How Do You Classify Yourself?

[Julie]

What category fits you best?


Transvestic Fetish: You find sexual arousal in items of clothing, but do not fully dress as a woman.
Crossdresser: You enjoy dressing fully as a woman but are happy with your life as a male.
Transgender: You feel the desire to live as a woman but also need to live as a man.
Transsexual: You wish to transition to female and have no desire to live as a male.

[TGMarla]

Hmmm....this one's actually a toughie. See, I crossdress, but I also find myself on a daily basis thinking often what it would be like to be a woman in this world, to greet each day as a female, and to interact with people as a woman. I think how unfair it is that this gender "gift" has come into my life, and become such a big part of it, all the while being denied the societal right to present as I would really like to, as a woman.

Yet, I have a full life as a man. I am very active, enjoy tools, golf, sports. I have many interests that are primarily male-oriented. That's not to say that there aren't women in the world who hold these same interests, but the truth is that they are things that men are interested in a whole lot more than women are.

So........crossdresser or transgendered....in between? I'd love to live as a woman, but I need to live as a man. There. Transgendered. Wait, I changed my mind again.....oh, whatever.

[Deborah]

I chose transsexual as i wish i was born a girl. I don't think i'll ever go through with it transitioning though for many reasons. If there is such thing as reincarnation hopefully i'll get lucky next time. :D

[cdaleli]

It took me a while to firgure it out.. but in the end I love to be fully dressed, but love my life as is.

[Angela Burke]

Most definitely a crossdresser.
I'm heterosexual, I love women, and I'm happy being Andy.
I also love wearing womens' clothing and trying (with varying degrees of success) to create a feminine appearance.
When I'm in drag I'm happy being Angela.
I can't remember not feeling this way.
And I can't imagine not feeling like this.

Love Angela XX

(And a kiss from Andy as well even though I'm wearing a blouse and skirt!)

[DawnRodgers]

My outlook had changed over the years as I have goyyen better at dressing and make-up. Also have had an ongoing brain change as things I would have not considered applicable to me now seem perfectlY normaL. It started out as as a fetish, using just nylons and hees and panties. Then I became a crossdresser as I used cosmetics, a bra with breast forms, full clothing, jewelry, perfume, nail polidh and a ewig. At that time I would have considered myself a crossdresser. After a while i started I started using toys and fantasies to simulate sexual situations, and lastly, my present state transgender. When dressed I fully consider myself feminine and want everything a woman can do and feel. Going out, entertaining, being the best woman I can be. I think it is too late for transexual now. If I were younger and knowing what I do know - both in attitude, experience, mind set and what is available out there in the world I would definitely be transgender. I would love and enjoy living full time as a woman.
Dawn

[Helana]

Interestingly no fetishists out there. I guess they would find little use in a forum like ours. It would be interesting to also correlate this with age and also freedom of expression. I believe the freer we are to explore our TG side the more we are drawn into it and develop stronger emotional ties with our better half.

[simonep]

I think we are here just quieter in this forum.. :rolleyes:

Intrigued by the full extent of the the spectrum.

[mellisa]

I do not dress to be a woman, but to enjoy the looks and feel of the fabric of women's clothes. Ijust think it is wrong that society thinks it's OK that women can wear anything, and men cannot. My wife loves me and accepts everything about me. Putting on a dress, nylons,pumps, and lots of jewelry is fun and very relaxing, very very relaxing!!! I dress with good fashion sense, and look good as a man in a dress. I hope someday I can go to the store in a nice long, comfy skirt and sandels with pink toe nails. Didn't realize I wasn't a crossdresser. Never heard of the fetish category. Let me know what you girls think, Mellisa

[Sophie_A]

I used to think of myself as a cross dresser, but over the years the more i dress the more i long to be sophie all the time, so i guess this makes me a transsexual, im even starting talking to the doctor about this issue.

[Gemma Rhodes]

Hmmm....this one's actually a toughie. See, I crossdress, but I also find myself on a daily basis thinking often what it would be like to be a woman in this world, to greet each day as a female, and to interact with people as a woman. I think how unfair it is that this gender "gift" has come into my life, and become such a big part of it, all the while being denied the societal right to present as I would really like to, as a woman.

Yet, I have a full life as a man. I am very active, enjoy tools, golf, sports. I have many interests that are primarily male-oriented. That's not to say that there aren't women in the world who hold these same interests, but the truth is that they are things that men are interested in a whole lot more than women are.

So........crossdresser or transgendered....in between? I'd love to live as a woman, but I need to live as a man. There. Transgendered. Wait, I changed my mind again.....oh, whatever.

I couldn't have put my feelings down better Marla.

Gemma xx

[Sally Gray]

It is quite a tough question this as the others have already said.

After my thought I have voted as a cross dresser...though bordering on transgender!

[Cathy J]

Hi everyone,

I'm happily a "Crossdresser", am glad I'm a male and I love women. I wouldn't want to be a gg except as a temporary thing just to really see and feel what being a woman is all about. :p :p As if we will ever know what they're all about.

I love getting fully dressed whenever the opportunity arises, even if only for an hour or two.

Love, Cathy

[Jasmine Ellis]

I'm just a cross dresser, who loves women's clothes more than man's! Yes I waer a long wig at home and out side even at work. I'm not gay, never had a man in bed never been looking for one! May be the next time I come bacit will be as a wonderful woman.........Please God!!

[Amelie]

I voted, "I don't know"

The closest label that fits my lifestyle would be "Travesti". I have known a few Travestis and they seem to have similar traits to me.

[Wendy me]

i voted i don't know...see i soooooooo know that i have this huge fem side (supprized??) and i got this "him" side, one thing veary clear to me is it is true that i love being wendy (it's realy me) but somehow that "him" side dose fit in now .. see i spent so much time just trying to hide my fem side that i grew to hate the "him" side. then i spent so much time loveing my fem side once i let her out . at one time i thought that the only way to be happy was to just get rid of "him", that caused so much conflict that i thought ok the best thing i can do is get rid of my fem side ...i mean what was i ?? was i a cd? was i a tg?? was i a tv?? or could i be a ts?? all too confuseing for me....
perhaps i was just a freak....after a long time of trying to find the right lable something that i could fit in right .. could i be totaly happy just being "him"? no way. would i be happy just being her?? who knows ...maybe icould maybe i would not be... then when i decided that i was not happy with any of them lables i thought why not just be me??? omg that simple just be me so thats what i am me and that makes me happy....dose that sound right????

[Veronica E. Scott]

I am a crossdresser I like dressing as a woman and wearing different outfits there is no way that I would pass but I try to give it my best shot.
For the most part I also am happy in my male body I don't like the turmoil that my dressing has caused but you have to live with the good and the bad nothing in life is fair or easy.

[Stephanie]

Based on the definitions provided, I suppose that I would have to say that I'm a "Crossdresser" because I definitely enjoy fully dressing up like a woman on a more or less regular basis but I have no desire to LIVE as a woman (part-time or full-time) or actually become a woman (SRS). However, I also define myself as "Transgendered" because, psychologically, I don't consider myself to be male or female. Also, I define myself as "Transgendered" to express solidarity, both socially and politically, with other individuals like myself.

[KatieZ]

What category fits you best?


Crossdresser: You enjoy dressing fully as a woman but are happy with your life as a male.
Transgender: You feel the desire to live as a woman but also need to live as a man.


That was a tough choice. Earlier in life I would have easily picked crossdresser but as I get older and more comfortable with it I have an increasing desire to spend as much time as possible as a woman.
I chose transgender.


Hugs

[Stormgirl]

je ne sais pa

[TVStevie]

I'm somewhere between TF & CD, I think. I do go so far as to wear a full ensemble, but I never try to pass or go out dressed as a woman. However, I do sometimes fantasise about being female, but that's a purely sexual thing. In everyday life, I'm completely happy to be male.

[Andi-Girl]

This was a hard question, but a good one. I had to think about my overall life and right now, I am still happy to live as a man. That does not mean that I have not wondered what it would be like to live as a GG. The woman inside me is still emerging and becoming her own "persona".
So what am I? A crossderesser or transgendered? I vote Crossdresser, but I am probally both right now.
Andi

[Jenny Beth]

I voted transgender, it's the closest to how I feel about myself. However I don't feel the "need" to be man, it's more like I have resigned myself to being one because at my age it's a little late to start life over and try to make a living as a woman but mostly because I have a wonderful partner that I would probably loose. I'm not obsessed with the thought of transitioning so I am definitely not TS.

[Jerri]

transsexual is now I would name myself

[michellejean]

i am a crossdresser.but #1 is apart of me and# 3 is apart of me also.

[Lisa Marie]

I voted for Crossdresser. Cause most of the time I am dressed as a male. Every now and then I love to dress up and think of being beautiful. One day I would love to try being a woman for a day. But dont think thats going to happen. Angie

[Kimberly]

Crossdresser... I think it sounds the nicest. :)

But I'm verging on transgender now, (since I have a bigger wardrobe the urge has gotten bigger to live as a woman.)

xx

[Kim E]

Hi Julie ~
A fairly easy question but a complicated answer.
Since my youth I always thought I was born the wrong gender. At puberty, the emotional and physical changes were so great, I became convinced I was TS, and I still feel that way.

To survive in the world and to please everyone else, I had to be TG and have lived most of my life that way.

Over a period of time I went the rounds of counselors, therapists and an endocrinologist. They all concurred that I was TS. I could start HRT whenever I choose. I still see a therapist on occasion when I need to talk to someone who understands me.

Here's where it gets complicated. I live about 85% of my life as female. But there is about 15%, I can't shake. I still have to be male to deal with some of life's issues. For example: my young grandkids love and idolize their 'pa', I can't traumatize them; frequent treatments at the hospital; times like jury duty, etc. But still in my heart, mind, soul and body I still feel I am TS, as much as I did when I was 12. Its like being in 'limbo', but I had to vote TS.

I hope this all makes some kind of sense.

Hugs ~ Kim

[Christina Nicole]

Hi! I'm new here.

I'm TS. Some doubt about that, I guess. If I had known more about this when I was in my 20s, I probably would have transitioned then.

[Julie York]

Wow what a wonderfully biased poll.

"So are you a sicko pervert?......Or a nice girl who NEVER gets excited dressing fully as a woman?....(Oooh or EVEN better)....Transgendered?!!!"

Thanks Julie. Thanks a bundle. I feel so s**t about myself now I am going right back in the closet I came out of a year ago. Well done. Brilliant job.


:thumbsdn: .

(What's the definition of "crossdresser" anyone?)

[Amelie]

Wow what a wonderfully biased poll.

"So are you a sicko pervert?......Or a nice girl who NEVER gets excited dressing fully as a woman?....(Oooh or EVEN better)....Transgendered?!!!"

Thanks Julie. Thanks a bundle. I feel so s**t about myself now I am going right back in the closet I came out of a year ago. Well done. Brilliant job.


:thumbsdn: .

(What's the definition of "crossdresser" anyone?)


I am a nice girl who never gets excited when dressed,, it is the men that I am with that get excited when I am dressed.


Julie, please don't go back to the closet, I need you here, I need to hear your words.
Please
Amelie
xxx

[Adele 2005]

Inside I'm a confused mess struggling to find my identity! I'm just starting to try and unmuddle these thoughts and emotions that I've fought against for so long, and I'm lost. I know my family, friends, and colleagues would probably be shocked if they could see what a facade the happy-go-lucky male persona I project really is, or read this.

I would love to be female, and that desire has never been for kicks (I would never have understood or felt that as a child anyway when I started to become aware of this conflict of mind and body). I always felt angry and frustrated that nature was cruel giving me this damn body, even as a child. Why did this have to happen to me? Now I get depressed by what I look like as an adult: 6' 6", massive hands and feet and this horrible voice - I look like a freak as a man, and doubly so when en femme! There's no way with any amount of surgery or drugs that I could ever be accepted as female. It would be unbearably soul destroying to be lost in some sort of social purgatory like that. I just can't imagine that desire ever being more than a wishful dream. So, here I am: reaching out into the unknown, trying to find some guidance, some way to contentment, but not really knowing what that is or how to get there. :confused:

OMG, I feel depressed now!

Sorry!

[Bonnie D]

Hmmm....this one's actually a toughie. See, I crossdress, but I also find myself on a daily basis thinking often what it would be like to be a woman in this world, to greet each day as a female, and to interact with people as a woman. I think how unfair it is that this gender "gift" has come into my life, and become such a big part of it, all the while being denied the societal right to present as I would really like to, as a woman.

Yet, I have a full life as a man. I am very active, enjoy tools, golf, sports. I have many interests that are primarily male-oriented. That's not to say that there aren't women in the world who hold these same interests, but the truth is that they are things that men are interested in a whole lot more than women are.

So........crossdresser or transgendered....in between? I'd love to live as a woman, but I need to live as a man. There. Transgendered. Wait, I changed my mind again.....oh, whatever.

I'm with Marla on this one,

I voted 'crossdresser' because that is what I do. I have a feminine being inside me and would love to live the rest of my life as a woman. However, I am a man and do enjoy doing masculine things. I would give it up in a minute if I could suddenly become a woman though but that's not likely to happen. So what am I really?

Bonnie

[Lauren_T]

Wow what a wonderfully biased poll.

"So are you a sicko pervert?......Or a nice girl who NEVER gets excited dressing fully as a woman?....(Oooh or EVEN better)....Transgendered?!!!"

Thanks Julie. Thanks a bundle. I feel so s**t about myself now I am going right back in the closet I came out of a year ago. Well done. Brilliant job.


:thumbsdn: .

(What's the definition of "crossdresser" anyone?)Oh, Julie Julie Julie... Come along.

The word 'fetish' is not an insult, it implies no value judgement, either positive or negative. It's semantically neutral. I mean! Really, it's just a description, now idnit?

I reread Julie's post stem-to-stern, and for the life of me, I couldn't find the words 'sicko', 'pervert' or 'nice' anywhere in it! You're seeing some kind of value judgement there that the rest of us seem to have missed... :eek:

Julie meant no insult or judgement - that would be wildly out of character for her, which makes it extremely unlikely; so dontcha think you might be being just the weeest bit oversensitive... hmm? :itsok: Oversensitivity is an occupational hazard for us CDs; happens to a lot of us, yrs trly included... :o

[Kimberly]

Wow what a wonderfully biased poll.

"So are you a sicko pervert?......Or a nice girl who NEVER gets excited dressing fully as a woman?....(Oooh or EVEN better)....Transgendered?!!!"

Thanks Julie. Thanks a bundle. I feel so s**t about myself now I am going right back in the closet I came out of a year ago. Well done. Brilliant job.


:thumbsdn: .

(What's the definition of "crossdresser" anyone?)
Julie, you're one of the funniest, clever people I know on here - I need your wit! I don't care what you do whilst dressed... please stay :)

xxxxxxx

[TV_Allie]

Julie,
Nice question. Very provocative. I'd have to vote Transgendered. I started late in life and soon realized that I had a certain affinity(?) for expressing my female self. I can't even consider SRS as my wife would never go for it, and honestly I don't think I would want to do it. I'm borderline passable, from a distance, so I do enjoy going out enfemme from time to time, so that will have to do. My wife knows and supports, but I suspect that deep down she'd be just as happy if I never found this part of me.....but she does play with me, shop, dress, make up etc. In fact we have a big new years eve party planned so I guess I'm happy right where I am, happy and transgendered....

[jessbcuzz]

Gosh, that is a tough one. Like everyone else, it's a toss up. 1 and 2. I love to dress, but still need to be a male, but, always the but, I'd long to be able to go out into the world every now and then as a women.

[Marla GG]

1. Transvestic Fetish: You find sexual arousal in items of clothing, but do not fully dress as a woman.
2. Crossdresser: You enjoy dressing fully as a woman but are happy with your life as a male.
3. Transgender: You feel the desire to live as a woman but also need to live as a man.
4. Transsexual: You wish to transition to female and have no desire to live as a male.



I have to agree that there is a problem with the way this poll is constructed, because it seems to suggest that partial crossdressers are the only ones who get sexual gratification from dressing, and conversely, that those who dress fully en femme are not sexually motivated at all. What about the crossdressers, transgenderists, and yes even transsexuals, who feel sexy when dressed, at least some of the time? Why make sexuality part of the “transvestic fetish” category while conspicuously dissociating it from the others? It is obvious, to me anyway, that there is an implicit value judgment being made here. The subtext of perversion didn’t have to be spelled out in a culture where sex—even “normal” sex--is still a source of shame, and where sexual fetishes are by definition “deviant.” Crossdressers know they aren’t supposed to be turned on by putting on a pair of stockings. They have been conditioned from a very early age to hide the pleasure they get from dressing because it is wrong. So it’s no big surprise that not many members here are going to stand up and admit to being fetishists.

Obviously, the TG spectrum includes some individuals who crossdress for sexual reasons only, some who do so for nonsexual reasons only, and a great many who dress for both sexual pleasure and gender expression. The idea that crossdressing has nothing at all to do with sex is a myth, and I believe it hurts the members of our community more than it helps them. True, it is a myth perpetuated with the best of intentions by organizations whose goal is to make crossdressing seem less sleazy in the eyes of the general public, but at what cost? If you are a crossdresser who gets aroused by wearing women’s clothes, yet the mainstream literature tells you that crossdressing is not about sex, how are you going to feel? Ashamed at being told once again that you are “abnormal”? Confused because the propaganda you are being fed does not match your own experience?

I’ll tell you how wives and girlfriends feel. In the eight years or so that I’ve been involved in the online crossdressing community, I’ve spoken with plenty of genetic women who are in relationships with crossdressers, and guess what? Most of them know that their men get a sexual kick out of dressing. It isn’t that hard to figure out! But when they go looking for information and support from the major gender organizations, they are told that they are wrong, that crossdressers only want to get in touch with their feminine side and “express the woman within.” Uhuh. So why is it, they ask, that my husband gets excited when he puts on a pair of panties? Why does he spend hours reading fictionmania stories and surfing those websites that I am not supposed to know about? Why is it that he avoids being intimate with me and prefers to dress up and satisfy himself in private when I go out? “Well,” they are told by the gender authorities, “your husband must be one of those fetishistic transvestites. Not one of us.” So they join a women’s support group and talk to some other SOs about their private lives…and come to find out….nearly everyone seems to be married to a fetishistic transvestite! And that is when they start to get angry, because they realize they have been sold a bill of goods designed to make crossdressing more palatable, when in fact what they would have appreciated was a little honesty.

I don’t think that denying the erotic component of crossdressing helps anyone. Instead of trying to pretend it doesn’t exist, shouldn’t we really be working to destigmatize it? There is nothing sick or perverted about finding sexual pleasure in wearing women’s clothes and feeling feminine, but that message will fall on deaf ears as long as we stubbornly insist that sex is sex and crossdressing is crossdressing and never the twain shall meet.

[Nina]

But i have no idea how to classify myself.
Some days i'm happy just to dress now and then and live as a guy the rest of the time but other days i hate being male and don't even want to get out of bed like it.:confused:

I don't know Julie i don't think you can classify people we're all so different.

[Jocelyn Renee]

The closest category for me is "Transgender", but I really feel that a better description would be "Bi-Gender". The greatest role I play in my life is father and husband. Additionally, I have many strong male traits and just generally enjoy being male.

On the other side, I am not afraid to embrace my feminine traits and enjoy being female whenever I have the chance. The reality is that I could easily switch back and forth throughout the week and be perfectly happy. Mostly, I don't think about the labels and just enjoy being me.

Cheers,
Jocelyn

[Amelie]

Wow Marla(GG), that was some post. I really liked what you said and you said it so well.
Thanks for those thoughts, they are needed.
Amelie
xxx

[Julie York]

Ooh!...Nice one Marla!:thumbsup:

[Lilith Moon]

Like Marla said, which is why I couldn't respond to the poll.

[erica12b]

most of the time i feel im straight,but love to dress ,when im dressed then i start to think im tv its what a girl would think and do then back to man mode im strait its a tide thing now i think im JUST a cd (thats lonely)and thinks too much.....erica

[Kimberly]

:eek: <-- at Marla.

*Standing Ovation*

Woah... Couldn't have said it better myself. Yeh, I get turned on... after that post, I'd be the first to admit it.

Yet again, brought down to earth, thanks to the help of the GG community here. :D

Thanks Marla - appreciated. xx

[Shelly Preston]

My name says it all

[Adrianne]

I am a crossdresser, i love all things to do women's clothes but i still like being a man at times.

[Sarahgurl371]

I think Marla GG said it right. I conducted a brief poll here titled "is it sexual?" resultshttp://crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=17369,is the thread with the results. I was referred to a site called Yvonnes Place, that conducted a more in depth poll, and guess what, on both polls, the NEVER FOR SEXUAL PLEASURE group was a lot smaller than you would be lead to believe reading most CD literature.

I agree with Marla, we need to quit categorizing ourselves. How can we ever hope others will, if even among oursleves, we lump ourselves or others into some group. I know that for me it is very easy to try an categorize myself, to see if I am NORMAL. But the more that I read and learn, we are are abnormal, and I am not talking speciffically about us TV, CD, TG, TS folks. Humans are abnormal. PERIOD. We are so worried about ourselves and our own little set of "abnormalities", that we try to find others to make examples of - I am THIS, but at least I am not THAT!

As I mentioned in the results poll thread, I started to educate myself for my own acceptance, and kept reading that I was not a Normal CD, cuz yes, there is a sexual, sensual nature involved as well as the "getting in touch" side to my personality. I doubt that I could ever have a sensual, sexual encounter without it striking a chord to my femme side. I don't think I'd want to either, its who I am. I felt rejected by society in general, but then started to feel rejected by the wonderful people who happen to be TV, CD, TG, TS, because I can admit that there is this sexual side to my CDing. Why lie about it to myself? I am trying to understand and accept myself.

I understand that society probably wouldn't be as excepting as they are today of anyone with "abnormal" lifestyles, if the pioneers didn't take every but of sex that they could out of the mix. But we have to be careful not to alienate people who come here for support, and understanding, cuz we all can wink and nod at each other about the sex stuff, knowing about all the other polls and posts we've read here and elsewhere. I know I certainly have recieved offers to meet others for +?

I am not trying to Pi## anyone off here. If you don't feel the way I do, thats OK. Just stating my opinion. And you know what they say about opinions right? (They are just liks A$$^&*%$, everyone has one).:D

Personally, for me, It started in about 7 or 8 years old, too young for a sexual reason. No doubt during adolecense, there was definatley a sexual overtone. Now, once I have gotten past that, as I suspect many of us have, I have found there is so much more about this than sex. My therapist said that fetishes are a mask we put up because we don't want others to see whats really going on. I think there is alot of truth to that statement. What else could be going on behind the mask? HMMMM, I don't know, maybe feminine feelings and expressions, maybe "abnormal" sexuality?

Any way, I guess I have a little of every classification on this poll. Yes I do at times enjoy being a male, and at times I enjoy comming as close as I can to a female, and would love a way to switch back and forth and be fully either whenever I wanted. I don't think I ever will be 100% male or female. Maybe I need a new category all my own. Gender Interchanger?


WOW this was a long response! Sorry if I upset anyone, wasn't my intention!:) :) :)

[Jodi Lynn]

Like many others I would of answered CD many years ago, but as I have gotten older and have more of an understanding of myself I now answer TG.

[michelle19845]

i am mostly crossdresser,i can pry pass,but haven't gone out yet.transgendered has been strong at times and weak at times.maybe one of these days i will transgender,but for now i will try to stick to CD.



michelle19845

[Lauren415]

Transgender for me

[Rachel Morley]

Ooh, yes.....tricky one.

Well I don't usually volunteer this information, but at times there is a strong sexual element to my dressing (says she in her French maid's uniform - see avatar). There are also times that it's all about gender expression. Sometimes I truly want to feel like a woman and there is nothing "weird" going on in my head about wanting to be this way. However, other times I have to admit that dressing seems like a "forbidden fruit" and that I shouldn't be doing it and somehow this makes it more exciting.

Anyway, my point is that the poll (unfortunately) doesn't or couldn't include enough categories to cover the entire spectrum.

[Adele 2005]

Marla GG,

Nice post! People are complex, aren't they?! Yes, categorising whole sections of society can be heavy-handed and insensitive to the the true range of cultural diversity that surrounds us, but I don't believe this poll was intended to be divisive, or offend, or to alienate anyone (surely not here, on this forum of all places?).

It's only human to try and rationalise our own and others behaviour. Putting ourselves and others into pigeon-hole categories is just an easy way of doing that; a sort of social short-hand that means we can avoid having to think too much when there are other pressing demands needing our attention. At worst that can lead to lazy stereotyping, which can carry negative connotations fuelled by ignorance and a willful lack of understanding. I challenge anyone to honestly claim they never make these snap-judgements about people we meet everyday, and put labels on them, sometimes good, sometimes bad, without getting to know them, often simply based on how someone looks? Labels can be wrong.

But the flip side is that it's also human to want to 'belong', to find others with whom one can identify and empathise. If it wasn't for this human tendency to stick labels on vast groups of society, I would never have found this forum on a Google search. Thank god I have! Sometimes those labels can be used as a rallying cry, such as 'Gay Pride', and used for positive action. Labels can be good.

As for the sexual element, I guess any Freudian would say sexual angst drives all behaviour. I think that's since been debunked, and probably says more about Freud than society. For some here, there's no doubt or shame in feeling their behaviour is purely motivated by a sexual thrill whilst en femme. We're all important human beings with a valid reason to be here. The sexual thrill may also apply to those who identify with another category (or none, or don't know), but perhaps it isn't the reason why they CD, or are TG or TS. You see, the old-school Freudian psychologists would have us all pegged here as being motivated in our CD, TG or TS behaviour by some sexual angst, probably as a result of a childhood trauma. We just know that isn't true, don't we? So maybe in the backlash against this, the support organisations you refer to have gone to the other extreme, particularly now there's more known to day about genetics and theories about hormonal impacts on a developing foetus that may affect our behaviour.

It appears you and most of the people on here have got a more sophisticated understanding, probably because you are so close to the issue and actually care about it.

[HaleyPink2000]

I'm a Crossdresser! Tried and true. I love being a Man. I also like dressing as a woman and trying to in every way look and act during that time like a passable woman. I love dressing enfemme.

Would I be anything else if I could be? Prolly not! I would like to have breast surgery to make my Breast larger. But only with the a doctor that has done loads of them. I'd also like to win the lottery. LOLOLOLOL

Haley:)

[LindaTS]

This was an easy one for me. Transsexual. Getting closer and closer as time goes on. :)

[BonnieJG]

Crossdresser: You enjoy dressing fully as a woman but are happy with your life as a male. BUT I have a feminine being inside that LOVE'S to dress up all the time and my wife allways tell me that i should of been a GIRL so this is my change to be a GIRL (part time) I love dressing as a woman and trying to do everything as a female way look and act during that time like a woman. I love geting all dresed up trying new things dressing . But I still keep the man inside of me for all the other time

[TGMarla]

Marla, thanks for posting that. It's a simple question that comes to my mind here: If sexy lingerie didn't excite men, why would companies even manufacture and sell it in the first place? If pretty clothing on women didn't turn a man's head and arouse him, why would feminine clothing have evolved the way it did? Whether man or woman, the clothes we wear is designed to attract and in many cases, arouse the other sex. Is it any wonder that a man who finds women especially arousing when she's wearing a lace ensemble and stockings/heels, etc. would not get equally aroused if he were to wear these things himself? The same goes for pretty skirts and dresses, etc. Sure, absolutely there is a factor of expression of the feminine parts of our natures here. But I, for one, have always found crossdressing to be rather arousing as well. I won't deny it. After all, many of us have claimed to have put the shame involved here back in the drawer, and we haven't come to this point by living in denial.

There is a sexual aspect to it that goes way beyond the simple "fetish" category. I dress to "be" a woman. But I also find it arousing to do so. And I'm willing to bet that women who totally accept this behavior in their husbands do so as well. Just a guess.

Marla, you rock. Every time you post here, you have something relevant to say. Keep it coming.

[Kate]

An interesting poll, Julie, although there are always people who read way too much into this sort of thing (not mentioning any names ;)).

I am sure Julie is fully aware as all of us are that we are all individual and cannot be 100% pidgeonholed. However, for the sake of intellectual interest and broad statistics it can be interesting to form some rough categories. Having read many of Julie's other posts I am quite sure she does not think that the whole spectrum can be boiled down into the above list - that would be tantamount to saying that Harry Benjamin Scale was an accurate reflection of the transgender phenomenon, which although a semi-useful guide is also patently a huge oversimplification! :)

What I find truly fascinating is how people can shift along the spectrum. Personally for example, I definitely used to get sexual kicks from a little crossdressing (ie. Julie's fetishistic category) when I was in my early teens, but it moved from there towards more just the wanting to be in full female attire, then died out almost completely once I realised that there was no way I would ever pass. More recently, the desire to be female has become utterly overpowering and I am now a full-steam-ahead transsexual who plans to transition as fast as safely possible ie. start to finish, including FFS and GRS, within a year.

Kate.

[Mia001]

Hi,

I think I'm probably in the first category "Transvestic Fetish" but, depending on your definition of fully dressed may be in the second category "Crossdresser". "When you say Fully dressed as a woman" does that include wigs and makeup? When I dress I wear lingerie skirt and top or dress, stockings or tights and boots but no wig and no makeup. I'm not against it but it does seem like a lot of hassle for me (can't cope with having hair again). Also, no femme name. I'm quite happy to be Mark whether dressed or not.

I'm not keen on the word Transvestite. It sounds like something you get if you don't wash your hands. Crossdresser is a much nicer word and is really justan English translation of the Greek word Transvestite. I don't mind the fetish part at all. I'm pretty sure that's what it is with me and am quite happy with it. I always use the word crossdresser but my reason for crossdressing is fetishistic.

I'm going to vote in category 1 as us fetishistic crossdressers seem to be lagging a bit in the poll but I definetely think a lot of the category 2 description applies to me too.

What do you think?

Mark.

[TVStevie]

Personally, for me, It started in about 7 or 8 years old, too young for a sexual reason.
Not necessarily. I started aged 2 or 3, just mucking around wearing a pair of my mum's panties and I noticed that the tactile sensations were arousing, even at that age. I also got caught by my mum and made to feel like sh*t, hence the 30 years of guilt and self-loathing that I've been through. Maybe I was precocious, but I can remember the confusion, thinking "How can it be wrong when it feels so nice?"

Soz folks, gone off topic, but that sorta opened up a wound. By the way, great post from Marla, I couldn't agree more. :thumbsup:

[Marlena Dahlstrom]

Way to go Marla! I agree the categories just reinforce stereotypes about "nasty" fetishitic TVs and "noble" CDs and TGs (and TSs) whose dressing have nothing, nothing to do sex. Sorry folks, but the available evidence is that there's a far messier picture. I mostly dress to go out these days, but I still enjoy dressing for pleasure at times. Likewise, I know some full-time TGs (and who may transition) who love hanging out at fetish events. And I doubt the autogynephilia wouldn't have touched such a nerve if people weren't afraid there was a bit of truth in it.

(Without getting into the merits of theory, it's worth noting that Blanchard formulated it as a way to expand the behavior that was "acceptable" for SRS candidates who were routinely denied SRS if they acknowledged any sexual feelings related to their TGism.)

So as Marla said, let's acknowledge that is sometimes is sexual for a number of us. The problem isn't the sexuality, the problem arises when people cheat on their spouses, engage in unsex behaviors, etc.

[Adele 2005]

Hi Darla (and everyone else!),

Yep, cheating is despicable when otherwise pretending to be faithful to a partner. Anyway, I'm still hooked on the 'category' debate...

In the UK 'transgender' or 'TG' tends to be used as an all inclusive term that covers/celebrates every point on the gender spectrum, from extreme masculine to extreme feminine behaviour, regardless of ones apparent birth sex. Is that meaning the same in the US, or for that matter the world over?

Perhaps the problem is that it's OK to voluntarily acquire a social label (hundreds have in this poll), but personally offensive if anyone else tries to force a label on you that you do not identify with, or may even find derogatory?

Language may be imperfect, but we should acknowledge the need to develop some sort of lexicon of terminology to explain and understand the way we feel. The trouble is that traditionally this terminology has been developed by psychologists, doctors, academics and politicians (the establishment/outsiders, I suppose like Blanchard). In this age of the 'global village' and mass communication it is now possible for us (the people!) to organise and discuss what we think and believe as a world community, like never before. We now have the power to take control of how this terminology is used, we can redefine it, and we can evolve it how we want.

[Sweet Susan]

I'd like to click one of the buttons, but I can't. The descriptions are too narrow to define how I feel about myself. I guess, however, I must be a cross between number one and two.

[Redbird89]

I don't like the terminology, but Transvestic Fetish would be the best description of me. I'm not super macho, I'm not femme, I'm just a guy who gets turned on by articles of women's clothing. But unlike many fetishists, I don't like any of the kinky stuff (leather, fishnets, thongs, heels, makeup, wigs, etc). I just like the regular normal stuff, and only when it is worn by a real woman or by me.

[MandyTS]

Labels... yuck!

I fit none of them you have listed and neither does about 90% of the people here. What this poll is doing is a form of sterotyping people and that is not the best solution here. I will not pretend I know the first two things because I don't. Society on the other hand could not label me in those groups either.

I was born a mix of XY and XX, intersex, hermathodite, both male and female. I was assigned male at birth and raised as a boy. I started exhibiting classical crossdressing at an early age (about 5) and knew at about 8 I was a girl. I currently am undergoing the initial parts gender reassignment which actually works in my case, although the term transexual does not. I am not fliping or going to the opposite sex (definition of trans) because I am genetically both sexes. I am not really changing sex either, I am choosing one over the other in a dual that has me as a 12 year old pre pubrital child at 23 years of age making a grown up decision.

So lets see

I am a transgendered transexual intersexed crossdresser who is genetically a hermathodite, male assigned, auto(whatever the word was), assexual, unable to produce any of the essential hormones that makes us male or female.

No I am a girl, screw the labels!

In todays world it is becoming harder and harder to define. The only label I go with is transperson, it eliminates everything else and lets me be ME. There is no other reason to put us in a box anyway.

Sexual feelings is another story!

Mandy

[JoannaDees]

I find it easiest to consider myself transgendered. It's why I dress in varied ways, whether it's full blown girl or just some items. I don't dress for erotic reasons, but I do feel sexy when dressed. I think women are sexy. I sometimes wish I could be a woman, but I'd never transition as I know it would never work. I've 50 years of being a man, it would not work.

A friend sent me some pictures ... guy likin' ones ... and I just felt this powerful longing to be that woman. It comes and goes. I sometimes feel bad because I think I may be trying to be something I can never be. Yeah, reincarnation is the ticket. Until then, it's just be me and don't beat myself up about it, about what I think and feel.

And I too give kudos to MarlaGG for her post! Sex IS a powerful component of human nature!

[BrendaChristine]

I waffle between 2 and 3.

[Emma Brownings]

Obviously, the TG spectrum includes some individuals who crossdress for sexual reasons only, some who do so for nonsexual reasons only, and a great many who dress for both sexual pleasure and gender expression.

Hi Marla,

Thank you for your response to this thread was very eloquently written and which reflects many of my views. :bravo2:

While I tend to the Crossdresser 'label' (yuk), there are times when I feel aroused when en femme but I'm not particularly bothered whether its the clothes etc that cause it or whether it is just me feeling sexy and horny.

Certainly my wife is aware that there are times when the erotic takes priority and she is more that happy to indulge me.

[Jenn]

What category fits you best?


Transvestic Fetish: You find sexual arousal in items of clothing, but do not fully dress as a woman.
Crossdresser: You enjoy dressing fully as a woman but are happy with your life as a male.
Transgender: You feel the desire to live as a woman but also need to live as a man.
Transsexual: You wish to transition to female and have no desire to live as a male.

Oh my! This is so difficult for me to place myself. I'm a 1.. or is that a 2.... or maybe I'm a 3. There are aspects ofall of these for me.

[kymmieLorain]

D: all the above

kymmie

[Lauren Mitchell]

What category fits you best?


Transvestic Fetish: You find sexual arousal in items of clothing, but do not fully dress as a woman.
Crossdresser: You enjoy dressing fully as a woman but are happy with your life as a male.
Transgender: You feel the desire to live as a woman but also need to live as a man.
Transsexual: You wish to transition to female and have no desire to live as a male.
I openly consider myself as a CD. I am hetero and enjoy being with women and have no desires to transition. I also adore the femme side of myself, the inner woman, and enjoy being "Lauren." There is something that is part of us, as CD's that allow us to reach in and allow the woman in all of us out, even if it is for a short period of time. As such, I yearn to wear the clothing that society typically associates with GG's.

Using the term, 'transgender', to me, encompasses both CD's and TS's. Why? Because both transcend or cross the boundries of what is considered as 'normal gender.' And gender is based upon what is between the ears, not the legs.

With that said, I feel that CD's are truly transgendered, as are TS's. Only TS's desire to go further and have their sex changed by surgery and hormone therapy.

Lauren

[Janelle Marshall]

TGMarla, You have best answered how I could answer this poll. I would say that I started many years ago with the fetish angle being most prevelant. As the years roll by I am inclined to place myself into #2-3. My life requires me to be male for my family and I would not want that to change. Though I want to be a woman at times for me! I dress more provacativly than my wife ever would at times, probably because she doesn't! Yes, it does turn me on. Lately, I find I dress much more conservativly and this is just as pleasing to me as when I dress for "fetish". I guess this moves me down the list from a 1 to a 2 or 3.

[SandraInHose]

Somewhere between 1 and 2. I rarely dress fully, but I am always in pantyhose.

On another recent thread, I stated that I don't know for sure if I would have ever crossdressed if it weren't for hosiery. Skirts and panties and high heels are nice, but without pantyhose, I don't know if I ever would have started or continued dressing.

[Petra1]

Hi everyone,

I'm happily a "Crossdresser", am glad I'm a male and I love women. I wouldn't want to be a gg except as a temporary thing just to really see and feel what being a woman is all about. :p :p As if we will ever know what they're all about.

I love getting fully dressed whenever the opportunity arises, even if only for an hour or two.

Love, Cathy


Same here.

[CammyT]

Aloha,
I also agree, good question, however the answers for most of us seems to be more complicated than the options given. Perhaps a poll on this subject is too limiting.
Anyway dears, count me in as loving to dress and act en femme, but very happy as a male. For me, being bi-sexual (what am I if I love liaisons with other "girls) also plays a big part in my preferences, or lack thereof.
I do hope we all find our little niche in this world to call our own! Nothing worse than being lost in a sea of humanity alone.

[ericalynne]

definitely transsexual...i hate being a man...but because of familial responsibilites, i must live as a man, even tho i would much rather live as a woman. i have always known i was a girl/woman from a very early age...i hope that i have paid my dues in this life and will be a total woman in my next life..sigh.

[Charlene Marie]

Very much transgendered. I wish I could be in drab one day a week and Charlene the rest of the week. I'm really only truly happy and relaxed when I'm in my feminine role. This feeling as progressed over the years, I've been dressing for over thirty years now. Most male interests bore the hell out of me, as do most males. Only you girls are the exception. The shrink I went to two years ago told me I had gender dysforia, but she didn't tell me much about the symptoms.

[Sarah Smile]

I voted "transgender", but when I stop to think about it, I'm not really sure exactly where I fall. I started out in the "transvestic fetish" category 20 years ago. The fetish aspect has since disappeared, but those feelings started the process of awakening suppressed feelings within me regarding dissatisfaction with being male. Since then I have "climbed the ladder" through crossdressing and transgender, and lately have started to wonder for the first time whether I should transition. I simply don't know if I have further feelings that are being suppressed. I intend to start seeing a counsellor about it as soon as I can afford to.

[Erica4U]

I love feeling like a woman and I love dressing as well butthere is a strong desire to be female and that doesn't always mean being with men! I love women! I adore women! I enjoy lovemaking with women! I especially love when a woman likes me dressed and we share banter and thoughts as women do when together. It's tough but that's the way it really is for me!

[freshfrankie]

When I really think of what I would be comfortable with in a perfect world I would have to say this. I would always dress as a woman because that is how I feel most comfortable. I would definately get breast implants but keep my buddy down below. He does have some crazy friends but he's been very loyal and still hangs out with those two nuts he grew up with!: I guess I would love to be something not on the list, a she-male. That's just me. The best of both worlds but it really cuts down on the dating pool! Where are all you bisexual women when I need you!:) Big Hugs.

Love
Jeannie

[danielle d]

i am definately a crossdresser who loves the feeling of wearing womens clothes and dressing up.
danielle d

[Cheritv]

Somewhere between 1 and 2. There's definitely always an element of sexual arousal/gratification, but I enjoy the feeling of being femme and occasionally wear a wig/makeup/full feminine attire also. I could never pass, even on a dark night from a half-mile away, but the picture of "Cheri" in my mind is entirely different from what I project externally.

[SilkenPrincess]

Julie,
When very young, I didn't know who or what I was, although I knew something wasn't right. When I got a little older, I was afraid of who or what I was, because I realized what others would think. During my early adult years, I tried to deny who and what I was, out of fear that I couldn't live it. Now, having been through nearly 5 decades, I am finally free to face the fact that I am a transsexual. I should have been born a girl.
Love,
SilkenPrincess

[VtVicky]

A lot of very interesting posts on a topic many of us have considered in private. Marla GG's was excellent.

But I think a couple have hit on part of the problem...semantics.

Transgender vs transsexual may not be all that clear. As someone alluded to, gender is not the same as sex. "Gender is in your head, and sex is in your crotch" may be a bit too simplistic, but it leads to a bit of clarification.

Who I am does not necessarily indicate who I wish to have sexual relations with. The key may be whether we are looking internaly at ourselves. Or, externally, at how we relate to others.

Transgendered suggests that someone considers themselves to be gendered differently than they are biologically constructed.

Transsexual suggests that someone relates to others in a manner that is different from how they are situated socially by definition of their biological construction.

All of this conversation is, of course, hampered by generations of suppression of any discussion of sexuality at all. And now comes the 21st century where we can not only find out that there are others like us, and actually comunicate with them fearlessly, but we can participate in defining ourselves. I can not think of another time in liguistic history where a marginalized group has been able to participate in the in vitro definig of itself. As opposed to sitting back and letting the academic, psychological, or sociolgical communities do the defining.

So, for those of you who are still trying to define yourselves, I would suggest you consider the two factors separately. Who you are, gender-wise, vs. who you wish to relate to sexually.

And then it gets a little more complicated when you take into consideration that much of what we humans find sexually exciting is sociolgically taught to us during our developmental years. At the same time as we are being taught what external trappings define gender.

If I learn that a bra, for example, is sexually stimulating and that it is generally associated with women, where do I stand when I also learn that wearing a bra myself is sexually stimulating?

This has gotten a lot longer than I anticipated, sorry.

As for me? I fall into the apparent minority of #1. I'm just an aging overweight white guy, who loves the look and feel of the silky and feminine. And chooses to excersize that affection by myself, separate from, and in addition to, my female relationships. I'll never pass. But I don't need to. When I look in the mirror, I can ignore the parts that don't work and enjoy the look and feel of what does.

Good luck every one.

[ReginaK]

I voted transgendered. I'd say i'm transgendered/borderline transexual.

I don't feel like I should have been born a woman in the classic transexual sense. It's a more of a conscious choice of me just wanting to be a woman. But due to physique, family issues, and my own reluctance to share my thoughts with a professional therapist, I see myself being stuck as a crossdresser for the time being.

Luckily those are all things I can work on, so who knows where i'll be in a few years, or even a few months.

[Fiona K]

Difficult one mainly due to a difference in language accross the Atlantic.

If you read Helen Boyd's book she drops the term Fetish when refering to Transvestites though fully acknowleges the sexual element- something that challenges so many CDs who'd prefer that part be kept quiet. The word fetish as got connotations (see Julie York's elequent assesment, I hjave to say that's how I felt when I saw the poll so heb not voted)

For me? I'm a Transvestite, I dress fully as a woman, I want to do so as much as I can and I'm not interested in only the clothes, I need the lot- hair, make-up, jewelery and when my courage is eventually in place to go out and be ignored.

I feel more alive dressed. I don't really get a sexual kick anymore, as I used to but I won't deny the potential is there, but it isn't the prime motivator.

In the UK the term Crossdresser is very rarely used, it stems from TriESS (which doesn't exist over here) and Virginia Price who wasn't too keen on Transvestite as a word and spent a lot of time trying to come up with a "less clinical" word. Not to mention denying the possiblity that Trannies or CDrs coule ever be gay or progress to transition.

So lables are hard, the English langage is tricky and the differences between sisters across the water can cause even more confusion!!

Fiona
xx

[Lisa Golightly]

Glamsexual. If I'm going to be put in a box by anyone then it'll be a box of my own creation.

[AnnaMaria]

I would have to say transgender simply because of the fact that while I do dress androgynous quite often when I go out other than for work I do still see the need to have the male side of me around. Not only for my wife and family but because of my career and the fact that computer business owners are still predominantly male in todays society and business owners seem to feel more comfortable with a male working on their computers than a female for some reason.
Thought I do admit there are a growing number of women in the field which makes me happy.

anna

[Katie Ashe]

:rant: Extremely Transgendered and socially unaccepted.

[Bridget]

I would say transgender, because, although I like being male, I would also enjoy and see myself as being female too. I dub it being bigender, as I really see myself as sort of a bit of both.

And the labels are sort of unofficial though because according to my local LGBT center at UC Davis:

"The Minnesota Human Rights Act defines transgender individuals as "having or being perceived as having a self-image or identity not traditionally associated with one's biological maleness or femaleness". The identity of a transgender person differs from their physical sex as assigned at birth and there is no definitive answer as to what causes one to be born this way. Transgender is a broad term which includes pre-operative and post-operative transsexuals; transgenderists (persons living full-time in a gender opposite their birth sex with no desire to pursue surgery); transvestites or cross-dressers, and those whose gender expressions occasionally differs from their birth sex. The largest subgroup of transgender persons are heterosexual men who engage in occasional crossdressing."

[Julie]

I have to agree that there is a problem with the way this poll is constructed, because it seems to suggest that partial crossdressers are the only ones who get sexual gratification from dressing, and conversely, that those who dress fully en femme are not sexually motivated at all.

Marla,

When I posted this I was recalling as best as I could the definitions of each as they were explained to me by an experienced and very well read gender therapist. I suppose it would have been better to have said something like 'attracted to' rather than defining it in a sexual aspect. I was just trying to state it as closely as possible how it was told to me. I apologize if I offended anyone.

[Adele 2005]

I wouldn't apologise Julie, as I don't believe you've offended anyone with this poll, but raised some thought provoking discussion.

Over the weeks it has highlighted a dichotomy many people feel: that on the one hand we cling to our individuality and rebel against conforming to a 'label', yet also feel the need to belong and identify with others. Why else would any of us have joined this forum?

[Ms. Laura]

Like so many have answered, I would say "crossdresser." I wonder what it would be like to be female, but I wouldn't trade off forever. Too much of my life and identity are male, there is just another facet that needs to get out!

[FionaAlexis]

I describe myself as transgendered - simply because it is a broader, more generic, label.

In the past I have labelled myself as 'transsexual' and then 'non transitioning transsexual' - but the general community interpretation of those labels is more about what you are doing about it and your lifestyle than how you feel.

Fiona xx

[Faye Emmette]

Julie, to suit the parameters of four choices I had to go for Transgender though I've never thought of myself as that.
I can and do live as a woman in my little cottage in suburbia but the hard world has to be faced so I am a bloke out there.
What drew me to this forum topic though was the "..Classify Yourself.." and I was dying to answer simply "Tall, slim, poised raven haired beauty". Oh well. :) ;)

[Marlena Dahlstrom]

Julia, thanks for clarifying. I don't doubt that the therapist you cited probably did use those categories -- it's a case where the labels, even those used by professionals, don't adequately reflect reality.

In part it's because people on the TG spectrum haven't been completely honest about sexuality. Unfortunately, TSs learn to deny any sexual overtones in order to get past the gatekeepers to SRS (who've deemed this as something that disqualified candidates). Likewise, Tri-Ess and other CD groups went a bit overboard in their bid for respectability and denied that sexuality can be a part of crossdressing for some at some times, even if they're otherwise "good girls."

[AshevilleCD]

Guess I'd also have to go with transvestic fetish. My crossdressing which usually involves full slips, chiffon layered nighties or panties but can involve almost any kind of lingerie is almost always aimed at sexual satisfaction. I do however love the generally feminine feeling I get from wearing these things and usually spend quite a bit of time just wearing and prancing around in front of the mirror before "manual stimulation" takes over.

This is my first post by the way, I really love this site and look forward to sharing more with you all.

[Imogen_Mann]

Not trying to sound "cool" or anything, I just havent really ever classified myself... on the occasions I've tried, I always end up saying I am "such and such" then adding "BUT.... "

I think I'm just me, and I strive to be whoever I am to the best of my ability.

XX

Jayme.

Ps.. Is Transvestic really a word ??

[Tiffany Anne 9954]

Crossdresser for sure as i have to maintain my male self for work and such. Tiffany only comes out when i want her to come out. She comes out sometimes when i want to relax and unwind. Wearing a pretty dress or gown is something i cant be without when iam dressed as Tiffany

[Kimberley]

This is such a tough one and actually one I was working on before I found this site. I have been writing an autobio to try and put this in perspective. I started when I was 3 (well sort of) Kimberley has always been there and to be totally honest I THINK I had to learn my male traits. Kimberley was pushed down for decades and finally she started kicking and screaming to be listened to. It took a near breakdown for that to happen but I found a fantastic counsellor who helped us to get along with one another.

My pdoc hasnt really delved into this whole gender issue...yet! At any rate her initial opinion is CD but as I said, she doesnt have all the facts, emotions and opinions of both of us (Kimberley and me). We will get there soon enough and maybe I will get some answers.

What all of us know is that we live in a very gray world and in my opinion I think labeling does none of us any justice. Are we not reinforcing the opinions of the public at large by labeling ourselves instead of saying "Hi I am ..." and later when we are comfortable, "Let me introduce you to Kimberley?" Hmmm.

[Miriannah]

I'd have to say something inbetween transgender & transsexual. As a perfectionist, I wouldn't want the full operation/everything unless painfully masculine things about me (like my voice) could be changed as well. Also, I don't know if I'd want to risk losing 'that feeling' you get when you're doing the nasty. Can something like that even be properly carried over in a sexchange in the first place? :o

[Olivia33]

This is a toughie but I would have to say a crossdresser verging on transgender

[HaleyPink2000]

Big Question!

I feel a little like 1,2 & 3 not 4.

I've found that many times I'd like to wear womens clothing 24/7 and to dress completely all the time. Then there are times I would only dress very male. Hunting, etc.

But again I feel that I am more female than male. Most of the time. I'd not transition because I'm inlove. So so very in love with my wife of 25 years. But maybe someday I'll take the time to go away for a week just by myself. So that I can dress completely in another area of the country. Away from everything. But in two years I won't care who knows. Retirement is coming quick. The wife knows but don't like it that I do it.

I like dressing as a female to the max. Heels. lipstick & everything. Nothing taboo!

Haley:)

[Stephanie_Wish]

2. Crossdresser
Greatly enjoy full makeover experience, but not yet confident enough to venture outside the house.

[danielle65]

I am most definately a crossdresser.:thumbsup:

[Jenny Warren]

I've never been comfortable with all those labels.

Basically, I'm just me, call me what you like, so long as you call me when dinners ready.

I don't think I'd like to really be a woman, 'cos then I'd have to find a new 'hobby'. If you think about it, if you were really a woman, you'd just be getting dressed, rather than getting DRESSED

I would like proper breasts though, but they'd cause problems with my work as I often have to change in front of others. (I've inadvertantly done that wearing 'Jenny's' knickers before now) .

Having said that, I spend over 50% of my time in female mode, only switching to male mode when circumstances dictate it.

Jenny

[Sierra Evon]

CD/transgender gifted,gurl
"like as if.............."LOL.........SIERRA;)

[Stacy Reso]

im a cd with a transvestic fetish

[Wendall1957]

You can put me down as mainly having a feminine fetish, not just the clothes but in my understanding of the behavior. :angel:

I also like to go all the way in dressing up at time, especially on the not often occassion when my wife is looking for Mistress Wendy instead of Master Wendall. :dom:

But, I am 99 44/100ths happy to be a man. Never thought of having my "tender bits" reassigned. :)

I like to grow a beard in the winter, plus hose and heels don't go well with being in the field hunting or camping. :bs:

Ah well, what's a boy to do+?

Be good, but if you can't be good,
do the bad thing well!

[Leggy Ashley]

I would love to be a full woman and kill the man inside but for now just a tg.
Kisses
delighla

[Danai]

Well....a bit of both is my answer...Love living like a girl as I love living like a guy....

[Tina Dixon]

Pretty easy so far, crossdresser, just because of time I get to be Tina, but I am working toward the next step what ever that may be I don't know, but I do want to be Tina much more.

[Shannon S.]

Crossdresser got my vote. :)

I am very comfortable as a male. However, as an artist with a high level of observation and knowledge seeking prowess, I've always been open to putting myself in the female perspective. Like a split personality to a slight degree. I have only recently started to openly give some real time and space to my feminine side. Let her explore and grow a little. Her personality and feminine viewpoints have always been with me since I can remember... but she now has a name (Shannon) and wishes to explore the physical realm. Hence forth the introduction of crossdressing.

I am intrigued by the art of feminization and Shannon is enjoying every moment I let her step into the spotlight. Femininity is a lot of hard work and patience. I'm not exactly sure how much time or space I will give her... but it has certainly been a great learning experience thus far. It's been surprisingly refreshing, a nice release of stress and even emotionally stimulating as well.

This forum has definately opened my eyes to a secret world that I knew was out there... but never fully understood or respected until now.:bs:

:<3:Shannon S.:<3:

[Reana]

Based on the choices and definitions, Crossdresser, but with one foot slightly in the TG world. +? :)

[Krystal Lee]

Julie,

As others have noted it is a hard choice but transgendered is the closest to the way I feel at this point in my life.

I love to fully dress and love going out (don't get to as much as I would like to) but still have a need to be male, at least untill my son is raised and out of the house.

After that...... Well we will see won't we.

Hugs Krystal.

[Mona]

My experience is like Wendy's, I chose transgendered partially because I still like my male self, partially because it seems to really describe how I feel.

[Gunda]

Definately a CD now but it was certainly something more fetishistic when I was young.

Best,
Gunda

[Satina Silky]

I'm 100% fetishistic transvestite. I like that I'm male but I need to wear silk and satin lingerie, sleepwear and blouses. There's nothing better than silk and satin.

[Pink Satin]

I am definately a transvestic fetishist, and also definately a crossdresser.
I enjoy both equally, although the former also involves my wife, the latter does not. I am not attracted to men. Women rock my world:D

[Rhiannon]

.My best friend from high school is a PHD Psycologist and wears panties under his suit.Go figure.

You say 'Go Figure', but to me, why should the fact that a PHD Psychologist who wears panties under his suit undermine the serioussness of his work or his authority as a Psychologist? Or for that matter, if a Doctor, a Fireman, a Policeman or a Psychiatrist wore stockings (if a male) or boxer shorts (if female) or a red nose (if neither), why should that undermine my belief in his knowledge or of his or her intention to treat me with the respect and compassion that I deserve??


Rhiannon x x

[Leigh Davis]

Yes, this is a toughie, only given 4 categories. I picked #2, but I think #1 and #2 is probably more true.

[Meag]

I don't know where to put myself. I wear panties and hose all the time, put skirts and slips most of the time, I think I wear a bra to feel like and look like the women I would like to be. I don't wear a wig or makeup, yet. My wife does not want to see me in a bra, but knows I wear one when she is not here. She has seen the top of my full slips though my t-shirts, I do wear panties, hose, skirts, slips and heels while she is home and she gives me pointers on how to walk and dress like a lady, and insists that I wear a slip with a skirt. So I don't know where that puts me, as I spend so much of my time in, at least a skirt. I guess I'm a crossdresser, but would be happy to be able to throw away all my male clothes. I just feel better dressed as a women. I don't feel that it is a sexual thing at all. I'm confused as to what I am by name. I guess I am happy just being me in women clothes.

Meag

[bobbi(CO)]

I answered don't know, have been crossdresser for years a now am curious about being with a man as Bobbi

[Natalie J]

That's the million dollar question, isn't it? For me personally, it changes all the time. I have times where I wish I was a girl, times I'm glad not to be, and definately (more often than not) times I'm glad I can look pretty much any way I see fit. I guess my answer is crossdresser; that's what's always felt right.

[alisoncdnj]

I though I was a crossdresser, as I have worn female clothing for years. As a child I always dreamed of being a girl and praying I would grow breasts like my sisters. I was able to suppress my feeling for years, secretly dressing in my sisters clothing. I have also secretly dressed in wifes clothes and have worn lingerie in my wifes presents. I could not take it any more. While shopping for lingerie with my wife, I purchased my first breast forms. I told he of my desire to dress in female clothing and she has been very understanding.

I have always had feelings that I was born in the wrong body, however I have suppressed them, by crossdressing. I can no longer suppress them. I have decided that I will transition as a women. So I guess I am transgendered moving towards transsexual. I am happier when dressed as a woman. I am presently seeing a therapist and she has been a big help in dealing with my feeling and emotions. I am taking it one day at a time and I hope to start taking hormones (under a doctors supervision) at the end of this year or early 2007.

[cdsheri6977]

:cool: i would have to say 3 as thats how my life has been up tell now,for the most part anyways:cool: :doll: but i have to say 4 two cause i do want to live as a women be a women all the time and i know in my heart some day i will live as a women 100% of the time. its not that i dont like the male me i have had a good life lots of fun good friends its just that sheri feels more like me she's happyer she has more fun she feels good about her self the way she looks, feels, walks, talks, act's, dress's the way she looks at every thing is just better,:doll: so its 4 but im living 3 :cry: sheri

[ashlee chiffon]

put me down for one of each! i can't make my mind up on just one! *L*

[PTPJen]

Well I started out early in Life as a fetish, Late in 30's became a Crossdresser, and now in my 50's wear panties, and nylons every day and now also wear a bra every day. I'm Transgender. Don't want the operation, but like the daily thing about being feminie everyday. And once your wear a Bra Everyday, You can never be like the other guys and never go back to being just a guy...:happy: :happy:

[Jodie_Lynn]

After some thought, I responded "Transgender".

I enjoy aspects of my maleness, and my femaleness.

If wishes could come true, mine would be able to be either gender as my mood struck. And as the sales hit at the shops.....

[Falcor]

Another option maybe,It's all too confusing.....I wander in and out of first and second options
fal

[bob_bobbi]

For me it feels more like a transvestism fetish right now, but i imagine that will change over time to cross dresser as i become more confident.

[Denise]

Transgender. But I have had fantasies of being a full female. Which would be interesting. But I find myself attracted to women, not men, so I would have a lot to learn!

[Mistress Frillee]

I am a dude that likes to wear womens clothes. I do not see myself as a woman. I am straight & am attracted tsexually to females.

Then again, I do not do the wig & makeup thing. I do not want to go by a female name. I do not want to act like a female, do the mannerisms, etc......

[julieinsilk]

This is a very thought provoking thread. I would definetly say that I am transgendered.
I cant explain it but over the last couple of years I have increasingly wanted to live as a woman and dream and fantasise about what it would be like to dress and live as a woman 24 hours.
I am increasingly becoming disillusioned with having to live up to the perceived macho male culture ( which I find increasingly pathetic), and I have to admit that I now prefer the company of women socially much more then men.
On the other hand I am finding myself more sexually attracted to men. I am not sure if these desires are due to my changing sense of who I am and where I want to go but I definetly want to explore this further. I can envisage the day when I finally discard all of my drab clothes and wear the clothes and assume the identity that I feel most comfortable with but do feel that this day is some way off.

Julie x

[Sonia_cd]

Great poll! I would have to choose crossdresser simply because the definition of transgender says "feel the need to live as a woman". I'm not sure if there was any intent to imply so, but to me it includes living and experiencing life as a woman in all aspects of life, including sexual.

Thats where I differentiate myself from the two and choose crossdresser being fully aware that reversed roleplay is not something that I might choose. Then again, having not experienced that, I reserve the right to amend or retract my vote at some unknown subsequent date!!:D

[Snookums]

I'm just a hetro man who prefers to wear womens clothes,I don't make any attempt to make my self passable as a woman.With a handle bar mustache,a high and tight haircut,and all this body hair,maybe I should look for a job as a side show attraction in a circus.:eek: