hourglass figures ain't what they are cracked up to be

[Babeba]

I know that a lot of the cross dressers and TG and TS folk on here seem to idolize feminine curves, and what feminine curve is more admired than an hourglass? I have to tell you ladies (as I assume the gents are less interested in this sort of body shape talk) that there are problems with EVERY shape.

For example, I was at the mall trying on clothes for the first time in months. I pulled on this top which had a wide waist band of cotton lace, a princess neckline and a pretty floaty hem... Designed, I thought, to emphasize the waistline. Once I got it on, I realized that it completely missed my natural waist by several inches, squeezed under my arms and between that and the floatyness in the lower portion of the shirt I looked either four months pregnant or kind of like a stuffed sausage. Eep! It is actually pretty hard for me to find shirts that fit my waist and then get big enough for my hips, or are big enough for my hips but don't have enough material at the waist for a second person. Add in the fact I am less happy about my upper arms than I would like, and it is difficult to find clothes sometimes.

There are other items I have a hard time wearing: dropped waist shirts and dresses, hipster belts, high necks, those cute shirts with the cravat -y collars you can loosely tie, skirts that hit my knees, wide straps on halter tops or tank tops... There is a long list. On the other hand, someone with more of a triangle shape looks super cute in a lot of those!

I like my figure a lot, despite having issues with what I can wear and feel the most confident in. It took figuring out what worked with my body rather than fighting it, but I truly think anyone can find a good fit on their clothes.

How about you? Is there a style you have found works for you? One you would like to wear but can't pull off? Have you figured out how to best love your body?

[Joan_CD]

I find A line skirts work for me. When wearing jeans I always found them to be a little baggy at the hip, but I switched to a juniors size and find they fit much better. Love my body? Not yet!

[Stephenie S]

Style? I think every has to find their own style. Me? I pretty much dress out of the LL Bean catalog. A relaxed, outdoorsy, casual. At work I dress standard business casual. Finding your style is part of growing up. But I see no reason why you can't change your style if you so desire and as your circumstances change. When I was younger I was all over the hippie look, with beads and long skirts and shawls and headbands. But now a days I want to present a more dignified and professional look. Finding your style is important, though, I think. Otherwise you seem disorganized and slightly immature.

Stephie

[2B Natasha]

I find that tops are to short for me in the average store. I do find some that work well but I have to just be comfortable with a minimum overlap on the hems. The other style that I would LOVE to wear and I can't get it to look right are wrap dresses. Because of the length of my torso and wear my breasts need to sit to look natural the wrap part always wraps right over the breast or I have to go under, which of course looks just stupid. But I sure wish I cold find one that would work right. I love the look.

[Babeba]

Stephenie,

Some of the members on here post that they feel like they are going through their teenage girl phases, so 'growing up' could be part of the story here.

I really posted my own clothing dilemmas because I see so many CDers resorting to combinations of forms, Veronica's and corsets to get an hourglass shape, when by fitting your clothes to you rather than you to your clothes... It feels nice.

[Lynn Marie]

Personally I hate corsets and pads. I attempt to get an appropriate figure with tight waisted skirts and maybe a waist cinching belt. Most women have the same problems that we do in trying to look good so I'm in good company.

[Karen_Ski]

How absolutely correct you are Lynn Marie. If one takes the time to study the female form you will see hat most women over 40 suffer from a large midsection and try to create a figure the same as we do! Why in heaven's sake do you think their is so much shapewear in the stores today? I was in Kohl's the other day and Ithink the shapewear selection almost rivals the bra selection. Dress for the figure you have girls and leave the tight corsets in the closet!

[Stephenie S]

I can remember experimenting when I was young (the 1950s), but I think most of my clothing was dictated by my mother. At that time "style" was everything, but it was my mother's style. I don't think I had much choice in the matter at all. I just accepted it as gospel. But that was the time of white gloves and shirtwaist dresses from Villager.

I went off to college (I graduated from high school in 1961) and found a whole new world. My mother had lobbied hard against the college I chose because they allowed girls to wear jeans to class. I went anyway. That was the beginning of my hippie years. It was freedom at last for me. I haven't worn a girdle or stockings since and I never want to again. Shapewear? Not very many women wear that stuff now a days. Oh, we have our Spanx, and I do own a waist nipper, but I can't remember when I had it on last. Do I want to go back? No thank you. I want comfort. Yes, I want style, and of course I want to look good, but those days of rigid control garments are gone forever and I'm glad.

There are plenty of ways to dress well without padding and constricting undergarments. It may take some time to develop your own style, but it's essential, I think, and well worth the effort.

Stephie

[Kathi Lake]

Babea, I hear you!

Due to my shape, dresses are usually not my friend. Like you, the waist usually hits me right below the bust. So, it's usually two-piece dressing for me. As for skirts, they all hit me above the knee - whether they're designed that way or not.

Over time, I have found some styles that work for me, and some that I surely wish they did, but don't. My arms, for instance. Since my body fat percentage is so low, you can see every vein, every muscle. I usually have to wear a shrug, which not only hides my arms, but makes my waist look smaller. Also, the 'long over lean' look with leggings and a tunic looks good on me, I've found.

Kathi

[Eryn]

I don't have a corset or hip pads at the present, and my wife has said that she doesn't think they will do me any good. I have noticed that most women of my height tend to have an "athletic" build so I lean that way.

Having a "stick" figure does have its advantages. A lot of those fashions that GGs lament "only look good on the mannequins" fit me very well. I can wear long dresses and skirts well and even pull off a skimpy cocktail dress at the right occasion.

[busker]

I know what you mean since all MY sand has shifted to the lower half! If the women have trouble wearing the clothes that were designed for THEM, what chance have we got that they will fit? If I wear hip huggers they are size 10, if I wear pants to fit my waist they are size 12 and a skirt requires size 14. I haven't even begun to think about STYLE!

[docrobbysherry]

Stephenie,

Some of the members on here post that they feel like they are going through their teenage girl phases, so 'growing up' could be part of the story here.

I really posted my own clothing dilemmas because I see so many CDers resorting to combinations of forms, Veronica's and corsets to get an hourglass shape, when by fitting your clothes to you rather than you to your clothes... It feels nice.
I ENJOY shaping my figure to fit an outfit I think I will like! Sometimes, like u, Babeba, I'm NOT happy with the result!

I resemble your "teenage girl" remark! As I've been dressing for about 15 years! And, I've noticed changes in how I prfer to dress recently. Do u think I'll grow out of WHATEVER stage I'm in now?

[Persephone]

http://i3.photobucket.com/albums/y53/sandylewiscares/MarilynCurves.jpg

Hugs,
Persephone

[noeleena]

Hi,

Spos i can say im a little different then,

bust is 41 in's. bra size 16 d, waist is 34 to 35 in's ,skirt size 16. hips are, 39 in's. shoes 11 womens or for the men size 8, height 5, 9 , weight 11 stone = 154 lb, shoulders 18 ins, across, . size 18 to 20 depending on make,

& im quite happy with my body shape & if i buy any clothes that i like & its not quite right then ill strip it down & redo it or add where its needed plus i design make & sew many of the clothes i have. skirts are more me .

& theres a few women in our groups who are shaped similer to myself,

I have found many womens clothes do fit me very nicely so my body shape must be in keeping with quite a few women.

Now style oh yes i like very much Renaissance 1400 to 1700 & im quite happy getting around in mine flying in Austraila in my wench outfit a red skirt over laid on my white / cream linnen under skirt, with black lace around the botton with my short sleved blouse, with a sleveless over tunic in autum leaf colours & white / cream head scave.with head band ,same colour

so was i looked at ....oh yes, & even had a woman take my pic, i know those who saw me enjoyed my outfit some thing compleatly different & my earings & neckless a bold shape about 2 in's round in a lovely orange red colour .to match my colours,

...noeleena...

[Cheryl T]

My biggest problem is a long torso and finding tall dresses to fit. All the Misses sizes place the waist at the wrong height and as you said, make me look pregnant.
Other than that I just wish I had something to show so that I could wear a low cut top or dress and enjoy it.

[Karren H]

I love my corsets and will never give them up!! The nice thing about wearing a corset and having shape enhancing products is that you can make adjustments to them to make the clothes fit better vs having to try to make the clothes fit your body! Lol.

[Ms Mira]

I think every single (genetic) female I have ever known complains about being unable to find clothes that really fit their shape while shopping. Meanwhile, society idolizes and tries to squeeze all of them into an hourglass. *

[Confetti]

Since most clothes in us are made in china the sizes are way off unless you try everything on. The women who I know complain are more of a tomato shape or bed pillow. When I wore a 0 could not find size it was always sold out never a sale. Ebay is better but still a crappy crap shoot.Sewing helps make it work.

[Stephenie S]

I think every single (genetic) female I have ever known complains about being unable to find clothes that really fit their shape while shopping. Meanwhile, society idolizes and tries to squeeze all of them into an hourglass. *

Dear Mira,

I really do think you exaggerate. "Society" doesn't try to squeeze all women into an hourglass shape. True, that was once the norm in advertizing, but even then (the 1950s that I mentioned earlier), the reality was that few could actually attain that shape. Look critically around you. Real women just don't look like that. Yes, most of us do have large hips (and thighs) and smaller shoulders and chest than most men, but "hour-glasss"? I don't think so. I am a woman. I live with three other women and work in a female dominated profession. I am around other women all the time. That we are all forced into an hour-glass shape is just not true. Actally most of the women I know, including myself, are overweight and would love to lose those extra pounds that accumulate around the middle of REAL people. If your only examples of what women look like come from advertising, you may find it easy to develop an unrealistic view of the female body. But remember, almost ALL advertising is airbrushed right out of reality in the attempt to get us to spend more money chasing a fantasy.

Don't fall victim to that fantasy.

Stephie

[Stephenie S]

Since most clothes in us are made in china the sizes are way off unless you try everything on. The women who I know complain are more of a tomato shape or bed pillow. When I wore a 0 could not find size it was always sold out never a sale. Ebay is better but still a crappy crap shoot.Sewing helps make it work.

Yes, I agree. Trying on clothes is almost a necessity. But it can be fun. I love to shop!

S

But dear, a size 0??? I hate you already, LOL.

[Kate Simmons]

Well we do have a distinct advantage over GG's in some respects Hon. We can mix, match, switch, add, detract, or just forget all together some enhancements to make a particular article of clothing work for us. You gals don't have that option as your parts are pretty much "fixed". Why WE complain so much about a look boggles me sometimes.:heehee::)

[Kathi Lake]

When I wore a 0 could not find size it was always sold out never a sale.Can't find the smaller sizes? Do what I did - move to a state with larger women.

(starts ducking)

:)

Kathi

[kimdl93]

I'm still figuring it out. I am self conscious about my shoulders (even more so than my height). I tend to favor tops that have raglan or dohlman sleeves because in my minds eye at least, they round out and understate the shoulders a bit. My favorites are either wrap or faux wrap - which accentuate my waist and bustline - again distracting from my shoulders a bit. I also tend towards tunic tops, because of the length of my torso. I'll often wear a belt or chain just at or above my waistline to give my body a little more feminine dimensions.

I'm actually fairly large around the hips, and with my shaper/corset nipping in my waist a bit, think that part at least begins to approximate female proportions. So if I wear a skirt, its usually an A line. In dresses, I very strongly prefer wrap or faux wrap styles with 3/4 sleeves...for the same reasons as mentioned with tops.

As for dresses, I tend toward

[suchacutie]

Clothes? Style? OMG, it can be an incredible challenge, even with my wife helping all the time!

Ok, I'm an inverted triangle with muscular arms. I tried a boat-neck top and my wife just started giggling! It made me look a mile wide! Now, in male mode she loves that, but on Tina it looks like I'm a retired linebacker for a pro football team! So, I have to favor V-neck tops and/or some sort of jewelry to accent the vertical.

So I buy a dress that fits my top, but then it better have a way to draw in the waist or I definitely look pregnant! And why does no one mention that a waist cincher is great, but only after you lose a bunch of weight! Otherwise the body tends to roll out of the top of the cincher generating a terrible bulge (notice that Tina often gives reason for my wife to giggle!).

The there are pants issues! A scan of the size charts shows that the expected waist is 10 inches smaller than the expected hips. HA! I'm 20 pounds away from coming close enough to that so that my waist cincher can finish the job! So, all my pants/jeans have to be low rise so that I can use the hip measurment.

All this means a size 18-20 top and a size 8 bottom. Just a bit of a challenge! But, if I don't do anything about it, my torso just screams "MALE". The back is just not curved enough and the butt is not big enough to even imply a female figure without really working at it.

Having said that, losing some weight, adding the waist cincher, keeping my arms covered and accenting the verticalness of everything, it actually works! Now if I can only find bangles big enough to fit over my hands!

No one said this would be easy!

[Babeba]

I think every single (genetic) female I have ever known complains about being unable to find clothes that really fit their shape while shopping. Meanwhile, society idolizes and tries to squeeze all of them into an hourglass. *

This is just it - they DON'T. I HAVE that hourglass (0.6-0.7 waist to hip ratio, and evened out on top) and it is just as impossible for me to find clothes as anyone else - if not more so. I am at the point where I am considering just getting my pants custom made because they just don't make them so they fit. There is NO magical shape that makes clothes fit a certain way.

There ARE styles which are flattering on EVERY body type, you just have to learn them for your type, and love and accept who you as a person are.

[kimdl93]

Can't find the smaller sizes? Do what I did - move to a state with larger women.

(starts ducking)

:)


Kathi

Gutsy comment, from a skinny little thing.

For the record I am looking forward to a tip back to my ancestral home of Norway, where it's not at all uncommon for women to be over 6 feet tall..and gorgeous :)

[daviolin]

Hey were crossdressers. We can't expect the feminime stuff to fit just right. 90% of us will always look like I guy in a dress anyway. Including me. But what the heck. If it feels good wear it. A very close GG friend of mine said to me, while I was wearing a very unapropreate outfit for my age. " Hey, your a crossdresser, you can wear anything you like." I liked that. And I do wear anything I like. Daviolin

[Confetti]

I am more like a 4/6 now and it takes 3 hours a day working out to stay a 0. And I love the dolls remark about cross dressing I just wish everyone enjoyed dressing - totally loving make up and disguises I am the perfect girl friend for a cd or tv.

[Danni Bear]

size 0 ???

try size 0 in a petite

(Ducking already) i have to do most of my shopping in JRS and MISSES to keep them from being just too large and falling off

Danni

[Marleena]

size 0 ???

try size 0 in a petite

(Ducking already) i have to do most of my shopping in JRS and MISSES to keep them from being just too large and falling off

Danni

*sigh*

Anyways Babeba, I don't have any hips so that's where I need the most help. I've had bicep issues with a couple tops too, so women really have arms that skinny?

[Marie-Elise]

Because I have a (ahem) tolerably prominent belly, I find that only dresses with an empire waist look good on me. If I am wearing a skirt, I stick to tops that look like they accentuate the hips since I don't really have any. Don't know anything about jeans or slacks or capris. I only wear skirts and dresses.

[Babeba]

*sigh*

Anyways Babeba, I don't have any hips so that's where I need the most help. I've had bicep issues with a couple tops too, so women really have arms that skinny?

I don't have arms that skinny (mine are pretty meaty), but some (many) women do. I console myself with the thought that as I put far on my limbs more than my waist my chances of diabetes or heart disease are way lower than most people, statistically speaking! :) on the other hand, in cheap shops I find shirts that are ridiculously too small in the forearms and tent like in the body.

Have you thought about the high waisted, pleated trousers that seem kind if popular these days? Or is slightly androgynous too male? Tulip waisted tops are also your friend. I don't think you need to go to extreme, padded lengths though! You're pretty!

Danni, I think the sizes in the States work a little different than in Canada, my mom goes shopping in the dates a couple times a year and says it is hard to find things outside the miss section.

[Jacqueline Winona]

Another fantasy shattered! :) Seriously, I can understand, genetic men's suits don't always fit the way they are supposed to either for those of us who are shorter than average, and women's clothes aren't easy to figure out for those with shorter legs but relatively broad shoulders.

[Maddie22]

This is just it - they DON'T. I HAVE that hourglass (0.6-0.7 waist to hip ratio, and evened out on top) and it is just as impossible for me to find clothes as anyone else - if not more so. I am at the point where I am considering just getting my pants custom made because they just don't make them so they fit. There is NO magical shape that makes clothes fit a certain way.

There ARE styles which are flattering on EVERY body type, you just have to learn them for your type, and love and accept who you as a person are.

I went into a very nice re-sell boutique a few weeks ago. I was talking to the SA on how I thought that the average size these days was between a 12 & 16. She said I was correct (or at least we were pretty sure), and then I asked her why I had so much trouble finding those sizes. Her reply was that because everyone is buying them. It's much tougher to keep those sizes in stock.

It makes sense. At the same time though it seems as though the fashionable stores cater to the more fit/smaller sized woman (places like Express, The Limited, BR etc...). Babeba, your appearance in your avatar makes you look like you could be shopping at one of these type of stores. Maybe you fall into the average size of these stores, and therefor are unable to find clothes. Just a thought.

For me, I have a very long frame, with everything being mostly narrow. Until you get to my shoulders, which are wide. For me, I look for outfits or dresses that will flare out my hops to give me more of a balance. A line skirts and dresses work well. I can even pull of the strapless ok as well. I don't look good in halter tops though, it accents my shoulders too much. I also have a different fit in pants than tops.

Mostly, I find that dresses work the best for me, which I find to be the most comfortable anyways. There are so many casual sun dresses and winter dresses too, that I'm surprised more women do not wear them more often. It's so simple to wear too, only one piece to worry about!

[Marleena]

Have you thought about the high waisted, pleated trousers that seem kind if popular these days? Or is slightly androgynous too male? Tulip waisted tops are also your friend. I don't think you need to go to extreme, padded lengths though!

Thanks so much! Nope, not into the androgynous look.:) The padded hips routine gets me the desired results for jeans and skirts, I guess I can put up with it. I prefer 3/4 sleeve to hide the biceps but Sofia Vergara brand is the worst. I'm not working anymore so hopefully the biceps will reduce in size.

[Stephanie47]

At six foot even I have found it difficult to find any dress with a waist line at MY natural waist. So, it's empire waist dresses, wraps and sheaths for me. My natural figure is 42-38-40, so I guess I really do not look really out of shape. I'm sure I could reduce my waist to a 34 with a corset. Maybe a 36 if I just work at it some more.

As far as many women and cross dressers go, just read all the articles concerning obesity, diabetes, poor diet, etc. It seems the race is really on to kill ourselves. I would not want an emaciated look either. Twiggy is not anyone's idea of beauty, so I hope! I think a pot belly guy looks worse than a woman with a weight problem just by virtue of how excess weight is carried.

The school free lunch program was instituted after WW2 because of the high rejection rates of draftees and enlistees due to poor diet during the depression. Now the rejection rate of potential enlistees is due to too many fat asses.

Maybe it's my quest to look my best in a dress that keeps my physique in check.

[luscious]

if you wear a corset for a year,your body will conform to it.
waist training in a year.

many "show girls" get four ribs removed and waist train.
I know this from being around pageants like miss gay America,miss continental and other tg/ts pageants.

http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?176265-solve-thiscorset-showing-issue-with-me