Post Office, problem

[JoanAz]

I normally wear Short Shorts / Speedo type around the house with a LONG T-Shirt over them that comes down well below the bottom of the Sorts.
I have met the Postal mail deliverer (Female) several time to pick up a package at the front door.
For the last 10 days I have been getting Mail Notice "sorry we missed you"
then I have to drive down to the Post Office to pick up the package.
On day 8 I asked the driver about missing the delivery. She said postmaster says not to deliver to my Front Door.
On day 10 I knew a package was arriving (tracking #) and waited for the delivery. She came to the mail box, dropped mail and left, there was a Sorry we Missed you notice.
I jumped in my car and caught up to her and asked for the Package.
I was infromed it is in the Post Office.
To cut post short, speaking to Postmaster she complainde about how i was "Dressed" when she met me at the Door...

Does this contritute Sexual harasment?
Coments welcome.
Nothing was indecent or showing in all the meetings>
((HUGGS)))

[Renee W]

As long as you were answering the door properly dressed, whether it be in male clothes or female clothes, don't see any grounds for them to refuse delivery when door service is required.

I would speak to the postmaster again and ask if they would go on record as to the reason and then start working your way up hill. Everyone has a boss to report to and all you have to do is find the right one and watch it flow downhill from there.

[Shelly Preston]

I dont know about sexual harrassment but it does seem excessive.

You have not even been given the chance to explain you were not dressed in an indecent manner. I assume the postwoman thought you were not wearing shorts.

I think you deserve a full explanation.

[BRANDYJ]

I don't think you have a case for sexual harassment. It appears that the female postal worker for whatever reason was uncomfortable with your manor of dress at the door. She might have felt the way you were dressed was a sexual come on to her and advised the Post Master that she felt sexually harassed by your lack of cover answering the door. There might have been an exchange of words that made her feel concerned. From your description of how you were dressed and the fact that you had met this same female postal worker at the door in the past why now is she uncomfortable making a delivery unless there were some words exchanged, or in the past you were covered better then the way you describe. But sexual harassment? Not a chance.

[Annie D]

The first thing that came to my mind was because your shirt is so much longer than the type of shorts you were wearing, she thought that you were not wearing anything under the shirt and would "flash" her. To tell you the truth, if my wife or my daughter was your mail carrier, I would advise them to avoid going to your door as well. I don't know what the law is about if someone is inside their house/apartment and flashes someone else standing at the doorway or doorstep because it could be a "my word against yours" situation but why take the chance. It doesn't sound like harrassment but it could be considered "sexually deviant" on your part. Not that you ever intended it to be anything except being comfortable in your own home but it sounds to me that you have "mis-stepped" in the way you were dressed and now have to live with it.

[Melissa Rose]

It is not sexual harassment based on standard definitions. It could be twisted into a form of discrimination depending on how she articulated her complaint, but she would have to be totally ignorant of common policies or foolish to have justified her reasons in that way. If the postal carrier for some reasons feels unsafe, mail delivery to a house can be denied; however, uncomfortable and unsafe are not the same thing. If it is a case of only being uncomfortable then door delivery should resume. If the postal carrier can make a good case of it being about safety or feeling threatened by your behavior then you may have to pick up packages at the post office in the future. As others have said, she may have thought you had nothing on under the shirt and/or something about your demeanor set off warning bells in her head.

[kimdl93]

Evidently the way you met her at the door was a problem for her. I don't know believe it was harrassment - if you were covered up as you described. Still, if I were you I wouldn't make it a habit of meeting the postal carrier at the door dressed in such a manner. If it happened once, its just a happenstance. If it happens repeatedly, I guess she might consider something more than chance.

[Marleena]

Not sexual harassment, but possibly discrimination. It is not against the law to be dressed as you please as long as you are not considered indecent or exposed. No laws are on the books about being dressed in woman's clothes. You letter carrier is being ridiculous as far as I'm concerned.

[Flent]

The first thing that came to my mind was because your shirt is so much longer than the type of shorts you were wearing, she thought that you were not wearing anything under the shirt and would "flash" her. To tell you the truth, if my wife or my daughter was your mail carrier, I would advise them to avoid going to your door as well. I don't know what the law is about if someone is inside their house/apartment and flashes someone else standing at the doorway or doorstep because it could be a "my word against yours" situation but why take the chance. It doesn't sound like harrassment but it could be considered "sexually deviant" on your part. Not that you ever intended it to be anything except being comfortable in your own home but it sounds to me that you have "mis-stepped" in the way you were dressed and now have to live with it.

This. It probably looked like you had nothing on down there, and it's just a misunderstanding. It would probably make me feel uncomfortable too if that's the impression I had.

[Karren H]

Right or wrong.... Since you are part of her work environment... Her not feeling comfortable around you... Giver her every right to file a complaint with her boss..... Imho.

[JoanAz]

I gave her a letter of apology, also a copy to her supervisor.

Dear Post man/women:

I have to apologize to you for having inadvertently offended you with my manner of dress.
I like to wear “short shorts” , sometimes the Long T-shirts extend beyond the bottom of the shorts.
If when you are delivering a package & I happen to be wearing shorts, I will stay behind my front door.
If you have a complaint on delivering anything to my home please let me know, (I will not be offended)
J*** F***
(ADDRESS)
PS I have always enjoyed the short conversation with you when receiving a delivery

THE SHORT CONVERSATION is how's the Weather treating you, have a Good Day, drive carefully, etc.

[UNDERDRESSER]

I gave her a letter of apology, also a copy to her supervisor.

Dear Post man/women:

I have to apologize to you for having inadvertently offended you with my manner of dress.
I like to wear “short shorts” , sometimes the Long T-shirts extend beyond the bottom of the shorts.
If when you are delivering a package & I happen to be wearing shorts, I will stay behind my front door.
If you have a complaint on delivering anything to my home please let me know, (I will not be offended)
J*** F***
(ADDRESS)
PS I have always enjoyed the short conversation with you when receiving a delivery

THE SHORT CONVERSATION is how's the Weather treating you, have a Good Day, drive carefully, etc.Maybe that will help.

Without seeing how you were dressed, i can't say whether she had any particular reason to be offended or fearful. I have met my postwoman in a dressing gown, ( male ) and more often, brief running shorts and t-shirt. The shorts show a LOT of shaved leg, but there is no way I can get a t-shirt long enough to drop below the bottom of the shorts, so it's clear I am wearing shorts. She hasn't seemed to be bothered by it.

[Trish]

Maybe, with the shirt comming below the shorts, it looks as you had no pants on. That is what I picture by your discription.

[DeeArel]

My SO used to work for USPS. They do not have to deliver if they feel uncomfortable.

[Kate Simmons]

The bottom line is you cannot "make" someone do something they don't want to do. The carrier can exercise her preference without tampering with the mail by leaving the notice. I get many packages from different companies and it's quite obvious they are female items and I also have a female mail route person. She has never complained but then again, I have never gotten the packages from her en femme either. That may change soon though.:)

[Rachel Morley]

It's one of those "rules" ... you know, restaurants don't have to seat you, bars don't have to serve you and mail companies don't have to deliver to you. As others have said I think she thought you had either nothing on at all under your tee, or for sure she thought you were not wearing shorts. I can see how she might think that. You were in boy mode right? - I bet she saw you were a guy, and in her mind, guys don't wear short shorts, and so she just assumed you can't be wearing anything and she felt uncomfortable.

Your letter might help, but IMO it all depends on what sort of a person she is :(

[linda allen]

The bottom line is you cannot "make" someone do something they don't want to do.

In many, if not most cases, an employer can "make" an employee do something they may not want to do as long as it's part of their job description and not unsafe. For example a janitor can be "made" to empty the garbage cans. Delivering packages to recipients is part of a postal worker's job description.

It's unfortunate that in this case, the female delivery person seems to be afraid of the OP for some reason and the postmaster has chosen to back her up. Personally, I think this is unreasonable. A person going door to door delivering things should expect to see "strange" behavior from time to time. It's part of the job.

If I were the OP, I would not have raced after the postal worker and stopped her, that only gave her more reson to fear the OP. I would have complained in writing to the postmaster about my packages not being delivered and demanded a response (in writing). After receiving the response, I would have challenged it, demanded that my packages be delivered to my door in the future, and copied my elected representatives in the US Congress on all correspondence.

[BobbieBrooks]

neither rain nor shorts. Sorry snow. will keep the mail from being delivered. LOL I would show the postmaster what was worn, and go from there. In AZ seems that with the heat there, what was being worn should not be a problem. Would suggest also what Linda as said. I think SHE has the problem and showing the postmaster what was worn might end the problem. I would march into the post office and show them, wearing the same outfit.

BobbieB

[Sara Jessica]

I have to side with the mail carrier. Her perception is her reality, that she is going to the door where a guy appears to be running around in a long t-shirt, perhaps with no underwear. It's creepy to her and she exercised her right not to be creeped-out on the job. The only thing the Postal Service could have done better is to communicate at the beginning as to the change in mail delivery and the reason why.

[sometimes_miss]

I'm going to try not to read too much into this; but for whatever reason, the woman delivering the package seems to be very uncomfortable with the concept of you in female clothing. Perhaps she was assaulted by some guy who was dressed like a female when she was young; most people who were molested never tell anyone. It's a big world, and all kinds of possibilities. Maybe let her know it's o.k. to leave the package on the front step; my ups guy used to leave the dreaded 'missed you' slip; then I explained, he gave me a few and I just sign them in advance, stick it on the inside of the storm window and he leaves it inside my storm door. Maybe she can do that. Most people are flexible; works something out where both of you can be comfortable with the situation.

[Stephanie47]

I did not see anywhere in the thread where the OP was stating he was wearing female attire. Not knowing the history of the female letter carrier, we really do not know her past experiences. She very well could have encountered 'flashers' on her route.

If I were a letter carrier and a young woman answered the door dressed in the same manner, I would not have complained.

[RiverdanceGirl]

Is it really logical to assume that somebody wearing a long t-shirt must be naked underneath and therefore a pervert? That certainly would not be my assumption. Perhaps that person was on their way to the backyard pool when the doorbell rang. Not everybody swims in knee shorts. Definitely if I saw shaved legs I'd think 'competitive swimmer' and not 'potential flasher'. Chasing after her was probably not the best idea though. But seriously, is this the kind of world we live in that we interact harmlessly with a person and then report them to our boss as being possibly dangerous? Sure if the OP was accidentally on purpose letting the t-shirt ride up to expose nakkie genitalia then yes, but that didn't happen. I worked in retail for many years and if I had refused to serve a customer, or treated them differently on the grounds that I had no proof thay were wearing underwear I would have been dismissed on the spot.

[Mistybtm]

I really think that the postal woman should have not complained you did nothing wrong you should not have to be restricted the way you dress in your own home to receive a package that you paid to have shipped to you. When I here SH## like this it realy pisses me off sounds like the postal working is being lazzy and just wants an easy way out

[Sometimes Steffi]

It's one of those "rules" ... you know, restaurants don't have to seat you, bars don't have to serve you and mail companies don't have to deliver to you.(

I don't want to hijack this thread, and I am not a lawyer, but restaurants do need to seat your and bars do need to serve you (if you're over the drinking age and not obviously intoxicated). I think it's called the Civil Rights Act of 1964, and restaurants and bars are "public accomodations".

[GaleWarning]

I don't want to hijack this thread, and I am not a lawyer, but restaurants do need to seat your and bars do need to serve you (if you're over the drinking age and not obviously intoxicated). I think it's called the Civil Rights Act of 1964, and restaurants and bars are "public accomodations".

Here in NZ bars and restaurants can disbar a customer if s/he is inappropriately dressed. They must display a notice which reads, "Right of Admission Reserved". It also covers intoxication etc.

Apropos the topic, I side with the postal worker.

[linda allen]

I have to side with the mail carrier. Her perception is her reality, that she is going to the door where a guy appears to be running around in a long t-shirt, perhaps with no underwear. It's creepy to her and she exercised her right not to be creeped-out on the job. The only thing the Postal Service could have done better is to communicate at the beginning as to the change in mail delivery and the reason why.
If the mail carrier is that easily offended or "creeped out", she is in the wrong line of work.

The OP has a right to have his packages delivered just like anyone else and as long as the OP isn't doing anything illegal, the postal worker needs to "suck it up" and do her job. Suppose she was a nurse. Could she refuse to treat a male with painted nails?

And her boss should see to it that she does her job, which is delivering the mail and packages. Or, he/she can transfer this person to a job where there's more controlled interaction with the public.

[Sara Jessica]

If the mail carrier is that easily offended or "creeped out", she is in the wrong line of work.

The OP has a right to have his packages delivered just like anyone else and as long as the OP isn't doing anything illegal, the postal worker needs to "suck it up" and do her job. Suppose she was a nurse. Could she refuse to treat a male with painted nails?

And her boss should see to it that she does her job, which is delivering the mail and packages. Or, he/she can transfer this person to a job where there's more controlled interaction with the public.

I'm sure that letter carriers have quite a bit of latitude when it comes to this kind of thing given the level of public interaction and that they are in close proximity to potential harm, technically at every home they deliver to. I would imagine they are trained to recognize dangerous situations and to avoid them and likewise, they are likely encouraged to report anything that makes them feel uncomfortable. A barking dog is a good example. If the dog snarls at every delivery and perhaps is a breed that is known to be dangerous, then that postal customer is going to be picking up all of their mail at the post office.

That said, an entity such as this will always err on the side of caution when it comes to safety and harassment. We cannot say what the letter carrier was thinking as we don't have her side of the story other than the fact she told OP that she was uncomfortable with his manner of presentation when he would take delivery of packages. That is really all that matters. Our opinions mean nothing. It can be said repeatedly that she should suck it up and do her job but at the end of the day, she was offended.

[sterling12]

Pragmatic Approach:

If you haven't been cut-off from your mail service already. I would,
A.) Apologize again.
B.) In the future, Modify your dress.
C.) Don't give her any reason to lodge further complaints against you.

Now, plenty of people have already argued that this isn't harassment, and that you are being "railroaded." so you should stand up for your Rights. I wouldn't disagree with any of those people! But, I am offering you a practical alternative, so that you don't lose your home delivery.

Hey, The Choice is yours. You'll have to decide how much of a Pain in The Rectum is involved with running down to The Post Office, wasting gas, waiting in line, getting hassled at the counter, and losing valuable time out of your day. Sometimes, we have to eat some crow, just to survive. No it isn't fair, but it's Their Deck of Cards, and they control The Game Board. How much do you want to lose?

Peace and Love, Joanie

[suchacutie]

I rather amazed that the carrier was that sensitive. I'd love to know what became of your apology letter!

[SANDRA MICHELLE]

Thin skinned people really frost me! If it is as you stated and nothing could be seen then there can be no legitimate reason to not provide you the service that everyone else gets. I for one do not ever put up with any BS and I don't give out any BS. I really believe that they owe you a much better explanation and they should let you respond to the formal complaint this carrier lodged against you. You have been found guilty by the postal service and you have never been able to defend yourself. I see only bad things happening if you fail to defend yourself. What if, just hypothetically you got identified mistakenly in a line up as the person that flashed a group of children, and they brought this postal worker in along with her boss and they said they have had problems with you as well?????? Do you get my meaning??? Thats why I don't accept any BS cause shit happens.

[Marleena]

IDK I see the postal service holding your mail hostage because a letter carrier might not like how you were dressed. How much power do the employees have?

UPS drivers are mentioned on here as seeing CD's dressed in various manners and never flinching.

[GaleWarning]

I work in an industry where our employees visit homes. In training, we emphasise that if they feel any discomfort at all they are to leave and report the incident to a supervisor. The issue for our company is the occupational health and safety of our employee, not the whimsical peculiarities of a householder.

While it may be true that some of us are "harder" than others (a few days ago I, too, found myself in a very strange situation from which I gently extricated myself!) we will never force an employee to go to a house where they feel uncomfortable.

I'd love to know what became of your letter of apology. I'm not sure how I as a supervisor would handle the situation. Perhaps I might discuss the implications of the letter with the worker concerned. But if she still refused to return, I would not force her. I would probably put her on another delivery route. But the new posty would be warned to report any problems at your home.

The sad thing from your point of view is that your address now has a mark against it. Perhaps it is not justified, but that is just the way it is.

[Michelia]

I am am glad I do not live in Arizona!

[Peta_T]

You know reading some of the comments on this thread makes me glad I live in Australia. Here we have "Anti_Discrimination" laws that state that a person cannot be treated differently based on there Race, Religion, Gender or Sexual Orientation.

Basically that means that the postal worker would be in strife if she was refusing to deliver your mail based on what you were wearing at the time. Of course if your were just wearing a lace g-string and nothing else, you would be the one in trouble. The indecency law would take precedence.

The point is regardless of you wearing shorts/shirt, jeans/t-shirt, skirt/blouse, dress or any combination of the above. If you are decently covered here in Oz, the delivery person has no reason to complain.

Peta

[Sara Jessica]

I rather amazed that the carrier was that sensitive.


Thin skinned people really frost me!

Harassment Training 101 - Perception of harassment (or discomfort in a situation) varies tremendously by individual. What you or I might not blink an eye at could cause significant distress in another person.


I work in an industry where our employees visit homes. In training, we emphasise that if they feel any discomfort at all they are to leave and report the incident to a supervisor. The issue for our company is the occupational health and safety of our employee, not the whimsical peculiarities of a householder.

While it may be true that some of us are "harder" than others...we will never force an employee to go to a house where they feel uncomfortable.

Right on, right on, right on!

[Marleena]

Quite a divide on this one.lol.

Here's what I would have done here in Canada. I would have demanded a reason for the delivery problem. I would have went higher up the chain of command and absolutely no apology. I would go to the local postal center that we have in our city dressed the way the OP was when said issue surfaced so they could see for themselves there was no nudity. I would need to see in writing how my being dressed could cause a disruption in service. If they could prove there was an actual problem and not a perceived one I would then pick up any packages that could not go into my mailbox. I find it absurd that the average citizen needs a dress code imposed on them in order to receive their mail.

Just my opinion.

[linda allen]

Quite a divide on this one.lol.

Here's what I would have done here in Canada. I would have demanded a reason for the delivery problem. I would have went higher up the chain of command and absolutely no apology. I would go to the local postal center that we have in our city dressed the way the OP was when said issue surfaced so they could see for themselves there was no nudity. I would need to see in writing how my being dressed could cause a disruption in service. If they could prove there was an actual problem and not a perceived one I would then pick up any packages that could not go into my mailbox. I find it absurd that the average citizen needs a dress code imposed on them in order to receive their mail.

Just my opinion.
And it's an opinion that I agree with 100%.

[Michelia]

I cannot believe there are so many of us agreeing with this postal worker with a case of transphobia over what apparently was a minor issue. How are we ever going to educate people and be able to be free from discrimination? This postal worker needs to be educated by her employer. And so do many other employees at other employers!

[Sara Jessica]

I find it absurd that the average citizen needs a dress code imposed on them in order to receive their mail.

People in the workforce have a right not to be forced to perform their jobs in a hostile environment.

I'm simply playing devil's advocate here. All we know is that postal worker was offended and the issue was resolved in a manner that was apparently within her rights.

Would the scenario be seen differently if OP was answering the door for packages in a long t-shirt with nothing underneath?

Wait, how is female postal worker supposed to know what is underneath the t-shirt?


I normally wear Short Shorts / Speedo type around the house with a LONG T-Shirt over them that comes down well below the bottom of the Sorts.

See what I mean?

This isn't typical for how dudes dress (and we're not even talking trans here, see below) and I can see why the postal worker perceived this the way she did. Sorry but she likely perceived a pervert.

Besides, what's wrong with a little decorum when answering the door?


I cannot believe there are so many of us agreeing with this postal worker with a case of transphobia over what apparently was a minor issue. How are we ever going to educate people and be able to be free from discrimination? This postal worker needs to be educated by her employer. And so do many other employees at other employers!

I don't see this as a trans issue in the least bit. Nowhere is it stated that OP is presenting in female clothing, nor presenting as female with makeup, wig, etc. All I see in the picture painted by OP is a guy answering the door repeatedly in a speedo and a long t-shirt.

[Marleena]

Okay.. I don't need anybody else to help me make my point it's not really that important to me.:) A clearer policy needs to be in place IMHO or it's open to employee abuse of power.

Anyways here are some scenarios to ponder.

1. I go to my door dressed enfemme she asks me am I so and so. My male voice gives me away..

2. I'm in the shower and hear somebody at the door. I throw on a bath robe to answer the door.

3. I'm in my pool I hear the door. I jump out and answer in swimming trunks. or swimming trucks with a long t-shirt over it.

Depending on the carriers mood or decision making I could be denied service for any of the above scenarios.

Lastly whatever happened to the: Dear Homeowner on such and such a date our letter carrier advised us she felt uncomfortable by the way you were dressed. She will not deliver to your place of residence effective immediately. Please contact: so and so if you do not agree with this decision.

[EllieOPKS]

I don't know of a male or female delivery person that would not be uncomfortable seeing somebody that appears to have on just a T shirt. Personally, if I saw the speedos it would probably be even worse feeling. With that being said, you haven't really done anything that's wrong. If you walked down the street and a cop stopped you, you would not be cited for indecent exposure. But, as with any situation that is controversial, it's easy enough to defuse by being more modest about appearance when answering the door. Or you can go to the post office to pick up your parcels from now on.

[Barbara Ella]

As I read the OP, and then the individual posts, I do not think this has to do with dressing in female clothing. I would not want to deliver to someone who was presenting as just wearing a long t shirt. She might have been friendly with you, but felt you sere attempting to take friendship too far by being perceived as almost naked in her mind. I agree there should be more of an explanation given to the OP, and delivery reinstated after explanations. Being uncomfortable with an almost naked customer cannot be used when there is no nakedness, and the delivery person will have to toughen up a bit and put the sight out of her mind. Dont really feel there is any issue here with presenting female.

Barbara

[UNDERDRESSER]

Eh, this is getting tricky. Can the OP post a pic of the offending outfit(s)?


As others have said, I don't see it as a transphobe problem, could be wrong. It seems the postwoman thought there was nothing on underneath, and thought the OP was being deliberately creepy, which would, for me, constitute harassment. NOT saying the OP was harassing, just that was the appearance to the postwoman. If this is so, and she believes the apology, that should fix it.

I've once answered the door with nothing but a towel, and dripping wet, the posty apologized and laughed it off, of course I was standing behind the door, not "displaying," this stuff happens, you know?

[Sam-antha]

Why, in the name of the wee man did she have to lie ? Why did she not tell her boss why the deliveries for yo were piling up at the office ? Was she afraid of her boss ? Was her boss afraid to notify you that there was a denial of service in his neck of the woods ?

~Samm

[Marleena]

I'm going to call this thread "the great divide".lol.

CDing was not at all an issue in original post, I threw it in as a what if circumstance. Anyways I'm out of this one since it's been beat to death.:)

[GaleWarning]

We still don't know what happened to the letter of apology. Was it ever sent to the post office? What was the reaction? Have postal deliveries resumed? By the original postie or a new one?

[Confetti]

Nope...you did not do anything wrong.
I got into it when they claimed to have left a slip and never did. The item was for a wedding which was there they just did not want to check needless to say it was customer service looking for me to cuss. I find lately it's any excuse not to work she should thank you for the business .

[GaleWarning]

Nope...you did not do anything wrong.


Those of us who side with the postie have never claimed that the OP did something wrong.

It seems to me that those who side with the OP are caught up in that person's wants/needs/rights.

On the other hand, I am more concerned about the lack of consideration shown by the OP for the OSH needs and rights of the postie. Seems irresponsible to me!

[~Joanne~]

I cannot believe there are so many of us agreeing with this postal worker with a case of transphobia over what apparently was a minor issue. How are we ever going to educate people and be able to be free from discrimination? This postal worker needs to be educated by her employer. And so do many other employees at other employers!

I agree with this. In america 2012 we have all sorts of different people. So if a female hates male she doesn't have to deliver the mail to their houses? how about gay people? the list can go on and on. I truly can see the point others make though that the OP looked to only have a Tshirt on and not much more. Makes me wonder why the OP wears the same outfit all the time too lol Would the mail person also have filed the same complaint if she would have had a dress and heels on?

It surely sound like discrimination to me. CD's have rights too it all comes down to do you know your rights? and are you willing to fight for them even in the simplest matters? This also leads me to agree with marlenna and her solution to the situation though I find I agree with her an awful lot ;).





On the other hand, I am more concerned about the lack of consideration shown by the OP for the OSH needs and rights of the postie. Seems irresponsible to me!

Not to start a verbal war with you or anything BUT if we went by this statement alone, then none of us should ever leave the closet dressed or walk out the front door.

[Sara Jessica]

Those of us who side with the postie have never claimed that the OP did something wrong.

Correct.


It seems to me that those who side with the OP are caught up in that person's wants/needs/rights.

Really, OP or anyone else who has their mail delivered doesn't have that as a "right". See my pet dog example above if you want a really good reason why someone might find themselves compelled to pick up their mail daily from the post office.


On the other hand, I am more concerned about the lack of consideration shown by the OP for the OSH needs and rights of the postie. Seems irresponsible to me!

Right on the mark Clayfish.

When a business engages the public, it is not typical that said public presents themselves in a manner which could be deemed offensive.

We're not talking trans here. Again, there is NOTHING in the OP which suggests this is remotely a trans issue.

We're talking about a dude answering the door repeatedly in a long t-shirt with God-knows-what underneath.

Does the WalMart checker have to deal with that.

Wait, don't answer that....I've heard about those WalMart customer YouTube videos.

Would OP walk into a restaurant in nothing but a long t-shirt? How about a grocery store? Movie theater (think Pee Wee Herman here)?

OP admits to presenting this way repeatedly. Would anyone here want their daughters to be exposed to that daily? I think it's fair to assume that anyone who condones a MAN answering the door REPEATEDLY wearing a long t-shirt which leaves what's underneath to the IMAGINATION is suggesting that their own daughter, the mail carrier, should be exposed to that daily.

I wouldn't condone it in the least bit.

I'm approaching this from two points of view. Decorum, which is not to be construed as being prudish. It's simply decency. And the other is from a business human resource standpoint which is a field that I am somewhat well-versed in. Anyone can argue for the "rights" of OP. You will all come out on the wrong end of the argument. Postie (as Clayfish put it) has rights which trumps OP's desire to have his mail delivered, simple as that.

[Kat42]

IANAL so this isn't legal advice. It's just what I've learned dealing with people who promise the world and deliver zip.

1st line of action in a situation like this is to DOCUMENT EVERYTHING! Start today with a written record of what has happened to date. What was said, who was involved, what happened and when (dates and times). log anyone you talk to, write down your recollections of what was said and any promises of action. That way you have a record to refer when disputes arise.

When you answer their "we never said that" you can answer with chapter and verse (date, time and a name).

Getting stuff in writing (certified mail, etc is even better) But at the very least, document your contacts.

$.02
Kat

[Bea A]

I work for the Postal Service... start with a phone call asking.. "I'd like to make an appointment to meet with the Postmaster". Then explain from there. Do not stop until the issue is resolved.

[Kaz]

In the UK we have had for many years a national postal service that was appointed by the crown and had strict regulatory laws attached. It was always respected and well loved. Then of course the lunatics took over. These days I often don't get the mail I was sent.

There is never an apology and some of my friends have been taken to court over things they 'should have' received but didn't, and so could not respond to.

We are living in a world that is starting to resemble the end of the Roman era... a general breakdown in the ability (and even willingness) of the state to maintain essential services...