand as well for some safe oral activity.

[ReineD]

Sure there are predators out there who want to hurt CDs or GGs--that doesn't mean we shouldn't date or have intimate relationships--it means we should be carefull

Who said that you shouldn't date and have sex with men?

If you're in a venue (OK, I'll say it ... a tranny club) where there are men looking for Tgirls you'll be fine. The dangers lie in straight clubs. You just don't know what the guy who thinks you're sexy will do once he finds out you're not a GG, if he's homophobic. There's no way to control someone else's reaction ahead of time. So how can you "be careful" in a situation like that?

In the video link that I posted, Gwen Araujo was at a party. She was killed when some of the guys found out she was TS.



So when a cd friend tells me their fantasy I usually let them know that in reality they are not being treated as a woman but as a gay bottom. They should be comfortable with male on male contact before preceeding on with their curiousity.

I agree.

[Mistybtm]

I got this question, from a few of my Cd girls friend, wondering about my sex life ? Do i have sex with men in Crossdress or when i dressup as Emily, Answer is YES !
and i have some tip for any girls who might want to try any sexual actions with guy!
1. Honesty : You must be honest to the person you going to have sex with that you are Crossdress, many guys have an fantasy of a girl with a dick.
2.Looking for someone who have an Open mind about SEX>
3. Make sure ( MUST ) that your makeup done right, Your wig are tight and not going to fallout during the sexual activity : )
4. Shave all of your Facial hair and body hair.
5 Use Condom ( MUST )
* If guys wanted to have sex with you doesn't mean he love you or he might but the most important is you and him enjoy the moment....

EmilyWa

very good advise, I do all the things on your list all ready except the body hair hard to get the back hairs when you live alone. every thing else yes.

[Princess Chantal]

In the video link that I posted, Gwen Araujo was at a party. She was killed when some of the guys found out she was TS.

Actually in October of 2010, there was assumed an instance here in Winnipeg that a guy committed an arson to a bath house due to being "fooled" by a transgendered person. The end result there was 2 casualities in the fire, one being a drag queen friend. I haven't heard if the dq friend was the one that had interacted with the arsonist prior to the fire.
But looking at Remembering our dead list (http://www.rememberingourdead.org/about/core.html) and reading the articles associated with the deaths, you would notice quite a common theme with what happened to Gwen

[ReineD]

Thanks for posting this, Chantal.

I'd like to add that Max was perhaps under the impression earlier that I was advocating against CDers dating men. This is not true, I think it's wonderful when male-attracted CDers find men they can be with. But the stark reality at least in this part of the world is unfortunately, homophobia is alive and well. I'm not saying that every man is homophobic, but I think it's important for people to develop a very strong sense of the general attitudes in their own milieus and not get lost in a sense of false security. It's a tricky balance.

When this thread started it raised a red flag for me because it was posted by someone who lives in a part of the world that accepts transwomen more easily than they are accepted in the Western world. And Emily's OP came off as if the only requirement for safety is to tell a straight guy that you're trans, and as long as you do this then you can go ahead and have a good time. While this may be true in Thailand, it's not the case here. A beautiful TS could be sitting at a bar 20 feet away from a guy that she hasn't even spoken to, and if he has been eying her all night then finds out she's TS things can get out of hand.

[Princess Chantal]

A beautiful TS could be sitting at a bar 20 feet away from a guy that she hasn't even spoken to, and if he has been eying her all night then finds out she's TS things can get out of hand.

So true, Several years ago, while I (not crossdressed) and a few friends were out enjoying the night at one of Winnipeg's popular Exchange District night clubs there was some chatter floating around the club about beating up a "*******". Apparently the transperson had attracted some interest from several guys. After dancing with one of the guys the truth of her birth gender was exposed and didn't take long for the transphobic juices to gush out.
Thank gawd the staff of the club got a whiff of the chatter and took the appropriate actions. At the end of the night, a couple bouncers accompanied the tsperson and her gg friends to make sure they were safe while they waited for the taxi.

[Presh GG]

As Reine so well pointed out, we have a few very beautiful TS women here on the forum who were almost killed just for being.. period.

One was just getting her mail.

Yes, things are differant here . Error on the better side of caution.

Good night,
Presh

[Sandy Michaels]

there area dangers everywhere. people slip in the shower everyday. walk outside and get hit by a bus. random things always happen. yes there will be targeted events, but that applies to everyone. that's not going to stop me from dressing or enjoying the company of men or women. you just have to be smart about it. don't let fear ruin your experiences. go out have fun, and i can't stress the importance of practicing safe sex.

[Sophia Claire]

Sure there are predators out there who want to hurt CDs or GGs--that doesn't mean we shouldn't date or have intimate relationships--it means we should be carefull

We are living a deceptively dangerous lifestyle. I recommend everyone take a good self-defense class. They're fun, and they just might save your life!

Krav Maga is a very good one for self-defense. It's the same thing that Israeli soldiers use for self defense when they're walking through Palestinian neighborhoods of their cities. Apparently, they get jumped frequently in the poorer neighborhoods. Without getting into the politics of it, they're isolated in an incredibly hostile environment and frequently have to brawl their way out. Actually, come to think of it, things can very quickly become THAT intense for us as well...

If you can find it, there's a martial art called Bujinkan Ryu Budo Taijutsu. This is the stuff! It combines the surviving schools of Ninjutsu into one very diverse art whose main philosophy is less about winning the fight as it is escaping with your life. VERY difficult to find a school, though.

Filipino Martial Arts is a lot of fun and will teach you a lot about the mechanics of a fight as well as how to use basically any little bit of scrap that's lying around as a weapon, but it's mostly a "shed blood first, ask questions later" art, so defending yourself with FMA can get really ugly, legally speaking. Keep in mind that legally you're only allowed to use JUST ENOUGH force to maintain positive control of a situation. But then, given the staggering history of extreme violence against CD/TG/TS folks, perhaps you can justify going straight for the sayoc dagger (it's a foot long double edged nasty looking thing) approach.

Seriously, ladies. It's worth considering.

Hugs,
Sophie

[Desiree2bababe]

I wouldn't blame any guy for wanting you, you are gorgeous!!

[ReineD]

there area dangers everywhere. people slip in the shower everyday. walk outside and get hit by a bus. random things always happen. yes there will be targeted events, but that applies to everyone. that's not going to stop me from dressing or enjoying the company of men or women. you just have to be smart about it. don't let fear ruin your experiences. go out have fun, and i can't stress the importance of practicing safe sex.

This brings to mind another point. I don't know if you or others have watched the video about gender earlier in the thread (the full series is here: http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?175742), but I'm guessing that men who are prone to homophobia might be particularly nasty towards transwomen who are genuinely sexy by both TS and GG standards, in other words if these homophobes truly have no clue ahead of time that the woman he is attracted to is trans. There's a big difference between looking like this:

http://krodack.files.wordpress.com/2011/09/thailadyboys1.jpg
(This pic was taken from this article: https://pittqueertheoryf11.wordpress.com/2011/09/29/racing-sex-and-sexing-race/)

... and looking like the majority of CDers who post pics in the Gallery here. Although many of our members are beautiful, they are not in the same league as the transwomen in the picture above (they're not on hormones, they haven't had FFS, they may be much older). I shouldn't think they'd incite the same type of violence and hostility, since in real life, people can tell they are not genetic women when they look closely or interact with them, and therefore they won't "fool" a homophobe in the same way. There's a subtle difference here but it may be an important one.

It's complicated though, and I've no doubt there is still strong hostility among some homophobes just based on a general hatred of transfolks, even if they are not attracted to her because they know ahead of time she is not a GG. Some of the pics of the transwomen who were murdered in post #78 show transwomen past a certain age who as previously mentioned, were attractive but without being in the same league as a Thailand showgirl.

[Lorenqt]

Sure there are predators out there who want to hurt CDs or GGs--that doesn't mean we shouldn't date or have intimate relationships--it means we should be carefull

I've been both physically and sexually assaulted, so I know all about predators. I try not to let it get to me, but honestly, it can be hard. Some times when I'm talking with a guy for the first time, in the back of my mind is "Is he going to hurt me too?"

Life goes on. I have to go on - otherwise they win. Just be careful, stay aware of your surroundings, and listen to yourself (if your mind is telling you "Danget, get out!" there might be a good reason).

[busker]

I've been both physically and sexually assaulted, so I know all about predators. I try not to let it get to me, but honestly, it can be hard. Some times when I'm talking with a guy for the first time, in the back of my mind is "Is he going to hurt me too?"

Life goes on. I have to go on - otherwise they win. Just be careful, stay aware of your surroundings, and listen to yourself (if your mind is telling you "Danget, get out!" there might be a good reason).

There 's a really good way to start the evening! that makes a person relaxed and ready to enjoy dinner, etc. if that is all I could anticipate in my life, I would be making dates with right hand. sometimes the danger signal might come too late and there is no time to get out. It is not a life that I would want. I would definitely be re-examining my life. sorry if this sounds like a criticism--it isn't , just a comment on a way of life that I personally wouldn't endure ( though you are obviously free to do as you wish, it is your life) , cding and/or sex be damned.

[busker]

This brings to mind another point. I don't know if you or others have watched the video about gender earlier in the thread (the full series is here: http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?175742), but I'm guessing that men who are prone to homophobia might be particularly nasty towards transwomen who are genuinely sexy by both TS and GG standards, in other words if these homophobes truly have no clue ahead of time that the woman he is attracted to is trans. There's a big difference between looking like this:

http://krodack.files.wordpress.com/2011/09/thailadyboys1.jpg
(This pic was taken from this article: https://pittqueertheoryf11.wordpress.com/2011/09/29/racing-sex-and-sexing-race/)

... and looking like the majority of CDers who post pics in the Gallery here. Although many of our members are beautiful, they are not in the same league as the transwomen in the picture above (they're not on hormones, they haven't had FFS, they may be much older). I shouldn't think they'd incite the same type of violence and hostility, since in real life, people can tell they are not genetic women when they look closely or interact with them, and therefore they won't "fool" a homophobe in the same way. There's a subtle difference here but it may be an important one.

It's complicated though, and I've no doubt there is still strong hostility among some homophobes just based on a general hatred of transfolks, even if they are not attracted to her because they know ahead of time she is not a GG. Some of the pics of the transwomen who were murdered in post #78 show transwomen past a certain age who as previously mentioned, were attractive but without being in the same league as a Thailand showgirl.

That is for certain ( and should perhaps be a warning about threads dealing with "passing"), but it isn't clear whether these are pre- or post-op TS and whether the intention here is homosexual encounters or not, or are these LBs looking for partners and long term relationships, gay or straight. The article you mentioned sounds generally like academic hooey though it does confirm what I have read on a Thai website that LBs are only partly accepted and that MONEY is the object in many transactions.
" Plessy v. Ferguson. The Plessy case was central to the identification and separation of bodies as being either “black” or “white.” One could stretch this I guess from the doctrine of separate but equal, to be something about gay/black/white/straight , but that would be twisting this all out of common sense, like saying the statue of Liberty has something to do with immigration.

[Sam-antha]

From the mix of replies I am beginning to wonder what the original query was about... certainly it was not about healthy safe sex. Although it would seem that not a few members could use advice in this area..... eg that the use of toothpicks does open minor blood wounds in ones mouth and that a condom is hardly a protection then....but that info is obtainable elsewhere surely...not here.
The forum query was specific to CD members wishes and actions dressed/out.
For myself I am almost past any multi-faceted active sex by now and with years of experience behind me, one way or another, I would say that if you have a boat, go rock it, knowing the risks. If you donot yet have a boat, go and find one, it might just turn out to be fun.
Remember too that sex is for fun.
~Samm

[victoriamwilliams1]

I did not watch the videos yet however I will chime in:

I am married to a wonderful woman and I often have said "he is married" but "she is not" She is referring to my girl side! Now to be 100% transparent I will say that yes I have been attracted as a woman and only as a woman to a few guys and I have thought about them! I have even been kissed by a guy and at the time I did not like it and at times I have thought about him but not in a sexual way.

Now personally because I am married I do not cross that line nor do I want to cross that line. I have been asked out by guys which I have not taken the offers because they are in other states and I understand that if I open the door to a relationship with a guy it can create some problems that I do not want to think about. I will say that many girl do dress to have relationships with men because they want the full experience of being a woman, which is fine for them and they take risk that should not be taken. I for one over the last few years been asked out and proposed to and I thought I was a hot mess and at times I still think I am! However like I have said in the past I have met only one guy and I have only fell for one guy and he left that job! I am glad he did cause in girl mode I wanted in a bad way!! In guy mode I could care less!

However if your a full time woman and your into guys just be safe and be honest with them!!